Chapter dedicated to TeamJonStark. Thanks for reading, voting and commenting, you clever girl! lol

Music: Deep End by Ruelle

Chapter 139 –I Couldn't Do This Anymore– Raine's POV

It had been five days since Ileana arrived. She had asked me to no longer refer to her as a queen since she and Armand meant nothing to each other anymore. I easily agreed because it seemed to make her more comfortable not to be reminded of that part of her history.

Marku was still upset with me, but he tried not to show his irritation. I just couldn't do what he wanted. He wanted me to release the mate bond I had with Cage and I just couldn't. I wouldn't. I had known as soon as Marku brought up the fact that I had freed Ileana, what he was thinking. I wasn't even sure I could remove the bond, but I had suspected it as well.

He had spent more time training Talon, probably to release the aggression he felt toward me. But Talon was strong enough to take it. He and Talon were in the gym now.

I stood in my sleep shirt and shorts, trying to decide what to wear. Loki was restless, whining. He nudged his big head gently into my belly, rubbing one side of this face and then the other against my skin. I scratched him under the ears and murmured, "What's wrong, boy? Why so anxious?"

Abruptly, a sharp pain shot through my lower spine. I froze. My brain struggled to comprehend what was happening. I was a vampire now. I shouldn't experience random pain! Loki whined again.Did he know what was happening to me? Adrenaline coursed hard through my veins. I held my breath. Maybe I had imagined it.

Several minutes went by...and nothing. I dropped to the couch and tried to control my trembling. Shit, as if I didn't already have enough pain, now my head was adding imaginary pain to go with it. What the hell was wrong with me?

Just as I stood to my feet again, another pain hit, this one harder. I fell forward, curling in on myself. It felt like my insides were being ripped out. I gasped and panted. There was no way I had imagined that!

And then I felt the blood.

A warm gush, soaking my panties and running in crimson trails down my legs.

Oh, God no...please!

Not this.

Anything but this! I prayed.

Another pain hit hard, this time radiating to my lower belly, my abdomen clenched tight. It was excruciating. The pain...the blood...it could only mean one thing.

But it wasn't possible...I couldn't be pregnant! Only royal vampires could conceive a naturally born vampire. Oh shit! A cold cruel reality crashed over me. Cage had become a royal vampire when my mark transferred to him during our mating ceremony. And I had stepped into my destiny weeks later, exchanging my human status for that of a royal vampire. Neither of us had even considered pregnancy a possibility. At least I hadn't.

Sweat rolled off of me. I panted, trying to think. At the very most I could be about twelve weeks pregnant. Maybe I was wrong.

But even as I thought it, I knew I wasn't wrong. I stood frozen in place, unable to think, unable to move as more and more blood trailed down my legs. Another pain hit, even worse. I groaned and dropped to my knees.

Thirty minutes this went on. I never made a sound. Just panted through the contractions. It was agony. Abruptly, I felt soft tissue gush into my panties. My hands shook uncontrollably as I slid them down off of my legs, careful not to disturb the little one resting there. I collected the tiny body in the palm my hands. There was no mistaking what I was staring at. Translucent tan skin.  No more than three inches in length but beautifully formed. Tiny hands wrapped up around an equally tiny head. Little legs tucked into a rounded belly. Eyes closed, peacefully sleeping, never to wake.

My child.

Cage's child!

I could have held a piece of Cage in my arms for eternity. But I had failed. My body had failed. This was my fault. Cage's baby was dead because of me. The wail began low in my belly, feral devastation, building, growing, before ripping from my throat, "No!!!"

I gasped, tears coursing down my cheeks, droplets wetting the little lost life in my hands.

No! No more!

I couldn't do this anymore!

Not now.

I had tried, really I had. But this was too much.

Ileana burst into the room, her eyes wild, looking for the danger. She clamped a hand over her mouth to stifle her cry when she saw me covered in blood, holding my dead young.

I struggled to stand. My hands trembled, I tried to hold them still as I brought the little one up to place a tender kiss on its head. I sobbed, "I'm sorry I failed you...but you won't be alone. Mommy's coming, baby."

I staggered to the bathroom, trailing blood soaked footprints as I went, and pulled a clean washcloth from the cabinet. Walking back to the bed, I made a tiny rounded nest and placed my little one carefully in the center. Talon would give him a proper burial. I knew it as sure I stood there. I leaned in close and whispered one last goodbye, "Give daddy a kiss for me...tell him I'll see him soon."

"What are you doing?!" Tears streamed down Ileana's cheeks.

I ignored her, focused only on the task at hand. I couldn't risk a knife. Marku could still save me. And that would be if I could find one. Not likely. No, there was only one option. One sure way to end it all. Sunlight. It burned brightly outside. I just had to make it to an exterior exit. One teensy step and I would be in Cage's arms again. I faced Ileana. "Tell Talon and Marku I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye."

She grabbed my arm and cried, "No! You can't do this! I won't let you!"

"You can't stop me," I reminded her. She had relinquished her total obedience to me when she accepted my bond. She stared at me in horror.

I said nothing else. I just turned and ran.

I heard her scream, "Marku! Her baby's gone. She's running...toward the sun!"

Shit, I had forgotten she still had a phone. Oh well, I had enough of a head start. He couldn't catch me now. I was too far away and gaining more ground each second. There was only one thought in my mind, one goal, one directive and it wouldn't be denied. I had to get to my child and no force on this earth was going to stop me. Power reverberated in my bones. More power than I had ever felt before.

I heard him before I saw him, Marku's dangerous angry growls echoing off the walls. Fuck, how had he gotten so close, so soon? I pushed faster. I wasn't going to make it to a ground floor door, which meant a balcony would have to do.

I entered the atrium, at a dead run. I just needed to reach the balcony in the middle of the room. Marku charged toward me from the other direction, his body moving like an animal, smooth, powerful, deadly.

I couldn't turn back now. As I bolted across the room, I calculated the odds of me reaching the doors before he reached me. I could make it! I would have no other opportunity after this. He would keep me locked up.

I was just one step from the door. He lurched forward, trying to grab my arm with his fingers. "No!!!" his roar echoed in my ears. There was pain in his cry. But I was too strong, too lost, too damaged. It was too late. I slipped through his fingers, burst through the door, sending shards of glass and wood splinters everywhere.

A woman screamed. From the corner of my eye, I saw Brialle with Felaern running toward me on the green grass below. There was no slowing my momentum. I tumbled through the air. There was only one place I could land. As I hurdled over the balcony, I felt the sunlight hit me...

..........

I expected to hit the ground with a thud or maybe just a pile of ashes. Neither happened. Instead, my body collided with a massive frame of muscles. Black wings wrapped around me protectively as he rolled in the air, trying to land with the least amount of damage. Killian!

Still, we hit hard. I was on my back, coughing to catch my breath. He hovered over me protectively. But I was too exposed. The sun should have incinerated every inch of me it touched...but nothing.

How was this possible?

"Noooo," I cried. I couldn't even kill myself properly. Why couldn't the universe just let me die?

Marku had leapt over the balcony and was now crouched by my head.

Brialle was frantic, "What happened to her?!"

I occurred to me that blood still ran freely down my legs and I wore nothing beneath my thigh-length sleep shirt. Killian lifted off of me carefully. Brialle took his place, smoothing my shirt over my hips and clutching me to her chest. Her hands were in my air, soothing as she murmured, "Shh...I'm here now. You're okay. What happened, sweet girl?"

The dam broke. Suddenly, I was overwhelmingly thankful to have my mother. I sobbed into her hair, "He's gone...my baby."

She inhaled sharply. Her head snapped to Marku. He spoke through clenched teeth, still furious with me, "It was Micage's. None of us knew until just now."

Killian asked, "How is she still alive?"

Both Felaern and Marku answered, "Her mark."

Oh, it made sense now. I had forgotten that Felaern had mentioned there was a sun in the mark Cage and I shared! Killian bristled at the sound of Felaern's voice and glared at him with bared teeth.

"Not now," Marku snapped at him. Killian took a step back. Marku's voice was hard. "Brialle, may I have a moment with your daughter please?"

She looked at me. I nodded. She stood to her feet and stepped back to Felaern.

Even though he was still clearly angry with me, Marku grasped my arms gently. His words were less gentle. He hissed, "You need to release the bond! I understand why you don't want to, but its killing you!"

I ground my jaw together and refused to answer him.

Felaern interrupted softly, "If I may..."

Marku looked up at him, sighed heavily and then stepped back from me to allow Felaern room. Felaern crouched down. His lips didn't move, but I heard his voice in my head: "Little one, so much pain..."

Tears fell from my eyes.

His eyes were soft as he asked permission: "Will you let me feel your pain?"

"What?" I whispered silently, not fully understanding what he wanted to do.

"To help you, I need to touch you, feel your pain. I need to know which parts of you hurt."

I sat fully up and pulled my legs beneath me to the side.

The new scars on my legs didn't miss his attention. He frowned. "Are those self-inflicted?"

I cringed. "Yes."

He nodded, his mouth tight. He leaned in close to me and brought both hands up to my head. With incredible gentleness, he applied pressure with his palms against my temples.

I wasn't sure what response I expected but whatever it was, it wasn't what happened next. As soon as his fingers touched my skin, he gasped and stumbled forward off balance. Brialle gripped him from behind to steady him. She whispered urgently, "What is it? What's wrong with her?!"

Felaern's breathing came out loud and labored, as he clutched my head tighter, his hands trembling. Fear rolled through me. What was he feeling? What could be so bad to have this devastating effect on one of the strongest males I knew?! After a long minute, he let go and looked at Brialle. There were tears streaming down his cheeks. Now I was really scared.

He whispered, "It's her!"

She grasped his face, cupping his chin, "It's who? Who are you talking about?"

"Fee."

She inhaled sharply.

Adrenaline ran hard and fast through my body.

It couldn't be.

My mouth was dry. I asked, "Is Fee a nickname for Sofielle?"

He nodded.

Killian gasped loudly and demanded, "Are you sure, bastard?! Are you telling me my mother is alive?!"

Holy fuck! Lady Sofielle was Felaern's mate!  And Killian's mother?!

My head spun. But it didn't change anything. I spat angrily, "She killed Cage!"

He looked back at me and shook his head. "No, she didn't."

My hands balled into fists. "Yes, she did! I watched him die. I told him goodbye. She burned his body!" I could barely get the words out as the memories crashed over me.

There was tremendous sadness and pain in his eyes, but hope at the same time. "If I know anything about my mate, at least a part of what you saw was an illusion and she transported him through a portal for safekeeping."

"Why?!" I cried. None of it made sense. Why would she hurt me like that?  Why hurt Cage?

Another tear slipped down his cheek. "For me...it's a trail for me...I can find her now."

I couldn't breathe. He had searched for his mate for centuries. And all of this time, my grandfather had her?! There was no way she was there of her own free will. I saw it so clearly now. Her anger, hate, all deception so that bastard Acheron wouldn't see her true plan.

"I'm sorry, little one, that you went through such trauma, but I cannot be sorry that she did it. She has linked into Cage's side of the bond, which is why I can feel it in you. The pain of separation you feel is real, and its possible he is still hurt, but he is very much alive. And I will be able to follow the trail she left for me now."

My thoughts churned, blocking everything else out and focusing on just three words:

Cage was alive!

.

Soooo, thoughts?