"those we love never truly leave us. there are things that death cannot touch."
---

"Today we are here to have a remembrance of a girl named Alexis Carter. She was a kind soul who was taken from us too soon." The priest said as he stood next to her grave. "I'm devasted of the loss of Alexis Carter because two years ago I had to hold a funeral for three other people with the same last name. Leah Carter, Nicolas Carter, and Jack Carter. Now we have lost another family member in the same way we lost them. A tragic car crash."

I was the last person she talked to. I am the last person who had spoken to her.

I feel like this is all my fault. If I hadn't called her then this wouldn't happen.

I wouldn't be standing in a graveyard with a bunch of people Alexis knew with a black suit on, trying to keep my emotions together. But here I am.

At the funeral of the girl, I love.

Life really knows how to kick you in the ass.

"Now whoever would like to say a few words you can come up to the stand." The priest said before walking off.

I see Isabelle and Wes walk to the stand. Isabelle was trying so hard to keep it together, but she couldn't.

Only a few more seconds and she would break.

"Alexis loved to write and read poems with her mother Leah. I found her journal and I wanted to read a poem she wrote." Isabelle sniffled before opening the book and reading. "There's a stillness about grief. A process. An overwhelming hush. Some days it screams about the one I miss. Someday it's a peace that there is more. Some days it's a silent mending as tiny broken pieces are put back together." Isabelle let out a sigh and I see a tear stroll down her cheek.

"It's okay mom I can finish," Wes whispered to her and kiss her on the temple before taking the book. "In any form, I don't mind the quiet-it's a sign of endless love, a richness, an undying hope. I am learning that the quiet is part of the scared mess of grief, of aching, of mending, of becoming whole when part of you is gone. It's sacred and holy, and because of that, it makes me feel an inch closer to them. I don't want the quiet to leave." Wes said softly before closing the book. "My cousin and I didn't talk a lot, but we cared for each other. No matter what. Alexis Carter, I will never forget you and I am sorry."

"Alexis was such a happy happy girl. When her parents died, she didn't have a reason to want to be alive again but then she found friends and a boy who made her feel happy again. I am so happy I got to see her happy one last time." Isabelle said before she broke out in sobs. "I just wished she was here a little longer." Isabelle starts crying and Wes brings her to her seat in the front.

I see Willow walk onto the stand with tears in her eyes. "I have only known Alexis for a few months, but it feels like we have been friends for eternity. Alexis was never the type to party or go out. She was never the type to care for herself. She only ever cares for others and made sure they were okay before anything else. Alexis was the best friend I needed, and I am so grateful to have known her and been friends with her. I love you so much, Alexis. I really hope you kick ass up there." Willow chuckled lightly and so did some people who were sitting in the crowd.

Willow walked off and I see Ethan, Mathew, and Grayson walk to the stand together.

"We haven't known Alexis for a while, but I know that she was the type of girl you wouldn't only meet once in your life. She was unique and extraordinary. There was no girl like her." Mathew said with a sad look on his face.

"Alexis was a hell of a friend," Ethan said with a smile on his face. But it was a sad one. "She and I had these inside jokes that I don't think I will ever forget. I will keep using those jokes so that I can remember her. Alexis is a girl that, as Mathew said, you would only meet once in your life."

Grayson takes the stand now and he is holding a rose before throwing it on her casket. "I never talked to Alexis a lot. But she was my friend nothing less. I consider her my family because she was there for me when I needed her to be. She was there for my daughter who I would give anything in the world. I wish that Alexis and I talked more than we did. I wish we shared more things with each other and sadly we didn't which I feel horrible for. But I wish her the best and I hope she finds peace." Grayson said softly before all three of them walk off the stand.

I sighed and stood up from my seat and walk to the stand.

Everyone was staring at me with sad eyes. Some people have tears in their eyes. I hate funerals.

"I am the last person Alexis talked to before she crashed the car. She was telling me about the dream she had that night. It was of her with her family in the garage." I smiled remembering the memory. I had just woken up and I wanted to hear her voice. Didn't know it was going to be the last time I would hear her voice though. "Alexis is the only girl I have ever loved, and I think will ever love. Alexis is like no girl I have ever met, as everyone has said for the past hour but it's true. Alexis was funny, amazing, her laugh is something I would die to hear again, and god her smile just brightens up the entire room. But she was also damaged, almost as damaged as I am and that is why I think we clicked so much. She would still have a smile on her face no matter what and that is what I loved so so much about her." A tear slips down my cheek. I throw a rose on her casket. "I wish we both have more time."