❝The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves.❞

- William Penn

[ H U N T E R   W I L L I A M S ]

When I woke up, I was getting assaulted by both the light coming from the window and my head. I stared right at the white ceiling above me, still laying in this surprisingly comfortable couch at Mr Featherhead's apartment.

Memories from last night and the party were finally rushing back into my head, causing me to sit up. Holy fucking shit, Bailey got pregnant with Eli's child. A searing, hot knife of betrayal lodged through my chest.

Suddenly, things that were a complete enigma to me somehow made sense. The way Eli and Bailey acted months prior made sense, maybe Eli King wasn't worth looking up to at all. If I could go back to my freshman year, I would've done things differently with this knowledge.

I figured Eli and Bailey were cheating for a long time before I found out, how could I have been so fucking stupid and naive?

I wanted to let go of the tears that were building up, but I think I've already had my limit. I was not going to spiral back into the pit of despair because of my ex-acquaintances, they could go to hell.

I knew I couldn't just ignore this feeling forever, but I was not as weak as I was just a month ago, I was not going to let streams run down my face at any mental obstacle in my road to happiness. I was right about one thing though, something bad was bound to happen, things were just going a little too well for me.

My train of thoughts had come to a sudden stop when I heard footsteps coming from around the corner - I figured that's where Blake's bedroom was.

I was half expecting a sleepy Mr Featherhead to pop in around the corner, but instead, I was met by a strawberry blonde woman heading for the door of the apartment, she was dressed in regular clothing, scavenging the floor for her shoes.

She was completely oblivious to my presence on the couch until she bent down to put on her shoes properly. The woman looked at me with a blank expression and I stared back at her.

A blink from her was countered with one from me, I was kind of enjoying the awkwardness.

Just like that, a few moments later she had gone through the door without uttering a word. I figured that was for the best. That must've been the 'friend' that was staying at Blake's, I thought to myself, unnecessarily bitter.

I pushed this moral dilemma to the side when Blake mentioned her, but I couldn't do that again. I don't know whether I was growing possessive of Blake Carter, or I was still unknowingly intoxicated, but one thing was for sure, I didn't like the fact that he slept around with a random woman. I knew it was my idea to get him out of the classroom just so he would stop ignoring the world and that was the worst part.

Next time I see him staying at school for an unnecessary amount of time, I'm going to leave him. I mentally said to myself.

I knew some kind of chemistry had been brewing between Blake and I. I wasn't as oblivious as one would think. The fact that I felt this jealous over Blake having a one-night stand and the fact that he made me feel like a giddy school girl sometimes, wasn't just a dumb coincidence or some kind of an illegal substance's fault.

I never really had the chance to explore my sexuality or anything of the sorts - I mentioned previously that I wasn't interested in any form of relationships until I met Bailey. I was content with her, but I never denied the possibility of being with a member of the same gender in my head. Sure, I wasn't exactly drawn to having sex with either gender and my relationship with Bailey was an example of that.

Maybe, I was just weird. Okay, I was weird. I was ranting to myself about my sexual orientation and the possible feelings that were growing for Blake Carter - my advanced English literature teacher. 

Perhaps, Evelyn Hale was onto something way before I was, she was extremely suggestive when I had to spend time with Blake and I always brushed it off as some kind of a cruel joke. Was Evelyn a homosexual prophet?

Maybe she picked up on the fact that I wasn't exactly as heterosexual as I appeared to the general public. I would always stick up for the openly gay kids or 'different' people at my school and make sure they weren't bullied. I wanted to make sure people could come to school without being afraid of people, who were so locked inside their heads that they refused to accept any kind of 'abnormality'.

Perhaps, I didn't know myself as well as I thought I did, but that's the beauty of growing up. One thing was for sure though, I didn't want to be labelled as anything. Labels were confusing and scary, why must I be straight, bisexual or gay? 

I just wanted to be Hunter Williams and nothing else.

I heard a muffled cough from the other side of the wall and instantly shut off my brain, this wasn't the time nor the place to ponder about myself. Soon, I heard a bed creaking, followed by footsteps and a door closing - Mr Featherhead was awake and I felt very anxious for some reason.

He must be having a shower right now, why else would he not show up for so long?

I decided this was an appropriate time to check what the time was right now, for all I knew, it could be four in the afternoon. I picked up my phone that rested on the coffee table a couple of feet away from the couch. My lock screen was flooded by various messages, twitter moments and people tagging me in memes, lovely. The clock read eleven-seventeen in the morning.

Good thing my sleeping schedule wouldn't suffer for my dumb actions at the party, the fact that my head was still banging didn't help - I was without a doubt hungover.

Suddenly, I saw Blake enter the open-view kitchen. It was not every day that you see your English teacher wearing nothing but a white towel around his waist. My eyes practically bulged out of their sockets before I managed to focus my attention anywhere else.

The view clearly did not help the vulnerable state I was in when it came to him. The man gulped down a glass of water before he realized that I sitting up on the couch, ripe as a tomato. "Oh, sorry for my indecency, thought that you would still be asleep." He chuckled, his voice husky.

I was not one to obsess over physical appearances, but the fact that my English teacher was beautiful really wasn't fair. His body was toned and well defined - he obviously put in a lot of work in the gym.

"Y-yeah, it's fine." I managed to cough out, trying to use my hangover to my advantage.

I knew that Mr Featherhead was going to be a farfetched fantasy, he was nine years older than me and was my teacher for god's sake. Besides, he probably thought I was some kind of a helpless child, that really didn't help my confidence.

One thing's certain - I didn't want to jeopardize our friendship because of my little, taboo crush. I liked hanging out and talking to him, despite the fact that he was literally my teacher. I knew I should be building friendships within my own age group, but I was convinced that Blake Carter was that type of a person that you never let go of, just like Evelyn.

"You alright? You look a little flushed, does your head hurt?" He questioned me, a puzzled, unreadable expression dancing on his face.

I nodded and winced in response, further pushing the hangover narrative. "Yes, Mr Featherhead," I grumbled, pushing his buttons a little.

He sighed in response and shook his head a little, a small smile visible from where I was situated. Blake opened a cabinet and rummaged through it a little before pulling out a box of aspirin. He filled a glass with water and headed over to me with a couple of pills in his hand. 

The situation was so, immeasurably risky. The fact that his towel could slip off at any moment was both intriguing and mortifying. He reached me after a few steps and handed me the pills and the glass of water. "Drink up, it's aspirin, will ease the pain." He instructed.

I complied and gulped the pills down - anything to get rid of this stupid headache.

"Do you want to eat anything?" Blake asked again, clearly trying to care for me, which I appreciated a lot.

Yes, you. "Uh, yeah, food would be nice." I shook the improper thoughts out of my head and responded.

I could see a droplet of water travelling down his chest, and suddenly, it felt difficult to breathe. Now that I acknowledged the feelings for Blake, which continued to excel forward, I was hyperaware of everything about him and it really didn't help ease the situation.

"Okay, I'll go get dressed and we'll go out somewhere. I still gotta scold you for drinking." Blake chuckled bitterly, before turning away from me.