❝I would rather walk with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light.❞

- Helen Keller.

[ H U N T E R   W I L L I A M S ]

I wasn't kidding when I said there was a very serious conversation on the way out of the oven with my best friend.

We were currently sitting back at Mugs' sipping on our coffee after a long day of classes. "So are we going to talk or just stare at each other awkwardly?" Evelyn spoke, stirring her coffee with a straw.

"I mean, what is there to even talk about?" I rolled my eyes, I knew damn well that there was a situation on our minds, but I didn't want to acknowledge it.

She sighed deeply and looked into my eyes, no longer playing with coffee. "I want an explanation, Hunter, we never talked about these kinds of things before. How did it even happen?"

"I don't know exactly how it happened, it just sort of did." I shrugged, pausing to take a sip. "Blake and I started meeting after school to work on my English, which by the way is paying off well, then we kinda became friends. I guess I was kind of in a vulnerable state when we started talking more often and I fell."

"You know, I teased you about this, but never in a million years would I have thought this would happen." She chuckled, I knew Evelyn wasn't mad or disappointed, she had no reason to be. She wanted answers and truthfully she deserved them because I hadn't been sharing much lately.

"How do you think I feel? I woke up in his apartment after having him pick me up from the police station, saw his one-night stand leaving and got super jealous." I chuckled bitterly, remembering the situation as if it happened an hour ago.

"He had a one-night stand?!" Evelyn's eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets, I wasn't sure why she was surprised though.

"I mean, yeah. It was his birthday, he went out clubbing and picked up a chick. Not all that surprising, the man is hot and you know it." I rolled my eyes at her. Not only was the man hot, but he was also caring, sweet and patient. I sighed dreamily.

"I guess you're right, you know sometimes I forget that teachers are people too. Just seems so weird thinking about your teacher railing somebody." Evelyn scrunched her face up in disgust and I nodded in response. I think it was the same with any kind of authorities in our lives, we didn't want to imagine that aspect of their lives just to maintain a good image.

"God, Evelyn what the hell am I going to do?" I suddenly exclaimed, burying my face in my hands. I wasn't in love with Blake Carter by any means, but I was already waist-deep and I didn't know how long I could keep pretending that I didn't want him.

"You know, I don't think you should be too quick to judge your feelings, you could just be having a little manic crush on him and nothing else. He supported you when times were tough, you began blossoming feelings - but that doesn't mean you're obliged to act them out." She halted her little monologue to sip on her caramel macchiato. "But if it is that big of an issue, maybe you should try to look for a distraction?" Eve suggested.

She did have a point, maybe it was just a crush that would be over in no time? I didn't know much when it came to feelings, I only ever dated and, I guess, loved Bailey. "What do you mean by a distraction? Should I just not hang out with him as much anymore? Wouldn't that be a little bit suspicious? I mean I already started acting weird around, it doesn't take that much to piece things together." I muttered, knowing that if I kept my behaviour up, Blake would understand what was going on.

"I don't mean that you should stop hanging out with him no, I think that maybe you should look for other potential love interests, though," Evelyn muttered. "I mean, there is plenty of fish in the sea, especially when you don't mind what they are. You know, I'm still surprised that you're finally accepting your true self."

"What do you mean 'finally' accepting myself true self. I've always been open-minded." I eyed her quizzically. 

"Yes, Hunt, you were always open-minded towards others, but not yourself. You still wanted to fit into the norm of being a straight football player, especially when you were with Bailey. You might have not understood it at the time, but it was painfully obvious, not only to me but everyone else in our group." Evelyn sort of did have a point, for a while, I just wanted to be like everyone, I didn't look for relationships, but Bailey sort of came along and with ushering from my teammates, I gave it a shot, never really considering if I wanted it for myself. Eve sighed. "I'm just happy that you're no longer trying to constrict yourself and that you're finally growing up as a person."

I nodded at her. "I guess you're right. I just sort of realized that life doesn't end with high school, everything keeps going on. I just want you to know one thing, I'm probably going to repeat it many times in the future - but I hate labels, I don't want to be called bi, or straight, or anything like that. So just keep that in mind." I smiled weakly at her, trying to push my point.

"I don't see a problem with that, just be true to yourself, you're Hunter Williams and you're good enough as you are. You don't need to be some kind of a perfect teenage movie character, that's just boring, honestly." Evelyn smiled at me. This is exactly why I wanted to keep people like Evelyn around me. Having someone looking out for you is something nobody should pass up.

"I get it, now, you mentioned I should seek distractions by dating other people?" I asked her and earned a nod from Evelyn, who was playing with her drink again. "But what if I happened to meet a guy and dated him while still talking to Blake, wouldn't that just be a dead giveaway that I was lusting for him?" I raised an eyebrow. Mr Featherhead wasn't stupid or oblivious, he could connect the dots if I suddenly had a gay outburst.

"I mean, not exactly? You just have to adjust the way you portray yourself to Mr Carter, you don't exactly want to act as you do now. Visibly giddy, swooning every single time he looks at you. I doubt that you want to give up your friendship with him, and I, as your best friend, don't want you to give it up either." She explained and I followed along.

"So you're saying, tone down the homosexuality and look at everything platonically?" I tried cracking a joke, a smile playing on my face.

Evelyn laughed in response and nodded. "Exactly, your goal is to maintain a valuable friendship, not potentially screw it up because of whoremones." She retorted, causing me to choke on my drink.

"What do I do during the ski trip though? I'm already dreading going there because of Blake, but I'm not gonna back out because I always wanted to go skiing." I grumbled. I wasn't going to let my little crush on my teacher stop me from having fun.

"Stick with Troy then. He doesn't get along that well with the other guys on the team - neither do you, so why not hang with him?" She suggested, before pausing. "I swear to god, don't make my new boyfriend your potential love interest or I will claw your face off." She smiled viciously and I chuckled. As handsome as Troy Beckett was, he was Evelyn's and I had no intentions of betraying her, especially after feeling betrayal myself.

I nodded at her suggestion, figured she was right, another friend wouldn't hurt. I just needed to survive that skiing trip without being fully submerged in my feelings.

Blake Carter, you will pay for this torture one day, I promised in my head.

The man was messing with my head and sometimes I did forget the fact that he was my teacher. I wish things were more simple than they were now. I didn't want Blake to be some kind of a guilty fantasy, but it was just the way it was. I could get over the dramatic nine-year age gap and the fact that he was married before. However, falling for your teacher is unacceptable and has so many consequences that I didn't want either of us to endure. Especially not when we blossomed an amazing friendship.

I'll get over my little, taboo crush. I must get over it. 

There was no room for any more trouble in my life and unfortunately, crushing on my advanced English literature teacher had 'trouble' written all over it.