Ellie didn’t talk until they reached the market. She sat there, trying to get over feeling silly and make herself feel sexy instead. Sexy and cool and interesting, like Mia seemed to think she was.

She texted the friend she’d been planning lunch with and said sorry, could they do it tomorrow please, then just sat there, looking out the window, watching the traffic, and not saying a thing.

Silent, because that seemed the way to be cool.

It seemed to be, except that halfway there she suddenly wondered if it was working. If whether, instead of sexy, she might just seem up herself and boring. Dull, with nothing to say. Whether Mia might already be changing her mind, sick of being stuck in a car with an unspeaking Ellie.

After that, Ellie sat there and worried. She didn’t know what to do. Whether she should try and start a conversation, suddenly start talking and try to make it better. Or whether cool was actually best, and very silent was somehow especially cool and sexy.

Mia wasn’t saying anything either. She was just watching the road and driving, and that decided Ellie. If Mia wasn’t going to talk, it seemed far too late for Ellie to start.

So she sat there, silently, worrying.

Once or twice, as they got close, Mia glanced over at her and smiled.

That was reassuring, and Ellie was grateful. Perhaps it was all right after all.

They arrived, and parked, still without talking.

Mia had bags. She gave Ellie some, a couple of big, reusable plastic supermarket bags, and they went inside.

The market was in an old warehouse, a large open space with a high metal roof, and small birds and wooden beams far above them. It was a warm morning, but the air inside was pleasantly cool and shady. It smelled nice, too, of food, and frying, and the sharp smell of coffee.

Mia started wandering around collecting things. She seemed to know what she needed, and to know her way around. She was going to particular stalls for particular things, and she seemed to vaguely know people. She asked how they were as if she actually meant it, and wasn’t just being polite.

Women, Ellie noticed. Mia knew mostly women.

As soon as she’d thought that she didn’t know why she cared.

Ellie followed Mia.

They still weren’t talking, but Ellie was starting to think that Mia didn’t mind. Mia was smiling at Ellie occasionally, grinning like she thought they were having fun, and didn’t especially need to talk. Maybe she did think that. Maybe she thought Ellie was mysterious, and quiet, and this was how Ellie liked to spend her time.

Actually, Ellie was just nervous.

She was nervous, and she wasn’t sure how everything had changed so that she was nervous around Mia, worried about what Mia thought, rather than being chased.

She wasn’t sure she liked that change.

Ellie couldn’t decide what was going on. They seemed to really just be shopping, for fruit and veges, and that seemed to be all. Not talking, not Mia flirting with Ellie. Just shopping.

Ellie wanted to think Mia’s silence was part of some complicated game, but she didn’t think so any more. She thought they were just shopping. Picking out fruit and vegetables together, mostly silently.

Ellie didn’t know why.

She felt bad. It seemed like her keeping quiet had put Mia off. Ellie had just been trying to be interesting, but now she thought she’d done it wrong because there wasn’t very much flirting going on. There weren’t even the intense stares Ellie thought had been there earlier. Just shopping. Ellie wanted Mia to stay interested, to keep wanting her. She didn’t want Mia thinking she was just sulky and rude and boringly quiet and losing interest.

She was scared that was what was happening.

Mia got a smoothie, and Ellie got coffee, and they talked while they were waiting. Talked about the market and what was there and how the food was good, and it was utterly banal and silly, and Ellie was almost glad when they went quiet again.

They went back to shopping. Mia was sipping her smoothie slowly, like she was savouring it. She went over to an orchard’s stall, picked up two apples, and stood in a queue to pay.

All without even seeming to notice Ellie.

Ellie followed, because she didn’t know what else to do. She got some apples too. More apples than Mia, five or six, piled into the crook of her arm and against her side. She might as well while she was here. She should spent some time thinking about food, instead of Mia.

She went and stood in the queue behind Mia, and tried to decide what else she needed while she waited.

Waited behind Mia, watching her.

She got distracted.

She realized she was probably standing too close to Mia, but decided she didn’t care.

Mia’s back was turned. She was looking the other way. Ellie liked that. She didn’t get much time to stare at Mia, because Mia always seemed to be watching her.

She stared. She stared carefully.

Mia’s hair was all twisted up into a clip at the back of her head. It looked completely casual and impulsive, except that standing there, Ellie decided it wasn’t. Each little bit of hair was just a little too perfectly dishevelled. Each twist was just so.

That was interesting, Ellie thought. That Mia was playing little games with herself just like Ellie was. Spending ages making herself look casual, and succeeding, almost.

It probably meant something, that she was taking that time.

Mia had a nice neck, Ellie decided. She had bare arms, and nice shoulders, and she smelled good.

Ellie realized she must be standing really close, far too close, if she could smell Mia. It was Mia, though. Not someone else. Not fruit, or tasty food. Ellie knew it was Mia, because she’d breathed in the smell of Mia before. The actual smell of her, warm and fresh and nothing to do with any scent she was wearing. The her, underneath her scent. A smell a little like olive oil, and a little like honey, with the giddy thickness of fresh orange blossom on a very hot day, and the tingly part of a watermelon smell too.

Ellie know how Mia smelled, and she liked it. She liked it a lot.

She knew exactly how Mia smelled, and suddenly she was miserable. She didn’t want to think too much about how she knew, while standing here in the farmer’s market, in the middle of a crowd, perhaps losing Mia’s interest for good.

Mia was still sipping the smoothie. Ellie watched that instead. Each time Mia lifted the cup up, and moved her arm, Ellie could see muscles tightening and flexing.

Ellie liked that.

It was a nice thing to be looking at. A nice way to spend the morning.

If only she wasn’t losing Mia’s interest, without even meaning to.

Mia got to the front of the queue, and paid, and turned around suddenly, and bumped into Ellie.

She bumped into Ellie because Ellie was standing too close. Because Ellie was daydreaming about Mia, and watching Mia’s arm, and not paying attention to what was going on.

Mia bumped into Ellie, and Ellie dropped all the apples she was holding, and then she felt something cold and wet on her chest.

Mia’s smoothie. The cup had popped open when Mia hit Ellie, and spilled all down Ellie’s front.

Ellie stood there, startled.

She looked down. None of the smoothie was on Mia, which didn’t seem fair. It was all on Ellie.

She didn’t know what to say. She just stood there looking at Mia.