Chapter Twenty Two

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"You what?!" I asked her, astonished. She just nodded her head with a scared expression. "Holy shit.."

"How- why, when?" I was still taken aback as hell.

"A few days ago," she fiddled with her hands. My eyes stayed wide, I didn't really know how to react.

"Well damn," I mumbled, "How long have you guys been like, a thing?"

"Well, actually, we've only kissed once.." she trailed off.

"Wait a damn minute... are you telling me that you two did the deed on your first kiss??" I asked, taken aback.

"Yeah," she answered, slightly embarrassed, "I guess our feelings were pretty damn pent up.. we both had probably already fantasized about it and whatnot."

"Huh," I nodded, still not knowing how to react. "I, uh, wow."

Well I didn't expect to be finding this out tonight..

"So I uh, I told you for a reason, not just to dump it on you," she started, not finding whatever she was about to say to be easy, "while I was in foster care, I, um, had some shit happen to me and I'm finding it hard to get over it and, as you can tell, this situation I've just gotten myself into with Eli is already very sticky and I feel like I'm gonna mess it up even more," she vented. I just continued to listen.

"What happened?" I asked, and she looked up at me, a sadness in her eyes that I had never seen with her. There was a while of silence before she answered timidly.

"Um.. I was raped," she said quietly, "wow, I've never said that out loud before," she added and I noticed her hands shaking a little bit. My heart sunk and I immediately took her hands in mine as she looked down.

"Layla I am so so sorry. No one deserves that, especially not you," I said and she shrugged.

"I've mainly gotten over it, it's usually somewhat easy to forget when you distract yourself every day and whatnot... I just, I don't know," she sighed, "I can't help but feel like it's going to get in the way of this, and I don't want that. Not at all."

"Well, what makes you think that it will?" I asked.

"I don't know, like, when I was dating Justin one of the reasons he decided to become an absolute dirtbag and cheat on me was because I wouldn't sleep with him. I would get close or whatever but when it came down to it I never was able to get over the flashbacks," she explained.

"So um, Eli didn't, like, make you feel like you had to do anything, right?" The question came out pretty scrambled, the thought a little too uncomfortable to think about.

"No- no oh god no! It wasn't like that at all," she replied, and I let out a little breath of relief, "and I mean, It was the best I've ever felt, if I'm being honest.." she added and I chuckled a little bit.

"I think that we're good for each other," she told me, "I feel like in a weird way we complete each other, you know? We each have our own baggage but when we're together it just feels so much lighter," she told me. As she was talking I realized that she was feeling pretty much the same way I had when I first started really liking Ashton.. and thank God I didn't let my past get in the way of that.

"I think you guys are good for each other, too," I offered her a small smile. I mean, yes Eli didn't have the best history when it came to girls, but something about him and Layla just sat so right.

That could just be the hopeless romantic in me, though... hard to tell.

"I'm scared about Ashton, though," she confessed and I nodded, understanding why she would be worried.

"Yeah.." I agreed, not wanting to sugarcoat it.

"He's gonna feel like he lost his best friend. Or his sister- again. Or both of us," she sighed and looked up at the ceiling. "Not to mention the inevitable ass-beating he'll do to Eli."

"Well, that might not be the case. He's definitely changed for the better over this last year. I mean, in the end of the day he can't tell you or Eli what to do, so he's just gonna have to put on his big-boy-pants and grow up about it," I tried to reason with her, "and I'll always be there to help deescalate the situation, if need be," I added and she smiled at me.

"Thank you for that," she said.

"Of course," I replied. "And uh, about what you said happened to you in foster care-"

"I, uh, don't really feel like talking about it.. sorry," she cut me off, looking back down.

"Don't be sorry- I was just going to tell you that your secrets are more than safe with me, and that I'm always here for you whether you want to talk or not talk," I responded with a kind smile, and she looked to have some tears in her eyes when she looked back up at me.

"Not to get weird or scare you off or anything.. but you're the only person who's ever said anything like that to me," she told me with a smile, and then we heard Eli's car pull into the driveway. "Oh, can you not tell Eli I told you- I'd rather tell him myself once some of the dust has settled, you know?"

"Yeah- yeah totally," I assured her, "besides, it'll be fun to watch him squirm every time I walk into a room you guys are in," I joked and she chuckled as the front door opened and Eli walked in holding a bag from the store.

"I didn't miss much, did I?" Eli asked casually as he made his way over to the table in front of us, placing the bag down.

"Nope," Layla answered, and we smiled at each other.

"Alright, so, I got some shit for our little rebel over here," Eli gestured to me and I did a small bow while Layla chuckled.

"Oh shit! I should've asked you to get more Pop Tarts," Layla thought out loud and grunted. I saw Eli smile and laugh to himself as he took stuff out of the bag, which made me smile to myself. They were cute.

"Okay Rocky, give me that hand," Eli said to me and I held my hand out to him, looking back up at Layla.

"So where's Jake tonight?" I asked her as Eli started securing the ice onto my knuckles. I cringed at the freezing cold on my tender skin.

"He's actually staying at a friends house tonight- he gets sick of me from time to time," she told me with a chuckle and I nodded. Then I finally realized something.

Oh.. oh wait... they were planning on performing some shenanigans tonight, weren't they..

And I had the audacity to spoil it. Ugh.

"There ya go," Eli told me when he finished, "this is some of my best work."

"Well thanks doc," I joked, bringing my hand back and observing his 'work'.

"Actually, so um, I forgot I have a class tomorrow morning so I think I'm gonna go back to my dorm," I told them, not wanting to intrude on their little scandal.

"Oh- are you sure?? You can totally crash here no question," Layla assured me, but I shook my head.

"Yeah, I'm sure, I'll let you two nerds get back to your calc," I held back a mischievous smile and instead flashed a nice one. "Thanks for the first aid," I said to Eli.

"Anytime," he replied, "oh and take that off in like 20 minutes."

"Sure thing," I replied and leaned over to give Layla a hug goodbye. "I'll see you guys later. Tell Jake I said hi."

After I hugged Eli and we said goodbye, I grabbed the clothes I had arrived in and headed out the door. It was pretty chilly out, and I had taken a pair of Ashton's sweatpants and a T-shirt, so my arms were kind of cold. Once I jogged to my car, I threw my clothes onto the passenger's seat and started it.

Something about going back to my dorm just didn't sit so right with me. Once I was in my dorm, that would be one thing. But I would have to drive into the campus, park outside my building, and walk in. There were too many spaces in there for bad things to happen.

After a few moments of consideration, I decided to call Ashton and see where he was at.

"Hey," he answered, sounding sleepy.

"Hey, sorry did I wake you?" I replied, letting a small smile spread on my face at the sound of his voice.

"Maybe.. but I'd rather hear your voice than sleep, anyway," he told me, and I chuckled.

"Okay I definitely woke you up.. you're at your cheesiest when you're tired," I said, and he let out a light laugh that made me smile even harder.

Just picturing his dimples when he'd smile and how his eyebrows would slightly draw together when he'd laugh made my heart feel so warm. I imagined his hand in mine, and the beating of his heart, and I felt transported into a peaceful serenity.

That's one of the weird things about love. You go throughout your day knowing that you love someone, but then once in a while it hits you in it's full glory and all you can think about is how much you genuinely LOVE that person. It's a euphoric feeling; so rare yet so infinite.

"So you're in your dorm?" I asked him, keeping the smile on my face and pushing my other thoughts aside.

"Yup, and you got to my house okay?" He asked.

"Yeah I did," I replied, "hey don't go anywhere, okay?"

"Uh, metaphorically or literally?" He questioned, and I chuckled.

"Both, preferably," I answered, "just stay in your dorm, I have a suprise."

"And what's the surprise?"

"Well if I told you than it wouldn't be a surprise, dumbass," I replied and he chuckled.

"You have the sweetest nicknames for me," he said and I grinned.

"You haven't even seen your contact name yet, which is surprising," I told him with a chuckle of my own

"Why- whats my contact name?"

"Byeee," I replied and laughed, hanging up. I could picture his frustrated face on the other end when I hung up, and this made me laugh again as I started driving.

I took the stuff off my knuckles around when Eli told me to, and I listened to some calm music on the way there. My wallet sure was hurting after all this gas I was using, but in the end of the day I'd rather have a night spent with the love of my life than the extra money in my pocket.

When I finally arrived at his dorm building, I parked and smiled softly to myself in anticipation of seeing him. I really needed him right now.

I wasn't able to go into the building, since I didn't have a student ID card to scan and it was after hours, so I had to call him to come let me in. When I saw him coming towards me through the glass doors, I smiled at him.

As soon as he opened the door for me he brought me into a warm hug, and I hugged him back tightly. I always felt so protected inside his arms. It felt like I hadn't seen him in centuries for some reason. He rubbed my arms as he pulled away from the hug.

"I normally hate surprises but this one's won my heart," he told me and I chuckled.

"Told you you're cheesiest when you're tired," I grinned up at him, putting my right hand on the side of his face and kissing him.

He kissed me back, and we pulled away after a few moments. He took my hands, presumably to hold them, and I couldn't help but wince when he touched my raw knuckles. His eyes flashed me some concern before he looked down at my knuckles and his jaw dropped a little.

"Holy shit, C," he said, bringing my hand up closer to him so that he could look at it. I gently pulled my hand away from him, sending him a reassuring smile.

"I'm fine, really," I told him, but he didn't seem to buy it. I didn't know if I bought it, either.

"Look at you kicking ass," he said as we started walked towards the elevator, nudging me with his shoulder. I laughed.

"I definitely let him have it," I said, thinking back to when I was letting myself go way to far- before I got pulled off of him, that is.

"That's my girl," he replied proudly and slung his arm around my shoulders. I smiled and held onto his arm as we stepped off onto his floor.

"Nice outfit, by the way," he complimented me, and I looked up at him, biting back a laugh.

"Why thank you, I got it from my favorite store- my boyfriend," I responded and he chuckled.

"Well, it looks great on you," he told me and I couldn't help but blush and give him a kiss on the cheek.

We stayed quiet when we got back to his dorm, not wanting to wake Trevor up. Once we were in his bed all cozy together, he spoke softly to me.

"I love you," I heard his low voice say, and I smiled against his chest.

"And I love you," I replied, getting even closer to him.

It was still crazy to me how much better Ashton could make me feel just by being near me.. it never ceased to amaze me.

I felt so warm and bubbly, even as I drifted into a peaceful, safe sleep. And I tried my best not to think about all the shit I was going to have to deal with after this sleep.

• • •

Hey guys!

Hope you're all feeling healthy and happy :) if not, then here let me give you a hug: **digitial hug**

QOTD: What is your favorite thing to spread on toast?

>>> avocado toast is the love of my life, some classic butter is good too though.

Be safe and wash yo goddamn hands!

Stay beautiful,
Briella<3

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