rustycol | Liu Yao - Chapter 66

rustycol.dreamwidth.org

Thanks to MrMrsMissRandom for editing and InkSplatterM for English help!

The hidden injuries on Yan Zhengming haven’t completely healed yet. As he is startled like that, his energy flow gets stuck, causing him to cough his lungs out. 

Cheng Qian seriously looks at his most senior brother, who is shaking like a flower in the rain. He feels that there is nothing that should be hidden about this, so he continues, “Han Yuan said your demon of the heart was something I wouldn’t dare to know. Thinking about it, I find there is no reason I should be afraid to learn about it. Even if you intend to rebel against our Master and the seniors before him, well, none of them is still around for you to wage your immoral rebellion on. You should just say it out loud. Maybe it’ll help you.”

He is such an adorable blockhead...

Hearing these righteous words, Yan Zhengming feels even more cornered. He gloomily glances at Cheng Qian with a sorrowful face. Staring at that honest, straightforward face for a moment, Yan Zhengming tiredly waves his hand and says, “Scram!”

The sweet words in his imagination are truly imaginary. Yan Zhengming realises that, in the brutal reality, all he says to Cheng Qian is just “scram”. 

Cheng Qian frowns, as he can’t discern the cause of this unreasonable bout of temper. He keeps his own feelings under control and patiently explains. “Most senior brother, even the mortals, who are preoccupied with living from day to day, may have moments when they are bothered by something. So, it isn’t strange for those who are on the long path of cultivation like us to momentarily get stuck.”

“There really isn’t nothing. Basically there is nothing. Did I say that there is something?” Because he has been having indecent thoughts, Yan Zhengming’s shame turns into anger, and he lets out a string of mocking words at Cheng Qian. Having said that, he himself feels that his anger is too unreasonable, so he gathers his determination and pushes it to the end. “I won’t tell you. Stay away!”

Cheng Qian: “…”

Under his uncomprehending gaze, Yan Zhengming gets even angrier. He stares at Cheng Qian for a long while, imagining himself pull Cheng Qian in and yell into his ears: “Can’t you leave it? My demon of the heart is you, you asshole.” 

Unfortunately, he only dares to imagine that. On the outside, Yan Zhengming sits very still like he were frozen, but inside, he undergoes great upheavals, as his heart jumps up and down like a monkey.

In the end, he strikes the monkey in his heart dead. Being a paragon of rationality, he chooses the ‘out of sight out of mind’ approach, and turns away from Cheng Qian. 

After an unimaginably short talk and an unimaginably long struggle, Yan Zhengming plans to resume the cold war.

Cheng Qian falls silent. Then he suddenly smiles. “Fine, I won’t ask anymore. In any case, you look fine to me.”

Yan Zhengming glances at him. 

Cheng Qian says, “Someone who can find ways to enjoy himself in any circumstance like you…”

Seeing as a storm is forming on his sect leader and senior brother’s face again, as if he is about to discipline him, Cheng Qian finds his tact for once in his life. 

Complaining to himself that this Noble Consort’s temper keeps getting more difficult to deal with, he takes out a small baton from his sleeve. As he opens his palm, the “baton” becomes larger and turns into a richly decorated sword. It’s none other than the sword the lord of the valley Nian Mingming gifted him when they parted.

Cheng Qian hands the sword to Yan Zhengming, and says with a rare attempt at flattery, “Didn’t your sword break? Why don’t you use this sword for now? Although it doesn’t look nice, the quality is still high. Keep it until I find a better sword for you.”

Yan Zhengming gives the sword a glance. He immediately keeps a wide berth from it with obvious annoyance. “Put it away. What an eyesore.”

It’s indeed hard on the eye. Even if his offer is thus spurned, Cheng Qian doesn’t mind. His most senior brother has been a pampered rich lord for many years, so he is at a high level. It’s natural that he takes issue with this crude nouveau riche thing.

Cheng Qian smiles, “How about me gifting you Shuang Ren?”

Hearing that, Yan Zhengming is dazed. Whoever learns swordplay can’t help being seduced by that famous sword shrouded in ice, even if it has the unlucky title of “the sword of terrible death”. However, Yan Zhengming feels nothing for it. All these years, Shuang Ren only brought him the memories about its owner. Therefore, whenever he saw it, he would feel grief instead of greed. 

Fixing a strange gaze on Cheng Qian, Yan Zhengming asks, “You won’t grudge me even Shuang Ren?”

True to his words, Cheng Qian tosses him Shuang Ren. “Take it.”

As soon as Yan Zhengming unsheathes the sword, the frosty aura from the blade flies in his face. His bleak mood immediately brightens up, and he can’t help a faint smile on his lips. However, before the smile properly blooms, Yan Zhengming recalls the past, when Shuang Ren was like a lifeline for Cheng Qian. 

Yan Zhengming feels a bit shocked. “He can really give me whatever I demand from him so easily like that?”

As soon as this bittersweet thought flashes in his mind, Yan Zhengming’s eyes become dull.

After what he has seen of Tong Ru in the sect leader seal and the consequences of the man’s actions, Yan Zhengming has very complicated feelings about his prodigal disciple grandfather, especially when he learns that Tong Ru had inappropriate feelings for his Master. On the one hand, Yan Zhengming has some sympathy for Tong Ru because they face the same problem. On the other hand, he dumps part of his self-hatred on to Tong Ru. Although he knows that it’s unreasonable to lash out at the previous generation, but he doesn’t know how to suppress it. 

If Cheng Qian were of the previous generation of the sect or his senior brother, Yan Zhengming would feel much more comfortable about it. His feelings are totally sincere, so at most he would feel like he were committing a little rebellion. Maybe he would even impulsively glue himself to Cheng Qian. If he were expelled from the sect, it would be even better, as the taboo wouldn’t apply anymore.    

Unfortunately, that isn’t the case. Cheng Qian is his junior brother, whom he has taken care of since their childhood. Their positions are the opposite of the above scenario, so everything is different. However sincere his feelings are, they all become improper thoughts he shouldn’t harbour. As the sect leader, he must not lead his junior brother on the wrong path. He can’t express his feelings, as no matter how deep they are, they are inevitably tainted by impropriety and indecency.   

“Do I deserve that?” Full of self-hatred, Yan Zhengming rebukes himself internally. Without a word, he returns Shuang Ren to Cheng Qian. Then, seeing as Tang Zhen and the others have completed the protective array, he silently gets inside the half-collapsed shrine.

Being left behind, Cheng Qian feels a headache rising, thinking that his most senior brother is impossible to please anymore.

Nian Dada, who has been hiding in the shrine ruin, eagerly approaches Yan Zhengming as soon as he gets in. “Senior!” 

Back then, dumped by Cheng Qian, on top of Liu Lang needing urgent help, he had no other choice than returning to Mingming Valley. Trying his best to cook up a convincing story for his father, he lied without batting an eyelash that “Elder Cheng wishes to recruit me to be his disciple, so I have to follow him and start my training”. After much trouble, he was allowed to leave Mingming Valley again, and became an errand runner for Tang Zhen.

Although he lied to his father, Nian Dada indeed doesn’t give up the intention to become Cheng Qian’s disciple. After witnessing the great battle of Fuyao Sect, his unwillingness to give up seems to transform into a great desire. Thus, he immediately moves to flatter his future senior uncle. “I’m Nian Dada, from Mingming Valley. Greetings to you, Senior.”

Deep in his self-hatred, Yan Zhengming tiredly glances at Nian Dada. Thus, his first impression of the sod is quickly formed. 

“When the dog gets in the way, the father is sick,” He thinks. 

Seeing that the gaze of this future senior uncle isn’t friendly at all, which is so different from Cheng Qian’s description, Nian Dada tries to encourage himself. “Most of great cultivators from previous generations have unusual personalities. Let’s not think about it too much. As long as I stick to them no matter what, my patience will be rewarded. I’ll definitely be a great cultivator in the future!”

Yan Zhengming pays no attention to him. Nian Dada immediately brings up the time he stayed with Cheng Qian. Even if the other person isn’t listening, he keeps talking on and on, from how he worships ‘Elder Cheng’, to how he sneaked away from the Valley and stalked Cheng Qian, how he brazenly stuck to Cheng Qian’s side, as well as how he did everything to travel with Tang Zhen. As Yan Zhengming listens, his eyes twitch non-stop. Anger erupts in his heart, as he suspects this bastard has ill intentions about Cheng Qian.

Because Yan Zhengming thinks of himself as having improper thoughts, he comes to suspect the whole world. He stops and looks in the other’s direction. Not caring that he is using his position as a senior to bully a junior, he projects all of his sword cultivator’s aura without holding back, and mercilessly starts an interrogation. “What kind of conspiracy are you planning about my junior brother?” 

Nian Dada: “…”

Nian Dada wants to express his heart that he will do his best to improve himself in the future, and that he will be filial to his seniors-to-be. Unfortunately, he is so terrified that he can’t even look up. His legs shaking, he can’t manage a single word. 

Yan Zhengming shouts, “Speak!”

Nian Dada cries a river inside. This is the first time he meets a sword cultivator in the flesh, and he feels he doesn’t want to encounter a second one. Sword cultivators are scary!

The commotion finally reaches Li Yun, who has been talking with Tang Zhen. Complaining ‘how embarrassing’ in his heart, he hastily approaches his most senior brother, who has been scaring the junior cultivator to the point of nearly peeing in his pants. On one hand, he reassures Nian Dada. “So many things happen to our sect recently, so our leader has been in a bad mood. Please don’t mind him.” 

On the other hand, he tiredly pulls Yan Zhengming to one side. “What’s wrong with you?”

Being pulled by him, Yan Zhengming immediately calms down. He realises himself that he has been overreacting. He opens his mouth, but is at a loss. 

Having a good look at his face, Li Yun is suddenly shaken. Since their childhood, their most senior brother has always favoured Cheng Qian. Furthermore, after a long period of going missing, Cheng Qian is pampered like a treasure by their sect leader and senior brother. Although Li Yun regularly teases them for that, it’s just for fun. He has never really thought deeply about it. 

Li Yun says, “You…”

Unwilling to talk much, Yan Zhengming turns and wears a casual face like nothing has happened. As if itching to escape something, he starts a conversation with Tang Zhen. “Senior Tang, I’ve heard from Xiao-Qian that we owe you a debt that can’t be repaid for saving his life.” 

The two of them immediately start a very courteous exchange. When dealing with outsiders, Yan Zhengming looks every bit a sect leader, who can read the other side and act accordingly. No one can tell that he has the bad habit of acting like a spoiled lordling to his sect. 

As outsiders are present, Li Yun reluctantly pushes aside the disquiet doubts in his heart and asks Tang Zhen, “Tang-Daoyu, for you to travel all the way to Nanjiang, you must have some important business? Maybe we can be of help for you?”

Tang Zhen says casually, “My young friend Cheng Qian must have told you about my situation. Although my body is already dead, my soul is still here. My primordial spirit has no shelter, and I don’t want to perform the immoral technique of robbing someone else’s body. So, I have no other choice but to find the bodies of newly dead mortals and forge them into flesh puppets I can use. Such flesh puppets don’t last long, and I can’t always find suitable bodies. A few years ago, I took the opportunity of the war and collected a few of those, but they don’t last long, so I make the effort to travel to Nanjiang to look for the Ice-hearted Fire. Unfortunately, I ran into that dragon.”

After a pause, Tang Zhen continues with a rueful smile. “I can still remember having the pleasure of meeting your sect’s Han Yuan-Daoyu once before. Back then, he was still a child who couldn’t sense the qi yet. Life is indeed…”

After a moment of silence, Yan Zhengming says, “Back then, that degenerate disciple of our sect had low cultivation, so he fell to the ‘drawing on soul’ spell of a villain. Then, for whatever reason, he has ended up with two souls in his body. Half of his self is possessed by a demonic being. It’s embarrassing to say this, but his own soul has been suppressed by that demonic being. Had it not been for our little sister waking up his true self, I’m afraid today we would all die to the combination of demonic dragon and heavenly tribulation.”

No one here is naive. They can all discern Yan Zhengming’s protective intent. With those words, he blames every terrible thing Han Yuan committed on the ‘unknown demonic being that possesses him’. It is likely he plans to accept Han Yuan back.

Although Tang Zhen and Tang Wanqiu were disciples of the same sect, they have opposite temperaments. Tang Zhen is very good at reading the mood. As soon as Yan Zhengming says that, he grasps the underlying intention and says, “Oh? That is the reason? But if it’s the case, I have a solution. I’m not much use for other things, but issues related to the soul is my field.”

Li Yun hastens to say, “Please tell us.”

Tang Zhen says, “Two souls in a body. You certainly want to get rid of one of them, but are afraid of throwing the baby along with the bathwater, am I right? In my possession there is an artifact called the ‘Soul Pulling Thread’, which can lead the primordial spirit of a person into the spiritual base of another person. Then, you can find a way to protect the primordial spirit of your sect member and eliminate the demonic being in there.”

Initially, Yan Zhengming only treats him with rather empty courtesy. Hearing this, he can’t help being moved. He carefully suppresses his impatience and says politely, “Tang-xiong, our sect’s members keep receiving favours from you. Indeed…” 

Tang Zhen isn’t a person who gives empty promises. If he says it, he really means to lend them that artifact. Otherwise, he’d keep silent.

Cheng Qian, who has walked in without anyone seeing, says as he hears that, “Nanjiang hasn’t been quiet recently. It can be dangerous for you and these kids to travel there. My senior brothers have to follow our Fourth Brother… How about this? If it isn’t too much of a trouble for you, I’ll accompany you to look for the Ice-hearted Fire.”

He is far from being a trouble. The Vermilion Bird Tower has collapsed. A demonic dragon has risen. The demonic cultivators in Nanjiang and the powerful factions from all corners of the world are in a state of unrest. Although Tang Zhen is very knowledgeable, he is physically frail. Of his two companions, Liu Lang is still a teenager and hasn’t properly entered the Tao, while Nian Dada doesn’t know anything about the outside world. They basically can’t be relied on. To have Cheng Qian as a protector is obviously a great boon for Tang Zhen.

Cheng Qian is trying to repay the honour debt on behalf of his sect. 

Hearing such decisive words, Yan Zhengming’s first reaction is to oppose. He absolutely doesn’t want Cheng Qian to get out of his sight anymore. However, he swallows his objection, which is already on the tip of his tongue. 

“Can I really keep him by my side this whole life?” Yan Zhengming thinks to himself. He quietly takes stock of the ridiculous things he has done recently, as well as these indecent thoughts that have been getting out of control. Suddenly, he finds that it isn’t a bad idea to let Cheng Qian go for a while. 

Cheng Qian is a reasonable person who very rarely starts a fight. His cultivation has progressed a lot compared to the past too...

As the hesitation passes by Yan Zhengming’s face, Tang Zhen immediately catches it.

Tang Zhen tactfully smiles. “My young friend, please don’t be like that. Standing on such ceremony would make us strangers. Fuyao Sect and I go way back. When I was still young and ignorant, I travelled the world with a junior sister from my sect. During the trip, I caused trouble and nearly lost my life. Fortunately, Senior Tong from your esteemed sect helped us. I stayed at Fuyao Mountain to recover from my injuries for a while, so I’ve met your Master too. Until now, I’ve lost count of who is in debt of whom. My abilities are limited, so I can only help you with trivial things. No need to repay me.”   

After the earlier panic, Li Yun’s hands sweat, as he tensely looks at Yan Zhengming, as if they weren’t discussing the rather trivial matter of whether Cheng Qian should accompany Tang Zhen, but the choice between right and wrong of his senior brother. 

Meeting his eyes, Yan Zhengming’s heart drops into a pool of acid.

Avoiding everyone’s eyes, he replies with his gaze on the ground. “Daoyu, you’ve done Xiao-Qian so many favours all this time, he should help you back a little. Even if you like the sword in his hand, there is no reason to refuse.”

After Yan Zhengming says this much, it would be rude for Tang Zhen to refuse. The group rests in nameless half-collapsed shrine. Three days later, Puddle finally wakes up, so Tang Zhen has no reason to delay further. Before Cheng Qian can see what difference the extra bit of Puddle’s yao skeleton makes, he has to depart with Tang Zhen’s group. 

Yan Zhengming has many things to say. However, running them through his mind, he feels that they’re all shameful, so he lets them all rot in his heart and says succinctly to Cheng Qian with a wave of his hand. “Go.” 

In a contrast, Cheng Qian doesn’t have the heart to take his leave. Having told his senior brothers and little sister to take care again and again, he still lingers on. In the end, he sighs, “If only there were some kind of artifact to teleport me to you guys when something happens.”

This line sways Yan Zhengming’s heart, making him nearly change his mind on the spot. He has to use all of his discipline for a lifetime, and pretends to be impatient to Cheng Qian. “Fine, fine, you’re the only capable one around here and are needed everywhere. Go, quickly. Stop wasting time of other people and being an eyesore."

Having said that, Yan Zhengming picks up the shards of his heart, then determinedly turns away first.

Under the vast sky, which place would complete him? And which place can he leave behind?

rustycol | Liu Yao - Chapter 67

rustycol.dreamwidth.org

Thanks MrMissMrsRandom for editing!

Warning for gore, torture, and rape and general demonic shenanigans.

*******

Cheng Qian frowns the entire time he watches Yan Zhengming and the others leave, until they can’t be seen any more. 

His habit is that he only talks about the good things and keeps quiet about the bad.