"Yeah I fucking did it so what?" Micah sneers at me in repeat, and I became disgusted. "I hurt lots of people and I still do as we speak. There's nothing I can't do and with all the crazy shit I've done, Malakai is taking up for it. He needs to, and he wants to at this point. He fuckin' hates the real world. In there, he's something because he made himself be somebody. Out here, he was not a 'somebody', he was 'that dick' or 'Micah's brother'.

"Someone like you won't make a difference because prison is his life now. He doesn't want to leave and he knows him being there is the only way I'll truly love him. I don't love many people, but I love him for this. Isn't that the best part out of all of this? He finally gets my love and appreciation? I think so-."

I sock him in the face, and I saw Worth rush from the food court towards me. Except I didn't care as I saw Micah come at me too and I dodged his punch, pushing him down to the ground.

My fists connecting with his face and I was so angry. How he could speak this way and have no shame. After hearing this...I really was going to turn in those recordings now.

I was going to wait it out, but I can't anymore.

I fucking...can't.

"Nate stop!" Worth shouts at me, lifting me off his brother as I wasn't fucking done.

I saw Micah get up fast and rush at me, only for Worth to twist me around so that Micah went for his back. I could hear the fists hitting Worth's back as he had me turned away.

My anger rising the more Micah was just punching him.

"Stop protecting him! Fuckin' move Malakai! Now, you useless son of a bitch! Listen to me!" Micah still hit him and now we were hearing people try to stop him from hitting Worth now.

I pulled from Worth as I see him twist back to face Micah, shaking his head.

"I'm not useless, and what the fuck did I say about calling anyone a bitch, huh?" Worth raises his voice and I saw Micah snort. "What's so funny? I'm not that little kid anymore where you can beat me up for the fun of it or take your anger out on me. I can fight back now, and you gave me a reason now for calling me a bitch. Those are fighting words, remember?"

"What the fuck are you tal-?"

Worth's fist flies at his face and that fist alone had Micah falling to the ground. Except he was clearly passed out now as people looked at us.

Only for me to grab Worth's hand and just run out. I didn't want them seeing him like that. When we got out the place we go into the car. My knuckles were bruised from having hit Micah so hard, but I didn't care.

Except I saw Worth's fingers run over my bruises. He looked at them sadly and I don't say anything.

"What...did he say to make you so angry?"

"It doesn't fucking matter." I snap, but I was more snapping at his brother if anything. I didn't want...Worth to hear all of that.

His brother being a bitch...talking about him in such a way? I can't...let him hear that mess. I can't be the one to tell him that mess either.

It's horrible, one hundred percent...just horrible.

"I know...you're not prone to just socking people in the face. That was a good right hook too, but I just want to know what made you so angry. I know he probably said some fucked up shit."

"He did, so let's just end that conversation there. You know he said some dumb shit, why ask for the specifics. It'll only hurt you anyway...do you want to be hurt?" I look him in the eyes, and saw him grin awkwardly.

"My feelings aren't easily hurt, it's fine. I would rather know...then have to assume, you know?"

"No." I snort, angry that he really wanted to know the bullshit that came out of Micah's mouth. "I can't do that to-."

I see him press a kiss to my lips, and I already knew he was just trying to kiss my anger away. I let him do so despite the fact that I was still irritated. Nothing could distract me from my absolute hatred and disdain towards his older brother. That feeling...will never change, ever.

"I know he's a pain in the ass...but you are aware he's said lots of crazy shit to me when I was a kid. I bet what he said in there is nothing compared to what he has said-."

"No." I interrupt in disbelief to him wanting to know so much.

Everyone's told him he has no feelings, and I think even he has come to believe that lie. Based on how he reacts when it pertains to even possibly giving away the idea of his brother avoiding jail, he is deeply in his feelings. Feelings of anger and rage, that is.

Still something.

"You think they'll call the police?" Worth asks, and I look at him. I saw him snort because he remembered who he sat beside. "I don't know, you're not a cop though. You can't go out and arrest people, handle the stuff that makes people hate you. You're hated on the inside, on the outside, no one really cares for you-."

"I get it." I interrupt, shaking my head since he had to be so descriptive; and for what? I already know that being a CO is the lowest rank you can have in terms of policing. Except I did that purposely for a reason. Rank means nothing, though I sure wish I had it with all the idiots I've dealt with.

Now I was thinking when I was going to really turn this shit in. Micah's words pissed me off to the point that I want him in, now. I just know I'm doing so it might...

I look at Worth, and I saw him already looking at me. My eyes lower now because I already knew that when I turned it in...it'd change everything. Especially between him and I since he's definitely...one-hundred percent, willing to take the fall for Micah's shit.

Just that thought...his anger and betrayal towards me... I can't have it. And I know I'll lose what him and I share possibly...no, probably.

"Nate-?"

I lean towards him fast, pressing a urgent kiss to his lips. I could tell that that was surprising to him just based on how stunned he looked initially. Until I pull back some, looking into his eyes.

If I was...going to possibly lose him because of me just trying to help him out of a bad situation... I want to feel all the love he has for me right now...before it's gone. I shouldn't say before it's gone, it probably won't be the same though.

That look in his eyes...that absolute devotion for me. To think it'll cease to exist all because I want to help him out of that hell hole?

"I...I do want to do it with you Worth." I end up telling him, and he frowns.

"Where is this coming from out of literally nowhere?" He asks me, but I shake my head because the less I told him the better at this point. "What did he say that is making you act this way-?"

"It's not about Micah's ugly ass, okay?" I exclaim in frustration, taking his face in my hands. "I just...have felt this way for some time and I...don't feel like going to work. No...I'm sorry."

I apologize, pulling back some as I see him wait for the truth. I...couldn't give him that just yet. No way...

"I...I have no shame," I clear my throat, gripping the steering wheel as I shook my head, "Just saying that out of nowhere after what just happened? I look like a freak, huh?"

Worth shook his head, his eyes diverting forward as he looked bemused. He actually looked...what's the word?

"Not a freak, not a freak at all," He breathes, and he looked at me now, "You saying that brings me back to when I was younger when...when I wanted to be with you first. I crushed on you so hard that I'd imagine these scenarios of how our first time would be, where it would be... All of that good stuff."

I began to feel worse because now he was telling me more. I grabbed the camcorder now, turning it off as I shove it into my pocket.

"And what did you...imagine?" I ask with anticipation almost.

"That...we'd possibly do it in your car. I remember your parents bought you an actually nice car. Not many people at our school just got brand new cars like that. I've even ridden in it with you to your house and to school. I imagined us doing it in your backseats, I'll admit it." He chuckles, and I look over my shoulder at the current backseats.

When I look back at him, that look said it all.

"We can let one of your high school fantasies come true, in that backseat." I tell him, and he looked like he was dreaming so suddenly.

That entertained me because I could tell he liked that idea. Except we were still in front of Buc-ees and I certainly wasn't going to do that here.

I end up driving away from it, taking us to an abandoned area. More like a deserted area as I parked the car in an area no one would bother checking. Now I glance back at Worth and saw him gawking at me.

"Do you...want to do this?" I ask, and he grins. "What?"

I see his grin cease to exist from his face, the most serious look replacing it. That emotionless stare again and kinda disturbing lack of anything.

"You get one last chance to tell me what's really going on here." He finally just tells me.

My lips part to say, but they close fast in his stare. He waited for me to just say it and I wasn't going to say that I was turning his confession in, no way.

I need...to just lie this one time.

"Fine...Micah said some cruel shit about you and me." I tell him, and I see his eyes soften now. "He's right. You've been with countless others and who's to say it's really anything special for you? It won't be your first time with a guy, but it'll be mine. You might possibly be disappointed and want to go back to what you once had before. Being with others because I'm not enough. More like, I'm not good enough-."

"Since when did you let what my brother said get to you?" Worth asks me calmly, smiling as he cradled my face. "He doesn't know what he's talking about. Sex with those people meant nothing. It was to have control, but I hated them all. No feelings, no enjoyment, I don't feel any of that. Except with you, I feel all I should feel when you do such things with someone.

"Enjoyment, lusting, awe even..." He grins at me as he ends that sentence. "If you really want to...do it here, have our first time be in here, I'm fine with that. I mean, I don't think you should do it because I think you're just going off of the shit Micah spouted. Is it really what you want? Do you want it to be like this?"

I became frustrated because now he wants to be reasonable when it comes to sex? Or is it because it's me?

Except he's right. He didn't even say anything about me in particular, he only talked shit about him.

"Forget it...I shouldn't have asked. You're probably disturbed that I'd even take it to that point."

"No...I wouldn't say that." He shook his head, soon smiling as he sat back in his seat. "I think you're just so pissed off by him and his words that you finally just...snapped? I don't know, it's kinda weird if I'm being honest."

Great, he sees how weird I'm being too?!

"Sorry..." I apologize awkwardly, and he chuckles at my apology. "Don't laugh I'm being serious."

"I know, it's quite odd to see you so...uncertain and I can't name the other thing. Something else is bothering you, I can tell. I'm not sure what, but...hope you're feeling better. I want the old Nate back. This Nate isn't being himself and he's self conscious. Don't be, you have nothing to worry about."

"I don't, huh?" I mutter to myself because I knew that was far from the truth. I have much to worry about, especially when it pertains to him. "Fine, forget the car sex."

I was about to put the car in drive until he gripped my thigh. I look at him and saw his eyes hooded in me slightly.

"Just because I am telling you to be true to yourself doesn't mean I don't want a little bit of this. There's something I've wanted to do ever since I first liked you, intrigued?"

I look at him, and once again...I just wanted a distraction. I didn't want to hurt him and yet it's not hurting him at all. Somehow, I know it is.

Neither of us said anything, just looking at one another. I could see his eyes scan me entirely as if he wanted to devour me. My eyes not moving from his whatsoever.

Until he was rushing at me as my body slammed into the car door. His tongue entering my mouth instantly, overpowering mine. I could feel his hand grope my chest. Fingers tightening around my nipple through my shirt, my body not knowing how to react.

I see him go down as his tongue licks my nipple despite my shirt still being on. Feeling the friction from his tongue and my shirt, my lips tighten together. I didn't know how to feel.

Except when his hand moved down and gripped my thigh harder, a chill went down my spine. He hadn't even done anything, but I felt myself become hard. The tightness in my pants making my dick hurt.

Worth noticed, his hand gripping my dick and I gasped. My back arching forward, realizing that I haven't done anything to my dick in so long. It was beginning to become obvious that I haven't jerked off in a bit.

My body was aching for this, I could tell. My dick especially when Worth unzipped my pants. I watched as he pulled my dick out and he looked at me now.

I look away from him, only for him to force my face forward and smirk.

"I can show you...right now, all that I have ever dreamed of doing to you when I was a freshman. This is my chance...and now that I'm doing it, I can't stop." He husks near my lips. A moan leaving my lips at how...sexy his voice was. I could feel his thumb press onto my tip, as if to make sure I didn't cum abruptly.

It only made me want to cum more.

He moved down, and I feel his tongue lick my tip. My lips parting when he sucked on it, his hand jerking on the base slowly.

I saw his eyes stay on mine while doing all of this and I closed my eyes. Because it was too strong to bare. Only for him to push my seat down and suddenly climbing over me.

To feel his hand go down my back and grope my ass, biting my lip as I let my hand go down to his dick. I grope his dick that was hard as can be in my hand.

"How long have you been waiting for?" I whisper near his lips, biting my lip when he grinds into my hand. "Hope you didn't miss me too much back then."

"And if I did?" He questions me just as lustfully, and I look around his arm. There shouldn't be any people driving by, but I hope the car isn't shaking. It doesn't feel like it, because a car shaking is so obvious.

Worth shoved me all the way down on the seat before I could kiss him, and I watch him remove my belt. Once he did he was pinning my wrists above my head as he tied them together with my belt.

"What is this?" I question him. Only to get a chuckle out of him as he yanks my pants off. Completely spreading my legs apart, I watch him grip my dick in his hand.

His lips kissing the base, I moaned when he let his tongue run all the way down to my hole. Soft moans leaving my lips as he licked at such a spot gently, feeling his thumb graze it.

"I can see it's tight again. Even after having prepped you for so long with my fingers. You're tight as ever..." Worth began to further, and I couldn't even cover my mouth as my wrists were pinned above my head.

I just wanted to moan...so much because the feeling felt too good. Could feel him push my legs up more and he looked at me.

"You tightened, open it." He demands, and I bit my lip. I tried to relax, but I was just so nervous at feeling such a thing again. Only for him to spread my hole apart himself as he shoved his tongue almost completely inside.

My back arching to feel such a thing lick away at me. I could feel my body fighting against his hold on my wrists, embarrassed out of my mind the deeper he went.

"You know what?" He breathes, sitting up as he runs his tongue on my hole once more. His fingers going inside as if to see if I was too tight. "I won't have sex with you in here, but I really want to do it badly with you. Somewhere safe, somewhere better than this. You deserve your first time to not be in a car."

"Oh yeah? I think I deserve the lowest of the low..." I mumble, just thinking about betraying him soon when I turn in that evidence. "Where do you want to go then? Because I want to do it with you too."

Worth smirks, and I could just imagine where he'd suggest. I mean...it was kind of obvious, but the idea of what with him can be anything. I don't know what he's possibly done or what he could be insinuating.

"Well...let me take you there."

___________________😮‍💨

take me where? 😀

delaware? 🌚

but he's never been there... 🫠

just be aware. 😲🫵

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we all know what's coming, right? 🥴

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- yolo 🫶