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"So, when is CJ coming back?" Justin questioned me as we sat in class attempting to do our work. I turned and looked at the empty seat in the back. Any other day, he would have been sitting there. It's been a few weeks, I knew he was hurt and he had made it pretty clear that he did not want to speak to me. 

He has been ignoring my calls and when he does answer, he finds a reason to hang before I could even really talk to him. I did not know why his absence bothered me so much; if it was anyone I would not have cared. His absence made me realize how much I cared for him; I was constantly worrying if he was okay. I wondered all the time what he might have been doing. Justin stopped writing and looked at me raising his eyebrow waiting for an answer. "I don't know," I finally answered. 

I grabbed my book and tried to read through the chapter we were supposed to be reading and taking notes on. "What do you mean you don't know?" Justin asked me.  I shrugged my shoulders, "he's your boyfriend, shouldn't you know these things?" He questioned me. 

"I don't know, Justin," I said sarcastically. "Why don't you tell me how Emma is doing and what she did during Christmas break," I told him. He looked at Ms. Brun sitting there grading papers not saying anything. I knew he did not know, they had broken up or something like that. I knew it hurt him, but he left me no choice, "exactly," I told him. 

"She's not my girlfriend," he said justifying why he did not know the answer, "you're Christopher's," he then continued on with his work. I hated to admit it, but he was right. I had to know how he was doing, but it was easier said than done. There was a chance he would not even be answering the door. 

''''''

I parked my car and got out taking my bag with me. I looked across the street at CJ's house. The For Sale sign was still in front of his house, it's not like it was going anywhere. It had been there since yesterday, I sighed and decided to walk across the street. I would see if he would answer, how bad could it be. It would not hurt, I walked across the street and hesitated a bit before ringing the doorbell. It took a few seconds before he opened the door. He was dressed in a tank top and sweatpants; his skin was lighter due to him not being exposed to the sun. He seemed surprised to see me as if he was expecting someone else. 

"Hey," I told him. It was not the ideal way to start the conversation, but I did not know what else to say. I gave him a small smile hoping that would encourage him to do the same. He did not say anything, I slid inside, after a few seconds I heard the door shut. "So, you're selling this place?" I questioned him looking around. Some of the things that had been there the last time I was here were gone. There were boxes everywhere so I assumed that's where they were. He still did not say anything, "people at school are starting to wonder where you went," I told him. "I do too and you live across the street from me," I walked to the window that opened to the back. 

"CJ, you're ignoring my calls and last time I was here you did not even bother open the door. I can't begin to imagine how you must be feeling, but I know bottling it all up inside will not help you. I'm not saying you have to talk to me, but talking to someone, anyone will help. Maybe your dad or a therapist," I told him. He again did not say anything so I turned and looked at him. "I'll go," I said. I started to walk towards the door, I had to go home anyway. My mom told me I had to help her with something.

He did not let me reach the door before he grabbed my hand and pulled me towards him. My body hit against his, his eyes met mine. He was quick to let go of my hand. "Maybe you should stop worrying about me and as for school, I'll come back when I am ready. You can tell them that and I don't need to talk to anyone, I'm fine."

"You're fine?" I asked him, I huffed, "if you're fine why are you selling this place and why are you hiding. You are not fine, fine people do not act this way."

"Bianca, I don't know what you want me to say, according to me, I am fine. And I will never be the definition of fine you want me to be, my mom's dead. That's why I'm selling the house and that's why I want to be alone. I do not want to hear another person say how sorry they are for my loss or some shit like that," he said. 

"So, what you are going to hide all your life because you don't want to see people?" I asked him, "that's not how it works. You are hurt and I understand that, everyone does. That's why people say sorry because they do not know what else to say."

"I know," he stayed silent for a while, "I'm sorry if I have been ignoring you. I need some space," I nodded my head. I did not know how much more space he wanted or needed, but he could have as much as he wanted. "and a break," he added. My eyes dilated when I heard him say that. 

"A break?" I asked him. 

"Yeah, something like that, I don't know. It's just with everything going on, us does not seem like a good choice. I haven't been fair to you and you deserve so much better than me. Someone who's not going to ignore you and who'll be there for you. I can't be that person right now or probably never, I- um..."

"CJ," I called him, "stop, okay," I told him. "Don't do this, you're just sad about your mom and I'm sorry."

"Bianca, I'm serious," he said.  "Please just leave," he said. He walked towards the door and opened it for me, "I'm sorry," he said. I did not choose to fight with him and simply walked out the door. He gave me one last look before closing the door.

AN

Guys, I am so sorry for this SUPER late update.

I have been really busy with school and work that I didn't get a chance to update. 

This is the new chapter, it's really short and sad, I'm sorry.

AU REVOIR...


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