"When did you begin to run this mafia?," I asked him. "Like how old were you?"

"I think I was 16," he began. "Fuck knows, so much shit has happened since. I lost track of fucking time."

"16's pretty young. At 16, I was trying to figure out how to straighten my hair without it getting frizzy from the top and you were looking after a whole fucking mafia."

He shrugged his shoulders. "Dads a deadbeat. Mom couldn't handle it. Brother died. Sister got knocked up. I was the only one who wasn't fucked up."

He paused for a minute. "That was the past. But now, fuck," he let out a dry chuckle. "I'm more fucked up than all of them combined."

My face fell at that. "No, you're not. You've had a hard life and look you came out stronger because of it."

"I had to." He turned away from me. His shirtless body tensed as he gripped the dresser. He glared at the reflection he saw in the mirror. "Do you know what would've happened if I didn't? If I didn't become a fucking killing machine?" I stayed silent. "I would've ended up with Luca."

My heart stopped. I glanced at him, watching his fists turn white.

I had no words to say. For once, my always talkative mouth had nothing to say. What could I say?

"I had to kill a family member once. My own fucking uncle. I loved him. He was fucking amazing," he paused, taking a deep breath. "But he stole from me. The mafia. If he just asked me for the fucking money, I could've lent him some. I was just 16. I hadn't taken over the mafia for long. People were questioning my ability to lead. I had to prove them wrong. I had to. I had people telling me what to do and how I needed to fucking do it. I knew I had to kill him. I fucking knew but they kept on bringing it up."

I walked towards him and put my hand on his forearm. He didn't seem to notice as he glowered at the reflection in the mirror. His own reflection.

"I fucking shot him!," he yelled as he punched the glass. I stumbled back. He didn't even flinch as his knuckles began to bleed. "I fucking shot my own blood. My fucking uncle. And that worst part was that I didn't even hesitate."

He continued yelling and shouting out profanities as he turned to face me. He was angry. I've seen him angry before but now, it seemed like he was furious. Murderous even. I took a step back as he stalked towards me. "I fucking killed him. Imagine what I could fucking do to you. Being with me, you're already dead," he spat out.

I was already backed up against the wall with his arms caging me in. He gritted his teeth together before he punched the wall beside my head, making me flinch. I knew he wouldn't hurt me intentionally but it didn't stop the fear of it happening from creeping up.

His chest heaved up and down for a moment as he pulled himself out of his thoughts.

He seemed to snap out of whatever trance he was in as he looked down in confusion. "It's okay," I said softly as I took one of his fists in mine.

"No it's not," he said breathily. "Fuck, I fucking scared you!" He moved away from me and ran a bloody hand through his hair.

Does that not hurt?

"You didn't."

"You thought I was gonna hurt you, didn't you?," he asked as he turned half his body to face me. I shook my head slowly.

"You don't scare me," I said firmly. I ignored the small voice I heard in my head screaming, 'it's gonna happen. I'm gonna die. It's gonna say death by angry boyfriend on my gravestone.'

We went towards the bathroom before I got out the first aid kit. He sat there silently as I worked on his knuckles, making sure there was no more glass in them.

"I'm giving you the chance to leave, now that you know everything," he said firmly.

"I'm not planning on leaving any time soon," I said quietly. "It doesn't make me love you any less. You were a kid. You did what you had to do to survive. I can't understand how you felt and how you feel now, but I can understand why you did what you did."

"He was my moms brother. She was in my ear all the damn time about it. She wanted me to kill him and I never realised how fucked up that was until now."

"You realised that now?"

"I don't think about what happened. I can't change it. It happened and that's that."

"You're fucking strong and no one can tell me otherwise."

~

"Are you sure you're not pregnant?," Valentina asked as she eyed up my bloated belly. I gave her a glare. "I'm just asking 'cause it looks like a perfect little bump."

I adjusted the way I was laid across Seb. It's like being held bridal style but instead of being held, I was laid across him. My butt fit in the huge gap he had between his legs.

I turned on my side in his lap as his arms draped over me. It may sound uncomfortable but surprisingly, it felt amazing. I don't feel this comfortable in my bed and that's saying something.

He moved his hand to rest on top of my belly as a small smirk played at his lips. "Now, that's just been fucking confirmed!," Valentina cheered.

"Not until I see the stick with your pee on it," Vin said making me scrunch my face up in disgust.

"Want me to shove it down your throat as well?," I asked mockingly. I instantly felt bad before he shot me a glare and flipped me off.

That's better than nothing.

Isabella watched us silently from the other couch as Dom burst out laughing.

"She's gonna shove it down your throat and it'll come out of your ass maybe then we'll see two lines," Dom chuckled as he threw popcorn at Vin who managed to catch it in his mouth.

I pushed Sebs hand from my belly. "I'm not pregnant," I said firmly. "That's really mean too. I mean, come on, just because I ate too much and look a little bloated?"

"Stop complaining," Vin said as he rolled his eyes. "Maybe if you watch The Vampire Diaries with me then, they wouldn't call you fat."

"No one called me fat," I said slowly.

"Well then I was thinking it," he said firmly.

"Say that again and I'll change the Netflix password," Seb threatened him.

"You wouldn't!," Vin gasped in shock.

"I would and I won't tell you the password," Seb confirmed.

"What about my-," Vin began to ask concerned.

"Vampire Diaries? Gone," Seb said. "Phoof."

"Sometimes, I really hate you," Vin scoffed out angrily. "Babe you'll watch it with me, won't you?" Valentina looked around nervously as she thought of an answer.

"How about we watch something else? Like How To Get Away With Murder?," she suggested.

"Fuck that. I'd rather stab my eye."

"That's a bit extreme," I said with a slight chuckle.

"Really? Says the one whose boyfriend is gonna change the Netflix password. Do you not think that's extreme?," Vin asked sarcastically, getting worked up.

"Fine Vin!," I exclaimed. "I'll watch your shitty shows with you but that means you'll have to watch something I love."

He looked at me wearily before agreeing. "I'm rewatching it for the third time," he stated feeling content. "But what are you gonna make me watch?"

"365 Days," I said with a straight face.

"Shut the fuck up," Seb said. "Like fuck you're gonna watch it with him."

"Lili!," Valentina exclaimed struggling to hold her laughter in.

"Damn," Dom commented. "Even I haven't watched that yet."

"I'm kidding," I bursted out laughing from all of their bewildered facial expressions. "We're gonna watch Five Feet Apart."

"Isn't that like a chick flick?"

I narrowed my eyes at him. To be honest, I'm not really sure. "It's a book that's been turned into a movie. It's really sad. It broke my heart the first time I watched it so bring a whole box of tissues 'cause you're gonna need it," I advised him.

"I'd rather watch 365 Days," I heard Vin mumbled before Valentina wacked him over the head.

She let out an annoyed scoff. "You should watch it. Maybe you'll get some tips from Massimo."

"Tips for?"

"Shut up," she snapped, getting annoyed.

"Why'd you mention it then?"

"Vin, shut up," she said seriously.

"If you're getting so worked up over it, we'll watch it tonight," he said confused. She gave him a glare.

"Is it that time of the month or is it sexual frustration?," he asked, whispering loudly. She whipped her head so fast, it gave me whiplash.

"Man, you can't whisper for shit," Dom laughed.

"I can. Maybe you should close your big fat ears."

"There we go with the fat shaming again," I said rolling my eyes.

"Fuck off!," he exclaimed, feeling like we're all ganging up against him. "I'll be back later for some food."

He got up from his seat and left the room. Valentina let out a sigh before she went to follow him, leaving us all knowing what they were gonna get up to.

That's something I could live without knowing.