Above a picture of Noah Conteniro who plays Jason.

This chapter is dedicated to GabriellePichon.

"You guys didn't have sex yet?"

My bestfriend Paige asked me. She always wants to know about me and Lianna.

"No she's a virgin. I'm not trying to push it. I don't want her to think I'm only with her for sex."

She smirked. Sometimes she can be a bitch but she's my closest friend.

"Has she at least gone down on you?"

"No the most we've done is light making out. I haven't even seen her naked yet. Lianna isn't like other girls who just want to f*ck, she's into taking things slow."

At first it was nice because she's different, but now not so much.

"I haven't had sex since my last girlfriend and its making me horny all the time. It's gotten to the point where I've considered either breaking up with Lianna or f*cking someone else in the meantime."

"Woow I feel sorry for you Jason. I know how much you love sex. What are you gonna do? I told you she wasn't going pop her cherry anytime soon, didn't I."

From the beginning Paige always complained how Lianna is not right for me, we aren't right for each other, she's too nice and innocent. There nothing wrong with being innocent. I'm starting to question Paige's feelings because the way she constantly complains I think she might have feelings for me, more than a friend kind of way. Maybe I'm mistaking it though and Paige just doesn't like Lianna.

"Jason screw Lianna I'll have sex with you. She doesn't have to know."

○○○

"That's what happened. I wasn't the one who initiated it."

Alezorio and I sat across from Jason in a booth at the back of a cute cafe. He just finished explaining how he ended up having sex with his friend, what I walked in on in the shower. Hearing what she thought about he back then hurts a little because I knew she didn't like me. It doesn't bother me now. Paige is Irrelevant in all this.

Just because someone says you should do something doesn't mean you have to do it. There's alway a choice, whether good or bad, the decisions we make each day. Ultimately all our choices fall soly on us because its our will that allows us to make them.

If he decided to go through with something, there's no one to blame for his actions but himself. His decision was made by him and him alone. Paige didn't hold a gun to his head so he would have sex with her. Jason is doing what he always does, blaming others for his own actions. In the past it annoyed me when he did, now I don't give a sh*t.

"What's you're point? What are you trying to get out of explaining this?"

"Before you say, to get back with me know that's never gonna happen. What you did broke me back then. When we were together I was a sad, low-esteem girl who needed your affection because it made me feel good about myself. It made me like myself a bit more. When I found you cheating I fell back into my old cycle of hating myself. Hating the things that makes me, me. I focused only on school and pulled away from people even more. You weren't good for me then and you certainly aren't good for me now. Jason nothing you say can make me want you in that way again. I never want to be that girl again."

At the end of my long spiel Alezorio's hand tightens around mine. He sat on my right giving me support in the way only he can. Since we walked in the cafe he hasn't said a thing. Maybe because he knows I needed to get this out my system, maybe because he knows he wouldn't be able to reign in on his anger and possibly beat Jason to death. Whatever the reason I'm happy he's here with me. I need him to see once and for all, Jason doesn't mean anything to me. There's no hope for us getting back togther.

"Lianna I didn't know I made you hate yourself. Back then I thought you were and I still think you're the most beuatiful, strongest, kindest, smartest person I've ever met. I never meant for you to feel that way. I'm sorry Lianna."

"Well you did when we broke up. It didn't happen because of you only. I've realized now its because I wasn't secure in my love for myself before we started dating. So when you hurt me it felt a million times worst. I didn't have any self love or self worth to hold me together. I got torn into a billion pieces. Something I've learned since being with Alezorio is, I shouldn't need someone's love for me to feel good about myself, all I need is my own. Loving myself makes me learn how to love others around me. You have to love yourself first before you can love anyone else. I love Alezorio not because he loves me but because I love myself enough already. I love him because he loved me even before I loved myself."

"I get it now. That's why you're even more attractive."

There's nothing sexier than a person whose confident and secure within themself. I know because I've noticed it since I've gain this confidence.

"I'm glad you get it. So please stop coming to my house harassing Jaye."

"I didn't mean to do that. I just wanted her to tell me how to contact you. I didn't mean for things to get out of hand with Alezorio either. I'm sorry I've caused you so much trouble Lianna in the past and now. I see now I wasn't the right man for you. I wish you both all the best, thanks for meeting to talk with me. Goodbye."

Jason after this gets up exit the cafe. Alezorio and I watch him leave. Good riddance It's finally over. We can get back to our normal scheduled program.

"Lianna I'm so proud of you. I'm sorry about what I did baby. I'm so amazed by how strong and brave you've become. I love you baby never forget that."

I couldn't help the smile that took over.

"I know, I love you so much too. I meant everything I said about you. Don't ever doubt my love."

A/N: I think I'm going to rewrite the last chapter. 48 could have been written better in my opinion. Maybe once I start editing all the chapters. 10k koi soups. Isn't that amazing?

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