A/N: the spacing is being all wonky right now.... this story is not edited. I still don't have a computer but I'm trying to work on unconditional now... 

thank you all for voting and commenting, I really would love it, if you've not voted or forgotten to but liked a chapter that you go back and vote, I'd appreciate it :) 

Chapter 37b - Kayla POV

I was starting to hear talking but it was different, I could hear everything. Papa was around and he was talking. When I opened my eyes I was on a bed. But I wasn't me. My head was not the same and my body as well. I looked down and I had paws, like my wolf. I was still a wolf. But nothing hurt anymore and that was good. 

Papa came closer, "Kayla sweetheart," the two women from before came in the room with the man that took us from the house. He stayed at the door. How do I be Kayla again? I asked myself. I tried to stand but I was not strong enough and kept falling on the bed. I made a whine, but went silent. I didn't want Papa or the Masen to hit me, but I couldn't stand up and everything was catching my attention. Papa stopped talking, but I could hear lots of stuff. Lots of different noise. I didn't like it. 

Papa reached for me and he picked me up, carrying me carefully, to another room. It was a room like the one in the bad house, but different. I started to worry because bad daddy would bring me in a room like this one. Be fake nice to me. 

"Shavon, she's shaking..." Papa said low, but I hear it anyways. I hear a sound, like someone can't breath. "Chris put Kayla down now," Masen said, but I could only hear him, not see him. he said it strong, but it didn't sound mean. 

Papa turned to the people, the woman looked sad, the man, Masen, he looked different. 

"One as- he played..." he stopped talking and Papa made a sound, but then he put me down slowly and stepped back. He put me on a nice soft thing, but not soft like the bed. One lady, her name I know is Shavon, she came in with stuff in her hands, then but them on the table in the room. After that she left the small familiar but different room. 

"You don't have to be afraid Kayla," Papa said, "I won't hurt you. I won't let anyone else hurt you either," he moved back out of the room and pulled the door shut. I was still on the soft thing, but I was looking at the door. Waiting for who Papa would send in the room... Was he going to send in bad daddy? Or maybe Nico? or bad man that took the babies? 

My chest hurt and my stomach felt funny, but I didn't make a noise, I was to afraid too. "Kayla," Papa said from outside the door, so I waited, "you are in your wolf form right now. For you to shift back, to be human again, all you have to do is think of yourself as a little girl. So close your eyes, relax and then think of yourself human..." Papa said, but I started thinking that maybe I should stay a wolf. No one hurted me as a wolf, but as Kayla lots of people hurt me. Could I always be a wolf? I wondered as I watched the turning thing. When it turned, I knew that meant someone was coming in. So far no one had turned it yet. 

"Sweetheart, no one is coming to hurt you in there. But if you want to be human again, just do what I said. It won't hurt like before... just close your eyes and think of being Kayla, think of walking, your legs,  and arms, and you'll be you again," Papa said again. 

There was a noise, one noise though, it sounded like when bad man would throw something down, or throw us. I held myself tight, waiting for someone to come in but no one came in yet. 

"Kayla... when you were with your momma, brothers and sisters, the bad guys, they would open doors whenever they wanted. That is wrong sweetheart," Papa said but he was the wrong one. I knew better... this was probably a bad game. 

"I know you don't believe me, but unless you say anyone can come into that room, no one will come. The right way... the good way... the only way, anyone will ever come into a bathroom you or your siblings are in is if they knock, like this," and there was a noise. I guess it was a knock. 

"When you hear that Kayla, if you are on the inside you ask, 'who is it?' and the person on the outside, they say who it is. They ask you to come in, and if you want them to come in you say come in. But Kayla, if you don't want them in there, you tell them no. So right now, you are in the room. No one is going to come in there with you... do you see the door knob?" he asked. 

"It's the handle to push the door in... on there is a little piece. When you turn that, it means you are locking the door. You are making sure that no one comes in, when you want someone to come in, you turn it." I looked at the handle... there was a turn thing like he said. The basement didn't have those turn things. Not on this side. 

"We won't hurt your Kayla..." Papa sounded like he was crying. Was someone hurting him out there? 

I put my head down, but I didn't close my eyes, or think of myself as Kayla with my arms and legs. I waited a while; even though I was hungry... we had been getting lots of food now... Papa started to hum. I thought again, doing what Papa said, thinking of myself with legs and walking and then I was. Legs were in front of me, I wiggled my toes. Then my fingers too. 

I was still on the floor, but I had no clothes on, and I was worried again. I stared at the door, then back at my arms and legs. They didn't hurt anymore, not my stomach, or my chest or my mouth.

"Sweetheart, Kayla, if you are human again, can you knock one time?" Papa asked but he wasn't coming in. So I lifted my hand and made a small knock. He sighed, "Okay good. You can take a shower... push the red and blue, get the water warm like you want it. There is a towel on the sink, and clothes for you to change into when you are dry. Take your time, if you need help knock two times and I will send Shavon or Juliet in, if that's okay can you knock one time?" No one was going to come in here? Or pretend to be nice? I still didn't move, just watched the door. Then knocked.

 "Kayla, if it would make you feel more comfortable, you can lock the door,” Papa said and slowly I went to my feet, but I was shocked. It was all very different, nothing was hurting and I couldn’t remember a time when I didn’t hurt somewhere.

All these new rules were confusing, I wasn’t sure what to believe but if I could lock the door I would, and did. Then I started the water, smiling that I would get to take a bath for real, alone and I didn’t have to share my water with my brothers and sisters. There were things on the side, but I didn’t dare touch them, Papa didn’t say I could touch them. Only turn the water on, and use the stuff the woman brought into the room. I stayed in the water a long time, and when it was getting cold I turn it off and then dried and dressed myself.

When I was dressed, I held the wet towel and tried to dry my hair, smiling to myself, it wasn’t a dream; I used warm water and so far nothing bad has happened.  I had put on the soft shirt and pants, underwear and I even got socks, plus shoes. But I didn’t like the shoes. I couldn’t move my feet.

“Kayla, if you’re done can you come out now?” Papa asked me and I stopped smiling, I didn’t want to go out there. But if I stayed in here too long, who knew what would happen, so holding the towel I unlocked the door and then opened it. I thought Papa would be up on his legs but he was sitting on the floor, and he smiled at me when I opened. I didn’t smile back.

“Are you hungry?” he asked pushing a tray towards me, when I looked out, I took a step out of the bathroom and saw the women. Juliet and Shavon, they all smiled at me too. The other door was open and I could see my Momma, brothers and sisters sleeping. Looking down at the food I nodded, and sat on the floor. Just as I was picking up a piece of a sandwich and cup of milk, Uncle Logan came into the room. He smiled at me too. They were all always smiling at me and I didn’t know why? 

“How do you feel Kayla?” Uncle Logan asked me, nicely sitting on the bed, I didn’t know what to answer though. So I just nodded, bringing the sandwich to my mouth, biting a little bit and chewing.

I didn’t want to look at any of the grownups too much so I just gazed down at my lap eating slowly, until Shavon spoke to me. “Kayla we need to have a very important conversation,” she said.

“Now that you’ve shifted, you can join the pack…” I stopped moving, finding it hard to even chew my food. I could remember what Papa said before, if I joined the pack, and then they would hear my thoughts. They’d find out that I was bad, and probably send me back to the bad house.

I shook my head, “You don’t want to join the pack?” Uncle Logan asked me, so I shook my head again and went back to eating my sandwich. “Are you sure sweetheart, it’s fine if you do not want too but it would be nice maybe?” Papa asked me, pulling my eyes to his, he didn’t look mad, but his eyebrows where pushed together. I didn’t want to join the pack. So I shook my head one final time and watched Papa and Uncle Logan look at each other. “Well… whenever you’re ready… you can join okay?” Uncle Logan said fake smiling.

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Chris POV

Shavon, Juliet, Logan and I sat watching Kayla finish her sandwich, chewing softly and drinking her milk. I wasn’t surprised in the least that Kayla declined being in the pack, the problem was why? Besides the obvious really… that she didn’t want us in her head.

Hold off on asking her about the three to four months for now… maybe you should ask Rainy... I told Shavon and Juliet, I know others were being hurt, but I didn’t want us to add trauma by rushing Kayla. Her mind was a place we had to slowly move into. They nodded and Logan left, stopping at the end of Rainy, Keith and Cole’s bed gazing at them, shaking his head. He took too much on himself… it wasn’t okay for him to take on this entire extra blame when it really wasn’t his fault they weren’t found. Every one of us had a part to play.

I went back to Kayla, noting that her shifting helped her injuries heal, she still had scars but they were faint, pinkish and appeared to be years old, instead of only a few days. “How are you feeling, are you hurting anywhere sweetheart?” I asked wanting to make sure, that she wasn’t hiding and injury. She shook her head, swallowing the last bit of her sandwich, and then slowly finishing her milk.

Juliet took the empty tray away, leaving Kayla unsettled without a distraction, “Are you sleepy?” I asked her and watched as she thought of it, shaking her head. “You’ve been sleeping for a few days… the others have been working on an art project would you like too?” Shavon asked her waiting patiently for Kayla’s response.

When Kayla nodded it was a big relief, she wasn’t completely closing in, so standing slowly we waited for her and took her to the art classroom. Pulling out pieces of the puzzles that weren’t complete, giving Kayla as many art supplies as we had the others. Glitter, markers, glue, salts, colored tissue, watercolor paints and we just let her do what she wanted. After giving her all the supplies I worked on my own project, just letting Shavon take over, concentrating on what I was doing and making sure that I had things ready.

We first brought the children into this room, Shavon ad Juliet decided to go with the Puzzle Person group activity… cutting up the pieces of a person and having each child decorate their share. When they woke we would be continuing that little project but back here I was decorating rocks.

After Kayla’s shift, I painted the first one to give to her… it was already completed and I was only bidding time.

“Whoa, that’s pretty awesome!” Shavon said excitedly, picking up Kayla’s finished puzzle piece and placing it near the others, letting it dry. “So now we have to clean up…” I started putting my own supplies away as well.

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When everything was as we met it, I walked over to Kayla, sitting uncomfortably on one of the small chairs, “So I made something for you…” I started going slow. Pacing everything worked well with all the children. Rushing only frightened them.

Kayla gazed at me, her face blank but I had gotten accustomed to that look on all their faces – sans Michelle and Nicole – I expected it really, “Would you like it now or later?” she blinked once which I took for now. So I opened my palm, the painted heart shaped rock face up, and remained still. Just waiting for her to squelch her nerves and pick it up.

“I painted it for you… it’s a heart shape,” I whispered, her focus was on the small object now. Keeping my hands as still as possible, I waited until finally Kayla reached, her thin hands picking up the little rock, shaky but she did it. Held it close to her face, concentrating while using her left hand to trace the letters.

B – R – A – V – E.

From what Rainy told us, Seth had them learn letters, but not how to read, but they could each spell their names.

I watched as she mouthed the letters, her eyebrows puckered together, her blue eyes wide and focused on the rock. After mouthing the letters twice she looked up at me, frustrated if I read her face right, so I hid my smile. “It says brave, do you know what that means?” when she shook her head, I swallowed and reached for the book “Franklin Goes To The Hospital,” and began reading. Showing Kayla the pictures, pointing to the words and when I got to one she recognized she looked between her rock and the story, before looking at me, but remained silent. I continued reading, each time the word brave came up I was dying to know what my daughter was thinking, if she understood what I was reading. I listened to everything, all the noises around us, but when I got to the point in the story really explaining what being brave meant, having courage… Kayla’s heart raced.

“Just because you’re scared doesn’t mean you aren’t brave, being brave means doing what you have to do no matter how scared you feel…” I read slowly, glancing between Kayla and the book as she listened, finishing the story and putting the book down.

“It says ‘brave,’ on the rock, because I think you are very brave sweetheart, I know things are all new and scary now, but even then you still do things like blink to answer, and you bathed and dressed yourself all on your own in that room… and you shifted, even though it hurt a lot and I know you didn’t want that to happen, you still tried very hard and now you’re sitting here with me…” I gave her a moment. “I know you don’t want to join the pack, because you might be scared but that’s okay. Not joining won’t make me love you any less… do you understand?” I asked hopeful.

She nodded, still not looking at me, but at the rock in her hand, and now more than ever I wanted to know what was going on in her mind.

“Would you like to see something else?” I asked, Shavon coming nearer, easing into the space we created.

“Everyone else is napping so we can explore, if you’d like, or we can go outside?” Shavon added.

Finally when Kayla nodded holding onto the rock still, I stood, walking to the door, leaving first knowing Shavon was with her behind me I walked slowly up the stairs. When we stopped at the first floor I turned to them, “This is a pool, you swim in there… your mom was an excellent swimmer sweetheart, I’m sure she’d love to teach all of you…” and so we continued, showing her all the things, like the kitchen, library, gym, Rainy’s garden and by the second floor I could see that she was getting tired. Her shift may have healed her injuries, but she still lacked muscle mass and was easily tired. Shavon, noting that as well offered to carry Kayla, which she accepted and we made our way to the third floor.

“This floor is only for your brothers and sisters… they are your bedrooms,” I said softly, the doors open Kayla peeked inside, her tiny fist holding onto Shavon’s shirt. When we finally made it to her own room, Shavon put her down. “This is yours…” I said turning to her, standing away from the door, “would you like to take a look inside?” I asked gaging her reaction. Slowly. Patiently.

Our situation was all admittedly a very out of the box circumstance, or well that’s probably what people thought, nothing like this could be happening to them, until it was. I could tell Kayla was curious but cautious was the easier behavior to spot right now, even her steps were measured. Decorating the room, we had no idea if something we did buy could cause any unwanted problems, so as she looked around I held my breath. Just hoping that nothing would upset her, when she turned around she gazed at me, but it was much more than that. Kayla seemed to be watching the whole space.

Shavon and I were reading her, but she was observing us as well. I think she’s surprised that we didn’t come in… Shavon said unsure.

“We won’t come in your room, unless you give us permission, sweetheart,” I told her but she was still wary of us, she nodded and went back to searching until she was touching a small chest the size of an adult shoe box.

“You can put your treasures in there; things you find or that are given to you, that mean a lot to you…” Shavon told her while I just rested against the doorjamb. Not meeting our eyes, she nodded and placed the small rock I gave her inside closing it after. Kayla took one more look at the room before slowly walking back towards us. Shavon offered Kayla her arms, to which she accepted and we went back downstairs.

As I walked down the stairs I couldn’t help but smile, we made progress today… I could only hope that when her brothers and sisters spoke to her, Kayla would respond. 

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“Just because you’re scared doesn’t mean you aren’t brave, being brave means doing what you have to do no matter how scared you feel…” << is from the book 'Franklin Goes To The Hospital,' I posted a video of someone reading it. Check it out... it's pretty awesome if you aren't familiar with it. 

next update: I have the third part of this almost completed... so maybe on Sunday... 

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