(67) Turn the Lights On

Background color
Font
Font size
Line height

Chapter 67- Turn the lights on.

It felt like ages until finally we were home, or to a place which had to be home right now.

I had spent days trying to act as if nothing was wrong, I tried to be strong, but why did it feel so hard now? Kyle completely smashed any resolve I had.

I had always thought people over reacted when the people they loved had left, but little did I know how much it actually hurt. Hell, it hurt so bad.

As soon as the car had stopped on the drive I opened the door and rushed inside.

Matt called my name, I heard him but I didn't bother to stop. I just wanted to be alone. I knew he knew that too.

My thoughts were correct when I got to my room and didn't hear the sounds of his footsteps behind me. I was glad, right now I just needed time to myself. I knew Matt respected that.

As soon as I got into the room and shut the door tightly behind me, I got into bed without bothering to change the clothes I was in. Pregnancy clothes were comfortable enough anyway.

As soon as my head hit the pillow, it was as if the dam burst. Tears after tears escaped the corners of my eyes and made a path down my cheeks. I was sure I was getting my pillow wet, but right now the pain in my chest felt worse than the feeling of drowning in my own tears.

Was I that dramatic that I had to cry so much over a man that was still in my life? I guess I could only blame it on the hormones, but my heart felt too empty to base this on that.

I spent the last five minutes crying, and then it all kind of stopped and all I did was stare at the ceiling feeling nothing but sorry for myself.

Soon, however, I could feel my eye lids begin to close. Crying had wiped out every ounce of energy sizzling throughout my body. Now all I wanted to do was sleep. Atleast then I couldn't hurt no more.

I woke up in blackness. There wasn't one light on which could help me to see anything.

Even after I had opened my eyes, I was wide awake. Looking to my phone I found out I had been sleeping for almost ten hours.

That's when I realised an arm was looped around my body. I wondered why I didn't feel that kind of weight on my body sooner.

"Matt." I shook the shoulder which I had felt around for. It was too dark to really see anything. I could see the outline of his body and that was all.

"Matt." I shook him even harder and soon I felt his body twitch beside me. His arm tightened its hold around my body.

"Babe?" The voice which came out made my heart stop. It didn't sound like Matt, and by the way the hairs on my arms stood to attention, I knew it was Kyle.

"Kyle? What the fuck are you doing here?" I tried to whisper sternly but it turned into a gasp. I was too shocked to do anything else.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry but I haven't slept and I just needed to be with you." Kyle let out, his voice taking that croaky and sleepy tint to it.

"So you decided to do it without my permission?" I asked. Kyle nodded but he didn't say a word. I sighed loudly. "You could have asked. You haven't been sleeping well, I would have helped you."

"But would you have helped me? Really?" Kyle questioned, and by the sound of his voice I knew that he didn't quite believe me at all.

I felt a little insulted. But deep down, he was right. Would I have helped him? I mean, I'm sure I would have freaked out and told him to leave instead.

"I care, Kyle." was my only reply.

Kyle didn't reply and for the next few minutes we were cascaded in silence.

I should have kicked Kyle out, told him to leave, just for the moment. I couldn't think whilst he was around. But there was something so oddly comforting about sitting here next to Kyle, again, in bed. Something that felt too much of home.

Oh, how I wanted to go back home. I craved my own bed, my own bed shared with Kyle beside me.

"Do you remember when we first started dating?" Kyle suddenly asked. I snapped out of my trance.

"Yes?" How could I forget. Ever loving Kyle.

"And I told you I would move the world and beyond just to be with you?" I nodded in reply, my mouth too dry to speak. "Well, I told you that when we were nothing more than boyfriend and girlfriend. We're married now, Cali, and I'll do more than move the world just to be with you. Fuck, Cali, I'd do anything." His voice sounded so desperate and I'm sure it even cracked too.

"That much, huh?" I giggled nervously, not really happy enough to be humouress.

"You have no clue, absolutely no idea." Kyle whispered. "And do you also remember how I said we were a team?"

"Yeah." I nodded my head. We were a team. We are a team.

"Well I meant it. But look at us now, we're not working in unison anymore, we're working in conflict with eachother. Why? Because I was a dick to you and I know it. But you love me don't you?"

"What kind of stupid question is that? Of course I do." I let out. I wanted to cry, but I couldn't do that yet. I had to keep my hormones in check for just a little while longer.

"Then why leave?" And that question hit me harder than anything. Why did I leave?

Kyle was so right, so god damn right. If I loved him like I said I did, if I wanted to make this marriage work, then why leave? Why work together in conflict?

Kyle wasn't perfect, hell, I was far from it. At the end of the day, we're all dicks to eachother, we all make mistakes so why do we have to prosecute that person when we're not that much better ourselves?

"I've made a mistake." I whispered slowly. "I've made a mistake." I let out again. "Fuck, Kyle, I need you." And I'm sure I sobbed.

The next thing I knew, Kyle's arms were wrapped around my body tightly. I felt Kyle let out a big breath from beside me. It fanned against my neck.

"Please come home." Kyle said quietly against my neck.

"Okay." I let out without even having to think more about it. "Okay."

Before I could say anything, Kyle left my body.

"Let's turn the light on. Let me see you." Kyle got out of bed to turn the light on and as soon as he did I squinted up to look at him through my tears.

Kyle walked up to me and grabbed hold of my hand. He pulled me up until I was standing infront of him.

"So you'll come home?" Kyle asked. I was looking at the floor when he asked so he took hold of my chin gently. "Look at me." My eyes moved up to meet his and my heart felt as if the life was getting squeezed back in to it. "You'll come home?" Kyle asked again. I nodded my head and smiled.

"I want to come home." I stated desperately. Fuck it, I needed him, I needed my own home with him in it.

As soon as I said that, before Kyle and I could say anymore, the door opened and more light came flooding in to the room.

Kyle turned and I looked to the door with him.

"What's going on here?" Matt asked as he stood there in a pair of boxers. His eyes were hooded as if he had only just woken up.

"Kyle's here." I said. Matt looked over to me.

"I can bloody well see that, baby girl. Why is he here?" Matt asked, his stance taking on a more protective role.

"I want to go home." I stated. Kyle wrapped his arm around my waist.

"Does this mean I get my guest room back?" Matt replied. "I can finally keep hunky men in here again without them being intimadated by an angry pregnant woman." I rolled my eyes at his words but smiled nonetheless.

"Get out of here." I waved him off as I laughed. He smiled my way, his eyes twinkling.

"It's nice to see you happy again. No more fuck ups, Knight." Matt pointed to Kyle. Kyle chuckled but he promised he wouldn't fuck up again.

Matt left shortly after and that's when I began to pack everything back into my bag. It was early in the morning, but who cared?

I couldn't wait to get home.

Kyle took the bag and placed it in to the car whilst I went down stairs to talk to Matt.

Matt was leaning against the wooden table in the centre of the room. He opened his arms wide and took me in to a hug.

"It's been nice having you at Matt's residence." Matt stated as he pulled me close. "I'll miss you."

"I'm only going back down the road." I replied.

"Can't a man ever miss his best friend without being penalised for it?"

"I'm joking. I guess I'll miss you too. Come up tomorrow."

"Sure thing." Matt smiled my way.

Kyle soon came back into the room.

"Want a coffee?" Matt asked. Kyle nodded his head and they both went in to the kitchen together.

I guess I'll just stay here then.

I took a seat on one of the wooden chairs tucked under the table.

"Thank you for looking after her." I heard Kyle's voice from the kitchen. "It seriously means a lot. You've been doing the job I was meant to do."

"It's no problem. She's been a star." I almost wanted to get up and tell them off for treating me as if I was a child, but I thought better of it.

"How are things anyway?" I heard Matt ask. "I mean, with the depression and things. My grandma suffered terribly with it, so I understand it is a very serious mental illness. I do understand how hard it is."

"Thanks, mate. I think I'm getting better, I guess only time will tell. Atleast now I have my girl back and I don't have to worry so much about that. I hope Cali can just bear with me until I get my old self back. I think I just need her support and her time. I realise that now."

"You're lucky it wasn't too late."

"I am the luckiest." I could almost hear Kyle's smile.

Without wanting to hear anymore I got up from the chair and rushed into the kitchen as fast as I could with a belly like mine.

I almost tumbled into Kyle's arms.

"Careful." He laughed. Matt chuckled from beside me and I smiled into Kyle's shirt.

God how I missed him.

Soon, Kyle and I moved away from eachother. Kyle drank his coffee and before I knew it, Kyle was taking me to his car.

Matt came out to tell us that he was indeed coming up tomorrow whether we made plans or not and we didn't at all decline.

He was allowed up any time he wanted and I knew Kyle was fine with that.

When Kyle and I were finally on the road, Kyle laid a hand against my thigh.

"I'm so happy you're coming back." He stated. And I was too. Very happy.

"You've got a good way with words." I replied. He used those words in a way which struck my heart, it really called in deep and I realised how much I needed to be beside him again.

"It took me weeks to figure out the right words to say. When I came to breaking point last night, I realised I just needed to speak from the heart. The place which tells me everyday why I'm in love with you."

"I love you." I whispered his way as I looked to him.

"I fucking love you." Kyle croaked. "And I remember when I told you that between us the sun was never going down." Kyle stated.

"I remember that too."

"Well, maybe the sun did go down on us for a little while, huh?" Kyle looked to me and smiled.

"It did, but that's okay, it's rising again now."

"I think I need to change the words to that corny little quote."

"Oh really? To what?" I questioned.

"I don't know. Not yet anyway, I'll have to keep working on it for you." He smiled. "All I know is that maybe there is meant to be darkness. That's a part of life, darkness and light. No sun is meant to stay up, it's an indication of the passing of time. I guess without it the world would be in ruins."

"And we don't want it in ruins."

"Exactly." Kyle replied. "We just want it to work."

------------

Instagram ; dreamxrse

You are reading the story above: TeenFic.Net