✤✤✤Arya's POV✤✤✤

I lowered my gaze, because I was feeling very uneasy seeing him being angry like this. I felt scared by the conflagration in his eyes. The fury in them could roast my soul.

“It didn’t cross my mind before I went away and I forgot my phone at home. And I don’t remember your number. So I couldn’t contact you.” Somehow I murmured, staring at the floor in guilt.

"You forgot and it didn’t cross your mind, what do you mean by it? Isn’t it necessary for you tell me? Didn’t you think if I would be worried or not?” He questioned in anger and I shuddered in fear. Tears were about to make their way to my cheeks. My heart was throbbing in wild chaos.

I never thought he would be so angry at me. He grabbed my arms and yanked me closer to him. I was unable to keep my tears to myself now and the tiny drop sparkled on my cheeks with remorse.

I didn't have the courage to look in his eyes. I just stayed frozen on my place. When he spit in menace,"Look in my eyes, Would you?"

"I am really sorry, Please forgive me." Trembling regret fell from my lips.

My apology won't be real if I won't even look in his eyes. Then that would be only a statement made out of fear not true regret. So I finally lifted my gaze, my heart striking in my chest. Anxiousness had seized my brain completely.

My eyes dwelled in his eyes, trying to find that hidden kindness of him which was concealed behind the blaze of his wrath.

He had said many words during this period but for my ears they all become a faint echo from far away. A sound which had words but you really can't make sense of those words. And it all happened because I was so focused in his eyes, searching the kindness.

But some other emotion of his heart bumped into me. The flutter of his lips, and a translucent coating of salty pearls jewelled on his lower eye lids. The emotion rested somewhere there. The redness of his eyes resembling blood.

As if his eyes were bleeding, As if they are wounded. But the tears that shined bright with darkness hinted me. It wasn't his eyes which were wounded, it was his heart which was bleeding.

When the realisation dawned upon me. The words that were mere far away call for me some seconds ago, start colliding against my ears once again. This time they were screams, loud and harsh and deafening but filled with sorrow, crying their pain in rage.

He looked into my eyes as his breaths were slitting through his throat.

“Do you even know how worried I was? Do you even know what kind of horrifying thoughts I was having and you said you forgot?” He accused me.

And no part of my body could counter this accusation. The shame stitched my lips together to utter anything. What could I say? What could I do? I was the person who hurt that person who held me in his warm embrace when the coldness inside my heart nearly killed me.

I was embarrassed at myself having no answers to any of his question.

“Why are you silent now? Say, something. Give me my answer, would you?” One more cry escaped his lips.

His fingers travelled in my hair clutching them tightly and as he tugged them, I felt a single breath trembling through my throat making a cold sigh. My heart panicked.

And he moved closer to my lips and his troubled breaths brushed against my lips sharply.

His frantic, unsettling breaths dancing on my lips were getting me intoxicated,

“Do you even know how much I tried to call you? I even went to your home. I searched for you everywhere in the whole city. Do you even know how much I...” he bit his words back immediately and just his breaths tussled my lips, not the words he wanted to say.

His eyes were revealing the instant regret flashing on his face. Some words that he wanted to keep in his heart had fled free from his tongue because of his wrath. And I wondered what those words were.

A silence hung between us only to become a melody of struggling breaths.

“How much you...?” I questioned him with desperation to hear his answer and he opened his mouth to say something but the words died there on his tongue.

He avoided my glance and uttered, “How much I care about you?”

This was not the answer I wanted to hear. A lump of sorrow filling my heart. I also knew this wasn't the answer he wanted to give. There was something else he kept in darkness. But I wasn't in state to protest. I had to accept this answer for now.

I just glanced into his eyes trying to read his emotions, trying to know what actually he was hiding from me? But he didn’t let me. He just pushed me away from him lightly and shifted his gaze somewhere else.

“You know what, It was my fault. I thought you think of me as your guardian angel. So you would at least think about me a bit. But you don’t even care about my emotions a little bit. So, let it go.”

He looked at me once again, this time the hurt was more transparent than his anger.

“Miss. Arya, because you don’t take me seriously. That’s why from now onwards I am no more your guardian angel. From the start you wanted me not to bother you, So, I won’t.” His tears finally got freedom from his eye lids.

“What?” I exclaimed in daze, terrorised by his words.

“Sir...l...isten to me, Sir....” I called his name behind him but he stomped off, leaving me alone not even bothering to look at me.

Before I could talk to him. He was vanished from my sight. I couldn't comprehend anything together. I wasn't able to pieces anything that happened. Just something sharp, edgy pierced my heart.

Perhaps they were his words which were still buzzing loudly in my ears.

I was feeling clueless, hopeless. I didn’t know what to do. Some tears dropped from my eyes and I just brushed them roughly.

I went to my home and frantically looked for my phone.

I grabbed it tightly in my hand for the first time after returning from parents house and I saw there were a numerous notifications flashing on my phone. And all were about Riyansh Sir's call and Messages.

His words still ringing in my mind. A heavy burden of guilt treasuring in my chest. On the other hands my eyes hurting and drowsiness claiming over my ruined state.

I couldn't let this weight burden me forever and my regret slowly poison me to  death. Therefore I determined I would apologize to him for my ignorance, for hurting him and for my carelessness.

The next day his period came and he didn’t even bear a single look at me. I was dying for his single glance at me but he was ignoring me like I didn’t even exist.

His ignorance towards me pushing the memories of my childhood in front of me. The memories where I would be locked in a room, inside the darkness, breathing in it, living in it, making it an acquaintance, worried about the monsters that they might come and eat me. But then after some time wondering how wonderful it would have been if those monsters really exist.

Then I would have made them my friend. I would have felt less lonely. To be honest, the classroom was much more lonely than those dark rooms. But he was the only person I could tell this.

I tried to apologize to him, running behind him for forgiveness, saying sorry.
but he won’t even listen to me, leaving me alone behind him, among my monsters.

The next day I tried to talk to him by asking him a question and he said,"Miss. Dhairya, Can you help Miss Arya in this matter?"

Everyday, I thought, was I so bad that he won’t even look at me and talk to me? I felt an empty pit in my heart getting wider. Once again the flowers that were recently fulminated in my heart were withering without his attention and his care.

When I sat alone in my room. I used to contemplate that it was what I wanted from forever, I wanted to be alone, I wanted him to leave me on my own. Then why was I hurting so much? Why was the process of him ignoring me so heart breaking for me?

Everyone had ignored me since childhood I didn’t care. Then why when he did the same I was feeling like the world had lost all its colour? For three- four days I tried to apologize to him. But when I could not achieve his forgiveness. I was sure he didn’t need me anymore. He must have gotten tired of me.

To be continued...

<————««Author's Note<————««

❖I felt pretty emotional writing this chapter.

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Today's Song

Bhare Naina

by Nandini Srikar

(A must listen song 🎵, It's really great)