"Hey. Hey. Look at me." I hear Jay's panicked voice say. His voice seems so distant but from the blurry vison of my eyes I know he is right in front of me. "Indy, breathe with me. Come on." I feel his hand touch my hand that is on my knee. A choked sob escapes my throat. "Ace! Come here! Ace!" I hear him yell.

My throat closes up more and I can't seem to see anymore, all I can see is my dad. I feel someone shake me, trying to get me back to my 'senses, but I can't. All voices around me go distant. Everything around me is black and right in front of me is my dad. He has a scowl on his face as he is looking at me. A sob breaks through me and I try to reach for him but I can't. I can't.

I suddenly feel someone lick my face, and then I feel something furry rub against my knee. My hand reaches for it, and my hands go into Ace's fur, gently pulling on to it as I try to calm myself. My vison clears and I see Jay's worried face and Ace who is right next to me.

I start taking deep breaths, my hand still pulling on Ace's fur and a few minutes later I can feel my heart beating normally, and my lungs filling up. "Hey." Jay says softly, kneeling in front of me. "H-Hi." I say, using my other hand to wipe face from all the tears that managed to fall down. "You okay? Want to talk about it?" He asks and I shake my head. He nods understandingly before pulling me into a hug, my head presses against his chest, and I can feel his heart beating frantically.

"W-Why is your h-heart beating so f-fast?" I ask with furrowed eyebrows, as my hand fists around his shirt, my voice croaky. "I am scared. You weren't able to breath Indy. I was so goddamn scared." He whispers. "I-I am sorry." I whisper. "It's not your fault." He says softly, before kissing my head.

"He was here, Jay." I mumble. "It felt like he was here. It was so real." I whisper as a sob breaks through me. "H-He was talking to me. A-About h-his day at work... a-and then suddenly he v-vanished. A-And I looked around f-for him and e-everything turned black and h-he was there again. H-He was looking at m-me. I tired reaching f-for him, b-but I couldn't. I couldn't, Jay." I say as sobs start escaping my throat.

"Shhh. He wasn't here. It wasn't real." He whispers. "I miss him." I admit, as a tear falls down my cheek. "Me too. I miss him too." He whispers and I fell a tear drop on my head. My eyebrows furrow and I pull away and look up at him. His eyes are closed, and his Adam's apple is bobbing up and down, a tear has trailed down his cheek.

I remove my hand from Ace's fur and use it to wipe his tear away. His eyes open and he looks at me with a sad smile. "You okay now?" He asks and I nod. He grins and then wipes my tears away from his own hands. "You better acknowledge Ace now, or he is going to have a fit." Jay jokes and I chuckle before turning to Ace who is looking at me.

"Hey buddy." I say with a smile. He lets out a whine kind of thing before cuddling his nose in my hair and I giggle. My head rubs his back and he slightly licks my cheek. He pulls away and looks at me with his tongue hanging out of his mouth.

"I am fine." I say and kiss the spot between his ears. He barks softly before lying down and plopping his head on my leg. I stretch my legs, making him comfier. My eyes dart to my window and they widen when I see Austin standing in front of his window looking at me with a worried look, his jaw clenched and his muscles seem tense. From where I am sitting, he can see me very clearly and he probably saw what just happened to.

"Should I get you some water?" Jay asks. My eyes move back to Jay and I nod slightly. "Yes please." I say. Jay nods before getting up and walking out my room. My eyes dart back to Austin's window only this time I can't see him because he has closed his curtains.

I have been tutoring Austin for almost two weeks now. It had become like a routine now; everyday after school I would walk to Macy's and wait for Austin to come, sometimes he would be late for practice but I would spend that time either reading or completing homework, after he would come I would tutor him for over two hours and then he would drop me home on his bike.

We were more comfortable around each other now and conversations weren't awkward anymore, at least most of them. He didn't like talking about himself a lot though; but I got to know a few things about him here and there through his actions: for instance, he didn't like coffee one bit, he loved dogs, he is very focused when he had to be, and he doesn't let people in easily. Also, he loved croissants. Or at least he loves the one at Macy's.

Austin had dropped me off home just about an hour or two ago from our tutoring session today, he even came in for a few minutes and played with Ace before going back home. I had come up to my room later and was looking through my drawers when I stumbled across a picture. Not just any picture; a picture of me and my dad. It was of my 12th birthday, he was side hugging me and I remember he was telling me a joke while this picture was taken, my eyes were up at him and my arms around him, I was laughing at the joke he probably said.

It had been my favorite picture from that day and I got dad to frame it and I used to keep in on my nightstand, until I removed it and put it in my drawer, I suppose. That picture lead to my panic attack I had a few minutes ago. The memory ran through my head and before I knew it, I feel down from my chair and it started.

Jay must have heard some noise since he was in his room, which happens to be right next to mine.

"Here. Also mom just came, I haven't told her yet about what happened. I expect you to tell her." He says sternly as he hands me a glass of water and my eyes widen. "Let's not tell her... Please. I don't want to stress her out." I plead as I take the glass of water from him. "You wont stress her out. Tell her, she has the right to know." He says

I sigh, knowing I can't argue any further and I take a sip of my water. "Where are your pills?" He asks, as he picks up the photo frame that was fallen to the ground, he makes sure he doesn't look at it as he places it deep down in my drawer.

"Jay, I don't need those pills." I sigh. "I don't care. Your having them, I am not risking anything." He says as he starts looking for the pills. "Jay, I am fine. I promise, if something happens, I will have those pills." I say as I put my glass down on the floor next to me and start petting Ace on his head.

Jay stops rummaging through my stuff and turns towards me, as if debating on whether to say yes or no. "Fine." He finally says. And I give him a small smile. "Indy! Jay! Where are you?" I hear mom ask from downstairs. "In Indy's room. We have something to tell you." Jay calls out.

My smile drops. I hear footsteps approaching my room before the door opens and my mom walks in, still in her work clothes. "Indy, Jay, what's going on?" She asks with furrowed eyebrows when she sees me on the floor.

Jay looks at me with a raised eyebrow, telling me to tell mom. I gulp and look at mom, "I had a panic attack." I whisper. "What? How? You haven't had one in three months. Jay, how bad was it?" My mom asks with wide eyes as she looks between Jay and I.

"She found a picture of her... and dad in her drawer, it triggered memories, I think. I hear a loud bang noise and came in immediately. She was on the floor, and she was holding her neck. I tired helping her but I couldn't, I ended up calling Ace." He mumbles, as he looks at my mom.

"It was bad?" My mom asks and just as I am about to object and say it wasn't, Jay speaks. "It was bad. She... She couldn't breath and I got so scared. We were luckily able to stop before..." He trails off and my mom closes her eyes and sighs.

"Indy." She whispers once she opens her eyes. "I promise I am fine." I assure. "Are you sure?" She asks and I nod. "Fine." She sighs, just then her phone starts ringing. She looks at the caller id, before looking at us apologetically. "I have to take this." She says and we nod. She smiles at us before picking up the phone and walking out the room.

A few seconds later, I see Jay's hand come in front of me. I look up at him confused. "Get up." He says softly and I smile and take his hand. I carefully make sure, that Ace, who is now sleeping doesn't get hurt when I get up.

Once I am up on my feet Jay lets go of my hand. He still looks a bit worried and I complete understand why, but he doesn't have to be so worried. "Stop worrying." I say. "You're my twin Indy. Of course, I will worry. Seeing you like that hurts me more than you know." He says softly. My eyes soften at that.

♡♡♡

I am just getting into bed when my phone rings. I pick up my phone with furrowed eyebrows and read the caller id, 'Ryan'. A smile makes it way as I pick up the video call. "Hey!" I smile. "Hi." He says, a little smile on his face. "How are you?" I ask as I get into my comforters and lie down in my comfy bed. "I am doing great. How are you?" He asks, with a chuckle. "Good." I smile.

He nods, before he becomes silent for a few seconds. "Mom told me about your panic attack." He finally says. "Oh." I say. "Indy, was it bad? Do I need to come there? Just say the word and I will be on my way." He says. "It was fine Ryan. Don't worry. You don't have to come here I am fine." I say with a smile.

"Mom said it was pretty bad. She said it was a close call Indy." He whispers. "I am fine. You don't have to worry." I say. "I have the whole rights to worry. Last time you had a bad panic attack you had to go to the hospital and I was all the way in college and no one told me till the next morning. I want to be there for you." He says looking at me, his eyebrows slightly furrowed.

"I know... But this wasn't so bad. It was okay. I am okay." I smile. "I hate him for what he did to you. To us." I hear him whisper. None of us say anything for a while. "I am coming over this weekend. I miss you guys, haven't seen you in weeks." He finally says and I smile. "I can't wait." I smile.

He chuckles and then we talk for about half an hour before the both of us hang up. I put my phone on my nightstand and I make sure Ace is asleep on his dog bed which is on the floor next to my bed.

I close my eyes and soon after, I fall asleep.

♡♡♡

Here I am at Macy's, after school, waiting for Austin like I do every day. It's a Thursday today, so he has practice. I am reading a book that I purchased just three days ago and I am almost done with it.

My eyes move around the page, and my hand pushes up my glasses sometimes, when I feel like they are slipping of. I have a cup of coffee in front of me and I tied my hair in a messy bun not to long ago when it kept falling in front of my face, hence irritating me when I was reading.

I hear the familiar chime of the door and I slowly lift my eyes off my book and look up, where I see Austin walking towards the table I am currently sitting at. His hair is slightly wet, probably from the shower and his face has a blank look as he walks towards the table.

Austin saw me having a panic attack yesterday, and I honestly have no clue what to tell him. I am hoping he won't ask anything about it and just pretend he didn't see it.

He pulls his chair out and takes a seat, dropping his bag next to his leg. "Hi." He says. "Hi." I say giving him a small smile. His eyes dart down to my lips, before moving up to my eyes. "What are we doing today?" He asks as he leans in his chair. I close my book, making sure to bookmark the page I was on before looking at him.

"Well, we have an English test coming, maybe we can study for that?" I ask. "Sure." He nods. "Also, tomorrow we have to work on our book report. All of us are done with it, we just have to take parts out and make it one." I say and he nods. "I'll just go get myself something to eat." He mentions before getting up and going to order.

I nod, a small smile on my face since I know he is going to get his usual croissant. I find his love towards croissant's kind of cute. It seems like his stress revealing food. I start to take whatever books we may need out of my bag, just as Austin comes back and takes a seat.

He takes his books out too and then we start looking through our notes and I explain stuff to him he doesn't understand or has a doubt in. Soon after his croissant comes and we both don't say a lot, other then a few words here and there.

I am taking a sip out of my coffee when Austin clears his throat, looking at me almost hesitantly. "Yes?" I ask as I place my cup back on the table. "I... I have a game this Friday. Basically tomorrow." He mentions. Oh, Jay didn't mention anything yet. I usually end up going to Jay's game, and sometimes even mom comes if she doesn't have work.

"Oh. Okay." I nod. "Um... I was kind of hoping  you would come?" He asks. My heart starts beating faster at that for some reason. "Of course! I go to most of Jay's games anyway." I say and his face seems to drop slightly. "Right. Yeah. Of course." He nervously says, avoiding eye contact. My eyebrows furrow in confusion, but I don't say anything.

He then goes back to answering the questions I had given him. His eyebrows furrow as he starts writing down the answers. Just as I am about to go back to my notebook, I see him drop his pencil and sigh. My eyes snap to his and I see him looking at me intensely. "I... I saw you have that panic attack yesterday." He says, his voice barely a whisper as his eyes move around my face. I see a hint of concern in them.

I gulp and avoid eye contact, fiddling with the pencil in my hands. "I didn't mean to pry... I just happened to be at my window and then... I saw you have a panic attack..." He trails of, looking at me as if hesitant to say anything else. "Yeah." I nod. "I completely understand if you don't want to talk about this... But does it happen often? You don't have to answer, only if you want to." He asks, his voice so soft, it's almost unrecognizable.

"It used to... But not recently no." I shrug as I finally look at him. He nods and doesn't question further, for which I am glad, because I don't think I am ready to open up, at least not yet.

X-X-X

Heyyy!

Yes, I updated.

I hope you liked this chapter!

Anyway, hope are y'all doing? I am doing great and recovering fast. 

Please make sure to vote and comment, makes my day.

Now I know it may seem like this is going slow, but that's how they are. It's going to take them time to open up.

Both are insecure and are not ready yet. But I promise to make some progress between them, soon enough.

Anyway, I don't know when I will update next, but see y'all in the next chapter.

Love,

Your Author Human <3