Chapter 15: "I am scared Indy. So, fucking scared."

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Three days have passed since the day Austin dropped me off. Jay and I... We haven't exactly been on speaking terms; he ends up ignoring me whenever I talk to him and whenever he talks to me it's only about how I shouldn't hangout with Austin.

He went as far as talking to Ryan and telling him I am getting 'involved' with a guy I shouldn't be getting involved with. So yesterday when Ryan talked to me, he gave me a whole lecture on how 'boys' are stupid and I shouldn't waste my time on them, I was very mad at Jayden and I haven't even tried to talk to him since.

Right now, sitting in my room, wearing one of Ryan's old hoodie after coming home from tutoring Austin I am reading this new book I had ordered and had arrived just a day ago. My hand goes into the bag of chips I was having only to notice it was empty.

I groan slightly just as Ace and Jay enter the room. I don't say anything to Jay, and I pretend to just continue reading as Ace jumps on my bed and makes his head comfortable on my thighs.

"Indy..." I hear Jay say but I ignore him. "Indy, please. I know you probably don't want to talk to me but just hear me out." He pleads and I sigh, marking my page number before closing my book down on my night stand.

"Go on." I mumble. "I... I am sorry." He starts as he takes a seat on the edge of the bed, before sighing and looking at me. "I am sorry that I acted like an asshole. Your right, your now grown up and hell we are the same age and I shouldn't have acted... so controlling, it wasn't right." He speaks.

Before I could say anything, he continues speaking. "I am scared Indy. So, fucking scared." He mumbled and lets out a dry chuckle. He looks me in the eye before sighing. "I am scared that once you fall in love and get a boyfriend... You will forget me. You might replace me. You're my best friend Indy, my other half and my twin. You're my favorite person in the whole world who I can count on, I am closer to you than anyone else. It's always been us Indy, the both of us, even Ryan knows that. I am just scared after a boy comes in your life... He will start to become your best friend and that you would talk to him more than me and I am scared we will lose our bond.

"Fuck, I know Austin is good for you. I see the way he looks at you most times. You guys may have not realized it yet but God, you both look at each other like love struck fools or something, like half of the time you guys just stare at each other as if taking in the most beautiful thing you have seen. I am scared that one day you realize just how much you love each other and then I won't matter anymore." He mumbles, staring down at his feet, a sad smile on his face.

"Jay..." I whisper, tears almost coming to my eyes. "You're my twin. No one. And I mean no one can take your place. You're always going to be my best friend, my brother, my other half no matter what. No boy can change that. Jay, don't you ever think I will replace you because I won't. You mean the world to me and I love you the most in the world. And even if I do fall in love with a boy Jay, its going to be another kind of love. I am going to love you both differently and never am I going to replace you." I say and crawl to where he is, before hugging him.

He wraps his arms around me and puts his head in the crook of my neck, "I am sorry, its just that ever since Dad left... I feel so... abandoned and I am scared that one of you will just walk away anytime like he did and I don't think I can lose another person who I love." He whispers and I feel a tear touch my skin.

"Jay." I say, closing my eyes and hugging him tighter, breathing heavily. "I am not going anywhere alright; I am right here." I whisper as I stroke his hair. "I know." He mumbles.

"Also, just because I approve of Austin doesn't mean I won't be over-protective and give him a tough time. If he really wants my sister, he will have to fight both her brothers and if he does only then is he worthy of you. And if he even dares pull any shit that hurts you or makes you feel bad about yourself you better beat him up and then give him to us so that we kill him." He says quietly and I chuckle slightly. "Don't worry, that won't be happening. I am quite positive we won't date at all." I speak.

Austin could never like me. We are almost two different people, while he likes to remain calm and quiet, I like to be cheery and love to rant most times, we are like two polar opposites.

"Yeah right. That's what you say now. The way you guys look at each other tells me you will be dating each other very soon." He says and I rolled my eyes. "I could say the same about you and Paris." I say and I know he is blushing. "Shut up." He mumbles as he pulls away when Ace starts barking at the lack of attention he is getting right now.

"Attention whore." Jay grumbles but pets Ace anyway. "Hey! Don't call my dog that!" I exclaim as I push his shoulder playfully. Jay smirks at me before Ace and him start wrestling and attacking each other, I think

My eyes dart to my window and I see Austin standing there in front of his window looking at us. I give him a small smile and wave and I expect him to just close his curtains on he did the last time, but to my surprise he gives me a small smile and wave too which causes me to blush.

♡♡♡

Friday morning, I am woken up to the worst surprise ever: my period.

During my period I tend to get very emotional, sensitive, moody and because of my stomach craps and all I don't feel like eating one bit. Whenever I am on my period, everyone leaves me alone in my room, letting me watch Netflix or read books and then a week later I am back to myself.

As I put my clothes on, a dull look on my face due to my current dislike towards the whole world I notice a small pimple on my forehead. "Great," I mutter to myself sarcastically as I lean closer to the mirror to have a better look at the pimple that has decided to house itself on my face.

To hide it slightly I leave my hair open and pull some part of my hair in the front. I then walk down stairs and am greeted with the smell of bacon and eggs. "This smells yummy," I tell my mom as I walk into the kitchen. "Thank you honey," My mom smiles looking at me.

Her smile drops and her eyes move around my face. "Its that time of the month, isn't it?" She sighs and I frown. "How did you know?" I ask. "It's written all of your face, dear," she says and I scowl. "Kidding, but I am your mother, I can read you like a book." She chuckles and I roll my eyes slightly.

"Hey little sis," Jayden says walking into the kitchen and ruffling my hair causing me to groan as I fix it. "Nuh uh, Jay don't annoy your sister right now. She's on her period." My mom whispers the last part to Jayden causing his eyes to widen.

"Well, uh oh, the monster has been unleashed huh?" He mumbles and I glare at him. He raises his hands up in mock surrender before we all eat breakfast.

♡♡♡

"We are here," Jay says pulling my attention of my phone as I look in front of us at the school parking lot. "Also, I have a game tonight," Jay mentions. "Oh okay, cool. We will be there." I nod not knowing what else to say. "Um, I want to ask Paris to wear my jersey." He mumbles and I see his cheeks turn pink.

"Oh my god! Is the ship finally sailing?" I ask with excitement. "No, no it's not that I just wanted to ask you if you were fine with it, since she is your best friend... Its just recently I figured out I kind of like her and I was... just you know hoping she would wear my jersey but I don't know how to ask... and then I didn't want to upset you..." He trails of.

"Oh my god! My little brother has a crush!" I squeal. "Hey! I am not younger, you are!" He argues. "By 2 minutes." I speak. "2 minutes and 16 seconds!" He says and I scoff.

"Fine," I mumble. And he grins. "Also, I am fine with you asking Paris to wear your jersey, more than fine actually as long as you don't hurt her in anyway." I smile.

"Great, and don't worry I won't hurt her, I like her too much to do so." he says and I awe internally before we both get out of the car and walk towards the school building.

We part ways to go to our respective lockers and as I am opening my own locker Paris walks up to me. "Hi!" She smiles and I smile back. "You seem in a good mood." I notice. "Yep. My brother is going to this camp thing for school for like a week and I have my house to myself! How great is that?!" She exclaims and I chuckle. "That's nice. I really don't get why Marcus and you hate each other so much." I tell her, referring to her 12-year-old brother.

"He is just a brat that's why," She rolls her eyes and opens her own locker. I laugh slightly before closing my locker. I turn around only to be met by a chest right in front of me. I look up at see Austin and I see his hand slightly raised up as if to maybe pat my shoulder.

"Oh, um hi." He mumbles, taking a small step back to put some distance between us. "H-Hi." I blush. "So... Uh can I like borrow your notes... I still need to catch up on all I missed out on while I was suspended." He speaks. "Yeah, yeah sure. Can I give my notes to you after school?" I ask. "Of course. Thank you." He says giving me a small smile.

"No problem." I say and I see him nod before rolling his bottom lip inside his mouth and his eyes go up and down my frame causing me to blush.

Austin freaking Reed is checking me out!

He clears his throat and looks away, his ears slightly pink. "You... You look great today. I mean you do every day- I didn't mean it like that-" I cut him off. "I know what you mean. And thank you." I smile softly and he flashes me a small nervous smile back before taking a few steps back. "Um yeah, anyway see you later." He says and gives me a small wave, I wave back and look at his retracing figure walking away.

"OH MY GOD! He checked you out!" Paris squeals once he is gone. "Shut up." I mumble and blush. "Oh my god! Gah! I can just picture your babies already!" She fangirls and I push her slightly.

"Stop." I mumble and she laughs. "Come on, lets go to class." She says and I nod.

♡♡♡

After school I am waiting for Austin in the parking lot to come out and collect my notes before the both of us walk to Macy's where Alec is waiting for us. I thought we could maybe complete more of our group task and they all agreed.

I see Austin walking out and he looks around for me before spotting me. I wave and he nods before walking in my direction. "Hi!" I smile. "Hey." He says giving me a small smile too making my heart beat faster.

I don't think I will ever get used to him smiling at me. "Here are all the notes you may need to catch up on." I say handing him the notes in my hand. "Thank you. I will give them to you by tomorrow." He says and I nod.

"We should start going to Macy's Alec is waiting for us." I say and he nods. He opens his bag and places the notes in before zipping it and slinging it over his shoulder. We then walk to Macy's.

Austin said that we will take his bike later on from the parking lot so that he could drop us home.

As we are walking to Macy's we talk about random stuff and I even manage to get him to laugh a few times. The whole time our hands are brushing against each other and I so badly just wanted to hold it but I stopped myself from doing so.

X-X-X

(No GIF for this chapter, since I couldn't find any :<)

Heyy guys!

Alright, I know this chapter wasn't great, it was more of a filler chapter and I apologize.

I hope you found it okay. Pls vote and comment, even though this chapter pretty much sucked :<

Anyway, I promise the next chapter will be slightly better.

Hope u all are fine and safe.

See you guys soon, maybe Friday or maybe before that idk. But there may be an early update idk.

Love,

Your Author, Human <3

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