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💫ANGEL💫


WALKING UP TO MY FRONT DOOR, my phone buzzed. Quickly removing it from my pocket, Giselle's name popped up, along with a message, "can't make it tonight. Sorry." I exhaled loudly, resting my forehead on the door. She was pulling out of the bet? I wanted to counter with a smart-ass comeback, but I didn't. I took my keys out and let myself inside.

No lie, I felt let down as disappointment buried every ounce of happiness I had in me from the day. I felt the storm clouds rolling in, darkening my world with the same familiar misery that had become my normal. I couldn't allow it. There was no way a woman had so much control over my emotions that, without her, I melted back into a puddle of nothingness. There was no way I would become that person. So, I shook it off. Reminding myself that Giselle, too, was in this with every inch of her heart and parameter of her mind. If she cancelled, something important must have come up and that's just that.

Heading to the fridge, I looked to see what was left for me to eat without having to cook. An Enchilada from Monday was at the top of my options. Other than that, it was Ramen or boiled eggs. That was all I knew how to make. Again, my phone buzzed, "Call me when you can", popped up from Lee. I thought about a few scenarios in which she needed a to speak to me as soon as possible. There weren't many of importance, other than anything involving my parents. So, I called.

"What's up, Lee?" I sighed, slouching down on the couch.

"I need you to pull up during Christmas break." She got straight to the point. "It's really important, man."

"What's going on?"

"A lot." She sighed. "It's a family matter, so just set it up and make it happen."

"Cool. Anything I need to know at this moment?"

"Nah. I'd rather wait until you get home. But so you don't go on a worry spree, making up all types of crazy shit in your head, it's not life or death, just things that need to be addressed and corrected."

"Cool. I'll let you know once I set it up."

"Perfect. How's school?"

"It's going well. Perfect GPA."

"Sounds about right. You were always brains and brawn." Lee joked.

"Nah, that's all you." I countered, finishing with, "So...I was thinking...I want to bring Giselle home." Waiting for a response felt like an eternity of bliss. My heart was pounding harder than a butcher tenderizing his heart out. As I held my breath, anticipating a certain response, I began to wish I hadn't submitted the unnecessary warning. And then...

"Holy shit! She's cracked the code. She's annihilated the annihilator. Are you fucking serious?"

"Lee." I sighed, shaking my head as if she could see the disapproval through the phone.

"Hey. I'm happy for you, bro. It's been a long time coming."

"For real?"

"Hell yeah! I got tired of you Macking all the bitches and breaking all the hearts. More hoes for me now."

"I hate you."

"I love you too. So, I'll be seeing you and Ms. Giselle for Christmas break, then?"

"Indeed."

"Fab. I'll talk to you later. Don't forget to get the details to me. When you're coming? What you need help with? You know...all the deets."

"I got you, Lee. Love you."

"Love you too, bro."

Placing my phone face down on the counter, something I'd become accustomed to since having Giselle around all the time, I dug into the enchilada. About halfway through devouring the only choice I had for a pitiful meal, a knock at the door threw me off track. Rushing over to see who it could be, I remember finding a slight smirk growing as I thought maybe she'd changed her mind. Or maybe she lied to throw me off and wanted to surprise me with her presence on this night. Once the door swung open, I realized I was way off. It wasn't Giselle at all, there stood V, smile intact, eyes on her prize, and full of that vibrant energy I'd always loved her for.

"V?"

"Expecting somebody else?" She hissed, shouldering past me as she invited herself in.

"Yeah. Actually I-" I closed the door and followed behind her.

"Ooh. Enchiladas? I know damn well you didn't cook this." Laughing as she turned to face me, her smile disappeared as she witnessed the disappointed expression on my face.

"What?"

"Well, damn. I don't think I've ever seen you unhappy to see me."

"I'm not unhappy to see you. I just thought you—"

"Thought I was Little Miss Sunshine?"

"V, I—"

"No. No. It's cool. I know you two are together, spending all your time together and shit." Forcing a smile onto her lips, she turned away from me. For some reason, I felt like a total dick, breaking her once again. No matter how much V tried to hide herself from me, it was like, after that one day, kicking her out and "partying" all night with Giselle, I sensed every emotion that existed within her. Even the ones she tried to keep from me. V cared. She may have not wanted anything extra from me in the beginning, but that just wasn't the case anymore. She was expectant, let down at times, lifted at others. And every time I rejected her, I had to watch her break and shatter into even more pieces that would be nearly impossible to put back together.

"I'm sorry, V. I really don't want everything to change between us. If we can just stay friends, I think everything would work out in both of our favor."

"What are you talking about?"

I noticed that look. The one where she prayed I would stop talking and just let things be. But how could I? We'd invested too much of ourselves in this situation-ship, pretending, as we eased our pains and pleased ourselves. Now there we stood, troubled, awkward, as tension festered an unforgivable smog throughout my living room.

"I just want us to be okay."

"We are. I swear. I don't care about what you have going on. I just want to stay friends."

"And that we shall." I grinned, knowing better, feeling different, wanting it to be real.

I walked over to the kitchen counter to finish my food. V watched my every move, still holding on to that fake smirk. I tried ignoring it, pretending furthermore. It wasn't working. Everything was different. All of a sudden, the girl I fucked on a regular, chilled with on the daily, enjoyed whole-heartedly, was no longer needed. Hardly wanted. And I couldn't help but feel that she felt that.

"Why weren't you at Loki's today?" I mumbled through a mouthful.

"I was at the toy drive. I was surprised not to see you there, actually."

"Toy drive?"

"Yeah. The sorority and fraternity threw a toy drive today. Collecting toys for less fortunate families. Giselle and Roman put it together."

"Roman?" When I couldn't hide my frown and she couldn't hide the pleasure of it's appearance, I realized she found satisfaction in my reaction. That was strike one.

"I thought you knew. I'm sorry."

No. She wasn't sorry at all. She was sorry as hell for intentionally drawing out my jealousy. If Giselle had put together an event like that without inviting me, of course it would be because Roman was involved. We didn't get along. It was no secret. But her sorority was also a business move. We'd talked about it a time or two. She needed those points to take the steps that she'd planned for her future. So, if her and Roman put an event together, or course it would be a bad idea to invite me. I would have preferred she told me, but to hell with it. I trusted her. And that was the part V would never understand.

"It's cool." I brushed past her, flopping down onto the couch.

"Wow!"

"Shut up!"

"You're changing, dude."

"Yeah, so?"

"So...are you in love?"

I quickly looked over in her direction, expecting to find a distasteful look, but only finding a curious one. Locking eyes, neither of us looked away. Our slow, painful breaths revealed the fear we both carried from the truth being spoken. Although we were both fearful of two completely different things, it didn't change the fact that, both, V and I were undeniably afraid to hear those words aloud. So, I said nothing. And sooner than later, she stopped expecting me to.

"Come sit down." I patted the space next to me on the couch.

"Why?" She frowned.

"So, we can talk, duh."

"About?"

"V."

"Talk about what?"

And this is why she would never amount to more than what she already was. Hearing my tone, seeing my expression, understanding the situation we were in, why couldn't she just submit to my masculinity and let me lead? Why did she need an explanation, knowing we were in a place that two friends would never make it out of if our issues weren't corrected. All I wanted to do was set boundaries, apologize for leading her on, clear the air on her end and mine. But no. V wanted to make the problems larger than they were.

"Can you just come over here, sit down, and talk to me? That's all I'm asking, Vanessa."

"Oh, woah! Vanessa?" She laughed.

"Fuck it!" Frustrated, feeling the need to smoke and lie down, I got up from the coach, and headed towards my room. Only, once I passed by her, she hooked her hand into my arm, pulling me towards her. There I went, crashing into the warmth of her body, pressing up against the body that I once vandalized with pleasure. The familiarity of two empty souls, aiding in temporary fulfilment. Except, my soul was no longer empty. My soul no longer needed that temporary fix. I was full. I found life. I found love. And there she stood, even more hurt than before.

"I'm sorry." She whispered onto my lips as I peered down at her.

"For what?" I groaned, trying hard not to allow myself to be pulled in.

"It all."

"Me too."

"I love you, Angel." She cried out.

Before I could do or say anything else. Before I could breathe, blink, shy away, or correct her, my front door swung open. My head turned quickly, and as soon as I saw those bright blue eyes dim down into the darkness of condemnation, I detached myself from Vanessa, putting as much space between us as I could. As if that would make any of this look better. Nervously, I ran my fingers through my hair, shifting my weight from the left foot to the right, waiting. What did she think? How would she react?

"Well, two's a party, but three's a crowd." She joked, stepping inside and closing the door behind herself.

I noticed both hands and arms we occupied by bags of, what looked to be, groceries. So, I quickly ran to her side, to take the load off. Surprisingly, she flashed a pleasant glance, checking me out as her eyes traveled up and down my body. Once her eyes met mine, I winked.

"I got that, baby."

She simply hummed, "mm-hmm"

Mm-hmm? What the hell did that mean?

"Thanks. For a minute, I thought I lost feeling in my arms." She laughed, glancing over at V. "Hey, gorgeous. Didn't expect to see you here."

"Yeah, I stopped by on my way to my apartment. You know, to make sure he was still in one piece."

"Oh, yeah? What's your analysis? Is he well?"

"Hell no!" V laughed. My eyes ping ponged between the two of them. I wasn't sure If I was in the middle of an inside joke or if I should start fearing for my life.

"He'll be fine." Giselle smiled at me, giving a look that caused me to second guess everything. I placed the groceries down on the countertop. Then turned to face her again. The entire time I watched as she spoke to V without blame or suspicion or hate. Like everything was normal. Truth is, this was far from normal, and I, honestly, began feeling uncomfortable. Uneasy.

One thing for sure, Giselle's kindness was pure. It was genuine. I'd seen her fake it before, and this wasn't it. For all I knew, she thought she walked in on something that shouldn't be going on, yet she was smiling and joking with the woman who was to blame for it all. Or was this a part of both their plan? Was I being left out of some kind of loop? Was I the center of some sort of devised strategy between the two of them? What the fuck was going on?



***Author's Words****

Thank you for your patience. 


I've taken the time to edit and rewrite these last few chapters, ensuring that I give Angel and Giselle the ending they deserve. 

I hope you all like the direction it's going in, building something incredible for Part II

Please leave comments/critiques/suggestions

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