My hot cheeks and tight fists could easily give away the fact that I was behind frustrated. I tried to fight the urge to punch the guy next to me until he bleeds from every part of his body, walk back to his house, rip off my uncomfortable clothes, and go to bed with the only person I can count on- Jacob(a seven-year-old boy).

The devil sitting next to me held the wheel with much force while driving. When he turned to his right to meet my gaze with his heated eyes, I found myself fighting for air.

And as the loss of air spread throughout my lungs, I applied more and more pressure on my body, trying to stop my heart from beating so fast against my chest.

We reached the party with my dead lungs and his white knuckles.

I walked towards the huge house with the loud music when I felt someone gripping my hand aggressively from behind. My wrist shook slightly with pain as I remembered the last time he held me what way.

A few moments after I entered Logan's car, with the innocent thought that Noah was off my back. Little did I know that he planned to drag me out of Logan's car while throwing warnings at the poor guy.

"Don't take any drinks from strangers. If you have to pee, bring a friend to the bathroom with you. Don't kiss, sleep around, or do anything irresponsible," Noah murmured in my ear wickedly.

I laughed in anger.

"Don't tell me what to do."

"I am not fucking joking here, princess. I will not be around to keep an eye on you all night."

"Logan will keep an eye on me," I informed him with a winning smile. What I didn't expect was his tighter grip around my wrist.

"That piece of shit can't even keep an eye on himself," he spat the words disrespectfully.

"Don't talk about him like that!" I exclaimed.

"Don't defend him. I already told you, that idiot doesn't deserve you."

"Who deserves me then, Noah?"

In response to his firm silence, I examined our surroundings to find people watching us in awe. I lowered my head in embarrassment and walked away to the terrifying party, feeling awful.

He can't tell me what to do.

He can't make people believe that something is going on between us when all we want is to choke each other to death.

He can't control my heart and mess with my head.

He- I need to stay away from him.

So, my first step towards freedom and peace was to find Logan. To look for the guy who makes me feel normal and calm- the perfect combination.

I hated being tested under the eyes of my classmates while walking around an unfamiliar place, but I had to ignore my discomfort and surround myself with some sober people.

"I am sorry about Noah," I told Logan shamefully the second I reached him.

"I heard that you guys kissed outside, is it true?" his voice was unsteady, and the look on his face provided me with all the information I needed to know.

I wasn't happy when I figured that Logan wasn't exactly sober, but he was a good dancer, and that's all that mattered at that moment.

We danced for what felt like hours.

For once, I lost myself in the music and not in my complicated thoughts.

Viv joined us at some point, and when she disappeared with Marcus, Logan saw it as a chance to wrap his arms around my waist and lean towards my lips. My bubble of happiness exploded the second I understood his intentions, and I had to get away from him.

"I-I have to use the bathroom," I managed to utter the lamest excuse out of my mouth and ran away with the big hole in my heart.

I washed my face when I reached the bathrooms, trying to calm myself down and forget about my almost first kiss. I was proud of myself for not wasting that kiss on a guy I barely knew, yet I still couldn't manage to relax completely.

I headed back in hopes to locate Viv, leave the freaking party and never come back, but when I saw the familiar figure waiting for me outside of the bathrooms, I knew why my body refused to let me relax.

Logan followed me.

My heart began to race, and my hands started to shake against my will. I had a terrible feeling that if I don't avoid him (and his creepy mind), things will go downhill fast.

I entered the bathrooms once again as quietly as I could to spot my savior wearing a large black hoodie. I never talked to the girl before, but my fear of communicating was nothing compared to my fear of facing Logan.

"Hey, I am sorry to disturb you, it's just that- umm- can I use your hoodie?"

The look on her gentle face gave away the fact that she felt sorry for me. I didn't appreciate the feeling of being under people, of being incapable and limited with my actions, but I was fighting for air by that point(for the second time today), and that sad feeling of being underestimated, just didn't matter.

She handed me her hoodie in a blink of an eye, and all I could do was thank her quietly and move on to the next stage of my plan.

I covered my face with the hood while I waited for someone to walk out of the bathrooms with me. Luckily, a tall girl(who I never met before) opened the exit door and disappeared from my sight. I began to pace towards her, making sure that I was the closest one to the wall so that she would hide me with her height.

Feeling the stress taking control over my body and slowly eating my insides, all I wanted when I passed him was to hold my breath and close my eyes, but I forced myself to keep on walking. My new favorite hoodie was probably doing a great job because I succeed in avoiding him and not dying in the process.

I didn't have the chance to steady my breathing before Viv appeared from behind me with an odd expression.

"Sky, I think you should-" she bit her pink lips, looking unsure and nervous.

"I should what?"

"See how Noah is doing?" the hesitation was thick in her voice. My thoughts about staying away from him drifted apart immediately.

"Why? What happened?"

"He drank more than he should have," she stated with a worried look, making my heart sink.

"Where is he?" I found it harder than expected to recognize my voice due to all the emotions it contained.

She pointed at the stairs leading to the second floor of the house. I paced towards these same stairs, but stopped once she whispered out my name almost dramatically.

"He asked for you."

Okay, so maybe the dramatic tone did fit the situation pretty well.

I tried not to overthink his request while I blindly walked closer to him. Opening the first door I noticed, my heart sank once again as a result of the view I revealed.

The guy who made every cell in my body burn with concern for him had his head inside the disgusting toilet.

The guy who made me feel things I didn't want to feel towards him was puking like there was no tomorrow.

And I stood there, not having the slightest clue on what to do or how to make him feel better. I recalled his anger towards me earlier that day, and so more than half of the things I had in mind were worthless.

He would probably reject my help like he always does when he gets mad.

"Noah, are you okay?"

His head snapped in my direction. The confused expression turned warm once he recognized me and made me magically forget about our fight from earlier. I entered the small place before I closed the door quietly. I gathered the courage and laid my little hand on his very tensed back.

Surprisingly enough, his back eased under my touch.

I looked into his eyes and knew that I would do anything it takes to know what's going on in his unreadable mind. 

~~~~~~~~~

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