Chapter Twelve

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It was Selene's first day back at work since meeting Gunnar and having two meltdowns.

But, today was different.

She felt that maybe God was with her.

However it worked, she would try and see later.

For now, she wanted to wear something outrageous.

Something out of the box.

"I think I've got some dresses," She murmured while twiddling her fingers to the soft piano music playing on her speaker.

She hadn't worn a dress, that her father didn't approve of, in fourteen years,

That was a memory she didn't ever want to come back to her mind.

Never.

She walked into her closet and pulled out a suitcase she hid.

It was hidden due to her being a creature of habit. And she was still a little afraid that her father would come and-no.

"No, Selene. No. Just pick a dress and wear it," She encouraged herself.

It was all so new to her.

Being positive, genuinely, and trying to be happy with herself and the choices she'd make.

There was no one yelling in her ear, no one whispering rude things, it was just her.

And maybe God too.

She unzipped the suitcase slowly and bit her lip to contain the feelings she had.

Her fingers traced each dress, remembering, and trying to forget.

"Oh, I have to wear this one,"

Her heart soared at the sight of a deep blue sundress she bought the day she found out that she was pregnant.

It was a spur-of-the-moment buy, she knew it would never be worn, but it was like a glimpse of hope.

For the future.

Her father always reminded her before she went shopping and after that dresses above the knee, even an inch, were for easy women.

That she would attract the wrong kind of men wearing them. That she was looking for trouble. And she would be responsible for the way men reacted to her wearing it, and if something happened, it was her fault because the dress was an open invitation.

The dress fell from her hands and she gripped her thigh. "Calm down, breathe." She said through gritted teeth.

The memories were awful. The words that were spoken.

No.

She picked up the dress and grabbed a cardigan as well.

"Maybe I can wear it," She said shakily.

It was one step closer to being confident with her choices. And pushing away what other people had to say.

After leaving the closet, Selene jumped in the shower and used a new rose-scented body wash and perfume.

This was her turning over a new leaf.

Trying to push through.

As she slipped into the dress, her heartbeat doubled.

Fear couldn't stop her.

Her father wasn't going to jump out of the shower and find her. And if he did, maybe she would say no to him.

"Yeah, I will." She said, her voice a little stronger this time.

Taking a quick breath, Selene turned to face herself in the mirror.

And she smiled, from her heart.

"I-i look lovely," Her heart was crying. Maybe this was also a step forward in reuniting with her youth.

She almost twirled to see her dress flow.

But she wasn't ready for that, not yet.

"It doesn't matter what they say or do, you're wearing this dress for you, Selene. And you deserve to feel lovely," She looked at herself once more and left the bathroom.

She couldn't constantly deny herself for the sake of not wanting to be responsible for the actions of adults.

It was a scary step, but maybe she could do it.

-

"I can do it," Selene said right before walking into the Autoshop.

As usual, eyes locked on her body, but something was different.

She looked around and noticed that the men were actually doing their jobs.

They weren't lazing around and talking.

"Galia, I forgot to t-"

Moses began to tell her but stopped abruptly.

The office door opened and Selene understood what was going on.

"It all seems orderly, but-" Gunnar's words drew short as he took a look at the woman before him.

She was beautiful. And something was different about her.

Selene instantly grew nervous under his gaze.

Why?

She didn't know, but the man was extra hot today.

Darn him for being attractive, but annoyingly strange.

"Hi, Galia." Gunnar said and held the office door open for her.

"Thank you," She answered quietly and speed-walked into the office, away from his stupid stare.

Once the door was shut, Selene closed her eyes and breathed for a moment.

She was confused about her reaction to the way Gunnar looked at her.

When any man in the shop looked at her she was disgusted. When Gunnar looked at her, she was flustered.

"And he looked me in the eyes," She whispered shocked, which added to her begrudgingly swoony state.

No.

She needed to get over herself.

There was work to be done and Gunnar's presence wouldn't stop her.

Two hours easily passed and Selene was beginning to forget that Gunnar was even around.

Until he came in.

"I don't mean to interrupt nothing, just checkin how you're feelin," Gunnar said, noting back to the day at Honeydew's house.

Selene's nails sunk into the desk and she forced a smile. "Oh, I'm better. Thank you," She wanted him to leave.

He was intimidating. And she couldn't help but wonder, would today be the day he broke character?

Would he try something?

It had to be the day she wore a dress.

Gunnar watched as Galia's smile fell and her eyes grew worried.

He hoped his timing wasn't off.

"I got somethin for you, I hope you don't mind, it matches your dress," He said cautiously.

Selene's brows furrowed.

He was trying something.

And her dress was blue, what matched blue?

It didn't matter.

Gunnar took the box out of his jacket pocket and placed it on the desk. "Don't think too much, but try to enjoy it. I do apologize if you get questionable or uncomfortable,"

He knew she was suspicious about his every action, but that couldn't, nor wouldn't stop him from pursuing her.

Selene eyed Gunnar and glanced at the small light blue box.

What was he up to?

She took the box and opened it slowly, just in case something popped out.

"Oh my word," She gasped faintly.

A Sapphire bracelet.

It was the most beautiful piece of jewelry she'd ever seen.

But why would Gunnar give her something so beautiful?

What was wrong with him? He barely knew her and it was certainly expensive.

She closed the box with a sigh.

"What is this for Gunnar? It's beautiful, but I can't take it. I-if you're trying something, to soften the blow, anything, please just be honest." She was trying not to categorize him as a pervert, buying her affection, but it seemed that way.

Gunnar was prepared to be honest with her. It was the only way she'd understand his actions now and further on if she allowed it.

"I won't lie to you, Galia."

Her heart dropped in disappointment.

"I was readin and saw a verse, 'poor Jerusalem storm-tossed and not comforted. I will set your stones in black mortar, and lay your foundations in lapis lazuli. I will make your fortifications out of rubies, your gates out of sparkling stones, and all your walls out of precious stones.'"

Her face was blank, but her eyes were frantic with confusion and insecurity.

He hated that she dealt with so much inside.

"I don't mean to be too forward, but if I may, I don't want nothin from you. I don't want to take nothin. I only want you to be open. To speak and know you're heard,"

Selene's mouth almost dropped.

She was shocked out of her mind. What the heck was going on? Was he proposing to her?

"W-what? In English, please,"

Gunnar laughed softly at the dove's confusion. He would make it clear.

"I care for you, about you. And I'm askin you to do nothin but be open, give me a try. Say no, yes, maybe, go away, but maybe consider bein open. I won't do nothin you don't like."

Now she was flabbergasted.

What on earth? He expected nothing in return?

Gunnar decided to save her from overprocessing in front of him. He knew she wouldn't like that.

"I'm gonna look round the shop, check things out. I'll come back to check on you. I don't need a answer," He nodded at her and left the office.

Things went well in his eyes.

She didn't immediately call him a freak or weirdo.

She seemed to receive it well. He knew it was something big to say, but he didn't want her to have a reason to question him.

He was an honest upfront man, he knew people didn't like it at times, but it was how God made him and he loved it.

But, as he told Galia, he was going to check on things around the shop.

"Where's Moses?" He murmured looking around.

He was supposed to be overseeing the work, making sure things didn't spiral out of control, but he wasn't.

Which stirred something in Gunnar.

Moses knew Gunnar was here, he was supposed to at least act as if he did his job.

Gunnar shook his head, hoping that his assumptions weren't true. Moses was an upright man.

"I mean, she shows up in the tiny little dress and doesn't expect us to break a 'rule' or two?" Byron, a worker said, catching Gunnar's attention.

There was a group of men, supposed to be working, talking like birds.

And Moses was with them drinking a beer and grinning.

Gunnar sighed but stayed where he was to give them a chance to prove they weren't slick-mouthed jackals.

"Right? Seems like she wore that dress to put the moves on boss. She never wore nothing like that and the day he shows up,"

"She didn't know, but it was a perfect 'coincidence'. I saw the way she looked at him and he was in that office for a while. Not to disrespect him, but she got hired the same day, and he always calls to check if his rules are still in order. I mean, I would too, nobody would touch that if I was on it," Moses said with a smirk.

Gunnar's blood boiled at how they spoke about Galia. Where was the respect for women?

She was harmless and dainty. And lovely.

"Oooh, you mean Bosso wants her for himself? No competition, I ain't mad at the man. Galia is fine,"

"Yeah, but she's crazy as a bat. I saw her panicking like a spaz cause the computer wasn't working. And she threatened to tase me,"

"Eh, she just needs to be tamed. Takes a real man to tame a wild do-"

Gunnar walked in between the men and glared at the fool speaking.

He hoped he would keep going.

He dared him.

Violence wasn't the answer, but it could be an aid to finding it.

"G-gunnar, sir, I was just telling them to stop." Moses said frantically trying to save face.

Gunnar chuckled at his pathetic attempt to cover himself. "I ain't a hard man. I ain't mad for talking. But I told all you, and you talk about that sweet woman this way. It ain't acceptable. Don't bother clocking out, just leave now. Your last checks will be mailed."

He wanted to beat the devil and disrespect out of all of them. God Himself was keeping his anger at bay.

He hated that Galia couldn't feel safe working with them. That she had to threaten them. And wearing a pretty dress made ugly talk.

Their speculations about Gunnar and Galia, just unacceptable.

The men didn't say a word, but Moses tried.

"Leave now, or-just leave, Moses." Gunnar stopped his threat, his promise.

Moses pressed his lips together and left.

The one rule he set, the one rule that would end in immediate termination. They broke it without discretion.

Had they been messing with Galia all along and Moses lied about it? Did Galia lie for them?

A pit grew in Gunnar's stomach that made him want to bring those boys back in and teach them a lesson.

He was furious at them.

He smacked the wall to relieve his anger before he talked to Galia again.

He had to find out the truth.

But, he felt that he already knew.

"Lord, help me stay straight. I ain't going back to revenge," He prayed before walking into the office, where Galia was on a call.

"It's not a problem. I've got you here for tomorrow morning at eleven. Yes, thank you. You too," She ended the call and looked up at Gunnar.

"Hi," Selene said as he looked at her intensely.

What was going on now? Another proposal? She wasn't mentally prepared.

"Galia, I need you to be honest. Be real and I ain't gon be mad with you." His words scared her. "Did those men stop bothering you for real?"

Selene's heart dropped into her stomach.

No.

She felt sick. She hated being found out, put on blast.

They didn't stop. They didn't think twice.

The fearful look that took over Galia's face gave Gunnar the answer.

He had all the mind to beat them. Hem them up and beat them good.

She shouldn't have to look so afraid.

"You don't gotta say it. I'm sorry, dove." He sat down and sighed.

He was sorry?

She brushed it off every time. Her threats didn't work and they didn't want to leave her alone. And she knew they looked at her today, if Gunnar wasn't in, they would've tried something. But for once, she didn't want to be responsible.

She wanted to wear a dress and be lovely for once.

It happened everywhere and Gunnar didn't need to be bothered by something so trivial.

"I didn't notice. It didn't matter. Don't apologize, it's normal." She said and meant it.

And Gunnar wasn't shocked at how detached she was. He only hated that she had to be that way.

"Moses was supposed t-"

"Not to be rude, but it doesn't matter what rules you put in order. If someone wants to do something, no one can or will stop them. But it isn't even serious," Selene interrupted Gunnar and it gave him insight.

She wasn't suspicious of him for nothing. He didn't think it was nothing, but he didn't think that she'd experienced so much wrong, that right seemed bad.

His behavior towards her was foreign to her.

"Galia, if you ain't comfortable or even just a little nervous, it is something. They said so much disrespectful stuff, I fired them all. They knew better,"

Selene's defenses fell and she was unsure how to process this.

Why did Gunnar fire those men?

They were just doing whatever they wanted. It didn't hurt his business or his bank, so it shouldn't matter.

But it did.

"What is this about? Do you want me for yourself? What is wrong with you! I'm really not worth all of this trouble! So what do you want from me? You want sex? A girl to keep you company? You want to control me? Huh? What's so interesting about me, Gunnar! The bracelet and special treatment aren't commonly known for men with good intentions. So what do you want?"

Selene felt like she was going crazy.

He gave her a sweet answer earlier, but sugar rotted your teeth.  She hoped he would finally tell her the truth.

Gunnar stood from his seat and walked over to Galia.

She was crying. And she didn't notice.

That broke his heart.

Poor dove.

Now he had to speak clearly, properly, and ditch his lazy talk. No more simple answers, Galia needed to understand his motives, intentions, and why.

"About two months ago, I started praying to God for Him to fulfill the desires of my heart. The ones He gave me. And my desire was to have a wife to love, protect, and provide for. I prayed knowing that He would do it. Four weeks ago, when you answered that call, I knew then. And nothing mattered, not how long it'd take, whether you were going to have me or hate me, I knew that God's will would be done if I prayed and followed His lead. Thanksgiving, I saw you, but I didn't need to see you to know you were and are beautiful, and you are, Galia. Beautiful and uniquely created. So precious and sweet, people see that and some people take advantage of that. And I'm sorry that you've had to deal with that, know that whether you accept me or not, I will do everything in my power and prayer to keep you safe. I fired those men because your peace and security mean the world to me. But know that you can say anything and everything, but it won't change how I feel."

Selene's face was stuck. Her brain felt stuck. Again she was confused.

She liked his speech. She liked him. But was he being honest?

Is this a ploy to trick her into sleeping with him because his words made her feel secure for the first time in forever?

Whatever it was, is, she doesn't even know what she wants.

Gunnar is a nice man, but he doesn't want her. He wants Galia, the made-up version of Selene, that isn't much better than the real deal, but still.

He wouldn't look twice at the monstrosity called Selene.

So she looked into his eyes. Those eyes.

"You don't know who you're talking to, Gunnar. I can't let you say these things to me, not when you don't know who I am. I'm not this woman, please believe me."

I'm unstable, she wanted to add. I still don't love myself. And I'm shattered, nothing good or in working condition.

He needed someone real.

Gunnar nodded. He wasn't upset.

He knew it would take time. And whoever she turned out to be, he would love. He wouldn't nor couldn't give up.

"I understand, dove. I won't try nothing, I respect your word. But I will be here stayin for work now, just to make sure you're all right and take my position back,"

Why?

"What happened with Moses?" She had to know.

He was the ringleader.

Gunnar narrowed his eyes at the thought of him and her tone. "I fired him, he did something didn't he?"

She shrugged. "Yeah, he told me not to tell you. He said if I told it wouldn't matter because I'm just the receptionist. But it didn't matter, he didn't hurt me. He was just an idiot,"

This woman.

Gunnar took a few seconds to breathe. She said things so casually, but her eyes spoke volumes.

She was scared.

Gunnar was so close to beating Moses's lying tail.

This just lost his last paycheck.

"Galia, I know it don't matter to you, but it does matter. I'm sorry for everything and I'll be sure to keep you away from those things."

"You can't protect me from everything, Gunnar." Selene's bottled-up emotions were ready to burst. "And don't say that God will. I don't want to hear that line. You believe that he can, but he's shown me that he won't." Her heart was heavy.

She was carrying so much.

"Can I take my lunch break now?"

Gunnar nodded. The poor woman was a rug for careless people.

Selene took her purse, left the office, and hurried to her car.

It hurt so much.

She sat in her car and locked the doors before allowing herself to cry.

Talking about what was done didn't allow it to be forgotten. To be put aside as something she didn't care about.

Why did they do it? Why didn't they just leave her alone?

Remembering their actions made her put God back in the place she kept him.

An absent 'savior' who didn't care for her.

Why couldn't she just find a place to be without trouble following her?

Why couldn't she be normal enough to accept a good man?

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