Around midnight, my eyelids grew heavy, but I resisted the urge to go to sleep with a vengeance. I'd never shared a bed with a boy before, let alone one that I cared for as much as Zac, and every waking minute with him felt like a gift that I didn't want to give up.

Nestling my head into the crook of his neck, I tried to stay focused and alert by tracing the tats on his skin. I'd never admired Zac's ink in such an intimate way before. Tariq's uncle was a true artist. My fingers danced over the steampunk-inspired wings—with blades in place of feathers and gears instead of joints—that extended across his pecs in perfect symmetry. I memorized the collage of demonic-looking sugar skulls entwined with black vipers and geometric flowers that framed the wings. The intricate designs covered his entire chest and tapered down to the top of his abs.

"Have I ever told you how much I love your tats?" I slurred sleepily.

"No, but I always assumed you were only dating me because you thought I was hot."

"As long as you understand what's in it for me, baby."

He flicked my forehead. "Brat."

I gave him a lopsided grin. "I like you for your piercings, too. The ones on your ears. Your eyebrow. And especially the one on your tongue."

Zac tried to look annoyed, but I could tell he was quite pleased with what I said. "Would you ever get one?"

"What? A tattoo? Or tongue piercing?"

"A tattoo, I suppose."

I shook my head. They were too visible. I was worried about being judged once I entered the corporate world. "Probably not a tattoo, but I've always wanted a few more piercings. Not on my tongue, though."

Zac's eyes flickered with interest. "Really? Where, then?"

"Somewhere hidden. Somewhere no one but you would ever see," I answered with a secretive wink.

His eyebrows nearly rose to the ceiling. "No fucking way! Tell me. Where?"

"Take a guess."

Zac reached over to touch my boob. "Here?"

I smiled and nodded. Zac's mouth fell open in pure awe. He seemed speechless, and his adoring reaction was making me positively giddy. I couldn't resist baiting him some more. "I promise you'll be the first to find out if I decide to pull the trigger."

"Babygirl, that might be the nicest thing you've ever said to me!"

Zac launched himself over me and lightly pinned my wrists down on the mattress. He proceeded to shower ecstatic kisses all over my face and neck.

I giggled as I fended him off. "What are you talking about? Have you seen the way I treat other people? I've been nothing but nice to you!"

"Your idea of 'nice' is a bit twisted, then."

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Beggars can't be choosers."

"Lucky for you, I like twisted." He grinned and nipped my ear. "In fact, I was thinking..."

I eyed him suspiciously. "What's that?"

"If you ever got your nipples pierced, I doubt Little Zac would ever recover. Just thinking about it right now is making me so fucking hard."

Zac pushed himself against me as though to prove his point. Sure enough, as soon his cock probed against my belly, I didn't even have to look to know that my man was sporting a raging boner.

I laughed as I slid my hand around his impressive length, giving him a few teasing tugs before pulling away.

He caught my hand. "No, come back!"

I swatted at him. "You're the one who said 'not tonight,' buddy, not me!"

"Damn it, you're right. Why am I such a dumbass?"

We continued flirting like idiots for a while longer, giggling, teasing, whispering sweet nothings, and cracking dirty jokes as if we didn't have a care in the world... Exhaustion loomed over us, but neither Zac nor I were ready to give in. The happy minutes stretched into blissful hours. Over time, however, a sluggish quiet gradually settled between us, and our playful mood gave way to a pensive stillness.

As we laid in each other's arms, Zac laced his fingers through mine and murmured, "Hey, I've always wanted to ask..."

"Hmm?"

"What was your mom like?"

The seriousness in his tone caught me off guard. My default reaction to these types of questions had always been to sing Mamma's praises and talk about how much I missed her, but the rapt manner in which Zac awaited my reply made me think twice. I felt like I owed him a real answer. The thought gave me pause. As much as I loved Mamma, I was well aware that she wasn't perfect, yet, after she died, I chose to only hold onto my happy, pleasant memories about her and forget the rest.

After witnessing the photographs of her final moments at the charity ball,I found myself unable to ignore what a troubled woman she had been. With a strained expression, I tried to describe Mamma to Zac in a way that would honor her memory without glossing over her shortcomings. "She had a great sense of humor. And a huge heart. She loved life, but sometimes maybe she loved... a little too hard... and a little too much."

My heart began to clench. I didn't want to keep talking about Mamma. I didn't even want to think about her anymore. But I remembered what Zac had told me earlier.

You can't outrun your demons. You gotta face them and fucking own them. Or else they might convince you to destroy yourself.

I pushed myself to keep going. "Most of the time, I think other people found her to be too much to handle. She started seeing herself the way the world saw her. Mamma used to talk about how the fans who were once obsessed with her in her youth became the same assholes who wouldn't stop criticizing her weight or the number of men she dated or her lifestyle choices..."

My voice caught in my throat. Wetness stung my eyes. Again, I had to force myself to continue, "The sad part is... I'm almost certain that Mamma knew better than to let their voices drown out her own. She simply wasn't strong enough to ignore them."

Voice thick with emotion, Zac murmured, "Oh, baby..."

I closed my eyes for a second as memories assulated my senses. "When I was around nine or ten, I got into a nasty fight with a girl at school named Mirabelle. She made up a stupid rumor about me and spread to it to all of our friends. I went to Mamma and told her that I wanted to spread a rumor about Mirabelle, too, to teach that girl a lesson."

"What did your mom have to say?"

"Mamma warned me that there was always an angel and a demon inside us. The demon punished our enemies with lies, jealousy, and hatred while the angel filled them with truth, kindness, and love. As a kid, I asked her which one was stronger because I wanted to use the most powerful one to hurt Mirabelle. She told me, 'La persona che nutri vincerà sempre.' The one you nurture will always win. I only wish Mamma had listened to her own advice. She had so much to give to the world."

Zac leaned over to kiss away the tears on my face. In the gentlest voice ever, he breathed, "Oh, baby, baby, please don't cry. Your mom was an angel even if she couldn't outrun her demons. She might not be here anymore, but I can see how she's alive in you. In every way that matters. I see how hard you fight to be a good person day after day, even though you've been surrounded by assholes your whole life. Your mom made you stronger than she was. That was how much she fucking loved you."

I didn't know what to say, but Zac's words filled my heart with light and air and sweetness amidst my despair. I didn't know how it was possible for me to feel so happy and sad at the same time.

Zac lowered his face until our noses were almost touching. His gaze darkened with an intensity that made my heart beat faster. "I love you, babygirl. More than you'll ever know. You don't have to say it back. Or say anything at all. Just know that—I'm yours. From now on, I'm here to fight alongside you every step of the way."

In that very moment, he looked so utterly perfect. Golden eyes glimmering with emotion. Bare chested with his ink and piercings. Physically, Zac had always been a beautiful human being, but, right then, I knew that his heart—his beautiful fucking heart—was perhaps the most precious thing I had ever owned.

The words floated out of me easier than I could've ever imagined. "I love you, too, Zac."