chapter fifty three

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With my body snuggled in my comforters, I held on the sonogram picture of my unborn child. A little giggle escaped my lips. I always wanted to be a mom, not in this way, but I didn't care. I was granted the blessing of carrying a child. I could picture my future with my future daughter or son.

If I had a daughter I could picture her having my natural unruly curls. Though I messed my hair up severely by always applying heat on it, I wasn't going to let my daughter make that same mistake. I could see her complaining as I brushed her hair the night before the first day of school or picture day. I let out a chuckle. Every black girl knew that struggle.

I could picture her headstrong like me, picking on the boys who had cooties. She would be excited to go to school, always eager to learn. She would come home all flustered as she taught me her five times table or discuss how Christopher Columbus found America. Then on the weekends I would take her to all the places my mother didn't. We would explore every inch of Brooklyn and Manhattan. She was definitely going to be spoiled.

But if I had a son, I wouldn't know what to expect. He would probably drive me crazy. I would have to learn about all the superheroes and videos games. Or I would probably get stuck with a brainiac obsessed with plants and animals. I chuckled at the thought of that. Of course, I am stuck with a child who would rather play with little dinosaur figures than playing video games.

Once he hit puberty I wouldn't know how to handle myself. He better keep his little friend in his pants or I would slap him upside his head. Same for my daughter. I would raise them better than that. They would have high morals for themselves.

I ripped my blankets off my body as I felt myself need to pee. One thing about being pregnant is you always have the urge to pee. I pondered of where I would live. Surely this apartment was going to be too small for the both of us. I would probably ask Noel tomorrow to help me start looking for them tomorrow if we don't get hit with that big snow storm.

I sighed as I flushed the toilet and washed my hands. I was going to have to get a job. My part time job that I had at the writing center wasn't going to cut it. It was okay for my standards since I had a scholarship, but now I wasn't thinking of just myself anymore.

What did this all mean for school? Was I going to have to drop out? Well, I surely wouldn't be able to go to grad school right away as I hoped, but I would graduate with my psychology degree. Finding a decent paying job without your graduate degree in New York was terribly hard.

I wanted to call my mother and share this news with her, but I couldn't. I haven't talked to her since I graduated High School and she practically dumped me on my ass. I still remember what she said as I graduated from High School. She said, "your a grown woman now Reign. Act like one." Then she left with some guy I never saw that night and I haven't seen her since. I waited for her to come home telling myself that we would go out and celebrate soon enough. But she never did. Noel comforted me that night. She spent the night with me at my house and before long I knew my mother wasn't coming back so I moved out. At least I didn't have to pay for furniture.

My phone began vibrating and I picked it up at once. Tobias's name flashed through my scene and I hit decline. He had some nerve calling me. I was serious when I said I was done. I don't care how sick he is or whether he needed me to bail him out again. Enough is enough. There's only so much I could take from him. Yes I love him and yes I probably always will, but I can't stand to be treated like that anymore.

I can't stand not knowing if what he tells me is true. I can't stand not knowing if he's going to be okay. But most important I can't stand not knowing if he's going to be around. That's what I fear the most. I wanted this baby to have a father. I wanted them to have everything I never had. They never did anything to deserve this life they're about to be welcomed into, Tobias and I did.

I snuggled closer into my bed, my head perched up on many pillows. Outside I could faintly see a pillow of snow build up on my balcony. I guess the weather forecast was right for once. We were definitely having a huge snowstorm.

I don't know how long I was asleep, maybe minutes or hours, but a knock on the door jolted me awake. I didn't want to open it, but the persistent knocks told me I had no other choice. Groaning, I dragged my blankets with me as I walked towards the door.

I stepped on my toes as I looked through the peephole. I could see Tobias leaning against my door, his head right under the peephole and his hand clutched in a fist as he repeatedly hit the door.

"Reign, please," I heard him say. "I know you're there."

My heart began pounding as I stood back. I wasn't going to let him in. Under no circumstances was I going to allow him crawl under my skin again.

"Reign," he importuned, shakily this time. "I want to talk."

"There's nothing to talk about," I responded, keeping my voice low. "I'm done talking to you Tobias."

"I'm ready," was all he said. "I'm ready to tell you the truth. All of it."

Just like Tobias said, I'm ready to tell the truth, all of it. Are you guys ready? ;)

Really boring chapter, sorry, but I couldn't just jump to the ending. It's not realistic.

Few Questions Asked the Last Chapter:
•Is there going to be a sequel?
Yes, there's going to be a sequel :)

•Is the sequel going to have a time jump?
Yes! The next book will be 5 years down the line. A lot will happen between those 5 years, but I plan to not leave you guys wondering what will happen. I'm thinking of having one chapter about what's happening right now and then the next would be what you missed in the last 5 years. What do you guys think?

•Would you consider making this into a series or film?
For a series I guess it all depends on how I feel after the sequel. It's pretty unlikely, but you never know. As for the film yes! Gah, I would absolutely die. That's all I think about: getting published and then making a movie go along with it.

•Where are Reign's parents?
Well, her father was never in the picture. And her mom is God knows where. She hasn't talked to her since she graduated.

Also, if you didn't get the chance to ask any lingering questions you have, ask now!! And if you want the Q&A you should say yes now or forever hold your peace.

And if you haven't checked out my new story please do so!

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