It's been 2 weeks without him here and I've been trying my best to be happy for my crowds, but I can't stop thinking about him as I belt out every note. I can't sleep all the way through the night without feeling that same haunting nightmare come on. After he left that morning, he texted me when he had arrived back home, so I've just been texting him everyday, but it's not the same. I want him here, to feel his touch. I miss him more and more.

I'm in Ireland doing the last leg of my tour out of the USA and I'd do anything for him to be here, see it, and experience it all with me.

"Blu...Ricky is acting weird with me." Pepper whined and I sighed coming out of my state of thinking. She and Rickey are trying things out, but it's a long distance issue and Pepper freaks out if he doesn't send a cute emoji or if he only texts one word.

"I'm sure it's nothing. He gets that way sometimes." I said waving it off. "No it's not. He just told me this isn't working for him anymore." She replied sadly and I jumped up to hug her.

She sighed in my embrace as I rubbed her back.

"I'll call him and see what's up." I said to her and she let a tear fall as she walked out my dressing room.

I never knew Rickey to be like that and I saw the way they were before he left. I never know though maybe it's for the better.

I sipped my water 10 minutes before the show as I went over my runs and positions in my head. I flopped my arms going over my dance movements.

"Blu.....there's someone here for you." Pepper said and I immediately thought the worse like my father until I saw his handsome face come off from around the door.

"Baby!" I yelled, jumping in his arms forgetting every argument we'd had previously and just enjoyed being in his strong arms again.

"Hey Blu." He mumbled as he sighed in my embrace. My wig was probably everywhere. I pulled away and wiped my eye from a small tear. He laughed with me and I hugged him again.

"Damn, don't leave, okay? I go on in about 5 minutes." I said and he pulled me back, close to his chest. "I'm not going anywhere." He spoke and I went out and had the best show I've had since he left.

He was there waiting for me when I ran off like before. He kissed my forehead praising my performance. "Let's go for coffee." I said and he smiled as he watched them change me from Katie to Blu. We were out like lightning fighting for a chance to be alone. The limo was the perfect escape.

"Coffee!" I yelled to Luca, my driver and closed the small window. I straddled Matthew and kissed down to his neck. He groaned letting me know he was just as into it.

"Blu...." He mumbled in a haze and pulled back. "What?" I asked and he turned me to where I was sitting on him, facing forward.

"Don't you think we should talk before?" He asked as I leaned back to where our faces were side by side.

"No, talking gets us in trouble and complicates things." I said and he smiled kissing my cheek. "I know, but we need to be on the same page." He said back and I felt his maturity in those words. It made me nervous. Those two weeks he was gone, maybe he realized I'm not what he needs.

He ordered for the both of us and we took our seats. We just stared at each other for a good 3 minutes admiring everything that had seemed to change.

"Blu, when I left I didn't want to. I just felt like it was right and I've had a good two weeks away and I've learned something." He started. I sighed nervously.

"Go ahead, say it. You don't need me anymore." I said and he looked puzzled.

"What no? I learned I can't live without you, Blu. The last two weeks were good for me. It showed me I need to stop taking you for granted and love you like you deserve, you know? I need to do right by you at all times no matter the circumstances. I love you, Blu. I'd be considered crazy if I didn't." He replied and my grin grew so wide.

"Matthew Summers, you scared me. You seemed so different. I just knew you'd say you didn't want me. I love you and hearing those words from you made me even more sure about the fact I want you for the rest of my life."

"Never ever think I won't love you or need you. No matter what happens you are and will forever be my only love." He said making me melt at his touch. At that moment our coffees arrived.

"Secret for Secret?" I said and he smirked. "This coffee place has been rocking my world almost better than our place back home." I said and he laughed.

"You tell anyone this and I'll never forgive you, but would you like to dance?" He asked and I looked around.

"You're talking to me? The Matthew who always says he can't dance whatsoever is asking me to dance." I said and started laughing while taking his hand in mine and he pulled me close to him out on the makeshift dance floor and we fell in with all the other couples dancing together.

He looked in my eyes for a second and I saw a spark jump in his right eye and he mouthed 'I love you' and I fell into his chest dancing the rest of the night all the way home.

*****

"What are you playing?" He asked as I laid on his chest playing the addicting game Crossy Road.

"Ugh...you messed me up!" I said as my unicorn got hit by a car. A text popped up in my notifications from Pepper.

She wanted to know if I'd talked to my brother which I hadn't. I'd been with Matthew and forgot about everything else the past few days. We'd been living like Boo Radley for a good while.

I dialed his number as Matthew twirled my hair on his finger. I put my finger up to my mouth letting him know I was on the phone.

"Rickey!" I yelled in the phone and he responded just as happy. He asked about Matthew causing me to put it on speakerphone.

"Rickey, what's up?" Matthew said and they chatted. "Hey, I called....can we talk about my issue?" I asked and they both laughed.

"Proceed." He said. "Soooooo.....what's up with my girl Pepper?" I said as chill as possible.

"Sky-Blu.....I don't know. Is she upset?" He asked me and Matthew laughed quietly.

"Of course. She really liked you. You texted her to tell her it was over, first off. That's not like you at all." I added and he sighed over the line.

"Matthew, what would you have done?" He asked him and I watched Matthew's face change.

"Well, I don't know, Rickey. Why'd you exactly not want to be with her?" He asked my brother.

"The distance and I don't know. We clicked, but I wasn't feeling it that day and I felt it best to just stop it then." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"No, Rickey. You should've called her and explained. She's heartbroken over you. I guess I am too. Y'all seemed great together." I said and he groaned.

"Now you're mad too? Women." He groaned and Matthew laughed.

"Shut up! You're the one who was so insensitive that you texted her instead of being a slight gentleman and calling." I said and Matthew patted his hand down telling me to chill.

"Okay, Sky. I didn't exactly tell her the right way, but it wasn't working and I didn't purposely want to hurt her." He said back and Matthew jumped in.

"I feel like what Rickey is saying by that is they weren't clicking anymore and I believe that Pepper was there for him while he grieved. They got to know each other and it was great, but the distance and only texting a person everyday takes a toll on any relationship no matter how much you want it to work." He said and I almost clapped.

"Exactly dude." Rickey shot back and we all laughed. "Okay. I understand, but you need to call her and apologize for that text." I commented and we said our goodbyes, he hung up.

"They'll make up." Matthew said as I went back to playing my game. "Oh....so now you're a love expert." I questioned laughing.

"No. I'm just saying like you and everyone else who saw them together. They truly like each other. They just need time to hang out and have the conversations real couples do not about your mother, so Rickey isn't infatuated with the way Pepper comforts him and just actually is infatuated with who she is completely." He said and I smiled up at him.

"Look at you. Preaching and stuff. You really are growing up." I said and he laughed taking his hands and trailing them down to my chest, grabbing my boobs.

"Nope, I'm just wise." He replied as I squelched at his hand on it. "You're crazy." I said laughing at him.

"I'm going to shower since you want to play games on your phone and ignore me." He said lifting me up and standing.

"We can play a game or two in the shower then." I said with a wink causing him to die in laughter. I just looked at him pouting. He pulled me by my legs to where I was sitting in front of him and he was leaned against the bed.

"You don't have to try to be sexy. You already are." He whispered in my ear and pulled back to mock my wink.

"Come on." I said grabbing his arm dragging him. "I like the enthusiasm." He spoke smacking my ass with a smirk.

I started the shower and turned to see him leaning against the bathroom counter. I came close to him and slowly lifted his shirt up his abs and slid it off of him.

I moved lower and slid down his shorts. He pulled me close kissing me fiercely.

"God, I fucking missed you." Matthew groaned in my ear.
*******
The radio was blasting in the hotel room and I was dancing and singing along. I ate my fruit waiting on Matthew to change his clothes. We decided we'd leave our humble abode to at least eat tonight.

"Ah!" I yelled as I felt a pair of hands wrap around my waist. "Those moves were pretty sexy. Are you trying to tempt me?" He asked and I smiled.

"Maybe, maybe not." I said making my eyes go in my head. "You wereeeeee!" He said making fun of me.

"Oh shut up!" I yelled covering my face as I cut off the music. "It's alright, baby. If I wasn't hungry for real food. I'd eat you." He said smirking at me.

"Matthew Ayden!" I scolded blushing as if I wasn't used to his dirty mouth and mind. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders guiding me out the room through the doors of the hotel to the car.

Dinner was just like it had been when we were shacked up in the room. We acted as if no one was there and he treated me just as he would if we were alone and I loved every second of it. The way he claimed me as his girlfriend in public made me know he was serious when we talked at the coffee shop. He wanted me and he'd prove it.

"Fro-yo?" He asked as we walked out the restaurant laughing our insides out. I couldn't catch my breath quick enough. "We're in Ireland, do they even have fro-yo?" I asked with happy tears in my eyes.

"Yes, actually they do." He said and I grabbed his hand. He smirked up and turned to look at me.

"Why are you crying?" He exclaimed and made me stop walking. I laughed through my tears. "These are happy tears, baby. I missed you so much and I'm just happy you're here now." I said to him and we started walking again stopping at Yogism.

"Blu, don't cry even though it's happy. I don't want you crying." He said and I grabbed his arm squeezing it tight. "Yes, sir." I said back making him smile at me and he took his hand to dry my eyes.

*****

Notes-

like I've said a million times...i love them so much...life goals

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-L xo