Chapter 1.

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Life does some twisted fucking shit sometimes.            

When I first arrived in Kettle's Bell, Kansas, I thought it would just be another dot on the map that I chose to lie low in for a while until my tormentor caught up to me again and I had to make a run for it. It was supposed to be just like all of the other little towns I'd hopped from. Boring, lonely, and temporary.

But as fate would have it, Kettle's Bell was hiding some massively big secrets in the shadows cast by that full moon.

Secrets that would take my life and toss me into a whole new one. A life nothing like the running and hiding I was used to.

The Alyssa Barnes of the past was put to rest once and for all and the new, badass Werewolf Alyssa was born.

It's still weird to think about. I was always far from normal, but I'd lived my whole twenty-one years without knowing the biggest secret about myself until I quite literally stumbled right into this little homely town that just so happened to house a pack of its very own.

And in my efforts to protect myself by keeping everyone at arm's length, I'd let my instinct to fight draw the attention of that pack's extremely moody and even more sexy alpha.

Daimon Kross was everything I knew to stay away from.

And everything I wanted.

I'd fought him and myself for months, but in the end, he'd helped awaken me to the person I want to be and with his help and the help of his pack, I'd been able to finally send my demon straight to hell where he belongs.

Everything from there on out should have been easy.

I should have finally gotten a life worth living, with the man I'd fallen hard for.

It was supposed to be me and Daimon against the world.

We were supposed to get to be happy.

Don't I deserve that shit by now?

Daimon deserves it too.

His life hasn't been easy either, and like me his heart and mind were also haunted by ghosts, but the most important ghost of all...the one he vowed to love and protect...the one he'd loved from the moment he laid eyes on her...the one he'd asked to marry him....the one true love of his life that was supposed to be dead...wasn't so dead anymore.

Instead she was back from the grave and crying in the arms of the man I love. The arms that are supposed to be holding me.

Life has one fucked up sense of humor.

I stand frozen in the rain as Daimon disappears into the renovated hotel turned Werewolf living quarters of the Krossway with his weeping angel in his arms.

I'm not sure how long passes, maybe only a few moments before I hear the bikes all flying into the parking lot, Toby laying his over right in front of the entrance where the taxi that delivered this final strike to my heart had been parked before he runs inside.

"Alyssa?" I hear Easton walking towards me but I can't turn to face him. "Is it true?"

He comes around me, putting a hand on my shoulder and I sway under the weight. I can't respond, the lump in my throat too much to speak around but I nod once and Easton frowns, the rain turning his blonde hair a brownish color.

"It's going to be ok," he says before stepping in to hug me.

"How?" I whisper. "You know how he felt...feels about her."

"I also know that she's been gone for five years and that it was before you," he tells me. "Don't go jumping to conclusions yet when you don't know the full story yet."

"What's there to know, Easton?" I shake my head, stepping out of his embrace. "She was the only person he cared about and it nearly destroyed him when he lost her. He wanted to marry her. They were engaged."

"All of those things you just said were in past tense," he points out. "She's been gone a long time and neither of us knows what's going on if we are both out here trying to get the flu in this rain."

Logically I want to believe that he could be right.

A big part of me wants to think that what Daimon and I have can transcend what he had years ago with her, but then at the same time I remember that I never would have had anything with Daimon in the first place if it weren't for the fact that he thought Stacey was dead.

She's been his since he was a child lost and alone in the woods and she rescued him in more ways than one.

I've even only been here a few months.

History is a hardass thing to beat.

"I don't know if I can go in there." I shake my head, just the thought of it making me feel sick to my stomach as my brain tortures me by replaying her lips on his over and over in my brain.

"If it gets to be too much, you and I will go out for a run, deal?"

My wolf stirs within me, begging me to agree while my heart pounds with fear of taking the first step.

More men arrive, rushing into the Krossway and I stand back trying to muster up my strength.

I helped kill Dr. Ellison Cochran, my ex-psychiatrist turned abuser.

I killed the number one pack beta with one hand.

I survived being shot right in the chest.

I can do this.

I let Easton take the first step, his head turned to make sure I'm following him and then we walk with painful steps to the door and into the lobby.

All the guys are huddled up around a table in the giant rec room and I stay back to the side as Easton moves in closer to where Toby is holding the small frail Stacey in his arms now, tears running down both of their faces while Daimon stands right beside her, staring down with that same look of shock he'd had the moment she showed up.

"I don't understand," Toby says, cradling her head to him. "We all thought you were dead."

"I k-know," she whispers, her voice scratchy and high.

"I'll get you some water." Aaron rushes across the room and into the kitchen while Tom grabs some paper towels from another table and hands them to her to dry her face.

As Paul steps aside I can see her better.

She's shockingly small, her bones are sticking out and her skin is pale and dirty, with jet black hair tangled in knots down past her shoulder, but even still she's noticeably beautiful.

Aaron rushes back to her with a glass of water and she drinks it greedily as her eyes skim back up to Daimon.

"I didn't think I'd ever make it back here," she says softly. "The night they took me...when Trevor and Rococo died..." She looks down. "I thought that was the end for me. They c-cut my h-hand," she says and my eyes move to her left hand on the table and I contain my gasp at the missing finger there. Daimon had told me that they'd gifted him the finger with her engagement ring on it. It makes my stomach ache. "Luca and the other men took me to Pablo and he...." She claps her mouth shut and I recognize that look in her eyes and the look of rage in Daimon's. "A-after he told Luca to finish me off, but he didn't. He took me to this place and he kept me there." She shivers visibly and Daimon's jaw grinds as his hands clench and unclench at his sides. "He used to come often, but then he's just been gone. I kept waiting for him to come back, but as weeks went by I took the risk of trying to escape. I broke my hand to get out of the shackles and I broke out. I was in a basement under this shed out in the middle of nowhere. I walked forever before I found a town and someone to help me."

"Did you ever see anyone else while you were there?" Aaron asks and she shakes her head as the tears run down her dirty face.

"It's likely Luca never even told anyone because he was disobeying Pablo by not killing her," Toby says, petting her hair down her back.

Five years.

Five years she was held captive and only ever saw her captor. I can't even fathom it. I'd spent months in Ellison's personal hell for me and I'd barely survived it. She was there for five fucking years.

"As soon as I was able I came straight here." She glances between Daimon and Toby and the other guys take turns stealing looks at me. Probably feeling sorry for the poor little outcasted Shewolf who just got fucked over by life yet again.

You'd think I'd be used to it by now.

Toby pulls her back in and looks up at Daimon as he shushes her cries. "It's all going to be ok now, Stace, you're back and Luca is dead and we aren't going to let anything else happen to you."

"Luca is dead?" she gasps.

"Yes," Toby tells her, his head turning to me like he just remembered that I exist when he thought of Luca. He almost looks a little guilty and maybe even more sad as he slides his gaze back down to his lost sister who is back home at last. "He's dead and can never hurt you again."

Only in her mind.

Her body shakes and I'm sure she's just had the same thought.

Daimon turns his head slowly to look at me, his lips slightly parted and his deep-set amber eyes search mine from across the room. He's lost. A look I never dreamt I'd see on his face, always so sure and demanding. It's out of place and the meaning behind it practically rips the hole in my chest open all over again.

In fact, the thought of losing Daimon now, after everything we've been through, hurts even worse than the bullet ever did.

"I was so scared." Stacey's bottom lip quivers and Daimon drags his eyes away slowly, stooping down beside her.

"There isn't anything to be afraid of anymore," he tells her as she continues to shake.

"They'll come for me, Daimon," she says. "As soon as they find out I'm alive they'll come and they'll finish the job."

"No," he says softly to her. "They won't, because no one is going to find out about you. You're back and we are all going to do whatever it takes to keep you safe."

"I can't ask you all to do that for me again," she tells him.

"You don't have to ask," Toby says and everyone echoes in their agreements.

"We aren't letting anyone get to you again," Tom tells her and she tries to smile through her tears.

"I can't believe I'm here."

You and me both.

"Come on, you should get some rest." Daimon helps her from her chair. "Easton, come with us. You need to check her over."

"No, Daimon, please." She touches his chest. "I don't want to be poked and prodded anymore."

"Shh, beautiful," he whispers, helping her walk. "We need to make sure you're alright."

Easton looks back at me, apologizing with his eyes as he follows them up the stairs. 

"I was so scared I'd never see you again," she's saying to Daimon as they get upstairs and he walks her into our-his-their room. "But it was thinking of you that got me through the hardest days."

"I failed you, Stace," he tells her. "I was supposed to protect you and you've been out there..."

"If it hadn't been for you, I would have been dead, Daimon," she replies softly. "Luca had me, but my heart was with you and that's what kept me going each day."

I can't do it anymore.

I try to block out what they're saying, but it's so hard. I stumble backwards as I concentrate so hard on not listening.

Werewolf super hearing sucks major monkey balls when your boyfriend's dead fiancé comes back from the dead.

I rush through the lobby, struggling to keep it all together as I break for the doors.

"I'll come with you." Ash is right behind me.

"No," I mutter, the tears filling my eyes.

"I'm coming whether you like it or not," he tells me and I just nod as I move quickly to the back of the building.

"No, Alyssa," Daimon's voice whispers but he's still with her. I ignore him, reaching the tree line and stripping out of my clothes as fast as I can. "Don't go," he says again, but he's not here. He's with her. And I can't be here anymore.

"Let's go, Ash," I say, my shift coming on faster than I've ever shifted before, the need and utter uncontrolled emotion in me forcing her right out of me and into a fast stride before Ash is even finished undressing.

At first I have the intention of letting him run with me, but then as my paws fly over the wet earth, I can't slow myself down.

My wolf widens her strides, practically skimming over the ground; she's moving so fast and I don't stop until we are so far away that the only thing that can reach me now is my breaking heart.

I don't know what this means for us, but I know it can't be good.

I'm also not sure I can face knowing at all.

"Run," I whisper to my wolf. "Get us out of here."


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