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Chapter 50

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"Hey Cas, it's Sebastian," he said over the phone. He paced his empty room. "I'm calling to check on you. Um...I meant it when I said I'm here for you if you want to talk to someone. I know we had some problems. Some is an understatement, a lot of problems, but we were friends before we dated. And I don't mind being a friend. You seem to be really going through it, and I just...I just want to say I'm here for you."

Sebastian hadn't seen Cassandra since prom. It had been days since the fateful day of her crying in his arms. She felt cold against his skin, and her tears soaked the t-shirt he wore. He still remembered the feeling of her in his arms. She became undone for him, showing him her rawest self. A self she hadn't shown anyone else—not even Michelle. 

Her crying face haunted him ever since. He couldn't get it out of his head no matter what he was doing or who he was with.

Sebastian paced the room. "She's not okay. She's probably crying," he muttered to himself. "She's probably alone. Alone," he repeated before he stopped pacing his room. Sebastian grabbed his keys and did the one thing he swore he would never do again. He drove to Cassandra's house. 

It was midday, the perfect time for him to come over. Michelle would be at the hospital and Walter at his police patrols. He parked in front of her house. Her car stood right in front. It looked as if it hadn't moved in days.

Hee approached the house and knocked on the door. He was surprised to see Aurora, with her dual-colored hair answering the door. She took a step back when she saw the tall specimen that was Sebastian Livingston at her front door again. 

"Sebastian?" She questioned. "What are you doing here? Wait...I know why you're here. It's Cassandra, right?"

"Yeah, it is. But, it's not what you think. I'm just here to check on her. I heard about her grandpa, and I know they were close. And I just...I came to see if she's okay."

Aurora rubbed her arm. "Yeah, I can't say that she is, in fact, okay. His death is it's kind of hitting her hard. She doesn't leave her room unless she is using the bathroom and occasionally eats food. She lost a bit of weight." He swallowed the spit in his mouth. His leg began to bounce as he began to look over Aurora's shoulder, hoping she'll let him in. "If you think you can help her," she moved to the side and allowed him to get past her. "Then go for it. Cassandra and I are going through a rough patch, but I don't want her to suffer."

"Thank you, Aurora," he said before coming inside. He knew where Cassandra's room sat. He'd walked through and snuck through the house many times to get into Cassandra's room. He would never forget when he stayed the night and had to leave before Michelle's five am shift. He felt like an assassin that wandered through the halls looking for their next prey.

Sebastian didn't bother to knock on the door. He knew she was in there, probably staring at her wall or under her covers, hoping the world would swallow her up with no remorse. He opened the door. The usually organized room that smelled of delicious scents was a mess. Dishes, food, clothing, and boxes labeled differently riddled the room.

He took a seat on her bed. "Cas," he merely said. She laid under the covers and didn't come out. "I told you I was here for you. I won't leave your side," Sebastian said. He stayed by her side in silence, holding her hand until it was time for Michelle to come home.

Sebastian made it his mission to see her every day. No words were exchanged by the two, just holding the hand, a few sniffles, and silence between them.

After three days, Sebastian cleaned her room. On the fifth day, he began to bring her food. Her favorites were embedded in his mind. She said nothing of the cleaning and the food that sat there uneaten until it was time for him to leave. On the seventh day, Sebastian looked at the silhouette of Cassandra in bed and sighed.

"Cas...you're leaving this room," he announced. He pulled the covers from her body. She wore the same outfit from the day and prom. The light of the room burned her eyes as she looked up at Sebastian. After all the days he came to her room, she'd never fully seen his face. As far as she was concerned, he was just a hand that she sought solace from and a voice. A deep voice told her he cared about her and would be there for her through it all.

She looked up at him and simply said, "no."No, it was the first and only thing she said since the week of him being there every day. He held back his smile at the small bit of progress. She was speaking to him. She acknowledged him as someone—a person who was there. Cassandra pulled the covers back over her body and closed her eyes. Sebastian pulled the covers off of her again.

"What is your deal?" She seethed. "Let me lay in my bed in peace."

"No," Sebastian picked Cassandra up from the bed, much to her dismay.

"Sebastian, what are you doing?" She yelped.

She was much lighter in his arms. The days laying in bed made Cassandra skinnier. He walked down the steps while carrying her, never faltering. Before long, he placed her in his car, and the two drove. Sebastian had no set location other than away from Cassandra's house.

"You know this is kidnapping. I could have you arrested," she said. She began to roll down the window. The air hit her skin. She refused to admit it, but it felt nice—the fresh air.

"You could."

There were no more words exchanged between the two as he drove with the windows down. Cassandra's usual free-flowing hair was in a ponytail that still managed to become one with the wind. The two listened to music, not exchanging a single glance to one another. The one time Sebastian stopped was to get a pizza. He placed it on Cassandra's lap and merely said eat, to which she reluctantly did.

He listened to the sounds of her eat, slice by slice, making him feel slightly better. Hours went by before Sebastian stopped driving. "Where are we?"

"I have no idea," he admitted before he rushed to open Cassandra's door. The two teens looked out to where Sebastian stopped. It was a hill, a tall grassy hill without a single soul in sight. "Come on," Sebastian ushered. "Let's climb to the top and see what we find."

Sebastian began to walk. His hand stayed in his pocket with Cassandra behind him. The track up the hill didn't affect Sebastian, but unsurprisingly, it took all of Cassandra's might to climb it. She felt her legs ache when she made it to the top, and her breathing was hoarse. She took a seat on the ground when she made it to the top. She pulled her legs to her chest and looked ahead at the fields of nothing. She expected the ocean or some lush forest, but instead, she saw nothing but more grassland. Not even a flower could be seen, just green and more green as she looked ahead.

Sebastian took his respected seat next to her and looked ahead. Silence, not a single word was said as the teens looked at green grass from the tall hill.

"Why have you been doing all of this for me, Sebastian," Cassandra asked, ending the silence. "The coming over my house, giving me company, buying me food. Taking me here," she added. "Why? After everything?"

"I don't really know Cas." He looked upon the field of nothing. "I just know that I don't like it when I see that you're sad or upset. When I found you in that diner. I—I just wanted to protect you and make you feel better."

"Well...it's going to be a while before I feel better," she mumbled. A small breeze went by the two teens. 

"Then, it's going to be a while before you get rid of me."

"You know, a lot of guys after a girl breaks up with them. They never talk to her again. They act like the girl is some distant memory."

"Cas, I know that. I just...we were friends before we were girlfriend and boyfriend. Yes, the majority of the time, I was pinning over you, but we were friends. I want to be a friend to you."

"Friends," she repeated. 

"Yes, a friend," he reached out and grabbed her hand. It was warm to touch. "A friend that is going to be here during this tough time. A friend that might annoy you but will make you smile regardless. A friend that knows you, the real you—flaws and all."

Cassandra was speechless when she looked up at Sebastian from under her hood. She met his eyes, and she knew for her a fact he wasn't lying. He would be there for her and stay. 

"So, Cas. Talk to me, unload everything onto me. I'm here. I'm listening."

Cassandra's eyes became glossy with the words Sebastian spoke. "You know I didn't really cry when my dad died," Cassandra started. "I thought, wow, daddy is dead, so maybe mom won't be as sad anymore. It didn't really do much. But, now that a man who was so sweet and so kind. My grandfather, the closest thing I ever had to a dad, is dead. I just...I just," she began to cry. "I just can't. I can't deal with it, Sebastian. Like death is so permanent. I won't ever see him again."

Sebastian pulled her into a hug. "I know, just let it all out."

"Then, there's my grandmother. The first day she was a wreck, but now it's like she's continuing her life already. I mean Sebastian, he just died. Cry, be sad, break things. It's like I was the only one who cared about him."

I began to rub her back in his embrace. "I'm sure that's not true. People deal with things in different ways. Maybe doing her daily things is her way of coping. After the death of a loved one, I know some people pick up new hobbies, travel, take up a new look."

"How do you know that?"

"Googled it. You know when you sit on a bed and hold someone's hand for hours, there's just so much you can do." 

Cassandra snuggled more into Sebastian's chest. "You've changed since I last saw you. The Sebastian I know wouldn't do something like this."

"Well, a year is a long time, Cas. People change... as you should," he added. Cassandra looked up at Sebastian from the inside of his embrace. 

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

He cleared his throat. "Cas, you smell. Like really bad." Cas immediately pulled back and smelled herself. Her usual sweet scent was gone, and she smelled like a trucker after a long twelve-hour shift. 

"Why...why didn't you say anything," she blundered. She got up from the ground and began to walk to the car. 

"Well...how could I?" Sebastian laughed, following her to the car down the hill. 

"You say, Cas, you stink."

"Well, that's easier said than done. You were in bed and wouldn't leave. Knowing you, you would have thrown something at me if I told you you smelled like hell on earth." 

"Please take me home so I can shower," Cassandra requested as she got into the car. 

Sebastian let out a low chuckle at her words. It sounded like her, the old Cas, he thought. He got into his car and began to drive the two hours back to Cassandra's house. He took note of the fact she sat far away from him, far enough that he had no chance of smelling her. 

He arrived at her house. It was now dark. The street lights lit up the neighborhood. Cassandra unbuckled her seatbelt and looked over to Sebastian. "Thank you, thank you for being there for me during this. I appreciate it, Sebastian. l really do more than you could ever know."

"No problem."

"You know, you can stop coming here every day. I'm fine with a text or something."

"I know, but I want to be there for you, Cas. Physically," he added. "Physically as in being by your side, not...shit. What I'm saying is that a text message is not enough. I'm gonna stop by and check in on you."

Cassandra looked down at the street and back up to Sebastian. "Okay," she smiled. Sebastian watched as Cassandra walked into her house and drove off when she was safe inside. 

His phone rang, and a picture of Mia popped up. Sebastian's stomach clenched when he saw the short-haired girl smiling on his phone. 

"Hello," he answered slowly. 

"Oh, so you aren't dead? Where have you been all day? Why haven't you answered any of my texts?"  

He cursed under his breath and went to his messages. Mia texted him ten times throughout the day, and he hadn't responded a single time. His eyebrow raised when he saw the text of him coming over for some alone time for the two. 

"Sorry, I was doing something for my mom today. I didn't have a chance to look at my phone," he lied. It had been a secret to Mia his ongoing trips to Cassandra's house. It was a recipe for disaster. His girlfriend of one year finding out about his ex-girlfriend's daily visit would warrant a breakup he didn't want. 

He loved Mia, but he wanted to make sure Cassandra was okay. 

"What?"

"Huh?"

"What did you have to do for your mom?"

Sebastian cleared his throat. "There was something she wanted me to pick up. She got it delivered to the wrong store, and she asked me to pick it up. Plus, I woke up late too, so you know how it is. All of that makes a person go M.I.A." 

"Oh...well, that sucks." She stopped talking. "Hey, so I'm gonna be honest with you. I feel like I haven't heard from you much since you know prom. It's sorta, you know, weird because we had sex and all, and it's like your a bit distant."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to feel like that."

"Yeah, I thought like after we had sex, we would be closer and...I don't know; I sound stupid. I'm sorry."

"No, no, you don't. It's just been a lot on my plate lately with the Youtube channel starting up and school ending. You know what, tomorrow night, let's go on a date."

"Really," she squealed over the phone. "I mean, really?" She said after recomposing herself.

Sebastian let out a low laugh. "Yeah, we can go see a movie, get some food. Maybe you'll let me touch a boob or two." 

"Sure, about all of that. I'm not sore anymore, and there's a new movie that I haven't seen yet."

"Sore?"

"Shut up. You know what I mean, Sebastian. I don't need to spell it out for you. I didn't realize until I stood up how it was down there and...and please, I don't want to explain anymore." He could tell over the phone her face was red. She was always easily embarrassed about things. 

"Are you blushing, Mia? Do you want me to come over so I can kiss that red face of yours?"

"Sebastian, I'm hanging up," she announced. 

"Why? I thought you missed me," he teased. 

Sebastian went on to tease Mia killing the tension from earlier. 

~

Cassandra emerged out of the shower and was met with a wild Aurora. "Hey," Cassandra said.

"I'm just going to come out and ask. Are you and Sebastian like...I don't know back together? Or like doing that weird thing you guys always do that ends with you two in your room screwing?"

"What? No. Sebastian and I...we're just friends. He's just a friend to me right now.  I'm going through a lot right now, Aurora."

"Good, because I don't know if you know this, but he has a girlfriend, Cassandra." Cassandra held back from her jaw-dropping. "And not just a little fling, like Malia, or Vicky or Danielle, and God knows who else. She's his girlfriend, a real one of one year that actually pretty nice, I hear. And with your track record—"

"We're done," she cut her off. "Sebastian and I are done. I'm not going to be some homewrecker that breaks him and his girlfriend up. Been there and done that, Aurora. Okay? Okay."

"Okay, well. Just telling you." Cassandra readjusted the towel on her body. Aurora fiddled with her fingers. "So, um, other than Sebastian. How are you? I know your grandpa died, and you two really got along."

"Sad," she admitted. "I'm really fucking sad."

"I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do?" 

Aurora's words resonated with Cassandra. After a year of silence between the two girls. Aurora wanted Cassandra to know she was there. She was like a sister to her again. 

"Just...just keep letting Sebastian in for me and keep it a secret. I know we're just friends, but some people will blow it out of proportion for us two meetings. And like you said, he has a girlfriend, and I don't want to ruin that for him." 

"Sure, Sebastian will be our little secret," Aurora nodded. Cassandra walked past her and went into her room. She had no idea Sebastian had a girlfriend, but she could never let Aurora know. She placed one leg over the other as she looked to Sebastian's Instagram page. There only sat three pictures. She cursed his lack of social media interest. 

Cassandra bit her lip and called Bree. 

"Hello," Bree answered. 

"I'm going to ask you a question. I don't want you to ask why I'm asking you this, and I especially don't want you to think this means anything. When in fact is does not whatsoever."

"Cassandra, I have finals next week. What is your question?"

She bit her lip. "Who is Sebastian's girlfriend?"

"Cas..." She let out a deep sigh. She knew this question would eventually be asked her when she moved back. Sebastian's girlfriend was a secret Bree wanted to keep hidden from her friend. She knew the effects of Sebastian and how much it skewed her judgment. 

 "Her name is Mia. I'll send you her Instagram. Have fun and don't make bad decisions," she added before hanging up the phone. In an instant, Cassandra received the link. She clicked the profile of the girl. She scrolled through books and movies until she landed on a picture of her. 

"She's pretty," she admitted. "I didn't think that was his type." Mia was different from Cassandra. While Cassandra had long hair, Mia's was short. Cassandra had big boobs. She barely had anything on her chest. Cassandra never read, but it seemed like Mia lived in the library. 

She was completely different from Cassandra. 

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