25. Bastille

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I stared at a tear streaked face Nathan, Dylan giving me dirty looks and practically everyone pissed at me. But too scared to say anything, they just glare.

This has to be a nightmare...I wish it was a nightmare. I don't...I do deserve this. But not to this extent.

It was way worse yesterday...I don't think I ever cried as much as I did yesterday...

****yesterday****

I look at my mom, seeing her red faced and my dad shouting cuss words at me. An ice pack on my lip and cheek as Arthur punched the shut out of my face. Not to mention I woke up with these two giving me death glares.

I'm not surprised that Arthur isn't in here, he heard me say something I didn't mean. Because of that I was fucking punched the shit out of my face!

My parents aren't asking me if I'm okay or anything, just yelling and annoying the shit out of me. My ears are on fire and I just want to see Arthur and explain.

Considering we ended things on a spur note then he hears me say those lies... It looks so bad...

"Where's Arthur?" I asked, the room going quiet as my mom started wiping her eyes." I'm going to apologize. He heard a misunderstanding, I was trying to protect the both of us."

My dad stands, shaking his head as he just began to walk out of my room.

"Arthur is no longer here, he asked us yesterday if we could get him on a quick-trip jet back to France. He's no longer here William, he's gone, because of you and your actions..." He sneered, making me freeze and stop exactly what I was doing. Stopped blinking, stopped moving, stopped breathing...

I didn't understand.

He knows me. He knows how I am. Yet he just...left and didn't think to tell me or try to talk...?

I get it! He saw something horrible and that's the third time that I've hurt him...is it?

Yesterday was shitty.

Because I kept asking questions he get angry. I wanted to know who else was in his heart. I wanted to be the only one, truly...why though's the question. Yet I annoyed him and he said things that were exactly the truth and I punched him.

If I never ran and stayed in listen instead of being immature... He would still be here.

If I went to the mall and just didn't say anything to the Juniors and lie to protect my popularity... He would still fucking be here!

I had a choice I could've made to avoid this for both scenarios and twice...I chose the wrong fucking choice...

He knows that I was so used to bike being here and didn't like being alone, yet he left...

"William!" I look at my mom, seeing her panicked as she reached towards my face. But I swatted it away, standing as I rush to see if it's true.

Shoving my dad out the way I go to his room, opening the door as I look. Seeing an empty room as if no one was ever here.

My heartbeat increases and I chuckle as if this was a joke. Where could he have hidden if this was a joke?

It isn't.

I wipe my face, feeling tears going down my cheeks as I try to make them disappear with my hand. But they still fall and my lips tremble as I look at the empty room.

Scared at the quiet and scared at being alone.

He promised...so did I...

I want to kiss again like before, want him to hold me and listen to my explanation. Want him to be slightly upset but still love me.

What the hell is this?

Why would Arthur leave me?! He didn't even hear me out...!

I leave the room in anger going back to my room to see my parents. Glaring at them I know I was still crying and looking like a guy who got hid heartbroken.

"Why'd you let him get on the jet!? Why didn't you keep him here so that I could-!?"

"He insisted! Said he was done and couldn't be here anymore. That if you woke up and explained the situation that he'd end up forgiving you and couldn't have himself fall pitifully into your trap... William, he told us about your relationship."

I shake my head, not even caring at this point.

"So if you knew how I fe - felt about him then...you should've made him stay!" I stutter, crying as they looked at me differently.

"That's not what he told us William." My dad quivered, and I glare at him as I wipe my eyes of tears that keep falling.

"What the fuck did he say?!"

"He told us that he was in love with you and that you said you liked him. We said it was okay and that we could tell that we both brought you together and you both fell for another. He said you two got closer in Thailand and that you both made these cute promises.

"Well, you broke it three times and he said he didn't want to hear your explanation for the fear that he'd just bring you in and act like it never happened. Saying he was over it, that hearing what you said may have not been true. But since it was you, he couldn't tell.

"The whole time he told us this he had one tear, that's the first time I've seen him cry... William, what exactly did you say-?"

"There was two annoying closet soccer players who were fanboying over him! Their group of friends were at the mall at the same time and they were saying shit. So out of fear to protect my popularity I lied... Saying horrible things and I didn't know he was there - I don't even know how the hell he got there! But he heard and now I'm here."

I had a good thing going for me, then I ruined it with my mouth and lies.

This has to be a joke.

"Did he seriously-."

"Yes William. Arthur is no longer here, he left for the airport an hour ago."

I look at the clock, seeing that it was 12:00PM.

"When does he board he plane." I say quietly, and they don't answer me.

I just grab my keys, knowing he was at the LAX airport.

"When does he fucking board I said!" I snap, and my mom sighs.

"1:00. By the time you get there he'll be-."

I rush out, going down the stairs quickly as I was going to try to get to the airport.

I can't end our memories of one another like this... I won't allow it!

****

I park my car, going inside as I looked around. Looking at the clock, he was set to leave in ten minutes and I can't get across the gates without a ticket.

So practically what did I come here for?

I won't be able to see him either way...

Wiping my eyes I begin to cry again until I see a tall black guy at the bag area where it goes through an x-ray to see if he has anything.

He looks confused as a officer tries explaining everything to him and he just looks baffled.

I rush over, saying Arthur's name and as I got closer he began to look more like him.

Right when I was there I was met with a gate, stopping me from getting to him.

"Arthur!" I shout, and he looks. His eyes glaring at me and he nodded at the woman. Walking towards me, I got excited wondering if this was my chance.

"Why you here-?"

"Don't leave me." I plead, grabbing his arm and he yanks it my grasp.

"No. You hurt me three times. You break promise and you say mean thing about me at mall. I thought you like me..."

"I do-!"

"No. You like popularity more. I know, William." He interrupts, making me shake my head.

"I'll fix that and I want to fix us. But Arthur, please, you have to understand."

"I understand." I grin." But what I not understand is why you plead you like me when you clear like popularity more. It not matter-."

"I know! Arthur just...don't leave."

He grins, going over the gate, he now stands in front of me as he grins. His arms wrap around me as he draws me into a hug, and I'm happy that he forgave me at least.

It seemed like it...

"Je ne peux plus me blesser, je ne peux plus tomber dans ton piège pour me blesser tôt ou tard. Je dois partir si tu ne veux pas que mon amour pour toi se désintègre." ( I can't get hurt again, I can't fall into your trap once more only to get hurt sooner or later. I have to leave if you don't want my love for you to disintegrate. ) He whispers, and he pulls away suddenly.

"Arthur..." I plead, watching as he stepped back and over the gate. Going to his suitcases as he grabbed them. Making me think back to when I first met him and saw those things...

He got the rest of his things and my vision became blurred. Looking away as I looked to the ground, trying to hide the fact that I was on the verge of crying.

Until I feel a kiss on my temple, making me look up and see him standing in front of me. A melancholy expression that made me want to cry more as he leaned towards me, kissing me as if it was the last time...

"You my Bastille. I thought I bring big mob to free you to my arms...but it not big enough...yet." I frown in confusion as he whispers these things against my lips." 14 Juillet." ( July 14 )

Then he bolted off as I realized he was two minutes away from his plane boarding.

But all I did was watch him disappear and get farther, tears already streaming as I got stares. Yet I didn't give a fuck, I just was so preoccupied and my mind full of Arthur that I didn't even care...

Storming off, I wipe my face as I shove people out of my way. My mind thinking about him and the two things he gave me that were deemed important to me. Almost like hints...

'Bastille' and '14 Juillet'. 

What important about July 14? And what's Bastille?

'You my Bastille. I thought I bring big mob to free you to my arms...but it not big enough...yet.'

I remember, wondering what a mob had to with that word and I grabbed my phone. Typing the word into Google.

Coming upon a definition for it.

Bastille | ba'sti^l |
a fortress in Paris built in the 14th century and used in the 17th-18th centuries as a state prison. Its storming by the mob on 14 July 1789 marked the start of the French Revolution.

I blush, trying to piece together what he said and trying to tell me...

I'm a prison?

I'm a prisoner in this prison and he brought a mob to free me? But it wasn't big enough, even though he thought it was exceedingly large enough to free me...? Is he saying I'm worth it enough to start the French Revolution...?...

"That's so sweet..." I find myself croaking sadly, crying even more.

But as I look at this date, July 14, what is he trying to tell me? What's so important about July 14th...?

****present****

"I don't know if I should fucking punch you in the face, I win..."

I look down at Nathan as he was crying about Arthur. But hell, he'll never cry as much as I did. Never.

"Go ahead, I deserve it." I mumble, and he narrows his eyes at me." Arthur loved me and I ruined it because I had to lie to protect my popularity. Nobody here is important to me and yet I cared so much... So go a-fucking-head, punch me."

I say this loud enough for others to hear, not caring as they look confused. Dylan grinning, Bella and Talia there too.

The only people I care about is them. They've been true to me for a long time and still are... It's like what the psychologist said in Las Vegas...

'Follow your heart. Don't live your life trying to come to others approval. As long as the ones closest to you are happy with it, isn't that all that matters? You seem like your eighteen and your at the point of your life where you want to live up to others expectations. But when it comes to love, you don't need to please anyone. Not me, not your friends, not your parents, only the two of you.'

So, here it is...

Nathan just glared at me, people still not comprehending my words because they're all dumb as fuck. But he did, watching as he shook his head and just walked away.

Looking away, I leave the crowd as people begin to follow me. Until I look at them, turning around as they fall still.

"I want to be alone right now, what don't you get about my position?" I ask, and Dylan nods, him getting everyone away as everyone left. Except Bella.

Glaring at her, I walk on as don't want to look at her or speak to her right now. But I hear her behind me and she isn't trying to hide it either.

"Bella, please." I quiver, wishing it was Arthur behind me instead.

I suddenly feel her arm hug me and I shake my head, knowing I was crying as I thought more about Arthur. Making me feel way worse than I ever could imagine as I thought about the events more and more.

"I don't understand..." I whimper, crying as I just wanted Arthur here. I wasn't digging this whole element that was going on around here. I missed him and I missed how...naturally he made me happy without trying.

Never realizing how sad I truly was and how pitiful my life was without him in it... Was I always this pathetic?

"William I've never seen you cry like this..." She says softly, and I don't care if she sees me in my most pitiful state. I'm too distracted on him and what I lost.

"Do you realize what I've done?!" I shove her away, rubbing at my tears as I get enraged." I lost Arthur, and he was the best thing I had going for my life. He made me happy and I was too blindsided by what others thought I didn't focus on the two of us... Now look at me! I'm a damn wreck!"

She just looks at me, and I sneered.

"You love him."

I glare at her," Of course I do, why do you think I'm losing my mind like this?!" I yell, and her face becomes red in embarrassment.

If I didn't love Arthur I don't think I'd be acting like this.

It's like the cheesy movies and songs, don't know what you had until it was gone... Arthur is a great example...

A fucking great example and I lost him. Because of me.

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