Small note before the chapter: I don't know if you guys remember but I mentioned in a previous chapter that Kai is extremely sensitive and tends to cry over things easily. So please don't bash him if he cries a lot. He's just sensitive.

Anywayssss enjoy~

When Kai walked back into his house with a new set of tears streaming down his face, his mother walked towards him with a worried frown.

"Kai, sweetheart what's wrong?" She asked but Kai shook his head and ran to his room slamming his door behind him.

His body was shaking as he walked to his bed and grabbed his phone. He had to fix this. He had to fix this.

He wanted to call Nicolas and tell him to come back. He wanted to tell him that he's sorry for being so stupid, again. He wanted to tell him the words he hadn't said when he was here.

But he was also terrified to call him so instead he wiped his tears away and laid down on his bed while opening up their text conversation. He wanted to say so much but at the same time he had no idea what to say.

As he laid there contemplating what to do, ten minutes passed, then thirty and then it had been an hour with Kai staring at his phone with trembling hands.

At the end he settled for a simple,

Goodnight ♡

He waited for Nicolas to read it but he never did. Nicolas always replied quickly to him. Why wasn't he answering?

Kai started to panic all over again but he forced himself to relax. Nicolas wasn't mad at him.

He wasn't.

Then why was he not answering?

Kai groaned and hit himself with his pillow. He laid there checking his phones for hours but an answer never came. And before he knew it, it was one am and his phone slipped from his grasp as his eyes fluttered shut.

-

"Kai?" He heard a knock on his door that drowsed him from his sleep. His eyes shot open as he sat up and searched for his phone.

"Kai? Wake up sweetheart it's Christmas!" His mom said from over the door and he had never been more thankful that his parents never entered his room without his permission.

He looked like a mess.

His eyes were red and swollen and there were still traces of dried up tears on his cheeks. He was still wearing the same outfit as yesterday and he itched to take a shower.

"I'm coming mom." He told her and after a moment he heard her retreating footsteps.

He finally found his phone and when he opened it his stomach churned at the sight of no text messages from Nicolas.

Not even a Merry Christmas.

Nicolas always texted him Merry Christmas. Not one year had he not.

Maybe his phone died.

Kai tried to make excuses so he wouldn't let the panic take over. Nicolas would call him soon. He would come here and Kai could apologize and tell him what he should have yesterday and then they would go to bed, together.

Everything will be fine.

Kai got out of bed and took a shower then changed into his pjs and went downstairs to greet his parents. He felt like a ghost as he hugged them and sat down to eat the mountain of waffles his mom made him.

She was looking at him worriedly but didn't ask him anything in front of his dad. If his dad found out he had been crying yesterday he would loose his shit, and they both knew that.

They moved to the living room where his parents gave him his gifts with bright smiles which he managed to give one back, much smaller but a smile nonetheless.

He opened his gifts and this time a real smile came over his face. They had bought him a bunch of new clothes and a new pair of shoes he had been eyeing. He smiled and handed them his gifts, a reservation to their favourite restaurant for tonight and a new dress for his mom. He also got a matching tie for his dad.

"Kai." His mom said when his dad went over to the kitchen. "Do you want to talk about what happened last night?"

"No." Kai shook his head, biting his lips to contain the urge to cry, again. God he was such a crybaby and he hated it.

"Okay sweetie. But I'm here for you okay?" She said squeezing him into her arms and kissed his head before going to join her husband in the kitchen.

He checked his phone for the million time and his heart leapt when he saw a notification but then his shoulders slumped when he saw that it was Lee asking him to call him.

He rang his brothers number, desperate to hear his comforting his voice.

"Merry Christmas little bro!" He heard Lee shout as soon as he picked up.

"Merry Christmas." Kai said and Lee could immediately notice something was off.

"Is everything okay?" Lee asked softly.

"I don't know." Kai answered honestly.

"Is it Nicolas? Did he hurt you?" Lee asked with a hint of anger and guilt swarmed Kai.

"Nicolas didn't hurt me...I was the one who.." his voice broke and Lee sighed.

"Kai, whatever you did, you know Nicolas lo-likes you too much to be mad. Just talk to him. You guys shouldn't be upset at each other during Christmas." Lee said and Kai noticed that he was about to say love.

"I tried Lee. I tried to talk to him but he won't answer." Kai replied.

"He's suppose to come over in the afternoon right? When he does talk to him okay? I'm sorry Kai but I need to go I think Bella is feeling sick." Lee said and Kai bid him goodbye and closed his eyes.

If Nicolas came.

-

It was 7pm and Kai had sent Nicolas over 20 text messages with no answer. He hadn't even read the goodnight from last night.

Kai could feel himself crumbling. His overthinking tendencies made him think of the worst case scenarios and he wanted to run from his own thoughts.

He sluggishly made his way downstairs where his mom was getting ready to head out for dinner. She turned around to look at him and saw him plop down on the couch.

He gave up on trying to fix his appearance, so his hair was all over the place and his eyes, still red and swollen and he was still wearing his pjs.

"That's it." His mother said and walked over to him, sitting down next to him and grabbing his arm so he would look at her.

"Talk to me Kai." She pleaded and his resolve broke.

He fell into her arms and she immediately wrapped them around him in a hug as he sobbed into her chest unceasingly, hands clutching at her dress. She held him in silence, rocking him slowly as his tears soaked the same dress he had gifted her.

"Shh it's okay." She cooed rubbing his back for comfort.

"M-mom." Kai whimpered pulling away.

"Tell me what this is about Kai." She said softly wiping his tears away.

"I-I'm gay." He blurted out and she cocked her head.

"Sweetie, I know." She smiled and he shook his head.

"T-thats not it. I-I'm gay and I hurt N-Nicolas. We're d-dating and and I hurt him m-mom." He was a mess not even comprehending the own words coming out of his mouth but he went on and his mother patiently listened.

"H-he's always so so sweet t-to me and I hurt him. H-he planned such a c-cute and thoughtful g-gift. He remembered a-all the memories, e-even the ones I forgot and t-then he told me he l-loved me. A-and I didn't say it b-back because I''m so stupid"  He quavered and her face softened.

"Why didn't you say it back? Do you not love him?" She asked cautiously.

"I do mom. I l-love him so much that it h-hurts. But I was so overwhelmed and t-then all the things his mother said and the p-people and I just couldn't say it. But I want to. I w-want to tell him how m-much I love him but he won't answer. He d-didn't come. He a-always comes!" Kai said shakily and rubbed at his clenching chest.

His heart was hurting.

"Kai you need to communicate with Nicolas. Now I don't know what his mother or the 'people' said or did but if it's bothering you and is affecting your relationship then you need to talk to Nicolas about it." She told him.

"I know mom! I want to tell him everything but he won't answer." Kai repeated as frustration grew in him.

"Then go to him." She said and he looked up at her. "Go find him Kai and tell him about your feelings."

Kai got up and was ready to leave right there and then but his mom grabbed his arm.

"Look at yourself. You look like a zombie. You need to get some sleep and it's late. His mother is home. If she's against you and Nicolas then I don't think she'll let you in." His mom said and his shoulders slumped.

"Tomorrow morning okay? You can drive your dad's car." She assured him and he nodded.

"Nicolas wouldn't ignore you like this Kai. There must be a reason why he hasn't been answering or why he didn't show up. He loves you more then anything." She added to comfort him and he nodded.

"I love you mom." He whispered hugging her and she smiled hugging him back.

"I love you too." She replied.

As Kai walked back into his room he thought back to his mother's words.

Nicolas wouldn't ignore you like this. There must be a reason.

But what?

Hellooo! I hope you enjoyed. This update came much sooner then planned since I was in the writing mood but I don't think any of you guys are gonna complain. I'm sure even the next few updates are gonna come soon but if they don't I'm sorryyy.

Please don't forget to vote and comment!