Chapter 43/190: Cardiocompass

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Esteban Gonçalez' words hit me like a truck, as I recalled Emilia's desperate expression while begging Mr. Ellington to help her earlier.

And it occurred to me at that.

A statement I have often read in several books back in the days where I loved reading about the concept of love.

It was a simple line mentioned on several occasions.

'...The fact that in every relationship, there exists the person who loves the other more.'

And that was what Emilia most likely was.

From before him, my employer stiffened, clearly having not expected such a blunt and honest answer.

"I knew Emilia will search for me." Esteban spoke, keeping his harsh look, "And I knew she will guess I am a coffee shop owner, which is why I opted for running the business from the outside." He then shrugged, "I have to say though, I did not expect her to still remember that I played the flute, that was back when she couldn't sleep in elementary."

My heart ached, as I clenched my fists.

Hey you, what the hell...

I bit my lips, stepping in his direction.

Why are you speaking this... indifferently...

"I don't understand." I forced my voice out, "Are you really... the person we're looking for?"

Again, the woman's despair shot to my mind, and somehow, I got even madder at the thought.

"Are you really the man Emilia is willing to give up her entire inheritance for?" I clenched my teeth, "What the fuck?"

I ignored the glare I received from my employer at my foul language, as I stepped closer in Esteban's direction.

His eyes were pinned to me, clearly having no idea who I was. Well, couldn't blame him, I've barely known Emilia for a day.

But it was enough time to see how far she was willing to go for the love she had for him.

Parting his lips, he kept his numb expression, "Ah, that kid. I warned her about spending her inheritance carefully."

My eyes widened, as I felt goosebumps cross my body in anger. I tightened my jaw, as my eyes stung.

I genuinely felt so bad for the woman.

Maybe, just maybe subconsciously...

I was starting to... regain some empathetic thoughts I had about the concept of love.

Ones I had... before my vow.

And ones that resurfaced...

After the realization I made about my... labyrinth, lately.

Gulping, I kept my eyes fixed into his, "How can you say this?" My teeth clenched again, "Emilia is basing her entire life on you! Emilia loves you more than her own freedom! She's willing to risk her freedom for what she shares with you!!" My voice shook desperately, in an attempt to knock some senses into him.

And yet somehow, he seemed unshaken.

Numb. That was the word.

His gaze remained unmoving, as his green eyes reflected deep darkness, as he moved his jaw. "She'll get over it. It's fine."

And he reached for his hat on the ground, picking it up with the few tips in it, as he moved to walk away, after he'd rendered me wordless with his unexpected attitude.

And that was where that unmistakable, earth-shattering, and authoritative voice came absolute:

"Emilia is getting married in less than six hours, Señor Gonçalez."

From before me, Esteban shuddered, and that was where I saw some expression on his numb face since I'd first seen him today. "Huh?"

His eyes were wide, and his lips parted, as he turned towards my employer in pure stun.

Mr. Ellington kept his composed expression, fixing his frozen beads into the ex-butler of Emilia Morte. "Her wedding is at twelve in the afternoon. Silas Corazòn, one of her father's business partners."

I bit my lips, observing the fact that Esteban Gonçalez's expression still did not recover. It remained so for more seconds, until it finally darkened again, and the darkness in his eyes deepened even further, as he tightened his jaw.

And he turned towards me. Fixing his eyes into mine.

As though rubbing it in my face.

"See what I meant?"

And I felt it.

All that pain and... hurt in his voice. He tried to coat them with grudge and indifference.

Yet clear pain was there, and I was a master at uncovering such things at this point.

I pursed my lips, "You're wrong! She didn't-"

Apparently, my employer had already planned out the continuing of the news he was breaking.

"She will be running away from the wedding before her vows. Specifically, waiting for you to elope."

And again, the butler's expression mirrored stun, as he turned towards Mr. Ellington. "What?"

The president still fixed Esteban with his chilly look, as he moved his jaw. "I have no interest in the reasons behind any of your current actions, Señor Gonçalez. Neither am I willing to waste my time attempting to change your mind." He spoke, freezing his tone, "However, I believe I must point out that your lies are too clear to the mere observer."

I gasped, and so did Esteban blink. He... what was he pointing at?!

Reaching for his wristwatch, Mr. Ellington eyed it barely. "Claiming you are indifferent about the woman's choices, somehow as though you... harbor no mutual connections to her...." He paused, shooting the coffee shop a glance before he snapped his gaze to capture the slightly shaking eyes of the man before him.

"Seems quite farfetched and inapplicable to a man who has named his shop's signature 'Emilia', and cared enough to preserve the coffee taste the way she preferred it."

Esteban gasped, and so did I.

His majesty didn't mind us, as he hardened his gaze further, "Think of it, even though none of the customers would know the difference, you still opted for reminding the employee to prepare it the way Emilia preferred it." My employer kept his gaze fixed into Esteban's at this. "In a sense, it was as though you're preserving Emilia's essence in what you do, no?"

From before me, I eyed as the ex-butler's adam's apple bobbed, while he pursed his lips, and his jaw tightened. His expression was back to normal at this, and his entire body shook slightly, yet he remained wordless.

Weirdly enough, Mr. Ellington, man of steel who just labeled conversing with Esteban as a waste of time... Had shed light on small details even Esteban himself possibly did not realize.

And neither did I.

Apparently following this, Mr. Ellington really had run out of interest in 'convincing' Esteban or any of the sort, as he just turned, "Notify Alba we are leaving, Thorne. Let her notify Emilia in turn."

I gulped, "What? But... But we can't-"

"I realized I am going to be Emilia's biggest heartbreak since she first told me she loved me when she turned sixteen."

My eyes widened at the words that had just escaped Esteban Gonçalez in a low, slightly shaking voice.

Mr. Ellington did not turn, yet stopped in his tracks, as though giving the butler the green light to talk.

"I was a twenty-seven year-old bachelor, bedding different women daily and enjoying my butler job as a part-time to my main one." He spoke, and his voice shook further. "I held great endearment to the girl back then, but had always viewed her as a little sister, and I told her that when she confessed."

I gulped, and saw as his hand shook as he raised it up to pass his fingers through his hair.

"She told me she was fine with that as long as I stayed by her side everyday." His eyes turned into glasses at this, "Seems like the ideal and perfect ending to a passive and childish feelings of a teenage girl who mistook her brotherly feelings towards her butler for those of love, no?"

I eyed him worriedly, as he fixed his eyes into no particular target at this.

And deep sorrow flashed through them, as he shuddered at his own words.

"Yet somehow, I started seeing her differently after that."

I gulped, feeling the pain in his tone.

"I started pulling attitudes when I saw her out with all the boys from her school. I attempted pushing her away whenever she acted like the spoilt kid I had accustomed her to be. I introduced her to random flings I had just to show her that she should move on." His lips shook, and he clenched his teeth so hard.

As he moved his hand from his hair, to over his forehead and eyes.

And my eyes widened as I saw a single, lonely tear trace down his cheek.

"But in fact, the person I was trying to convince to move on was none other than myself."

A shaking breath escaped him, and I eyed how what appeared to be the most composed mature man ever was crumbling right before us as all his powerful façade was fading.

"And if anything, in the process of pushing her away, I ended up pulling her even closer."

I bit my lips at the pain in his voice, and a growl-like sob escaped him, as he struggled to maintain his composure.

"She finally turned eighteen, and she... she confessed again." He clenched his jaw harder, "And even though I had planned to leave the household for good after celebrating one last birthday with her..."

My heart sank, seeing the agony he was in and the inner conflict he was reliving as though it was yesterday.

"I could not do it after she confessed for the second time."

My eyes widened, and my stomach churned as his voice shook.

"Especially that this time, I... I loved her back." He let out a shaking breath, "And that was how I took her first kiss, and many other firsts, after she turned eighteen." His hand shook as it clutched over his forehead.

And I felt it at this.

The thing prevalent most in his voice.

It was helplessness.

And despair.

He shifted, wiping away his traitor tear at this, as he gulped, attempting to compose his voice. "And we remained leading this double life for years... until lady Esmeralda discovered, yet she somehow was okay with it, contrary to Señor Morte, who we knew would never accept this."

He moved his jaw, his orbs freezing in pure numbness at this, "And we were right, if anything. The moment he learned, last month, he exiled me, froze my bank accounts, forced my company to dismiss me, and labelled me as a drug smuggler in Coruña, all to prevent me from any way of remaining with his daughter."

My body shook, as this method reminded me of another business tyrant chairman who does the same things to torture those who defy him.

"And as my shitty nights passed, and amongst the millions of plans I arranged to go back and get her... I eventually realized one thing through it all..." He placed the hat which had a few coins on his head, and the coins fell over him and onto the ground recklessly, as he turned to leave.

"I was never worthy of Emilia."

My eyes widened, "Huh?"

"I could not keep the only promise she asked me to keep, and that is to stay by her side. I was kicked out of her life forcefully like a dog." He clenched his jaw, "I needed to realize that we come from two different worlds, and that... while she has the opportunity to become an amazing lady and political figure, I will always be a humble butler and accountant at a company."

My heart broke at his words, as he gulped again, and I could feel the pain in his previous words as his voice broke at the end.

"She deserves someone better. Someone who is worthy of her." His voice clearly disappeared at the end, and I saw a tear stroll down his face as he started leaving. "Tell her that I know she is strong enough to make it through thi-"

"No!!!" I found myself moving as I interjected desperately, cutting him off.

I placed myself before him, blocking his way, and my expression shook.

"This is not what Emilia needs! This is not how you make her happy! This is not you choosing what's best for her, Esteban!" I sniffed.

From before me, the adam froze, fixing his orbs into mine with clear confusion, as though not getting why this stranger was almost crying over his love story.

"Emilia is no longer a child!" I hardened my voice, fixing my eyes into his, "You need to trust her choices!" I reached out for the shirt on either his shoulders, clutching it as I attempted shaking some sense into him. "You need to step out of the idea that you are the butler choosing the best for his lady!"

His eyes widened at my words, as my heart ached further, remembering how broken the woman without him was.

"It's time you view her like a mature woman! Because all along, she's been viewing you like a man, not her older brother-like butler!" I bit my lips hard, "If she chose you, that means she realizes you are where her real happiness lies!" I pleaded, "Please don't do this!"

Esteban's lips shook, as he gulped, moving his jaw as his eyes reflected more pain and helplessness.

I didn't await his answer, as a pained smile broke to my lips, and I eyed him empathetically.

"I understand what it means to let go of someone because you love them, Señor Esteban."

My heart ached, remembering the several times I pushed people around me away to ensure their safety or happiness.

Some feet away, I could see from the edge of my eye that the Ellington President shifted. As for the man before me, he just blinked, as his expression darkened even further with pain.

"But sometimes you just end up hurting them more." I mumbled, and my expression gloomed again.

Stepping back as I looked at the butler in front of me, I could tell he was living an agonizing conflict within himself.

And I felt terrible for him.

Because I knew he was doing what he was doing for Emilia's sake.

Because he genuinely hated himself for starting something he was powerless to finish.

I sighed, fixing my orbs into his. "I will not pressure you further, but I have a... request of you, and I hope you try to do it." My voice shook, as the images of both Emilia Morte and Esteban Gonçalez crying for the sake of each other shot to my mind.

Emilia's butler blinked at me with his numb expression, and I just gulped as I fixed my orbs into his.

"I want you to please go over your memories with Emilia throughout the past years."

His eyes widened at me in pure stun, and I forced more words out of my pained chest.

"Remember the good times and the bad ones." A tear strolled down my cheek, "The tears and the smiles." I whispered, "And please evaluate..." The eyes of the man before me turned into ultimate glass at this, and I could see how deep the love he harbored for Emilia was.

"Evaluate whether you will ever get over losing such a love or whether you'll move on from it, knowing that Emilia feels the same about you."

A soft sob escaped me as I felt my own words so deep, goodness...

Why... are my memories going back on their own...

As though projecting my own methodology against me...?

Why am I... reminiscing my memories with... Mr. Ellington...? Huh?

I wiped the tear from my cheek at this, and I stepped back, nodding at the butler, "Please take care of yourself, Señor Gonçalez." As I moved towards Mr. Ellington, and we started moving away.

My heart sank as we walked away, and I bit my lips as I remembered Emilia's desperate expression one last time.

.

.

.

After around fifteen minutes of silent walking, we reached the main road again, and I eyed as his majesty signaled to stop a cab for us.

Sighing, I turned to look back at the coffee street one last time.

I don't want to leave with bringing him ba-

My eyes widened, as I spotted a silhouette running in our direction from afar.

He waved at me, and I gasped.

"W-Wait a second... Woah!!!!!" I couldn't help but exclaim.

This man running towards us.

I eyed the freshly shaven squared jaw, as well as the now fixed hair, in addition to casual, non-worn out clothes.

As he marched in our direction like some trained professional runner.

You would hardly believe he was thirty something.

Esteban Gonçalez reached us in like a minute, as he panted loudly, "We need something faster than a train to reach Coruña! I contacted Señorita Emilia's private jet captain, let's head to the meeting point!"

I gaped at him, and his majesty Ellington eyed him with his poker face expression, "You contacted the private jet?"

The butler eyed my employer back with his beauteous jades, as he pursed his lips, nodding professionally, "Even though he serves the Morte family, he is my acquaintance, and I know I can depend on him in such an emergency. For now, let's go to the airport, my car is parked by that street!"

We marched behind him, and I got the chance to observe his makeover more clearly at this.

As we reached his car, I smiled at him genuinely as he unlocked it, remembering how I told Emilia to look nice for him.

"You look nice. I'm sure Emilia will be happy." I murmured cheerfully.

He seemed slightly taken aback by my compliment, as he smiled enchantly at me.

For a second, I could tell this was the attitude Emilia had fallen for.

This genuine, yet maturely calm butler of hers.

Opening the backseat door for me, he kept his casual smile, "After you, M'lady."

I flushed, fidgeting as I saw his majesty had come in already, not really having time for the chitchats. Yikes! He's probably shooting random glares at this one minute waste of time!

Esteban took the driver seat at this, and his majesty took that of the passenger, as we drove off.

"We have a twenty minute drive towards the airport, then a fifty-five minutes wait in the airport before the jet arrives," He informed us.

I nodded silently, and eyed as his majesty Ellington wordlessly, ran through documents in his phone.

Checking out my own phone at this, I realized five more hours separated us from the wedding. Mild panic hit me, and the driver shot me a look at this.

"I have a question, Señorita Thorne, was it?" He spoke, gently.

I fidgeted, nodding awkwardly, "Yes?"

From beside him, I sensed some chilly gaze just fixing him wordlessly, as he struck up a conversation with... me?

Somehow, Esteban seemed to be overwhelmed by everything taking place to notice the threats being issued in his direction, as he maintained his peaceful smile at me. "How did you know that asking me to reminisce over my memories will Emilia will make me realize I could never move on from her?"

I blinked, flushing softly, as I seriously did not expect his question.

Wow, c-could this be the beginning of Cherry the Relationship consultant?!!

I fidgeted, collecting my ideas honest and most spontaneous thoughts. "Well, it all started with the things Mr. Ellington point at, frankly." I mumbled as I rubbed my chin thoughtfully, and spoke slowly, "B-But then when you

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