***STEAM WARNING***

Trace kisses me like the world is ending. Our hands are in motion everywhere, like we have no grip on reality, just each other. He breaks away and I make a small cry of protest.

"That kiss should tell you everything you need to know about why I brought you here," he says harshly. His hand is on my jaw, keeping my head in place, my eyes locked to his. "I want you here with me. The way I want you has nothing to do with your sister. I want you because you're my best friend and I've missed the fuck out of you, but also because since I kissed you two and half years ago,  I haven't been able to forget it, no matter how hard I've tried. And believe me, I've tried. Finally I just gave up trying to forget and just started counting the days until you graduated. I was waiting for you  to be sure in yourself-- enough to make your own decisions about what you want. Because it's you I want, Kat. I want to be with you so bad I think I'm fucking obsessed with you or something."

Trace is drunk, but there's something so raw and honest in the way he's looking at me that all my own irritation melts away. I want him, too. I want so much more than sex, but I can't for the life of me understand why he's not inside of me right now, because it's what we both want, and it seems like it would be a damn good way to ease some of our obsessive wanting of each other. 

I kiss him back, even harder than he just kissed me. "I want to feel you so bad right now, Trace. I don't want the Love Tree. I need you now, Trace. I swear, I'm ready." I pull him to me. His hands grip my hips, but he pulls away from kissing me.

"I'm wasted, Kat." His voice is strained, like his body doesn't agree with what he's saying. "I'm not going to take you like that, the first time. You don't want that."

"Take me? God, you're such a...man. You know this is the twenty-first century, right? Why should you get to make the decision about my first time? Just because I have an intact hymen, doesn't mean I don't know what I want."

He makes a disgusted sound and shoots me a slightly bleary, irritated look from beneath his dark brows."Has it occurred to you that it's not just your first time? It's our first time together? I want to be in it, Kat. I don't want a blurry fuck."

"Oh." Actually, I hadn't thought of it like that at all. I lay my head on his chest "That's really sweet, Trace."

He sighs. "Maybe it's not very manly to say, but I want to make love to you, with my body and my heart and soul and all that shit, especially the first time. And I can't give you the best of me right now."

I get the feeling I've hurt his feelings a little bit, being so...relentless in the pursuit of losing my virginity to him. Somehow, I've made him feel like a non-person in the event.

"Hey, Trace?"

"Yeah?" His voice is a little flat.

"I see what you mean. And I want that too, for our first time. I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. I didn't mean to use man like a dirty word. I like the kind of man you are. Very much." 

His arm comes around me. "It's okay. Thanks, though. Sometimes it's not easy being a dude these days."

We breathe together, both slightly frustrated. After a few minutes, I say, "Okay, I get why tonight's not the not for us to make love for the first time.  But...are you too drunk to mess around?"

His eyes are closed, and his face is expressionless, but I see his Adam's apple dip in slow motion.  "What did you have in mind?"

"I want you to touch me, and I want to touch you, too." I whisper. I slowly bring his hand to where I want it, and I brush across him. He's hard, and he groans. "Please, Trace. We will both feel so much better."

He frowns. "You've done this before? Gotten off with..." he hesitates, not wanting to use Colin's name and put him in the bed with us, "another person?"

I'm not sure what the frown is about, but I am sure honesty is the way to go in this situation. "Yes."

The frown eases, but only slightly.  "If you're sure you're comfortable..."

"I'm not at all comfortable, that's the problem," I say, kissing his neck. "Please Trace, I'm so...tense I'm going to lay here sleepless all night. Please, make me come, ok?"

This time, there's no other way to describe the sound he makes except what it is...a moan of surrender. "Christ Kat, the way you talk..." he mumbles as he fills my mouth with his tongue.

He strokes up beneath my shirt, teasing my ribs while he kisses me, sliding his hands around to my bare back. His touch feels wonderful, but he's killing me slowly, raking his calloused fingers everywhere but the most sensitive places. I'm nearly panting with desire by the time he slowly, tenderly cups my breast and strokes a thumb around my nipple.

I let out a whimper and my hand goes almost involuntarily to his crotch, rubbing against him. He growls—deep and guttural, and his calloused fingers tense, squeezing my breast. I jump, my eyes flying wide. The pressure he's using feels good, but I've never heard Trace make a sound like that.

"Sorry," he murmurs, his hand stilling as he sighs against my ear, and he returns to stroking my back. "I didn't mean to scare you, but god...I'm about to fucking lose it, Kat. I want you that bad."

"You didn't scare me...I...I..." I stop lying. I'm no good at it right now. "It's okay, I'm just not used to you in bed yet."

"Which is why we need the Love Tree." He gently removes my hand from rubbing him. "Let's go a little easy, ok?  Just let me touch you tonight."

He hitches my leg over his hip and moves against me. He traces up my inner thigh, past my sleep shorts.

"You're sure?" he asks again.

"For god's sake, get in there," I plead. He snickers and slips inside my panties.

I've been touched before, but Trace's expert caress sets me off like I've never experienced. I'm literally clawing at him, craving more from the first light, teasing touch. He's very gentle at first, but soon, he's all hands working and hips grinding and he's saying dirty things, as he explores me with his fingers, and demanding I tell him which of the ways he's touching me I like best and adjusting with my panted, nearly incoherent answers. Wheedling, coaching me to say dirty things about the pleasure I'm feeling, and chuckling in pleasure himself as the filthy things I've never said before fall off my lips at his coaxing. It's all wildly new and exciting to me, this kind of sexy pillow talk. It doesn't make me feel embarrassed or dirty...it makes me feel connected to him.

Then the dirty playfulness fades as I get totally lost in his touch and can't use words anymore. There's a live wire from my brain to the place Trace is touching me and the surge keeps building and building until it's almost blinding. Trace growls at me again—this time a harsh command for me to come for him, and it's like my body was just waiting for him to say it. I ride over the edge while he's holding me tight. I may have cried out things, I'm not sure. It was all a white hot blur of wonderful.

Afterward, I'm...boneless and shivering. He gathers me too him, pulling the covers up over me. Now his fingers feel like slow honey, warming me as they slowly trail my back.

"Feel better, baby?" he asks.

I nuzzle into his neck, like a kitten. "Mmmm...not just better...I feel...best ever."

He laughs. "That doesn't even make sense. But it sounds positive, so I'll take it." He flips me over, pulling me against him, settling us to sleep. I can feel his hardness. Poor guy, it's unrelenting, but he doesn't complain.

I reach a lazy hand behind me. "Trace, are you sure you don't want me to..."

He grabs my hand and folds his fingers into mine, wrapping our joined arms around me. "I'm good, baby. So drunk. Just wanna sleep."

"Are you sure this is...real enough for you?" I persist. "I mean, when do ever take a girl to bed and not get sex, Rock Star?"

"Only you. Three times now," he reminds me. "But Kat, I don't care about the sex so much."

I snort, disbelieving. "Liar."

"Okay, fine. You want the truth? I can't stop thinking about having sex with you. I want to make love to you, and teach you to crave sex between us. I want to worship you, and I want to hear you say my name like a prayer. And when we've made love so much you are almost sick of me, I want to switch it up and fuck you hard, like you can't even imagine liking yet. But I promise, you will. And then, when you like it both ways, I want to do every  imaginable thing in between love-making and dirty fucking with you. I want to sex you so much we invent shit."

"You really mean that?" I ask breathless. Sometimes I get scared that Trace can't move past the idea of me as an innocent kid he's supposed to take care.

"Abso-fucking-lutely," he assures me. "But sex is not all I care about with you. This...just me and you together again...this is just as real as all that," he squeezes me slightly, "And it feels...like more than sex. Never had it like this—where I'm more down to be giving than getting. I feel so...happy," he sounds surprised at his own assessment. "Yeah. Happy," he murmurs again, like he's getting used to the idea. "Wanna...make you happy. In every way. All ways."

He sighs, and after a few moments, I can tell he's drifting away to unconsciousness.

The flock of birds is back, making my stomach roil. Trace is so sexed, but he's also tender, and sweet, and...even wasted, he's gallant. And I'm crazy about him, and I want to make him happy, too. I fall asleep wanting to memorize the way I feel, so I can feel it forever. I'm pretty sure this is what love feels like.

Whew, Kat really needed that! They are so sweet together, aren't they? Spoiler alert...the morning after doesn't quite go like you might expect. Coming Monday!

FYI:  I wanted to give Trace and Kat one hot scene in the main body of work, but this is the limit of the level of sex detail for this book.  However, there is some frank discussion about sexual topics between Trace and Kat in upcoming chapters. Don't worry, for those more mature readers who like a little more detail, I do plan to offer explicit content as mature chapters in a  companion work, if/when we get there in the storyline. So you will have the option of reading about their advancing sexual relationship in more detail, or leaving a little to the imagination.

Please don't forget to vote if you like Trace and Kat's blossoming love affair. Or leave me a comment if you think Trace is a dirty dog. I'm very interested to hear how readers feel about Trace's behavoir/actions. He's a complicated character! Adding EPIC to your library or reading lists will let you get updates when I post!