Chapter 1:

9 Years Later:

“You look more tired than usual, something up?” I froze in mid-way of reaching into my locker.

“N-no, everything’s fine. The thunder last night kept me up.” I manage to stutter out. I didn’t want her knowing, because no one knew. I shakily retrieved my books, hoping she didn’t see past my obvious lie.

She looked slightly suspicious but I carried on shoving random books into my school bag, not sparing her a glance. Of course I was tired, I was up all last night trying to put my mother to bed, much to her distaste. Her reluctance was obvious as she hit and screamed at me. It took about two hours to finally successful for her to pass out.

“I got to go Leigh, I’ll see you tomorrow.” I abruptly told her, slamming my locker door shut. I took off in the direction of the exit, without sparing her one last glance.

I never let anyone close enough to even give them the ability to find out how fucked up my life is. Leigh is about the closest thing to a friend I have, and that’s saying a lot, because she knows near absolutely nothing about me.

Taking in a gasp of fresh air, made my heart relax, she didn’t know anything. I took off in the direction of my secret spot. Well, it wasn’t really a secret, but it was the only safe place I knew off.

With each step I took away from the school, made it a step closer to my escape. It was a boardwalk that over looked a lake which was surrounded by a maze of cliffs. At the start of the boardwalk there laid a beautiful meadow of trees and breath-taking flowers.

I took a right at the little entrance that led into the meadow. Each step my shoes made, released a fraction more of the smile that was pushing its way to the surface. I found myself walking right down to the very back where I knew the Lake would be.

There it was.

The pure, sparkling water was inviting me. It was intriguing me. I easily walked straight over to the boardwalk and sat myself down, finally at peace. I liked it like this it was calming and just easier.

It was quiet and peaceful. I stared at the flawless water, as it engulfed me, but then something, not something, someone caught my attention from the corner of my eye. Their silhouette was mirroring off the tip of one of the cliffs surrounding the lake.

It looked as if they were indecisive about a decision by the way they were walking back and forth, making the shape of a circle. I was convinced they had not seen me, by the way they never glimpsed at me. He seemed to finally set on a decision because he stood at the very edge of the cliff.

I knew what he was going to do, not because it was obvious, but because that was me every day.

He was contemplating suicide.

What I did next I didn’t let myself think about the aftermath that was yet to come, I didn’t even wavering on thinking I knew this person.

I abruptly stood up and screamed, “Stop.”

His silhouette pulled to halt, still staring down at the water, “Don’t do it.” I whispered to myself, but with the burning silence around us, I was pretty sure he heard. My heart was thundering out of chest with the agony of the wait, he didn’t move and I don’t think he wanted to.

After all, he was just caught in his most vulnerable time, a time where it was enough, things were unbearable, he decided on a final decision. He was exposed, to a complete stranger.

I could only see the faint wind whipping through his slightly tossed hair, as his broad build stood painfully still. He was too far away for me to actually make out his features, but somehow, I still knew he wasn’t lonely in the ladies department.

His figure started to depart into the trees and I set myself down on the boardwalk, relieved that someone actually listened, to me, for once.

However, he wasn’t leaving, he wasn’t going anywhere except directly towards me. My heart picked up speed, as he neared closer, because that’s when I realised I did know him.

His face was contorted in annoyance, frustration, and relief. He was storming straight over to me, looking at me with such intensity, my legs shivered. Since I was perched on the edge of the boardwalk, I gripped it with all my strength, thinking that he was going to shove me in.

Instead, he just towered over me and asked, “Why do you care if I die or not?”

To say I was taken back was an understatement, I sat there with a genuine shocked expression as I gazed back into his chocolate brown eyes, “I-I just do.” I answered hesitantly.

His head tilted in confusion, analysing everything about me, “But you don’t know me, so why?”

My palms were sweaty at the firm voice his words held, to be honest, I didn’t even know myself.

“I do know you, Trey.” I told him truthfully, because in fact he did go to my school, “You just don’t know me.”

A sly smirk formed all the way across his full lips, “Oh, but I do, Maggie.” He bent down, his fore arms resting on his thighs, so he could directly hold eye contact with me, “You think I haven’t noticed you, I have.” He smiled a genuine smile, never breaking our direct eye contact, “Quiet girl who no one knows much about, keeps to herself, not interested in having best friends or boyfriends.”

My mouth slowly formed an ‘O’ with shock. Trey is the type of guy in our school who has two friends, mysterious and gets into fights a lot he wouldn’t strike me as the person to notice a quiet girl. I heard from people though that he was actually a nice guy.

So, why was he contemplating suicide?

He seemed satisfied with my reaction as he straightened himself out, “Oh and Maggie, no one hears about this, you understand?” and just like that he was gone, he didn’t wait for a response, he just took off as quickly as he arrived.

--

It was dark and I had only left the lake just a few minutes ago, reluctantly. After sitting there for a while after Trey departed, I was settled once again. Then I realised since it was starting to get dark, I would have to eventually set off on my way home.

I didn’t want to go home, I was afraid of what I might find. It could range from my mom sprawled along the floor with bottles of wine set beside her, or Gary could be home. I was hoping for the first one.

My shoes clicked on the pavement, and I knew that my house was coming closer, too fast. My mind went into overdrive at what I could find or what could happen. Going home never meant anything good.

Walking up my porch steps, my heart was beating erratically, my hands were sweating, and my head was hurting. Unconsciously, I pulled down my sleeve, hoping somehow it would cover the cigarette burns there.

I quietly pushed open the door, not craving the attention of anyone in the house. As soon as I was in, I knew Gary wasn’t, if he was there is would always be screaming and shouting. Except now, the silence that came to meet me was deafening.

I made my way into the kitchen searching for any evidence that my mom was already drinking, I wasn’t left disappointed when I spotted the empty bottles of wine lined up on my kitchen counter.

I was slightly hoping that she was passed out, already. Pulling off my cardigan, I set it on the back of the kitchen chair. I wasted no time and went straight upstairs to my mother’s bedroom.

She was sprawled out on her bed, fully clothed. Another bottle of wine set beside her on the locker. This was why I never had close friends, imagine telling them on an average night your mother would be passed out by seven.

Releasing a deep breath, I made my way over to her bed, slowly pulled off her shoes and pulled the blanket over to cover her numb body. Her eyes were all puffy and her rosy cheeks were all tear stained. At times like this I wanted to break down, because I couldn’t take anymore.

But I couldn’t, I wouldn’t.

I’ll admit it wasn’t this bad when I was just eight years old, but as the years progressed, so did her addiction. Half the time, I would beg her to stop drinking, not only for herself, but for me. It would never work.

She would just grip my wrist and send me flying backwards telling me to shut up. Since then, I never said anything while I put her to bed, or forced her to actually eat something.

I threw her shoes down next to her bed, and grabbed the empty bottle of wine off the locker. I tried everything I could to make her stop most the time I would throw away the bottles of wine, but she would just buy more.

I reached her door and glanced back at her peaceful body. When she was sleeping, it was the only time she looked peaceful, “I hope one day, you will stop.” I whispered, as I felt the tears prickling the corners of my eyes.

I didn’t even have to empty the wine bottle because she had already drank it dry, so I just chucked it into the bin, and made my way to bedroom.

My bed was seducing me, when my sleep deprived body caught sight of it. I didn’t even bother changing, just like that I went straight into my bed still in my black leggings and oversized top. I buried my body deep in to my bed, deep down wishing I could hide in my bed, away from all my problems.

My mind drew back to Trey, as I thought what could possibly be so bad in his life that he couldn’t bare it. What pushed him to the edge of that cliff, it was clear that if I hadn’t stopped him then no one would have, and he would have accomplished what he set out to do.

There was just a little part of me that was glad he didn’t succeed, and that I was there to stop him.

* * * *

I was late, I was always late. I ran straight out my front door after quickly changing into anything I could find, which just happened to be grey sweat pants and a plain black top. I didn’t have to worry about being quiet because mother was still passed out.

It didn’t matter to me that I looked too casual, it wasn’t relevant to me. I was currently speed walking my way to school, with my books clutched tightly in my hand. Thankfully, for once, I actually had a good night sleep. 

In a way I was luckily my school was only a few minutes’ walk from my house, but now, that felt like an eternity. My palms were itching with anxiety, because I knew I would have to face Trey after what he tried to do.

But then, maybe he wouldn't remember, maybe he forgot about it? 

"He hardly forgot about it, idiot." I whispered angrily to myself, for being so stupid. No one forgets about something like that, unless he had memory loss, which I highly doubted. The school came into view, way too fast, I didn't give myself a fraction of time to even think about it, not going to school today, as I burst through the door.

The hallway was crowded with bodies, everywhere. I guess I wasn't as late as I thought. Keeping my head down, I examined the floor while making the easily known journey to my locker. This was always the way it was, no one took notice of me, if I bumped into someone they would brush it off like I was annoying fly on their shoulder.

I was invisible, to everyone or so I thought.

As I reached up and pulled open my locker, I could feel eyes burning into me. I wasn't sure whether I wanted to see who those eyes belonged to, because that would mean I was being noticed. I had someone's attention, something I was never used to.

I shakily retrieved the books that I would need for the next three classes. I released a nervous breath that I never knew I was keeping in. My palms were slick with sweat causing me to drop my biology book. 

I started to reach down to pick it up, but someone had already gotten there before me. I straightened out my spine, while never lifting my eyes from the ground. I seemed to find the person grey shoes, absolutely fascinating. I slowly took hold of the book then mumbled a brief thank you, but the other person didn’t share the same audacity, because they kept the book held tightly.

"Maggie, look at me." His deep voice commanded, it was mesmerising, I nearly, nearly lifted my eyes to look at him, but I stopped myself before I could. 

I ignored his request and continued staring at the floor. My lips formed a tight line, surprising myself I managed to ask, "Are you not afraid of getting caught talking to the unsocial freak?" I spat out, disgusted at how cruel teenagers could be.

He still hadn't let go of my book, much to my tugging. He had a pretty firm grip, "No." I couldn't help it, my head snapped up to look directly into his eyes.

They were an interesting brown with specks of green coursing through them, they bore directly into mine. His lips were in a straight firm line, and his expression was blank. Only then did I notice the scar that was going through his eyebrow. 

I already knew he had a reputation of getting into fights, and the crooked nose proved that. I still couldn't shake how attractive his strong jaw, full lips and his deep brown eyes that were currently boring into mine were.

I only realised then that he was crouching down so he was directly holding eye contact with me. He was pretty tall nearing 6'3, and I had a feeling that was the most intimidating thing about him, that, or the dangerous look in his eye.

Surprisingly enough, I wasn't scared. He didn't scare me, which was unusual considering all males scared me. There was something about him though I wasn't scared, intimidated maybe, but not scared.

"No." He repeated once again, making sure I knew he was telling the truth and I believed him. He didn't give the vibe that he actually cared about what people thought of him. I couldn't stop staring at his eyes, they were so unusual, but they looked as if they saw a lot more than they should have.

Just like mine.

I didn't know what was wrong with me, but my hands were itching to trace the scar on his eyebrow. What scared me the most was, he was the only person I felt this comfort with. I didn't know why, I barely knew him, but I wanted to get to know him. 

No, there's a reason you have no one close to you. 

I seemed to snap out of it, cleared my throat loudly, hoping it would provide me with control, it didn’t. I pulled the book out of his grasp, since he wasn’t expecting it, it was easy. I whipped around to face my locker once again, but not before I caught the look of annoyance plastered on his face.

His eyes were boring straight into me, while I nervously rearranged my books in my bag. The shrill sound if the bell went and I took that as my cue. I hugged my books tight to my chest and gave him a brief nod, “See you around, Trey.”

Setting of in the direction of my class, I didn’t get very far because he gripped my wrist tightly, making my long sleeved top hitch up to reveal the cigarette burns. His head gazed down at the wrist he had caught and my breath hitched. By the look of anger and the twitch in his jaw, he saw them.

I desperately tried to pull my wrist from his grip, but I couldn’t it was too tight. Not tight that it would hurt me, but just to prevent me from moving. My heart was racing and I was panicking, as my breath came out in short pants. I once again tried to pull my wrist out of his grip, but it was still no use.

His eyes were concentrated on the burns, his face contorted in anger, while the muscle in his jaw twitched faster as the seconds went on. He traced each one of them with his index finger, while merely whispering, “Who did this to you?” His voice was tight, controlled almost, but you would have to be deaf if you missed the anger behind it.

Oh God, he is going to think I’m some sort of freak. I could feel tears prickling at the corner of my eyes, and I knew if I did leave there soon, I was going to break down. I was franticly trying to tug my arm from his death hold grip.

Thankfully the corridor was empty and no else was seeing my slight breakdown, “Please, let me go.” It was meant to come out firm, and strong, instead it came out as a frenzied cry.

He seemed to have caught the slight shake to my voice, because that’s when his head snapped up and he stared down at me. His blank expression that was once there was replaced with fury, pure utter fury. The once mesmerizing brown eyes were laced in danger, if anyone saw the way his eyes burned fire, no one would go near him.

“Who did this to you?” He repeated, this time there was a slight shake to his voice, but his was the result of anger taking over. That was what done it, a tear slipped from the corner of my eye.

“Dude, come on.” I heard his friends call from behind me. I instinctively titled my head down so my brown locks were covering my face. I didn’t even no he had friends waiting for him, but with how far their voices were, I doubted they heard our conversation.

“Go.” It came out clipped to my ears when I realised he was not talking about me, but his friends. I heard the hushed whispers followed by their footsteps fading. They knew as well as I, with the tone his voice portrayed, it wasn’t a question, more like a statement.

My efforts went slack, because I realised I wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. I wish I could just reverse the whole day and not go to school. What if he tells everyone?

He seemed to be distracted, so I took it as my opening and wrenched my wrist out of his grip. My heart was accelerating with adrenaline as I took off running, out the entrance and down the steps. I didn’t hear his footsteps behind me, and for that I was thankful. I sprinted to the one place I knew no one would be around, the school field. Since classes were on, the field would be abandoned. I walked up the steps to the seats and sat down there. I let myself take a breath.

It was fine no one knew. He didn’t know.

I couldn’t deny that there was a part of me that wished he knew that anyone knew. Keeping a secret for so long, sometimes you just want to scream it out, so everyone knows. I heard the rowdiness of loud voices, all males. I froze and gripped the bench tightly.

I thought they would be in class. I instantly stood up and started to make my way down the steps, but it wasn’t long until I was spotted.

“Well if it isn’t Maggie.” I knew his voice even before I turned around, everyone knew him. It was Josh, the biggest asshole, jock that ever walked this earth. He genuinely thought he owned the place and that every girl would give their left arm for him, how wrong that was.

I mechanically turned around to face him and he wasn’t alone. He had two other guys with him, as they all tossed a football back and forth between him. From a distance Josh was a very good looking guy, had the striking features, perfect hair and build, but when he would come closer the menace in his eyes was dangerous, he reminded me of Gary.

I squared up to him, and put a blank expression on my face, that was surrounded with a calm facade. Inside, I was anything but calm. I was absolutely terrified.

“Now, what would Maggie be doing at our football field?” He asked to no one in particular, one of the guys with him laughed at his sarcasm, while the other guy stood there sceptical. I glanced at him and he gave me a slight shake of his head, telling me to watch what I