Once I come back to my senses, I spot Andrew in front of me grinning. You could say he also had an orgasm, even if he didn't. He is for sure very satisfied with his task.

"I'll keep this," he said showing me the vibrator.

"It is, in fact really useful."

I start to feel self-conscious again, I'm on a bed, naked, in front of Andrew, who just had given me my first orgasm. Hope he doesn't realize it was my first.

"Have you done this before?"

I shift fastly to gaze at him, how does he know? has he heard my thoughts?

"Ah, of course," I replied, the hesitancy in my voice is detectable.

"Oh", I sense the disappointment in his. Really?

"So, someone else had already used the vibrator on you?"

"Oh that, no, not that. That's pretty new," I react clumsily. He seems to be very pleased now with my statement.

"Good, it was a first for me as well." He said getting up and directing to the bathroom.

"I really enjoyed the challenge, though", he completes winking at me before getting inside the bathroom.

I watch him disappear. What should I do now, should I sneak out? I have never done this before. I don't even know how to look at him.

He is the first guy I have any sexual relations with after Brandon. However, Brandon was my boyfriend, it was pretty clear the procedure: Sex, cuddle, and sleep. What should I do when I do it with a stranger?

Especially when, in fact, we even didn't do it, he used my vibrator on me.

Fuck, he used my vibrator on me!

He watched me during every move. That's so embarrassing. He didn't even get anything from it.

No Kelsey don't forget how he has manipulated you to obtain the response he wanted. He got everything from it!

Ok, I'm taking too much time overthinking, he will soon come out of the bathroom and I will have to face him.

I chose the sneak out alternative, not that I felt I had another.

I quickly caught my clothes from the floor and in record time I was wearing them again. And just as I was leading to the door, ready to leave, Andrew comes from the bathroom.

"I didn't think you would be the type who sneaks out Kelsey," he pronounced, tilting his head. For some weird reason, his accent is stronger.

I turn to him, probably as red as I could be.

"I just have somewhere to go."

"Yeah, I'm sure you do. You for sure need to be there really fast. There is no other reason why you would be wearing your shirt on the wrong side."

Shit, I was not expecting I would get caught.

"Maybe you could wait at least five minutes before running away? I was hoping we could talk; you know after what we have done."

He said sitting on the bed, he is now wearing his brief.

"Ok," I reply sitting on the bed but not too close to him. What is there to discuss?

"As you remember well, you had agreed on having a fling with me." He states.

"Did I?" Really, I couldn't be more uncomfortable.

"Yeah, at the same time you were screaming your lungs out of pleasure. Do I need to remind you how it was?"

"No, it is ok, I just remembered now," I replied scratching the back of my neck.

Yeah, it could be more uncomfortable.

"Good, so how do you want to do this?"

"I'm not sure, I have never done what you call this before."

"When can we see each other? I'm living with your brother, so it makes things kind of difficult."

"Uhm", I reasoned about what he has asked before responding, "well Dani has classes Thursday nights. So, it is a possibility."

"Perfect, I will be there Thursday at 8 pm. Do you like Chinese food?"

"Yeah, I love it."

"Good I will bring it then."

"Ok, it is a dat- oh, I didn't mean that way, it is schedule then," yep I still can make it more awkward. I get up preparing myself to leave.

He laughs at my misused words.

"Perfect, I hope you will be prepared, Kelsey. Cause what I showed you today is not even close to what I would do to you."

I breathe heavily with his words and leave my old room heading directly back home after our talk.

I'm feeling a bit lost.

I would never believe if someone had told me one day a guy would make me cum using my vibrator. It is so embarrassing.

It is a thin tiny line between being sexy and weird. That was the creepiest and most exciting experience I have ever had.

I haven't realized I stood in the entrance of the apartment while I was pondering, awakening when Dani speaks:

"Hey you are ba-", she looks at me deeply.

"Ohhh you had sex!" She completed clapping her hands.

Does she have a crystal ball? Or do I smell like sex?

"Kind of, how did you know?"

She chuckles, "Kels you are wearing your shirt on the opposite side."

"Oh." That again.

"So, tell me, that boy finally shows what he is capable of?"

"Yeah, he showed me alright."

She has her mouth open now; her eyes are shining.

"Come on," she tells me pushing me to the couch, "tell me everything."

"Let's say we kill two birds with one stone."

"Oh Kelsey, just tell me everything without using your analogies please!"

I give her an annoyed glance.

"Fine, he gives me an orgasm using my vibrator."

"YESS!" She screams excitedly, and if I had heard it from another room, I would think she is having sex.

"Ops sorry, so you had your first orgasm Kels, we have to celebrate this, you have passed the ritual to the womanhood!"

We decided to go out and have some drinks. The night is pretty, it is getting warmer each day.

The bar is full of young and happy people, I could also say, drunk people.

We succeed to pick a table and Dani orders us some shots.

"Ok so tell me more about it. How was it?"

"It was good and weird," I said ruminating.

"I honestly thought you would be more excited after having your first orgasm. I guess it has different effects on different people," she said seeming disappointed.

"No, I mean it was very good, amazing. But he is such a jerk, I don't know why I'm doing this."

"Uhm for the orgasms?"

"Yeah, you are right."

"Do you regret it?"

"No, I don't, it was amazing," I respond honestly, how could I regret it? If it wasn't for him, I still wouldn't know what an orgasm is.

"Well so continue enjoying while you are appreciating it." She said taking one shot.

"It is just he is so smug; It is unbelievable. I was afraid I could maybe fall in love having a fling with him, but no. Now I'm afraid I will be repulsed by him."

She laughs

"You know how Charles likes to experience with food, and I like to experience with psychology?"

"Yes?"

"Well, you can do the same with Andrew, or with sex," she said winking.

I think I will see how it goes this Thursday. I can't believe he has manipulated me to continue this. Should I laugh or be angry? I don't even know.

We continued our celebration; it is true that after an orgasm I felt so relaxed. Once I forgot how awkward it was of course.

"Uhm, ok don't turn around to look right now, but I see Brandon is here with some friends."

"He is?"

"Yeah, how is the situation between you two?"

"There is no situation, we haven't spoken since we have broken up, we barely saw each other."

I succeed to avoid him each time during classes with the same strategy, arriving almost late to my class and sitting in front, usually with Steve.

"Do you think he saw us?" I'm starting to be nervous.

Ok, I'm a chicken, I don't know how to face Andrew after my orgasm, and I don't know how to face Brandon after we have broken up. Chicken Trophy for me.

"No, he has a focus on whatever they are talking about, don't worry."

We continued our conversation until we decide to leave.

"Kels, Brandon is close to the entrance, there is no way to avoid him leaving."

"So, maybe we can wait for them to leave?" As I said before: Chicken!

"Seriously? Kelsey, you have to take control of the situation."

I take a deep breath and we leave our table, as I turn, I spot Brandon directly, he is laughing about something his friend said.

I have again two options here: I ignore him, as I intend to do with Andrew today and I failed 'graciously', or I can greet him.

I decide to be the big girl, taking control of the situation, and acknowledging him. When he turns himself to me, I say 'Hi' smiling.

He doesn't reply, he keeps his mouth open staring at me as he is seeing a ghost. Ok, not what I was expecting. Maybe he started to be used to my 'ignoring him' behavior.

We leave the bar and head home.

The equation: Orgasm + alcohol + meeting your ex = exhaustion, with no other viable solution.

I fall asleep seconds after I have laid on my bed.

Sunday

My head keeps spinning between Andrew and Brandon, how did I jump from one relationship to another so alike?

Or it is spinning because of alcohol?

Monday

One of my teachers decided to do a surprise test.

Let me tell you, it was indeed a surprise.

Tuesday

I decide to continue with the big girl's behavior through Brandon greeting him from afar.

I still sit with Steve though. Come on, I'm not a bigger girl than that.

Wednesday

The apices of my day were knowing Dani will have a date tonight. A date.

I had dinner with Charles, in his apartment. Andrew was not there. It seems he was working until late.

Was he? I couldn't stop considering he could be avoiding me.

I would if I were him.

Thursday

I feel so much at ease now knowing I will see Brandon in my class, stop avoiding him was the best decision for sure.

I haven't heard a thing about Andrew though, during this entire week. I don't even know if we will still meet tonight.

I kept myself busy after class but decide to take a shower and prepare myself just in case.

At 20h sharp my doorbell rings.

I'm greeted by a smiling breath-taking Andrew, holding bags containing food in his hands.

"Hey, I brought Chinese as I promised. Even if it is not what I'm eager to taste tonight."

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