A Rebound?

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"Why?" Catalina waggled her eyebrows. "You say you're not pining for Mr. Assclown, so why not take a trip down memory lane and have some fun on the road to bone town?"

I couldn't help but laugh. She was always so crude. And hilarious. I shrugged. "I'm afraid."

"I know you don't want to get your heart broken again, but maybe this could be a Netflix and Chill kind of thing with Leo. Casual. Temporary. Upfront. A rebound."

I shook my head, thinking of how we'd tried to watch movies five years ago but ended up alternately laughing like crazy and doing a hell of a lot more. I thought of how my body had reacted to him on the beach. Then I thought of—

"No, I'm afraid I won't be able to... you know, do it with him."

Catalina frowned. "What are you talking about? I'm not following."

I swallowed. "I never told you this, but I had problems with Jacob. Like, big problems."

My friend looked surprised. "Problems?"

"I never really did it with Jacob. We tried lots, but it...hurt. He couldn't get it in. And not because he was too big or anything." A wave of shame washed over me as Catalina eyed me in horror.

I buried my face in my hands, and mumbled, "I talked to my doctor about it during my annual exam. She called it situational vagi...vagini—so embarrassing. I can barely pronounce it. Vaginismus. Ugh."

Catalina was wide-eyed with concern. "Jesus, are you okay? Do you need surgery?"

I lifted my head. "No, it's nothing like that. My doctor gave me exercises to do. Basically those...God, this is awful. I've never told anyone. The muscles down there close up shop."

Catalina tilted her head. "Whoa. That sucks. What about tampons?"

"I'm fine with tampons."

"I don't get it then. This didn't happen with Leo, did it?"

I shook my head miserably. "That's why my doctor called it 'situational.' It's possible it will only happen with Jacob. She's not sure."

Catalina snorted and rolled her eyes. "Maybe your vagina knew something your brain didn't."

That made me laugh—hard. "Maybe. My doctor said it can happen with stress. But what if I try with Leo and it happens again? I don't think I can handle that. Not right now. And it's not like I can tell him."

"Right. You can't just go out to coffee after not seeing him for five years and be like, 'By the way, my vagina sometimes malfunctions.' Even I know that would be inappropriate."

That made me laugh more.

Catalina sighed and gave a toss of her straight hair. "Oh, Jess. God. You've had such a shitty time of it recently, just relax and see what happens. Remember how really patient Leo was with you?" She grinned wickedly. "I was so fucking jealous. He really liked your body and...um, touching you and stuff before you actually had sex."

I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help smiling in return. Leo had loved my body, even if I hadn't, and that vacation, we had messed around for days before actually having sex. By the time we got around to the main event, we'd already explored every inch of each other. It made me shiver just to remember.

Usually, I tried not to remember.

Catalina drained her coffee with a loud slurp. "But what the hell am I saying? My first love also dumped me, and I haven't had any luck in New York either. Men suck. Forget my advice."

I shook my head. "You and Diego had a real relationship, though. Not just a two-week sex fest that ended in flames. He didn't use you. He didn't screw you then ghost you."

"No. But my heart was broken."

I made a strangled noise in the back of my throat, then laughed. "We're a pretty sad pair, right? I'm sorry. The last thing I wanted was to remind you of Diego. Not after all you went through. Especially not while you're here on vacation."

Catalina took a deep breath. "Look, I can't stay. My parents are taking my brother and me to Fort Myers for dinner. I just dropped by to say hi, but what are you doing tomorrow night?"

"Happy hour for business owners at The Sloppy Iguana. I should be there because I'm on the Chamber of Commerce committee for the seashell festival."

"You're becoming a real community leader. Look at you. I'm proud."

"Right. Whatever. I'm just following in Mom's footsteps. Come with me? Please? We can catch up more. I miss you."

"Come?" Catalina made a gagging noise. "Will anyone from high school be there?"

"No. Don't worry about running into anyone." I paused. "Besides, even if we did, no one will remember—"

"That I was the naked girl in the pictures on Diego's phone? Right. Whatever. The whole island knows about that. Hell, I got a funny look from the clerk at the gas station this morning. But I need to let it go, I guess. That or never come back."

"Yeah, you do need to let it go. You're a successful media executive in New York."

"Hardly. I'm a low-level social media whore at a content farm."

Catalina stood up, and I followed. We hugged, and I inhaled my friend's scent.

"Love you," I said, taking another inhale. "You smell spicy but weird. In a good way. Like cinnamon and...pepper?"

"Thanks. New perfume. I love you too, Jess."

____

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