Overcoming their fears

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Johnny was sitting on his bed, pondering if he should go out to get alcohol or just lie down and call it a day. The lingering feeling of worrying sick about Penny was hard to shake off. He was also brooding. Because once again, he was feeling like shit. « No fire, no smoke » would his father say.

The knock on the door startled him and he quickly made his way towards the door, fearing more bad news about his best friend. He opened the door and was surprised to find Baby there. The feeling of relief quickly gave way to confusion. He couldn't understand why his heart would always skip a beat when he saw her...
- May I come in? She asked softly.
He pushed the door with an arm and gave way for her to enter his room, showing her in without uttering a word.

She entered and took the room in. Only then did he realized the mess that reigned everywhere. Clothes carelessly dropped on chairs, his bed undone, empty coke bottles scattered around... Himself, without a shirt on.
- I-uh, I guess it's not a great room you probable got a great room... he apologized.
- No, it's a great room! she assured.
She sounded impressed, and once again he was amazed at how she seemed to appreciate the little things around her. She was a rich girl and she thought his shitty room was « great »... He remembered his manners and invited her to sit with a hand gesture. He went to stop the disc player, where one of his favorite song was spinning.
- No, leave it on, she urged.
They sat down to Otis Redding's lament.

These arms of mine, they are lonely
Lonely and feeling blue
These arms of mine, they are yearning
Yearning from wanting you
And if you would let them hold you
Oh, how grateful I will be

- I am sorry about the way my father treated you, Baby started.

- Your father was great, he cut her off, the way he looked after Penny, I mean-
- Yes, but I mean the way he was with you, she insisted. It really me it has to do with...

He glanced at her feeling a sinking sensation. So that's why she was here. It made sense. It was just like her to try and make it up for the underdog. But her father was a great man, and she had nothing to be ashamed of. If anyone should feel bad, really...

- Johnny I came here, because my father-
- The way he saved her... I mean... I could never do anything like this, that was something. The reason why people keep treating me like I'm nothing is because I'm nothing...
- That's not true! You? You're everything! she protested.
- You don't understand the way it is. At least for somebody like me! Last month, I'm eating jujubes to keep alive, and this month, women are stuffing diamonds in my pockets. I'm balancing on shit. As quick as that - he snapped his fingers- I could be down there again!
- No that's not the way it is! It doesn't have to be that way!
He looked at her in disbelief, a chuckle quickly dying in his throat. This girl. She had such a way of seeing the world. A profound optimism. An ingrained goodness. The trust that everything was possible. She was unique.

He would call her naive - and he had - but she proved before that she was capable of making good things happen exactly how she thought they should. In a way, she impressed him even more than her father.

- I've never known nobody like you, you look at the world and you know you can make it better.

He knew he sounded harsher than he meant, almost reproachful, but he couldn't help it. He couldn't refrain his frustration, because she couldn't understand. Life for him was different.
He went on:
- Somebody's lost, you find them. Somebody bleeds , and you-
- I go get my daddy. It's really brave. Like you said...
- That took a lot of guts to go to him! You are not scared of anything!

He stood up and started pacing.

- Me? I'm scared of everything! I'm scared of what I saw, I'm scared of what I did, of who I am... And most of all, I'm scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life... the way I feel when I'm with you...

Wait, what?

Johnny took a deep intake of air, taking time to process what she just said. Hope was lurking, but a somber thought came up first to his mind. « You're just the prize of the month. Just like for these women »... He wanted to trust the beautiful brown eyes that were now looking up to him. So much. But he knew better. He was nothing. She was everything. Plus, her nickname was Baby for God's sake!
This could lead nowhere. She was way out of his league, and she would forget about him by the next month, while he would be left with his pride a bit more trampled, and his heart broken.

The disc changed on the turntable, shifting the atmosphere and getting him out of his internal turmoil as Solomon Burke's Cry To Me echoed in the room. He stood silent, in a statuesque pose almost, hands in his pockets.
She walked up to him, stopping at arm's length.

- Dance with me.

She requested softly, in a whisper.
- Why, Here?
- Here.

She took a small step forward, allowing him time to recreate the distance between them. If he wanted to. She got closer and laid her hands on his pecs, setting off hot waves through his whole upper body. Lord, she smelled so good. She was slightly hesitant in her touch, so different in her approach from all these women. It wasn't assurance that he would give in at her will. She was being brave. She was an enigma, really. So innocent and so sensuous. Ingenuous and sexy.

Hope made his heart leap again. He started swaying with her on the music rhythm.

When you're all alone in your lonely room
And there's nothing but the smell of her perfume
Don't you feel like crying?
Don't you feel like crying?
Don't you feel like crying?
C'mon, c'mon, cry to me

They danced, their body tuning together harmoniously, sensuality filling the room and their every muscles. He took her in his arms and danced like he had wanted to all these last days, watching her persevere in a struggle that wasn't even hers to begin with, exhausted and sweating, but never giving up... in outfits tinier by the day. If she knew how badly he wanted her then. But tonight she was in his arms. She was kissing his neck, getting more assured in her moves, showing him how much she wanted him too. So he danced with her, the sexiest dance he ever experienced. She circled him slowly and caressed his ass, and all his resolve was gone. He wouldn't be able to protect his heart from this girl. His Baby.

He took her blouse off and kissed her deeply, never interrupting their dance. He cupped her ass and pressed her pelvis on the hard bulge in his pants lifting one of her leg up to his side. She looked at him with fever in the eyes. He lowered his head to take a nipple in between his teeth, through the sheer fabric of her white bra. He remembered how erected these nipples were in the lake when they were practicing the lift. How badly he wanted her then. How badly he wanted her now. She moaned and he rubbed his jaw on her other breast, teasing her with his blond stubble, before lifting her up. She circled his waist with her legs, grinding against him. He brought her to the bed and took her pants off. He laid two fingers on her panties, feeling them warm and wet. He pushed the fabric away to lay his thumb on her clitoris and asked in a caress:
- Is it your first time?
She nodded once wordlessly, lips parted and swollen. She traced his lips with her fingers.
- I'll be gentle, love.

Whoa, nothing can be sadder than a glass of wine alone
Loneliness, loneliness, such a waste of time, whoa yeah
You don't ever have to walk alone, you see
Come take my hand, and baby, won't you walk with me?


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