Chapter 48

-The Awakening

              Note: This Chapter is about Amelia and James for those that want to skip anymore about her. 

It’s late and as usual James Monroe is home alone his wife’s whereabouts are unknown.  He sits in his study with an amber liquid and a few cubes of ice in a glass to his left and yet another large envelope filled with damning evidence of Amelia’s antics on his desk to his right.  Laying his head on his mahogany surface to rest he thinks about the meeting he had earlier tonight. 

She stopped him as he was leaving his building and asked him to go somewhere and have a drink with her.  He thought her quite beautiful and he was flattered that such an enchanting creature was hitting on him until he came to his senses.  He felt like an old fool. 

Raising his head from his desk his eyes linger on the amber liquid in the glass to the left of him.  He wants to take a drink of it bad.  When did he start drinking so much?  He can probably pin it down to gradually over the last thirteen years.  Thirteen years he has been married to the most hated and destructive woman he has had the misfortune to get in bed with and to keep. 

He kept all of her secrets, he’s kept her in a lifestyle she would never otherwise have if he weren’t so generous to her giving her an allowance that helped her terrorize and destroy people’s lives.  He is a fool and it’s the role he has been comfortable with for so many years because she gave to him the attention his first wife neglected to.  She understood he wanted to build an empire.  She told him the things he wanted to hear and helped him achieve the contracts he needed to get what he wanted.   

What he wanted was to be king of New York at any cost.  He wanted people to fear him, to look up to him.  He wanted his name on all of the new real estate in the city.  It would be his legacy, something he could pass on to his children and their children. 

Seeing Alexandra Hurst-Kerr for the first time in over two years and the strength she exuded after all that she has endured made him feel like his quest to be a king did just the opposite he felt low like less than a man.  

Her anger at him was justified, she blamed him for giving his wife the platform to spew her venom.  This woman spoke to him harshly, she didn’t care about his position and the fact that he said he could destroy her.  She told him things he didn’t want to hear she said he was an accomplice, culpable in Amelia’s duplicity, she told him he was a coward.  He looked the other way whenever his wife hurt someone.  She told him to go ahead and try to destroy her because there was nothing left to destroy.  His wife had already done it.  Taken away from her everything she loved then she gave him an envelope filled with a cell phone conversation he has now listened to several times and those dreaded pictures sitting to his right.  

Pictures of Amelia and Liam Sheffield going into their penthouse, to a bank and a car dealership.  The last picture he looks at is of Amelia and Liam Sheffield at a bar.  He knows what night it had to have been taken.  Amelia doesn’t wear the same outfit that often and certainly not in the same week.   

Shoving the envelope onto the floor he watches the cell phone and the pictures fall out he can’t stand to look at them.  He can’t face the thought that somehow he is responsible for his son upstairs in his room struggling to get back what he’s lost. 

Amelia’s thirst for destruction has finally hit home, his home and he could have stopped it long ago but he keeps choosing to hide inside a bottle of liquor instead. 

Alexandra didn’t want money or his forgiveness.  She simply asked him to ask himself why he allowed Amelia to stay in his life.  Is it really worth it to be king of a building empire in the greatest city at the expense of destroying so many lives including his own son’s?  

Amelia’s influence of others comes from extortion, fear and deceit.  He is a part of all of that through his association with her.  Alexandra explained to him that in her position as an attorney she has spent the last two years researching, investigating and looking for ways to take him and his family down.  She said she was prepared to do it.  She is sure with all of the people his wife has harmed she can find enough of them to destroy him and Amelia in a court of law but she wants Amelia to have a taste of what it feels like to hurt.   

Alexandra told him to free himself, to give his son a chance to recover and not suffer anymore with new memories.  As long as he keeps Amelia in his home, around his children and as a part of his life he will pay the price for her continued quest to control all that she sees and to destroy anyone that gets in her path including him.  She asked him to do something so simple it causes a cry of anguish to be released from his soul.  She told him to let Amelia go.  Stop being an enabler in her twisted world.   

Alexandra told him to take away from Amelia the things that she loves then she hit him where it really hurts by telling him Amelia doesn’t love him and she never has.  She doesn’t know how to love a person.  What she loves is to control, to manipulate and to maintain the lifestyle that he makes it possible for her to have.  She told him to take those things away from Amelia and let her pay for her sins, only he has the power to do it. 

That glass full of amber liquid sitting on his desk to the left of him.  He drinks it not to hide anymore but to give himself courage.  Getting up from his chair he walks out of the study through the house she decorated.  He stops walking in front of a piece of art that’s hanging on the wall.  He remembers the day it arrived.  He thought it ugly it didn’t fit with the decor of anything in the house.  She offered him a compromise they would hang it here in the hallway.  

That was six years ago and it now hits him how easy it was for her to manipulate him.  He remembers that years later they were having a dinner party when she told some of their guests that inquired about the picture she bought it especially to place on that wall in that spot.  She went on and on about the artist that created the picture convincing some of their mutual friends to purchase his art.  Later he learned that she was sleeping with the young artist and like all the things she did, he let it go.  That artist is now the owner of two galleries and taking his ugly art to other parts of the world to sell. 

James sneers at the picture as he looks up at it.  He grabs it yanking it from the walls banging it against another piece of furniture she convinced him to buy.  A hallway armoire that cost him more than ten thousand dollars.  She said she had to have it while they were on one of his business trips in Singapore.  It cost him thousands of dollars to have it shipped to the US and he’s never liked it either. 

Raking his fingers through his hair he climbs the stairs he’s shared with her for ten years of their thirteen year marriage.  He wanted another house but she wanted this one.  He gave in to her wishes and after she got the house decorated she lost interest in it.  She is hardly ever home, he spends more time in it than she ever has although he goes away from it to work every day. 

At the top of the stairs he starts to turn left to go to his son’s room but something stops him and he turns right walking quickly down the hallway as if the hounds of hell are after him.  He opens the door to Amelia’s room.  They haven’t shared a bed now for more than two years.  He really can’t pinpoint or recall when they stopped sleeping together it happened gradually over time as he learned of the men she was screwing and he had to pay out to prevent so many scandals.  She kept promising him that she wouldn’t do it again then she would remind him of how bad her childhood was and tell him what she had given up to be with him. 

She played him time and again telling him that her daughter hated her and wouldn’t speak to her because she left her for him.  Now that he knows Kara he knows that it isn’t true.  He is sorry for any pain he has caused Kara but he knows he isn’t responsible for the relationship that Amelia has with her daughter.  

He walks further into the room looking around it.  Her closet, she’s always in her closet.  He opens the doors walking in.  Queens don’t have a closet that is this magnificent.  It’s larger than his office downstairs and filled with rows and rows of clothing with new tags still on them.  Amelia is a woman that wants for nothing he is so good to her.    He’s standing next to a shelf of expensive designer bags and purses.  It pisses him off how many she has.  He knows all of the designer’s names he knows the cost.  She has an entire row of purses in rainbow colors to match several of her outfits.  Each bag cost him between five and ten thousand dollars.  He starts picking them up and throwing them.  They land against her wall of expensive shoes knocking some of them on the floor. 

His anger isn’t satisfied he grabs an armful of her clothes from the racks and drags them out into the bedroom throwing them on the bed.  He goes back and grabs another armful and some shoes and boots adding them to the pile.  He goes back in looking around searching for a suitcase.  Her entire set of Louis Vuitton luggage is stacked neatly against the wall.   Barrowing through it grabbing a large suitcase he takes it into the bedroom and opens it up.  He starts shoving some of the clothes on the bed into it some shoes, a pair of boots.  He tries to close it as best he can giving up grabbing the whole thing he rushes from the room and throws it over the bannisters. 

As James sobers up and stands there staring at the fallen suitcase that hit the hall table on the bottom floor knocking over the mirror hanging above it broken glass scatters everywhere mixed in with the clothes and shoes that fell out of the broken suitcase.  It feels good to do what he just did but it’s not enough.  That pile lying on the floor sums up his marriage to Amelia its one big expensive mess.   

A harrowing cry from his son’s room breaks him from his raging spell.  He hurries down the hallway to the wing of the house where Maxim is supposed to be sleeping. 

He enters the room to find his son sitting up in bed screaming and holding his arms up trying to avoid what is coming at him.  James knows he’s remembering the crash.  He’s been this way since he came home.  Each time he falls into a deep sleep it’s the only memory of his life he has and it’s a nightmare. 

Rushing to his son’s bed he sits next to him gathering him in his arms he rocks him back and forth.  Maxim is crying out to be saved, James starts to cry as he holds him.  What can he do, he doesn’t know how to resolve this. 

“Dad….?”  He hears in his despair.  Maxim touches his face feeling the wetness on his father’s cheeks. 

“What’s wrong dad?”  Maxim whispers feeling his hand across his father’s tear stained face.

 “Maxim…..Max you remember me?”  James raises his son’s head cupping his face in his hands. 

“I lost Alexandra to him again dad.  She’s gone, you were right dad, it’s time for me to move on.”  Maxim says as if everything that’s happened the last few weeks didn’t happen.  His mind has picked up where it left off. 

“Why are you crying dad?  It’s going to be okay.  It hurts but I’ll get over it.”  Maxim keeps talking to his father. 

“Maxim, do you know what day it is?  Do you remember what happened to you?”  James holds his son by the shoulders. 

“Yeah dad, I just got home.  I had another fight with Lester.  I know you told me to stay away from him and I’m sorry.  We fought over Alexandra.  I can’t do it anymore dad.  I need to go away for a while to get away from them.  I don’t want to see her around him right now.  You think I can go back to Vegas for a while?”  Maxim ask he doesn’t remember he was in a car accident and has lost his memory.  He’s talking to his father as if he just came on that horrible night. 

“Max….son can you tell me about what happened to you at the restaurant.  Did you go there to meet with Alexandra?”  James wants to know. 

“No dad…..I’m sorry.  I was spying on Amelia and Logan.  I thought she was playing around on you again and I followed them there.  They were having dinner together.  I was sitting at the bar when I saw Alexandra in the backroom.  The owner wanted to sell his restaurant and she was there as his attorney going over his books.  I tried to talk to her but she didn’t want to listen to me.  I know you told me to let it go and I tried dad….I really tried but when I saw her, Lester showed up and we got into a fight and then….and then….”  Maxim lays back against the pillows and holds his hand over his eyes.  He starts to cry. 

James squeezes his arm and lets him get it all out.  “I’m sorry dad.”  Maxim says through his tears. 

“Max….don’t say that your sorry to me again.  Listen to me.  It’s me that’s sorry.  I’m sorry that I didn’t listen to you like I should have.  I haven’t done a lot of things that I should.  I’m sorry that I haven’t been a better father to you.  Don’t talk anymore everything is going to be alright.  Just rest.”  James sighs heavily. 

The sound of high heels clicking across the kitchen floor is loud and annoying.  Amelia walks through the kitchen having parked her car in the garage and come into the house through the mudroom where she hangs up her coat.  Grabbing her purse from a counter she walks down the hallway past James office without so much as looking in it to see if he’s there.  She makes a turn to walk further down the hall then stops. 

The picture on the wall is smashed over the expensive armoire they purchased together on one of his business trips.  She walks hastily back to his home office the door is open she peeks inside not wanting him to see her, he’s not there but she sees pictures scattered on the floor and a large envelope.  Hurrying into the room she picks up one of the pictures off the desk.  It’s a picture of her and Liam Sheffield at the bar of the restaurant on that night.  “He knows.”  She says aloud while closing her eyes trying to think. 

She doesn’t know where he is or if he is still in the house.  She doesn’t look at any of the other damning pictures she’s sure it’s all there.  She has so many enemies she doesn’t have time to figure out which one of them did this.  She’s already formed a story in her head to tell him.  

Hurrying from his office into the hallway she finds a single shoe lying in the middle of the floor then a blouse, another shoe, a boot until she sees the broken mirror pieces strewn everywhere.  There’s another hallway chest filled with broken glass and clothes thrown on top of it.  Turning toward the stairway she sees the suitcase full of her clothes some with buyer’s tags still on them.  Looking up there’s a pair of pants hanging from the bannister. 

Amelia climbs the stairs tentatively she doesn’t know what she will find when she gets to the top of them she’s feeling anxious.  The things she’s done behind her husband’s back in the last few months start to flash before her eyes.  Her mind is spinning she doesn’t know how much he knows and to what extent.  If she can just get to her room to get to her bag stashed in the back of her closet that holds her passports and money she keeps hidden away.  She can lay low for a while then try to smooth things over between her and James, he’s always forgiven her before.   

Maxim survived the accident, he will eventually recover and all will be well she tells herself but she’s not so confident this time. 

At the top of the stairs she looks down the hallway toward Maxim’s wing.  It’s quiet.  She takes off her shoes to walk barefoot down the other side trying to be as quiet as she can until she reaches her room.  She gets within sight of it.  Its door is cracked open.  Just as her hand wraps around the doorknob and she opens it all the way seeing her closet full of beautiful clothes thrown haphazardly across the bed she hears his voice.   

Turning around he’s coming at her with a rage in his eyes and full of determination like she’s never seen before.  She runs taking off down the back stairway ending up in the kitchen.  She has her shoes in her hands but she doesn’t have her purse or keys to her car she remembers setting her purse down on a nearby chair when she first found her shoe. 

Quickly she makes her way through the kitchen following the same path she took earlier past his office.  She can hear him angrily yelling her name he’s looking for her.  She makes it to the spot where her purse is.  Picking it up she has to put on her shoes before running through all of the broken mirror pieces on the floor.   

She’s almost at the front door.  Her hand is reached out it barely touches the front doorknob when he catches her.  She tries to yank away from him but he has a firm grip on her arms. 

“Let me go James.”  She screams at him trying to pry herself free. 

“Let you go Amelia, for what so you can destroy someone else’s life, so you can go out and fuck another man behind my back then come back to my bed thinking I will forgive you.”  James yells in her face as he squeezes her arms tighter shaking and hurting her. 

She’s never seen him this angry before.  He’s never put his hands on her she’s terrified of him.  Amelia reverts to thinking the way she did when she was a little girl and the men would come into her room when her mother was asleep.  She learned if she just gave them what they wanted they wouldn’t hurt her, they only wanted her body.  She learned to shut down her emotions, to control her fears letting them have their way with her. 

“James…..please, please what do you want.  Let’s just go upstairs to your room.  I can make you happy.  I can make all the pain go away.  You want that don’t you baby.  You…you want that….yeah, that’s right.  James you want me, I’m yours, only yours….please let’s just go upstairs and go to bed darling.  Ev…everything will be different in the morning.”  Her brow is wet, her hair is matted to her head from her sweat.  She’s shaking all over.  Her hand is caressing his cheek. 

James rage suddenly dissipates as he stares into her beautiful green eyes that seem to be filled with what he can only describe as a strange lustful filled type of fear.  She uses sex to control, it’s how she used him and got him to marry her.   He lets her arms go but he backs her against the wall holding his hand around her throat. 

“I don’t want your body Amelia.  I’ve had you darling for years and you aren’t that satisfying.  You have no soul, there’s nothingness where your heart should be.  You don’t know how to make love to a man Amelia what you do is draining.  Having sex with you is just an act.  You give nothing of yourself in the process.”  He says dryly as if bored with her.  It feels like a slap in the face to Amelia. 

He sniffles his eyes filling with tears and so are Amelia’s as she trembles and sweats in his grasp.  “I thought all these years if I loved you unconditionally it would be enough and you would learn how to love but it wasn’t meant to be.  You’re a sick and twisted creature that no one would morn if I were to snap your beautiful throat.  I can no longer stand the sight of you Mellie.  I’m through trying to save you from yourself.  I guess I never really tried hard enough.  I was greedy and I used you to gain some of the things I needed but you knew that and you made me pay for it