Cyrus' POV

"Mom," I groaned, grabbing at her hand and trying to give off an aura of love and loyalty to my sweet mother. "We only started dating today! Nothing happened between us. But Theo has to keep sleeping over!"

"Absolutely not," she growled, turning on me with the full force of her mom glare. "How old is he anyway? He looks like he could be in his twenties! It's inappropriate for you to be hanging out with—"

Theo poked his head in the room, expression empty as usual. "I'd like to inform you that I can still hear you."

"Then go outside," Mom snapped, shoving her finger at the door.

"If you insist," Theo grumbled. "Although I will hear you there too, because my hearing is far superior to a humans'."

Mom sent me a distressed look. The second Theo was gone, she motioned at the door. "He's so odd! Cyrus, you need to explain yourself."

"He thinks he's a demon," I admitted. "He's got some kind of mental disorder," I lied. "He's also homeless," I lied again.

Mom blinked. "What?"

"That's why he needs this place to stay!" I cried. "There's nowhere else for him to go! Please, let him sleep in the basement or something!"

She rubbed in between her eyes and sighed. "If he's honestly homeless, I don't mind...but he really needs to look for another option. We can't be a long term solution, honey...I just don't have the funds for that."

I hugged her tight. "Thank you! I love you! I promise I'll make Theo a nice room in the basement and don't mind his demon talk! He's crazy."

Before I could go get him, she fixed her sharp gaze on me. "Cyrus, I need to have a talk with you. We've never talked about sex in detail, because it hasn't come up yet." Which was because I was a boyfriend-less, virginal loser. Thanks for reminding me, Mom. "But please, try to hold off. I know it's hard as a young man with needs—"

"Okay, Mom!"

"Listen to me! It is always best to tell a man no at first, so you learn his character," she explained, looking like this was something she really needed to get off her chest. "It's not playing coy or heard-to-get; it's a manipulative tactic that always works. You must refuse him at first to see how much he truly respects you."

I'd totally refused Theo. He'd totally respected me. My heart beat quicker.

"And then you know, for the future, his true character," she explained. "Don't give in to pressure. And if you do decide that is something you want, always feel like you can come to me for anything. I have advice, I have condoms—please use condoms! I don't think you should have sex, but I'd be happier to know that you're being safe than—"

"Okay, Mom!" I yelped, face getting hot. "Thanks for the advice! Theo and I haven't done any of that and don't plan to!"

She sighed. "Oh, good."

"I'm going to get him now!" I said, walking towards the door.

It swung open before I could even get close. Theo strolled in. "I heard you finish up. I promise, Ms. West, I will treat your son carefully. We will wait until he is comfortable, and then the experience will be pleasurable and painless."

I needed to go die in a hole somewhere.

Mom shook his hand hard. "You better treat him well. Or I'll fuck you up."

"Okay!" I grabbed Theo's shirt and tugged him away. "Good talk! We're going upstairs now!"

"Leave the door open!"

"Got it, Mom!"

We collapsed on the bed and I cuddled up against Theo's chest. "That was terrible," I groaned. "I really didn't want her knowing."

Theo wrapped a supportive arm around me, which quickened the beat of my heart. "It is sweet that she cares for you, despite your sexuality. I wish my father were more like that."

I kissed his shoulder and rested my head there. "I thought you told me that he's nice to you. Was he mean when you told him about your sexuality?"

Theo's gaze travelled to the wall, with the spells hidden underneath paint. "No, not mean. He has never been mean to me. He simply...didn't validify my feelings, I suppose. It wasn't a bad fight, but I was disproportionately angry."

"You have every right to be angry," I insisted. "He should've supported you one hundred percent."

Theo grinned and ruffled my hair, and I was yet again taken back by how handsome he looked when he was carefree. His smile made his eyes sparkle and a dimple formed in his cheek. A wave of affection warmed my chest.

"Thank you, my human," Theo said. "You're kind."

I smiled a little, and Theo smiled a little, and then we were kissing. Theo's hand came up to cup my jaw and I tossed my leg in between his.

"Ew! Mom, Cyrus is making out with the weirdo!" Nina screamed. "Make it stop, please!"

I grabbed a pillow and launched out of bed, running at her. Nina screeched and I chased her into her room, where I smashed the shit out of her with a pillow. "You!" Smack. "Are!" Smack. "Not!" Smack. "A good!" Smack. "Sister!" Smack.

I looked back to see Theo standing in the doorway, giving us a quizzical look. "Is this the sparring of the land of the living? If so, there is very little bloodshed."

Nina sat up and glared at him. "No, weirdo, that's MMA fighting. For a weirdo who's bend on world domination, you sure don't know a lot about this world."

"I don't know," I mused. "I would've said fencing."

"Get out of here," Nina growled, holding up her cellphone like it was a weapon. I guess, for fourteen year old girls, it kind of was.

I grabbed Theo's hand and we headed out of her room. I was glad Mom didn't seem to here her annoying yelling.

"We should make a place of rest for me in your basement," Theo stated darkly. "Which will hopefully be more comfortable than the blankets on your floor. And then, after we've done that, we might as well start making plans for world domination."

I grimaced, suddenly remembering that the super hot guy I was into was the Antichrist who wanted to set fire to the streets and become the new Messiah.

My headache came back.

-

Thank you everyone for reading this crazy story! It's not even close to over or anything, I just wanted to say thanks :)