39 | Stay

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Warning:
Mature scenes ahead

***

Once we get inside my house, I storm into my room, Vaughn trailing behind me. He grabs my arm and whirls me around.

"Let go of me," I say firmly, pulling my arm away from him. "Why are you doing this to me, Vaughn? Why didn't you just leave me if we can't be together again? Why are you still here?"

His jaw tightens as he watches me, pain reflecting in his eyes. "Because I can't leave you. I don't want to."

I stare at him in disbelief. "But you pretended like I didn't even exist." I hate that my voice sounds so broken and how shaking it is, but there's nothing I can do about that. "Did you know how I feel every time I waited for you to come home? I was so worried about you, I couldn't even sleep until you came back. Even though when you did, you didn't even want to look at me." Now my sobs break. I can't hold it anymore.

"You are hiding something from me, and I know what it is," I continue. "I know you still love her. You're looking for her. I can see it in your eyes, Vaughn. How desperate you are to find her. How angry you are that you can't find her." A tear falls to my cheek, followed by another. And another. I just let it go. All the feelings I've been burying deep down in my heart are now poured out.

Vaughn stares at me as if he's in the same pain. But he doesn't say any word, still listening to me.

"I already sensed it even before I decided to be with you, Vaughn. But then--" I choke in tears. "You made me feel like I was wrong. Like we were real. Like you loved me too."

He looks into my eyes, and my breath catches in my throat as I see the sadness in his eyes. I've never seen him so vulnerable. He opens his arms, as if asking me to run into him now. "Come here," he whispers.

Another sob breaks from me, and I turn around instead. I choose not to look at him, because I'm afraid that it will make me fall again. Deeper.

But then, I feel his warmth seep through my skin as he hugs me from behind, wrapping his arms around my waist and placing his cheek close to mine. "On that, you are wrong, Melanie," he says, his voice so soft in my ear. His hand reaches the pearl necklace on my neck that I've always worn since he gave it to me. "I meant what I said when I gave you this. You are my present. You are my future. You are my strength, Mel. You've always been so. I always know that I can get through this, with you by my side." He plasters a soft kiss on my cheek, and my body shudders.

"Look at me," he begs, but I don't budge, afraid to do so. "Goddammit, Mel. Just look at me." Now, his voice is barely a whisper.

Slowly, he turns me around to face him, and my heart freezes in place when I see that his eyes are glistening with tears.

"What do you see?" he rasps. "Do you still think that my feelings for you aren't real? That I don't love you?" His voice is shaking.

I shake my head, my lips trembling. There is only truth and honesty that I find in those broken ambers.

"I love you, Mel," he says the three words, and my heart feels like it's about to explode out of my chest. "I'm not losing you." His voice is firm as he says the last sentence, like he wouldn't allow me to run away from him.

How can a man so strong beg me not to leave him?

I always know that his eyes, his words and his touches would be the death of me. But there's nowhere else I'd rather be than here, in his arms. More tears fill my eyes as I see the man I love coming back to me. Is this real? Or is it just a dream?

I'm still finding it hard to respond to his words, so I utter the thing that suddenly crosses my mind, "Jake will kill you."

He stares at me, as if absorbing my words. "Not if I kill him first," he says, sounding so determined that I wonder whether he would just do that in order to be with me.

Then he brushes his lips against mine and kisses me slowly while holding me close to him. I respond to his kiss with all my heart, and I'm sure that he can taste my tears as he kisses my lips. For once, I don't give a damn about the world -- mine revolves only around him now.

"God, I missed you," he whispers between our kisses, and I welcome his tongue as he shoves it into my mouth. I miss his kisses so much. I miss everything about my Vaughn. My hand gets under his shirt and is now touching his bare chest, making a deep growl escape his mouth.

He stops kissing me and lay me down onto the bed while locking his gaze with mine.

Those amber eyes... How can they hold so many emotions inside? Emotions so strong that I barely can keep looking at them. How can his love feel so real now compared to the past few days?

Slowly, Vaughn unbuttons my shirt before taking off my pants and underwear until I'm completely naked, on the bed, before him. Then he undresses too and put the condom that he always kept inside the back pocket of his jeans. Staring at me, he leans over me until we're face to face, while his fingers reach my slit, making me gasp. He shoves one into my slick opening, which is already wet, as usual, ready for him.

While his face leans closer to mine, he doesn't break our eye contact. "Melanie," he whispers. There is so much passion in his voice, making my heart thump harder. "I told you that I won't give your heart back, because it is mine."

And with that, he thrusts fully into me, making my body jerk upward. It feels so good that I feel a single tear sliding down my cheek. He can't wait to be one with me again, just like what I'm feeling. My longing and desire for him for this past week are now fulfilled.

He continues his thrusts, but it's not like those lustful and bold sexes he used to give me before -- although I never complained about those either. Tonight, it's different. It's so intense. His thrusts are slow. But each is deep, just like the depth of love in his eyes that I'm witnessing. I wrap my arms around his back and moan in pleasure every time he reaches me to the core.

"It's always been you, Mel," he rasps, sweat trickling from his forehead as he continues filling me. "It's you. Only you."

We are one. At this moment, I feel like nothing can separate us anymore. Nothing can tear us apart.

Another tear slides down my cheek. I feel whole. With him. By my side.

And my helpless moans continue to echo inside the room as we go on making love.

The sound of birds chirping in my ear and rays of sunlight on my face wake me up. My eyelids flicker before I can fully open my eyes. I see the familiar ceiling of my room, but strangely, the plain white woods look more beautiful now. Everything around me seems more beautiful, because nothing can top what I'm feeling inside.

A soft smile touches my lips as I cover my eyes with my hand, sighing. I turn on my side to face the person who has just made me the happiest girl in the world again, who wrapped me in his embrace before we went to sleep last night.

"Vaughn--" But my words stick in my throat as I see the bed beside me empty. I reach out to touch it. It's cold.

My mind seems to stop. And my heart sinks, so low, to the bottom of an endless pit.

He's gone.


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