"So, how'd you like it?" Madison asks me as she presses pause on the ending credits of Clueless.

"It was good." I smile. "Definitely one of my favorites now. Even though I do find it a little weird she ended up with her ex-step brother... anyways— it was good."

Madison laughs, nodding her head in agreement. Vanessa looks up from her phone from where she sits on Madison's bed. She hardly watched the movie, but I'm sure it's only because she's seen a countless amount of times.

"We should shop for our costumes tomorrow," Madison suggests. "I think we can find outfits for Dionne and Tai at the mall. I don't know if they'll have the yellow plaid look for Cher, though."

"I already ordered the outfit," Vanessa says. "It's coming Tuesday. I'll still go to the mall with you guys, though."

I reach for a handful of popcorn from the bowl in front of me. "Oh, I won't be able to go to the mall tomorrow."

Vanessa lifts her eyes from her phone screen to look at me. "Why not?"

"I have to finish the project for History," I explain after chewing my popcorn.

She nods slowly, moving from her position against the headboard to scoot forward, closer to me. Something tells me she's now interested in the conversation based on the way she leans forward, crossing her legs.

"Who are you working with?" She asks.

My eyebrows furrow slightly. They both look at me expectantly. I can feel Madison's burning gaze from beside me.

"Aaron."

"Are you guys like... together or something?" Vanessa pries, casually grabbing a licorice from the large plastic bin on the table. Taking a bite, she adds, "You two seem to spend a lot of time together."

"No, we're just friends."

"What about Jacob?" She asks.

Jacob?

"What about him?" I counter, my voice laced with confusion.

"He likes you," Madison chimes in. "He told us the other day. I thought you knew that, though."

I shake my head. I can only recall having handful of conversations with Jacob. Out of those very few awkward encounters, none of them has ever gone much deeper than the average small-talk between strangers.

"I don't even really know him," I admit.

"Well maybe you should get to know him," Vanessa suggests. "He's cute, he's nice. And he's interested in you."

Is he? Cute and nice?

She smiles, her shoulders doing a little shimmy as she speaks about Jacob.

"Uh... I don't know." I laugh, shifting from my position uncomfortably.

I'll admit it. Vanessa intimidates me. She's friendly, but sometimes I can't help but feel like she has some secret negative feelings toward me. Maybe she doesn't and I'm overthinking. But sometimes her tone conveys different emotions than her words do.

"Are you going to the Halloween party next Friday?" Madison asks me. "Jacob will be there."

"I don't know," I reply, not wanting anything to do with the football jock.

"You should come with us," Vanessa says, nodding her head. "We can all walk in together like in our costumes. You know, Cher, Dionne, and Tai."

"And we can set something up for you and Jacob to have some alone time," Madison adds, wiggling her eyebrows.

I don't want alone time with Jacob.

I give them a weak smile. I'm still rubbish on how to react in these types of situations. Discomfort is all I'm feeling right now, but I can't let them in on that.

"Where's your bathroom?" I ask Madison.

"Down the hall, last door on the right," she replies, pointing to her bedroom door.

"Okay, be right back."

I discreetly grab my phone and walk out of her bedroom. I slowly open the last door of the hallway, making sure it is the bathroom. Once I'm sure it is, I turn the lights on and lock the door behind me.

That's enough social interaction for a day.

I decide to call one of the only people I can count on at a time like this. The line rings and rings. Pick up, Asher. No answer. After all, it is a Friday night and I don't for a second doubt that Asher's out, having better things to do than sit around his phone and pick up phone calls from an easily-overwhelmed girl he's known for a little over a month.

So I call the only other person I can think of. Chances are, he's just as busy as Asher is. I hesitate before clicking, shutting my eyes as I tap the phone icon underneath his name.

"Estella?" Aaron's voice slides into my ears after a few rings. "What's up?"

His tired voice takes me by surprise. "I'm sorry— were you sleeping?"

"No," he replies. "Wait— is this a booty call? Cause I mean, I'm flattered—"

"No." I stifle my laugh, shaking my head even though he can't see me.

"Is everything okay, Estella?"

"Are you— can you pick me up from Madison's house?" I finally blurt out, realizing the girls will start to wonder why I've been in the bathroom for so long.

"Right now?"

"Yes."

He hesitates for a second. "Send me the address."

I sigh in relief, releasing a breath I didn't even know I was holding. "Thank you so much."

"I'll text you when I'm there."

I nod. "Okay, I gotta go. Bye, Aaron."

I end the call, quickly sending him the address before re-entering Madison's room.

"I hope you sprayed the poopouri in there after you finished." Madison laughs as I walk in.

"What?" I ask. "Oh! No, I didn't."

"I'm just kidding, Estella." She shakes her head as she and Vanessa continue their laughing fit. "Gosh, you're funny."

They're laughing at you.

I grab my phone from the back pocket of my jeans, pretending it lit up with a text message. "My ride's actually here. I have to go."

"What?! Aw, it's barely 10:00," Madison says with a frown.

"Yeah." I shrug. "Well, thanks for inviting me. I had fun."

"We'll walk you out," Vanessa offers as she swings her legs off of the bed.

My eyes widen. "No, that's all right. I'll just see myself out."

"Okay," Madison responds. "Thanks for coming. We'll see you Monday? Or maybe Sunday we can go to the mall since you can't tomorrow."

I nod. "I'll let you know."

I grab my backpack from beside her door before walking out and shutting it behind me. As I make my way down the hall, I hear both girls' loud chortling coming from the bedroom.

They're still laughing at you.

Before I leave the house, I make sure to thank Madison's parents for having me. A rush of relief overcomes me the second I'm outside of her house.

I wish I were better equipped to handle situations where I get so overwhelmed I can hardly think. In reality, it wasn't much of a big deal at all. My mind simply can't handle talking about Jacob, having alone time with him at the party next week, or even the stupid bathroom situation Madison and Vanessa found out-of-this world funny.

I sit on the curb outside of Madison's house, grateful the window in her room doesn't have a view of the front lawn.

A few minutes later, a grey Chevy Malibu pulls in front of me at a low speed. Before I even stand up, he rolls the window down so I can see him.

"Why are you out here?" He asks.

"Nice breeze." I shrug as I stand up.

"Very funny."

I get inside, buckling my seatbelt as he drives off. I have a feeling he won't stop asking questions about why I was outside until I tell him the truth.

"Estella, what happened?" He asks as he drives away from Madison's house. "Did they do something?"

I shake my head. "No, I was just tired."

Cracking my fingers, I turn to the window, hoping he'll just let it go and believe that I definitely didn't freak out over something incredibly stupid.

"I'm sorry for bothering you this late," I mumble. "I tried calling Asher but—"

"It's okay," he interjects.

I bite the inside of my cheek, still facing the window. After a few minutes, I start recognizing the streets surrounding my house.

"Do you know how to drive?" He asks.

"No," I reply, embarrassed of the fact that I don't know the first thing about the skill. "I'm taking my permit test soon, though."

He slows the car as we near my house. He pulls into the driveway, turning off the ignition before slightly turning his torso to face me.

"Estella," he begins.

"Yeah?" I respond, looking down at my lap while I fiddle with my fingers. 

"Look at me," he asserts softly.

Our eyes meet, the blue in his illuminated by the light of the driveway. I frown, noting the way he has concern written all over his face.

"You don't have to tell me anything," he says. "But I do have one question for you."

I nod, encouraging him to continue.

"Do you really want to do this whole trio costume thing with them?" He asks. "Did you want to hang out with them tonight?"

That was two questions.

I shrug in response. There's not really a solid answer to that question. I don't know. How can I know what I want if I hardly know who I am, what I like?

"You don't know?"

I shake my head slowly.

He sighs. "There's this word, Estella," he continues. "It's a simple one, very useful. Only two letters. One syllable... do you know what that word is?"

"No."

"That's the one." He nods, laughing. "You're actually one step ahead. I was just about to ask you to use in a sentence for me."

I crack an involuntary smile, shaking my head in amusement.

I like Aaron.

No, no.

I like Aaron.

"And it's okay to say no, Estella," he says, breaking the silence and the roaming thoughts. "You don't have to do their trio costume if you don't want to. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. Ever. And if anyone tells you different then you tell them they can fuck off."

"Okay," I murmur. "Thank you. For the ride."

He gives me the tiniest of smiles. I open the door, grabbing my backpack before shutting it behind me. I lean down, curling my palms around the door of the car.

"Are we still on for tomorrow?" I ask him.

"Yeah, for sure," he replies. "I'll pick you up. Good night, Estella."

"Okay. Good night."

I back away from his car, turning to walk over to the front door. A few moments later, I hear the engine of his car ignite and he makes his way out of the driveway.

Unlocking the front door, I turn back once more to watch his car zoom down the street before entering my house.

The all-too familiar empty, cold feeling returns as I step inside, setting my backpack down beside the door. I turn on the lights in the kitchen before taking a seat on my usual white stool.

My mind overflows with everything that occurred tonight. From the daunting conversation about Jacob to Aaron's gentle approach at giving me advice.

It's okay to say no.

I sigh, wishing I had lengthened our conversation as much as I could have. If I could, I would have stayed there all night talking to him.

Right now, it's all I want to do.

But I don't have much time to think about it. My phone starts to ring and Asher's name lights up across my screen. I swipe my thumb across to pick up his call.

"Sorry I missed your call," he says. I can hear some background noise. Music, voices. He's busy. "What's up?"

"It's fine," I reply as I unlock the front door. "I was calling 'cause I needed a ride back from Madison's house—"

"Are you walking?" He interrupts. "Don't. I'll come get you."

"No, Aaron picked me up."

He pauses. "Oh. Okay."

I walk up the stairs to my room. "Yeah. Anyway, it sounds like you're busy. I'll talk to you tomorrow?"

By the decrease of noise in the background, it sounds like he stepped away from everyone. "I'm not busy. Tell me about your movie thing with your friends."

I lie down on my bed and release my hair from the ponytail holding it up. "It was okay. Hey— what do you know about Jacob? Football jock with red hair?"

He's talking to someone. "Did you say Jacob? And why was it just okay?"

"Yeah. Do you know him?" I ask. "It was okay cause the movie was okay and their company was okay."

"I know him. He's a dick." He scoffs. "You should find better company, by the way."

I flip over on my bed, lying down on my stomach instead. "How come you say that? That he's a dick?"

He ignores my question, groaning. "Estella, please don't tell me you're interested in Jacob Matthews."

"I'm not." I shake my head. "But apparently he's interested in me. I don't know why. I don't even know him and honestly, he kinda weirds me out. I don't wanna judge him, though. Vanessa tells me he's a good guy."

"Tell Vanessa to fuck off."

I stifle a laugh. "What are you doing?"

He sighs. "Hanging out with some friends. You?"

"Talking to you," I reply. "But I don't know why you're talking to me. You should probably be talking to your friends, huh? I'm sorry— I'll let you go."

I wait as he says something to one of the friends he's with. I can't make out what he says because he's covering up the microphone. Something along the lines of I'm good. I don't want any.

"Where are you letting me go?" He asks.

"Back to your friends." I laugh. "Wait actually, I have a quick question first."

"Shoot."

I pick at the comforter on my bed, biting the inside of my cheek. "How can you tell when someone isn't being... like, real with you? I sigh. "I don't know how to word it. It's hard for me to tell and sometimes I don't know if people actually like me or if they're just... mocking me. Does that make sense?"

"Did those girls say something to you?"

"No," I reply. "They didn't. They never have. But it's not the things they say that make me overthink, it's more how they say them."

"Bitches," he mutters, scoffing. "Don't let them take up an inch of your brain, Estella. They don't deserve any of your thoughts. Save 'em for something more important than a couple of jealous assholes, okay?"

I smile even though Asher just insulted them more than once. "Thanks, Asher."

Someone calls his name in the background, telling him to join the rest of the group.

"Okay, I'm keeping you away from fun." I laugh. "I'll talk to you later."

"Okay," he replies. "Good night, Estella."

"Night, Asher."

-

author's note:

hey everyone! here's another chapter for you all! this is definitely one of my favorites and a lot of my other favs are coming soon :)

i'm curious to know— who are your guys' favorite characters? maybe it's a little too early in the story to ask but if you already have one lmk 😏

hope you're enjoying!

- blizfvl <3