warning: may be triggering for some, death/suicide/etc.

The Mystery Shack was completely silent. The only sound was the distant chirping of crickets and the occasional car driving by. Everyone was in their beds and were asleep.

Everyone except you.

You had been worrying nonstop about something...you weren't sure what. It felt like you were forgetting the most important thing in the universe, but had no idea what it could be. This wasn't the first time you had felt this way however. Ever since you were in that terrible car crash three years ago with your friends Mabel and Dipper.

Because of that crash you had lost your eye, suffered many minor injuries, and even got a concussion which caused your memory to be completely erased. Little by little everything started coming back to you, but it felt as if major pieces of the story of your life were missing.

You sighed and swung your legs over the side of the bed, stretching your arms as you made your way downstairs to get a glass of water. As you sat at the kitchen table, you quickly developed a small migraine. "Ughhh," you groaned and rubbed your temples.

"Everything okay, kid?" a familiar voice asked. Stan sat across from you, looking sincerely concerned.

"Yeah just a headache," you mumbled, "I should be fine." you continued to rub the sides of your forehead and finally gave up. You downed the rest of the water and then abruptly stood to put the glass in the sink.

"Alright. If you need anything, let me know y/n," Stan said as you went upstairs, "goodnight."

Stan had always seemed so concerned with your well being. In fact, the entire Pines family acted that way. It was sweet but worried you sometimes. It made you feel that their actions towards you supported your suspicions that your memory was missing some important pieces. To your surprise, Dipper was standing at the top of the stairs. Had he been eavesdropping?

"So you have a headache?" he said.

Yup, he'd been eavesdropping.

"Yes but it's no big deal Dipper," you answered, but your voice came out more soft and worried than you meant it to be. You cleared your throat and sighed once more. "Maybe I should just read a book. It'll make me sleepy probably." You noticed a dusty old book in Dipper's hands.

"What's that book about?" you asked, snatching it from him. He looked absolutely horrified as you examined the cover and he desperately tried to grab it back. "What, is it your diary or something?" you giggled.

"Y/n, please don't look at that!" Dipper exclaimed, clawing at your arms as you ran to your bedroom to read whatever juicy gossip Dipper had written in this diary of his. You quickly shut the door and sat on your bed, looking closer at the cover. You could hear Dipper fumbling with the doorknob. He's probably turning it the wrong way AGAIN, you thought to yourself, smiling.

The cover was a dark maroon with a gold hand on it. It looked like there used to be a number written on it but it had faded and you couldn't tell what the number was exactly. You fiddled with your eye patch as you flipped through the frayed and yellowing pages. It seemed to be a journal about mythical creatures. So Dipper writes fairy tales? You continued to scour the pages for something interesting when you came upon a particularly worn page titled: Bill Cipher. What an odd name. It also slightly disturbed you that there were red stains all over the writing, either from ketchup or blood. You were gonna go with ketchup.

The door finally swung open and Dipper stood fuming in the doorway. "I was turning the stupid doorknob the wrong way," he grumbled and raced over to where you sat. He snatched the book out of your fingers and held it close to his chest. "What did you read?" He shouted, "What pages did you read?!"

You smoothed out your white nightgown and rolled your eyes. "I dunno, some weird stuff about gnomes and a unicorn and some triangle with a top hat," you answered.

Dipper's jaw dropped and he sat next to you, gripping your arm with his hand. "Are you okay? Do you remember anything? Does your head still feel weird?"

"No let go of me," you said, pulling your arm out of his grasp, "what the heck Dipper? What's wrong?" Your head suddenly began pounding and your mind began racing. "Argh!" you moaned, slamming your palms to the side of your head.

REALITY IS AN ILLUSION

"Y/n! What's happening?" Dipper yelled, eyes wild and scared. You could hear footsteps thundering up the old wooden stairs.

THE UNIVERSE IS A HOLOGRAM

"I'm FINE, Dipper," you groaned, rocking your head back and forth in an attempt to dull the pain. Mabel, Soos, Ford and Stan ran into the room and surrounded you, all of them looking terrified.

BUY GOLD

"Buy gold," you found yourself whispering, dizzy from the pounding that rang through your mind, "gold. Yellow. Eye. Bill's eye. Cipher. Bill Cipher, Bill Cipher!" Mabel took one of your hands, trying to calm you but you slapped it away.

BYE

You screamed as loud as you can and fell to the ground. Bill Cipher. He stole your eye. He stole your heart. So many memories, happy and sad and painful alike, flooded your mind. "Where is he?!" You demanded, screaming at the top of your lungs.

"He's in your mind," Ford shouted back, "in the dreamscape in your mind! We can't bring him back, y/n, we can't!"

"I know it hurts y/n," Dipper offered, speaking as loud as he was able over your loud sobbing, "but we can't do anything about it! You'd have to die to be with him again!"

You let go of your head and grabbed his shoulders, digging your nails into his skin. "Then kill me!"

Five horrified faces stood before you. Not a word was said as you covered your face with your hands, ripping off the eye patch and rubbing the empty eye socket covered in dried blood. "Kill me! I'm already dead without him, it's been three years, I can't live without him!"

"Even after all he's done," Ford said quietly, shaking his head, "you don't know what you're doing y/n. Get a good night's rest. You'll feel better in the morning." The five of them each gave you a hug as you cried, and after a while they all left your room. Except for the twins, Dipper and Mabel. Your best friends. They said they would stay with you until you fell asleep, just to be safe.

"How c-can I sleep when I remember?" you asked in your hiccup-y voice, tears streaming down your cheeks. Mabel was tearing up as she squeezed you into another tight hug. "Please kill me," you whispered in her ear, "I need to be with him."

"I can't kill you y/n!" Mabel exclaimed and exchanged a frightened glance with her brother. "Okay. I understand," you nodded and put your head on the pillow, closing your bloodshot and watering eye. After a good fifteen minutes, the twins left you alone.

As soon as the door to your bedroom closed you opened your eye and searched the drawers of a nearby desk for paper and envelopes. You were successful in your search and quickly wrote down five short letters. Sticking them in the envelopes and licking them shut, you carefully snuck downstairs and into the shop part of the Mystery Shack. You punched in the numbers to the secret code into the vending machine. Then you tiptoed down to Ford's lab and research room. You remembered a potion that Ford had made a while ago that he was explaining to you two summers ago. He had said that it was a drinkable solution that was made of a high percentage of citrine extract and would kill a person or creature in their sleep in twenty minutes after the drinker took it or most likely even less time than that.

The vile had been a pink liquid and was easy to find. You snuck back upstairs and into your bedroom. You sat on the bed, legs outstretched. Still sobbing and head still throbbing, you tied your eye patch back on and closed your eye tightly as you drank the disgusting pink concoction.

You must have fainted a lot in the past, because the feeling of drifting into black nothingness was so strangely familiar.

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Grunkle Stan,
Thank you for giving me a job at the mystery shack. You have always been like a grunkle to me and have treated me like your own family...

---------

Ford,
I forgive you for everything. Everything that you did had good intention behind it and you thought it was for the best...

---------

Soos and Wendy,
Thanks for always making me laugh. You are such a great friend and I'm happy to have known you for as long as I did. You always put a smile on my face when no one else could...

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Mabel,
I want to thank you for being my best friend. I hope you can understand why I did this. Love makes us do crazy things. Never dull your smile and please never change...

---------

Dipper,
My (other) best friend. You have been there for me through thick and thin. I owe you my life way too many times. Thank you for loving me like a brother and for understanding why I had to do this...

---------

There was light fog surrounding every beautiful green hill on the horizon.

You stood on a flat, soft hilltop with the lush dark green grass and between your toes. There was a thin and dry dirt path and you followed it slowly, walking with caution although there was nothing to be cautious about. The air was so light and the quiet was soothing rather than lonesome as you walked.

Soon you reached the highest point of the hill, where you came upon a gathering of grey rocks that were big enough to sit on but small enough that they were like cushions on the ground. Sitting on one of the rocks in the center was the figure of a man.

He had baggy pale yellow pants and v-necm top. On his feet were black flat shoes and he had a long black cape on his back that was somewhat rippling in the wind. He had a wide brimmed had that was tied around his chin. Attached to this hat was a piece of pale yellow cloth with an eye painted in the center. This cloth covered the man's face.

"Well well well well well...Y/n," he said, and a puff of smoke came from his long wooden pipe, "I'm surprised to see you here in the dreamscape."

"I came to be with you Bill Cipher," you said. Your head was not in pain and your tears had dried up. There was no uncertainty in your tone of voice whatsoever. You saw a sideways smile from underneath the yellow cloth of his. "I can't believe you love me enough to have done this. And the amount of apologies it would take to prove my love for you...it would take me all eternity," Bill said softly, but just as even in tone.

"You don't have to apologize Bill," you whispered, "but we do have all eternity."

Bill dropped his pipe and stood, walking over to you in big strides until you were so close that your noses were practically touching. His breathing blew the cloth up a little bit and he whispered, "take off your eye patch."

You obeyed and untied it. It fell to the floor and immediately disappeared. You were in the dreamscape, after all; everything here was at you and Bill's control.

Bill's hand reached up and covered your eye with his palm. His skin felt cold and nice on the absence of eye and your lips parted. The calming breeze blew around the both of you as he used his other hand to lift his cloth and kiss you, gently.

And everything was at peace.

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Hey guys!
This fanfic is officially over! Yay!*cries*
It has been SUCH an amazing journey writing this! I'd like to thank everyone who has voted or commented because I do read all of them and they honestly make my day. (even if you're yelling at me to update or cursing me because of a cliffhanger.) ;)
I will be continuing with writing some stuff on Wattpad. I won't be writing anything until summer though because of finals. (ew.)
I'm thinking maybe an X Reader request story and a Kylo Ren X OC/Reader? Not sure yet :)
Anyway, I'd love to hear from you guys! Reminder that I don't use Kik anymore so message me over Instagram if you want! My username is @ space.plnts and I'm public now so you can follow me if you'd like.
Thanks again and I'll see you hopefully soon! Love you all!*throws actual Bill Ciphers into the crowd*
-Emy