The time came when I finally had to leave for college. I hadn't wanted to be too far away or completely leave the city like Dominic had when he went to college. I had decided that attending college three and a half hours from home would be alright for me, even though I still had to move out and went to board.

“You know there are colleges located approximately twenty minutes from home that you could still get into,” Dad said to me when he and mom had dropped me off and helped me moved into my dorm room.

“Honey” Mom had warned him.

“What? You know that I'm right. She doesn't need to come out here” Dad had responded.

“Winchester university of business and technology still offers the best degrees in New York though,” I said to him “Haven't you always told me I should strive for the best? It was either here or California”.

“I guess here is fine then” Dad sighed defeated.

“You'll be only three hours away. We can come to visit anytime, and you can always come home whenever you feel like it” mom said.

“Exactly” I had agreed.
“Besides, we won't even notice, but before we know it, three years will pass by so fast, and I'll be done with college”

“Trust me, it is going to seem like an awful lot of time,” Dad said.

“Only because you'll be counting the minutes as hours” Mom had said to him “Honey, Lexi needs to have a life of her own. She's grown up and finally in college, and you know what next. Before you know it, she's going to be finished with college, and one day she's going to move out like Dominic and probably get married, and you're going to have to accept that”.

“Not if I can slow down that process,” Dad said “When you do get back, I'll have a business ready for you to handle. I want you to live at home with us for as long as possible. You don't need to rush”.

“I know Dad, and I won't,” I said to them “However, all of these things will be years away. First allow me to finish off with the dreaded college experience then all the other plans for my life can follow. In fact, this is just the beginning”.

When I made that statement to my parents, I had no idea just how fast my three years would really run out.

~|~|~

The time went by faster than I thought it would. I tried to remain focused while I was in college. I had an aim when I started and that was to keep my eyes on the prize. That prize was my degree and graduating with honors. I tried my best not to get too close with anyone and I most definitely didn't have time for dating. I hadn't even entertained the idea of dating again. I hadn't gone to college to make friends or get a boyfriend and that was my mantra. I also found it hard to trust people after the experiences I have had. The only communication I did was for group and class purposes or whenever I passed one of my classmates in the hallway or something. I didn't want friends. I had heard the saying somewhere that friends were liabilities and not assets. I only needed assets.

Whenever I got midterm break and holidays, I went home and would catch up with family and my friends Zena and Kameron whenever they too were in town. Whenever I visited and saw Dominic too, it was like he had gotten bigger and bigger. He was built and looked more manly now. I was glad that over the years we had both grown up and that we had managed to bury the hatchet. The fact that I was finally aware of the truth about the Luciano family and the whole mafia thing made things easier between us. It turned out that one of the reasons Dominic had been cold towards me when Dad just took me in, was because of the secret he would have to hide from one more person. Another reason was that he had been jealous of the fact that his parents had taken me in, but I had forgiven him a long time ago. And I understood everything.

Are things and time moving too fast? Well, that was because my college life was so boring that I knew it wouldn't be too memorable. I was right, it was hard to remember much from my college life as it was so uneventful and next to nonexistent. I liked things that way. People usually said that time flies when you're having fun, but I think it flies just as fast when you don't care about fun either. Before I knew it, I was more than halfway through college. I had two semesters left before I would finally finish college. I could hardly wait for the time to come as I was so stressed from all the school work that I got while at school. My life was filled with assignments, homework presentations, more assignments, internships, etc. Whenever I got the chance to go home, I would always make very good use of that free time.

Back home I got to spend more time with my family and in my bed. College life deprived me of proper rest, therefore whenever I got it, I took it. And since I hadn't partied or anything while away at school, whatever function that my family had to attend, I made sure that I went with them.

~|~|~

It was the beginning of Christmas break and I would be home in two days. I had run out of tampons just the time when I needed them. I wasn't that close to any of the girls who lived in the dorm, so I had refused to ask
any of them for any. It was already 9:00 pm and the little convenient shops on campus had closed early tonight as I decided to drove to the convenience store a few minutes off-campus. I knew it would be opened late, so I decided to go get a box of tampons.

I got dressed and headed for my car outside the dorm in the student's parking lot. The time was dark by the time I had reached the store and got what I needed. When I was on my way back to the campus, I noticed that the needle showed that my tank was almost empty. I didn't know why I hadn't noticed it when I went to that first store, there was a gas station right there. Anyway, I drove until I came to the next gas station, but it was one of those self-pump stations. It was dark and cold outside, even though I wore gloves my fingers still felt as if they were freezing. I just wanted to get my gas and got out of there as soon as possible because not only was I freezing, but I didn't like the loneliness of the area. I was almost done pumping my gas when an old gray truck drove up. When I saw the two men that got out of the truck, I tried to hurry as I pulled out the hose from the tank, put it back, and tried to close the tank.

“What's a beautiful young thing like you doing alone out here?” One of the men said as he got near to me.

I was instantly alerted and no longer felt safe. I made a quick dash to get into my car, but the guy had been quick as well. He had caught up to me just as I had entered the car and pulled me out.

“Why did you run?” He chuckled as he gripped my arm tightly.

“Let me go!” I screamed at him as I tried to pull away from him.

“Stop fighting princess. We're not going to hurt you, we just want to have some fun” the guy said as he dragged me over to his friend who approached chuckling.

He grinned as he brushed the tipped of his fingers over my cheek. I knew what their intentions were, so I started to scream and tried fighting them. The guy who had held me in the first place covered my mouth and took out a knife and held it in front of my face.

“I wouldn't make any sound if I were you,” he said in my ear as he lifted the top half of my body and his friend grabbed my legs.

I kept struggling and fighting as they carried me towards their truck. I kicked my legs harder and managed to kick the guy who held them in his chest. My feet slipped from his hand and I bit down so hard on the other guy's hand- that covered my mouth -and he let me go long enough for me to get the chance to run. I hadn't gotten much further though before the other guy caught me from behind. I had seen a bin that was near to the gas pump and I grabbed it and swung it over my head hitting the guy. By the time this one had let me go, the one I had bitten came after me again as I ran towards my car. He caught me by my hair and I stumbled and fell as I brought him down with me. I was on the ground, and he was on top of me, he tried to pin me down with his knife at my neck, but I kept fighting and managed to raise my knee connecting him in the crotch. That stunned him momentarily as he rolled off of me and clutched his area. The knife had fallen beside me and I hurriedly picked it up and scrambled to my feet. The guy who I had hit with the rubbish bin came after me.

“Stay back!” I warned him.

“Come on, you're not going to use that knife” he chuckled “Look, your hands are shaking. You've never hurt a fly”

With that, he came at me and I closed my eyes and just stabbed. I opened my eyes and saw that the knife had gone right in his belly. The thought that he would kill me now that I had stabbed him made me withdrew it and stabbed him a few more times. By this time he had to clutch his wounds and stumbled to the ground. The guy that I had kicked into the groin had gotten over his pain as he stood and came at me. I tried stabbing him too, but I missed, and he threw himself at me. I fell hard with him on top of me.

“So you want things the hard way? You'll get it the hard way” he said as he managed to overpower me. The knife had fallen out of my hand, and he was somehow able to get it. He was heavy as he sat on top of me immobilizing me. He had pinned down my arms with one of his hands and held the knife at my neck.

“You try anything else, and you're dead,” he said before he moved the knife down to cut open my jacket and jeans.

I tried moving around, but it wasn't much use. He had managed to immobilized me with his weight. Tears welled in my eyes as I realized what was going to happen and that I wouldn't be able to do anything to stop it. I felt the cold air hit my skin as he had cut open my jacket and the zip area of my jeans. He had reached down to unbutton his pants and I turned my head to the side not wanting to watch what I knew was going to happen. It was then that I saw it, the abandoned beer bottle right there within arms reach if only I had use of my hands. It seemed as if my silent prayers were being answered as the guy let go of my arms to fully unbutton his pants. It seemed as if he had difficulty using one hand to open his fly. The second my arms were free I quickly stretched my hand out towards the bottle, grabbed it, and smacked him hard across the head with it. He barely had time to react as the bottle connected with his temple which caused him to rolled off of me. I quickly scrambled to my feet as I watched him held his head then tried recovering. I knew I probably should have run but the first thing my mind told me to do was to kick him in the head. I landed a hard kick to his head which sent him sprawled on the ground. I used that opportunity to grab the discarded knife that was on the ground, went over to him, and just started stabbing. The thought about everything that these men were about to do to me moments ago caused me to snap. I continued to stab him all over. I felt nothing but anger and fear and wanting to make sure that these guys never tried anything like this ever again. I finally stopped when my hand had gotten tired, and I felt him stop moving. I finally let the knife fall out of my hand as I stood up shakily. The guy was dead and the sight in front of me was extremely gruesome. There was blood everywhere and even my gloves and remainder of my clothes were stained with his blood. I was scared and panicking over what had just happened. I looked oversaw that the other guy who I had stabbed as well seemed to be dead too. Sobbing and shaking, I backed away from the scene and ran back to my car. I knew that even though I could hardly stop my hands from shaking and felt like I was about to pass out, I knew I had to get away from there before anyone else saw or the police came. With bloodied shaky hands, I started the car and drove off. I picked up my phone and rang the first number I had on speed dial.

“Lexi? Are you okay?” Dad had answered on the second ring.

“No, no. They almost... They attacked me.... I- I” I cried as I muttered things incoherently.

“Lexi please, where are you? What happened?!” I heard dad asked frantically.

“I did it again. I killed them”

I had refused to went back on campus in my condition, so I just started for the direction of home. Dad had met me on the way, he had left the second I called. The moment I saw his car, and we stopped, Dad had come out and embraced me. When he saw my condition he threw his jacket around me and held me as I broke down. He had managed to get the location of where the incident happened out of me, but that was all for the night. He immediately escorted me to his car and have some of his men took my car. I heard him gave them instructions to go clean up the mess as we drove off.

The following morning after I was home and spotless from all the remnants from the night before, Mom had been able to calm me down. It was then that I explained everything that had happened. They tried comforting and consoling me. Mom said she knew what I had done wasn't easy, and they were so sorry I had to go through that traumatizing ordeal of killing once again.

I knew that I wasn't as hurt or felt that guilty as the first time. This time I felt nothing. I actually felt relieved over what I had done. I was glad that I killed them, that way they would never hurt anyone ever again. What had me traumatized, however, was the near experience I almost had of getting raped. I hadn't felt one bit of remorse about what I had done. And it was within that moment I knew that I would probably kill again and the next time I did it, it would become easier. It would be something that I felt no remorse about. I had vowed to myself that anyone else who tried to hurt me or my family, would find themselves in big trouble. When it comes to your safety and the protection of your family, at times you just got to do what you got to do.

Sometimes in life you have two choices, it was either you kill or be killed.