***
y/n: your name
c/n: crushes name
e/bf/n: ex boyfriends name
b/f/n: best friends name
r/n: rival name
***
It had been approximately three weeks since your breakup with your ex.

When the both of you got together, everything was great, it was the honeymoon phase. The jokes were funny, the kisses were sweet, the words were beautiful... until they weren't.

You could never pinpoint exactly what happened, but one day, he just snapped.

*flashback brought to you by my depressed mood caused by greys anatomy*

You and your current boyfriend were hanging out together at his house. You were sprawled across his bed reading a book as he sat on the floor and played video games.

Suddenly your phone lit up with the reminder that you were supposed to be getting ready for a friends party that was later that day. You grabbed your small bag you had brought with you that contained the outfit you wanted to change into and some makeup.

"Hey babe, would you mind leaving so I can change?" You asked absentmindedly, laying the clothes out on the bed and getting the makeup out of the bag.

"Why should I leave?" He responded.

"It's cool, I'll just go into the bathroom." You said, picking up your clothes.

"No, what I meant was, why can't you just change in front of me?"

"I don't... want to."

"And why not?" He said, turning off the game console to look at you, getting slightly frustrated.

"I'm just not ready to expose myself like that."

"Expose yourself?! We've been dating for two months and you can't even take your shirt off in front of me? What is that? Do you not trust me or something?"

"hey, i-"

"No. Shut up. Just go change in the bathroom or something you fucking prude"

Excuse me.

You scoffed, running your tongue along your bottom teeth. You shook your head and left the room as he turned back around to turn his game back on.

You went and got changed into a white crop top, black ripped jeans, white converse, and a red leather jacket that would accent the red lines on your white converse. You did your hair into a high ponytail, which you teased to create a sort of badass messy look. Then you swiped on some mascara and called it a day.

Who does he think he's calling a prude.

You didn't even bother going back upstairs into his room, so instead you went into the kitchen, pulling out a bottle of Gatorade and some string cheese. You say at the dining table, snaking on your food while scrolling through your twitter feed.

He finally came downstairs, dressed for the party. He wore a red shirt, black jeans, and the white sneakers you had brought him.

You smiled up at him, standing up and getting ready to walk out of the house. "Hey. Nice shoes there." You smiled.

"They're gross. I couldn't find any nice pair of white shoes so I had to settle for these."

"Those are the shoes I got you for our first anniversary after we went shopping and you wanted them but couldn't afford them. I came back a week later and used every penny of my saved pocket money to buy them for you. How completely gross, huh?"

You shoved past him, walking out of the door and getting into the car.

The car ride to the party was one that was filled with tension. You most definitely were not willing to break your grudge, and he just didn't know what to say.

"y/n, i'm sorry."

"No. No you're not. You're just afraid that if we leave things off like this then i'll go run into the arms of someone else." you said begrudgingly.

He sighed softly and reached over with one hand and held your hand in his. "it's you that i love. i know i've been an asshat lately, but sometimes i just get scared you know."

"scared of what? what could you possible have to be scared of."

"how much i love you. I love you so much that it scares me. Don't you understand? Loving you never was in the plan. Then one day you went and told off r/n and suddenly i had fallen in love. i don't know what love is. ive never felt it or received it till i met you and now the fact that i would quite literally do anything for you scares me because i know that if you asked me to jump off a bridge, i'd jump."

This time, you sighed quietly and squeezed his hand softly. "Just...stop being an asshole."

He nodded and smiled softly, continuing to drive.

As soon as you got to the party, he went to his football jock friends, completely ditching you at the front door.

So much for listening.

You sighed, ignoring the pang in your chest and went to get yourself a drink. After having a beer or two, you partied around for a while. You talked to some friends, danced, and played games.

It had been a couple hours into the party and you needed to breath somewhere quiet, so you went in search of a room.

Going to the furthest one at the very end of the hall, you opened the door, kicking someone's shirt out of the way.

Only at the drop of the cup you had your drink in, did you catch the attention of the two people in the room.

"Y-y/n." e/bf/n was half naked in his boxers on top of a girl who was fully naked.

He's drunk. He's drunk. He has to be drunk.

You walked over to him, tilting his face in your direction and smelling his breath.

No alcohol.

"i'll uh.. i'll send your things to you in the mail." you said quietly, your voice cracking softly towards the end, looking down at the ground so that the tears in your eyes that threatened to me spilled wouldn't be seen by him.

You turned around and closed the door shut, walking out of the party ignoring everyone who called your name.

You walked home in the 30 degree weather, went straight to your kitchen and raided it.

And after that,

You cried.

*end of flashback. Back to the present now ppl let's get this bread*

He just... you don't even know.

Of course you still saw him around at school, but every time you did, you couldn't make eye contact because no matter how hard you tried to feel better, the pain never went away. Seeing his face was like opening the door to see him on top of a naked woman for the first time over and over.

And today? Today you had to see him again.

And just to make matters worse, he's dating the woman you caught him with.

On the one day you thought you had a break, you were supposed to show up at your best friends birthday party.

Unfortunately, your best friends brother is friends with your ex, so he would be there too, but you were adamant on not talking to him. Another unfortunate thing, you still couldn't find a reason to despise her brother, no matter how strong your urge to be petty was.

It was a party. Parties have people. People can talk. To you. So you will talk. To them. Because that's what you do at parties with people. You talk. Yeah, you got this.

You put on a grey tank top that had a large v-neck, and some black jeans with white shoes.

With one last look in the mirror you grabbed your keys and walked out, getting into your car. You drummed your fingers on the steering wheel for a while debating if you should just play the sick card, but then decided that would be to obvious.

*time skip brought to you by i don't belong in this club ft macklemore*

You arrived at the party, stepping out of the car, and getting ready to walk into the house.

C/n (NOTE: this is not your ex boyfriend, it's your current crush who so happens to be your best friends brother. even though it's not the way it might be in real life pls go with it, thank you) opened the door.

"Hey! Y/n, i'm so glad you could make it, my sisters waiting for you. She's having a dilemma on weather or not she wants to wear the red or black heels with her dress." He laughed dismissively, waving a hand through his oh so soft hair, "But you're here now and you look.. amazing.. so i'm sure you're more than qualified to help."

You laughed softly at him. "You're hilarious, where's b/f/n at."

"She's in the living room with everyone else."

"Everyone everyone?" You asked, wanting to know if your ex would be there too.

He nodded softly and sympathetically.

You closed your eyes, and once they opened you had a hard look of determination on your face. "I am a strong, powerful, beautiful woman and nothing he can say to me will prove that wrong. I got this" You said, more to yourself than anyone else. (anyone else do this? ...just me... cool.)

C/nn smiled but did nothing else to signify if he had heard you or not.

"So you gonna walk me and be a good host or am i just a heathen now?" You said, joking around.

"M'lady." He said, bowing ever so slightly and opening the door wider for you.

You laughed as you and him walked into the living room. You adjusted your jeans, and greeted everyone, pointedly skipping two people.

You hung out with b/f/n and c/n, making fun of everyone as more people began to arrive and the party started growing wilder.

When the scene of people drinking violently to forget their problems, hiking and twerking up on men and women to get a prospective lay, and the beer pong games between the football and basketball players started to become a bit too much for you, you and c/n decided to go to the place the sober people were hanging at.

You and c/n walked into a room at the corner of the house. Upon entering, you saw that people were spread across the whole room, a couple of people on the bed, some on the desk and desk chairs, alternate areas of the floor, and against the walls.

You and c/n found a spot in the corner of the room and you both sat on the ground, backs to the wall, knees to your chest.

You were amidst an invigorating conversation with c/n in which you were discussing the different types of things you could fill a bathtub with, and if you could eat or drink a pool of anything, what it would be, when you saw c/n looking at you.

"Okay. Y/n. Listen. If there's anything that i want to die in, it's going to be either lasagna, cheesecake, or a tub full of pink drink."

You laughed at his reply, getting ready to rebut it and tell him that he actually wants a tub full of coffee flavored ice cream, when your ex came over.

"Hey, y/n."

"Uh.. i'm... hi?"

"As bright as ever, i see." he chuckled.

"Excuse me?" you said.

"Oh relax, it was a joke" he said, nudging you playfully.

You scoffed and raised your eyebrows in disbelief, "don't touch me." You said, not liking or appreciating the feeling of his hands on you.

He scoffed softly, "now i know why i didn't like dating you," He said, under his breath.

"Excuse me?" You said, scoffing loudly.

"Well I mean you were so controlling and boring, and you always flirted with other guys right in front of my face like it was nothing, not to mention that one time you gave the dude from starbucks a super long hug. you just don't really know how to have fun and you're kind of a whore, y/n."

"Hey listen man-" C/n spoke up, coming to your defense, but you cut him off needing to defend your own honor.

"Alright. First of all, I never even talked to other guys when I was with you, the most I ever said to another guy was 'hey you got a pencil', and the one time you saw me with another guy it was the pretzel guy who was just making conversation with me while he warmed up the pretzel that I got for you, when you didn't stop complaining. And that guy I hugged was a friend of mine from elementary school. I'm sorry if having friends who are male make me a whore. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Just because a woman enjoys sex and hanging with guys she's suddenly a ho and a terrible influence to other people, and she needs church, whereas if it were a guy, he'd be a cool player and be congratulated. And if you really didn't like dating me then you coulda just broken up with me like a decent human being, instead of cheating on me. That says more about you than me."

C/n looked at you with am impressed look on his face, and you turned to him and grabbed his hand, and got up, walking out and finding another room.

"Y/n," C/n said, still not letting go of your hand even though you guys were already in a pretty private place, "that was amazing. i-wow. you're just.. god i love you even more now." he said, rambling to himself.

you pulled him into you, snaking his arms around your waist, putting yours around his neck.

"y/n-"

"Okay i know i cut you off a lot but listen. I pretended I had feelings for my ex just to be a good person, because I didn't wanna hurt him. I pretend to be okay with things my mother says about me needing to loose weight and dieting and learning how to be more ladylike, and suppress the emotions I actually feel. I'm always thinking and feeling for other people but never for myself, so now i'm thinking and feeling for myself, so let me, okay?"

"okay." he said softly, nodding a bit.

You nodded softly and looked into his eyes with a little excitement but more nerves, and then you slowly kissed him.

You savored this moment. In this moment, you felt bliss. Pure bliss.

you kissed him slowly and sensually. feeling the curves of his lips and exploring his mouth. it was passionate, and strong. but slow, so that you both knew that it was actually happening, and so you'd be able to cherish it longer.

you slowly pulled away, leaving the both of you with swollen lips and tousled hair.

"wow. just wow, that was so.. wow. you're-"

"y/n?"

"yeah?"

"shut up and kiss me."

***
a/n: i'm sorry this sucked i just felt bad for not updating so i had to put at least something out there don't hate me. also.. i'm kinda thinking of doing some new "forbidden" type imagines like teacherxstudent things but nothing too crazy or sexual ya know? it's been requested but idk man.