This chapter is dedicated to JoritaNobrega Thank you for all the votes and lovely comments, hun. You make me smile :)

Liam

A vibration wakes me up from my sleep, and I groan when I see Ryan's name on the caller ID.

"What?" I snap picking up.

"Dude, I've been ringing the doorbell like crazy! Good to know you're not dead. Now, will you open the door?" He says, and I take a look at the time.

It's 10:30. I didn't get much sleep last night. After what happened with Elle, I felt even more empty and troubled than ever. I just wanted Jess. I longed to hold her and feel her touch. But I had made my bed, and I had to lay in it. No pun intended. So I fell asleep after a long struggle when it was almost dawn, and I'm in no mood for company right now.

"Go away!" I say and hang up the phone, putting it back on the nightstand. But it starts buzzing again.

"Ryan, I told you to fuck off!" I snap, louder this time.

"Cheer up! We are going shopping."

Is he serious?

"I'm not playing around, don't call again!" I hang up and lay on my back, fully awake, and agitated.

To my annoyance, my phone starts buzzing again. I groan loudly. If anyone can piss me off to the point of violence, it's definitely Ryan. Actually, scratch that, I can think of a few other people.

I pick up and put the phone against my ear.

"Liam, my dearest, oldest, grumpiest friend, please open the door." He says in the sweetest voice he can muster.

I can't believe this! He is like a bad dream you can't wake up from. I get up, sighing with frustration.

I have the worst hangover from last night. My head is throbbing and aching. But most of all, I feel like something heavy is sitting on my chest. I can't stop thinking about what Ellyn and Ryan said about me being in love. That's absurd! Love is an illusion. Everyone I've ever known that has claimed to be in love only found misery in the end. Because love, if it exists, is nothing but a weakness. People only seek it because they are scared to be alone. But I don't need it because I am not afraid to be alone. I've always been alone, and I've always been okay with being alone, until her.

But I can't be in love with her. I don't even know what that means. I mean, how are you supposed to know when you're in love?

"Wow! You look like shit." Ryan says as soon as I open the door.

"To what do I owe this pleasure?" I glare at him, and he shoves me aside, walking in.

"What happened last night? You left without saying goodbye."

"Seriously, man, what the hell are you doing here on a Sunday morning? Don't you have somewhere to be, a church to go to, a girlfriend to entertain?" I say, walking over to the sink to pour myself a glass of water, ignoring his question.

"I thought you and I could go to the Bike shop and find me a baby. Since I won't be taking your motorcycle." He chuckles.

I down the water and blink at him, wondering what the hell is so funny.

"I know you ended it with Jessica because you couldn't handle the fact that she was actually falling in love with you. If you had waited just a little longer, my car would've been parked in your garage. And I must say I am glad it didn't become a reality. So I'd like to call a truce." He says.

What's with all this talk about love? My nostrils flare with annoyance.

"You know I never gave a damn about your car. I just agreed to the stupid bet because you were being stubborn. And since when did you become such an expert on love?"

"I'm not, but I tell it like it is. And you know I'm right." He says as I light a cigarette. If I'm going to listen to him, I might need to smoke the whole damn factory.

He settles on one of the island stools and stares at me expectantly.

"What?"

"I am waiting for you to get ready so we can leave. Ryder said the shop only stays open till midday, so hurry up, would you?" He says.

I shake my head firmly.

"I'm not in the mood. Why can't you just go with Louis? I'm sure he'll be happy to keep you company." I say, blowing the smoke out through my nose.

"But everyone there loves you. Come on! It won't take long. I need you, buddy." He says, and I sigh.

All this back and forth is worsening my headache. I should have switched my phone off and ignored it altogether when I had the chance. I don't know how Stefani deals with him.

I put the cigarette out on the ashtray.

"Fine, I'm gonna take a shower. Just wait here." I say, not hiding my annoyance.

"Sure, captain obvious." He pulls his phone out, grinning at me.

I take a quick shower and change. My eyes look like they have been paper sprayed, so I grab some shades before heading out. The shop is a couple of miles out of town. When we get there, we are greeted by a few familiar faces. It's nice to see the place. I haven't been back here since last summer.

"Liam!? Is that you?" Kendra beams at me, exiting a back room. She is wearing a barely-there top, revealing her inked chest and arms.

"Kendra." I smile back as she rushes to me to give me a hug.

"It's been so long! We missed you, Liam." She says.

"You don't miss me?" Ryan feigns offense, and she rolls her eyes.

"You were here last week, Ry." She says to him and turns to me. "Tell me you'll race. The freestyle opens in a few weeks." She grins.

"Sounds like a good time!" I shoot her a small smile. "Where is Dawson?"

"He went into town with Ryder." She tells me.

"Oh! I thought Ryder would be here. We're here to see the new models. He told me you guys got new stuff." Ryan says to her.

"You buying?" She eyes him.

"Yeah. Finally got the money." He grins, and she smiles at him, leading us in.

We run into some old friends while we look. Ryan finally decides on one and takes it out for a test drive with Kendra racing him.

"Liam?"

I turn around, startled.

"I thought that was you. Wow! It's been a while" She makes her way towards me.

"Lola."

Fuck!

"You said you'd call and just disappeared. What happened? I thought you liked what we did. I know I did." She says, suggestively smiling at me. I don't know whether to be alarmed that I don't remember half the things that happened that night or be glad that I don't.

"How have you been?" I ask, changing the subject.

"Been good. Dyed my hair purple. You like?" She twirls around.

"Sure." I nod.

Thankfully, I don't have to indulge in the small talk for too long because Ryan and Kendra come roaring in. They step off and start wrestling.

"I told you I'd beat your ass." She says, shoving him and laughing hysterically.

"Because you took the wrong turn. You cheated." He says, catching up to her. When they see us, their smile slowly dies.

"So, are we done?" I ask.

"Yeah, I'll take it." He says to Kendra, and she beams at him.

"Snake will be happy to hear we sold. It's been slow." She says.

Snake is the owner of the shop. The first time I met him, we almost brawled to death. He mistook me for some spoiled brat looking to spend his parent's money. I had to prove him wrong the hard way. He is sort of known around here for taking in strays, myself included. This place was basically my home last summer.

"You know, there is a party at old Billy's tonight. Everyone will be there. You two should come." Kendra says.

"No."

"Sure."

Ryan and I say at the same time, and we give each other a look.

"You guys should totally come. It's going to be lit." Lola eyes me.

She is trouble, this one.

"We'll be there." He says, smiling at them, and I curse under my breath.

Jessica

"God! You worry too much." Steff shoves a spoon full of Ice Cream in her mouth, and I sigh.

"I feel like I gave him the wrong idea. I don't know what the hell got into me!" I groan, burying my face in my palms.

I was drunk and miserable, but that's no excuse to kiss a friend.

"So you had a little drunken kiss moment, big deal! You two are both single. I seriously don't get why you're stressing."

"I guess it happens, but still."

I know Jayden is understanding, and he never makes things awkward. He even texted me this morning to see if I was feeling better, and he didn't bring up the kiss.

"Was it good, though?" Steff eyes me sideways.

"Steff!" I shriek.

"What? Don't be such a prude!"

"It was fine. Can we not! I don't feel like recalling the details." I say, licking the Ice cream off my spoon.

"I need to pee, and you need to stop being a drama queen." She rolls her eyes, jumping off the bed.

We have been busy sending out College Applications all day. Steff and I are not exactly seeing eye to eye on the places we want to go to. Our schools held carrier day a couple of weeks ago, and I kept an open mind while talking to representatives from different schools. I also took a few brochures to help weigh my options. But Steff, on the other hand, has had her eyes set on NYU for as long as I can remember, and she wasn't at all interested in exploring her options. I finally succeeded in convincing her to apply to different schools. But she says she won't go anywhere else even if she doesn't get accepted to NYU, which is just ridiculous.

I, on the other hand, don't want to go near the city. I have always dreamed of studying overseas. Preferably somewhere in Europe. Which is why I applied to a few photography schools in France. But New York has never been my dream. Besides, every time it is mentioned, all I think about is Liam.

Speaking of, I grab my phone and log into snap chat. I have been trying to stay away from all socials because I can't resist the urge to see what he is up to. Not that he is big on social media. He barely posts anything. Which is great for me, I guess. The last thing I need is falling into the black hole of cyberstalking.

I scroll and see a few stories of kids from school. They are mostly of Sanchez's Saturday night party. I log out and switch to Instagram. Madison's picture is the first thing that pops up. I guess she finally got that hair extension she's been raving about at rehearsal all week. I scroll down.

Wait!

There's a picture of Ryan leaning on a motorcycle, captioned new baby, and there are three girls in the picture with him. Hot tattooed pierced biker chicks! I hear the bathroom door open, and I sit up straight.

Steff looks at me quizically.

"What's up?" She walks over and sits on the bed, and I hesitantly place my phone in her hand.

"What do we have here? New baby?" She laughs. "So, this is why he needed Liam so badly today."

My heart drops.

"Liam is with him?"

"Yeah." She eyes me with a raised brow. "Jess, he is gonna be around whether you like it or not. And he is gonna live his life." She says, and I look away.

"I know."

***

By dinner, my stomach has twisted into a million tiny knots, and I can't focus on anything. A voice in my head is nagging me to text or call Liam. I'm not sure what I'd say or if he'll even answer, but the urge is almost overpowering. When it comes to him, my self-control is basically non-existent.

I know Steff would never give me a go on this insane idea, so I walk into the bathroom to dial his number. I just want to hear his voice. I can blame it on butt dial, or something, later.

I take a deep breath before dialing his number. It rings once, twice, and for the third time. Just when I think he isn't going to answer, a voice comes.

"Hello."

My heart plummets to the pit of my stomach, and my breath catches in my throat because it's a girls' voice. I lean on the sink for support because I feel light-headed.

"Hello, who is this? I can hear you breathing, you know?" The girl slurs.

I immediately hang up and let my phone slide out of my hand, feeling my heart pound painfully against my ribs. I know for sure that wasn't Red. And the girl sounded drunk.

Oh, God! Why did I call? I'm so stupid. He actually let a girl pick up his phone!

My stomach hurts. This is it. Whatever remaining hope I had of us working things out is absolutely relinquished. There is no coming back from this.

I make a sound between a sob and a gasp, and a knock comes on the door.

"Jess, are you alright?" Steff's soft voice calls, and I open the door.

"What's wrong?" She asks with alarm when she sees my tears.

"I know I shouldn't have, but I called Liam, and a girl picked up."

Liam

"You know that girl is practically peeling your clothes off with their eyes, right? What are you doing standing here?" Kendra says to me, and I give her a small smile.

"Seriously, go talk to her. The girl at 9 o'clock." She says, and I turn around to see a brunette in a tight black dress that leaves nothing to the imagination. She is swaying with the music, eyeing me flirtatiously.

"She's been gawking at you ever since she got here." Kendra nods at me suggestively.

"Do you want me to go beat her ass up? Because I will!" Lola slurs, blowing smoke out through her nose and staring daggers at the girl. Kendra snatches the cigarette out of her hand, giving her a glare.

We've only been here for almost an hour, and I'm already bored out of my wits. Before we came here, I told myself all I needed was to hook up with a couple of girls and get Jess out of my system. At least for the night. But that didn't really turn out well for me the last time, so why even bother?

Ryan snaps his fingers.

"Look alive, Disick!" He scolds, and I realize I've just been staring at the drink in my hand for the last few seconds.

"And you? Why aren't you grinding with some girl already?" Kendra eyes him.

"Because I'm taken, for now." He tells her and avoids my eye.

Taken? I had suspected that Stefani was growing on him, but I didn't see this one coming.

"Liam, let's get out of here. I'm bored." Lola slurs. "I promise to make it worth your while." She runs her finger down my chest smiling flirtatiously up at me.

"Lola, would you give it a rest! He isn't interested." Kendra snaps at her, and Lola immediately turns around.

"No need to be a spiteful bitch. It's not my fault that you have a boyfriend. You obviously can't have him." She says, swaying a little.

"Girls, don't fight! There is enough of him to go around." Ryan says, smirking at me.

I glare at him, watching as Lola pushes her way through the crowd heading towards the door. The place is getting packed, and the music seems to be getting louder by the second. Snake and his buddies come over to hang with us, and they try to engage me in a conversation. But I just keep zoning out.

In all the buzzing and craziness, I find myself missing Jess again. Dawson and Ryder join us, and they keep commenting on my lack of enthusiasm. The truth is I'd rather be back home, making her dinner while she eats her Ice Cream and asks me a million questions. Or sit through another one of her shows just so I can stare at her when she isn't paying attention. And I don't care how pathetic that makes me sound. She was the only calm in the mayhem, that is my life. And now she is in Jayden's arms. What makes this even worse is knowing that he is the kind of guy that can actually make her happy. And I can't hate him for that. Or at least I shouldn't.

"So, who is she?" Kendra asks.

"Who?" I ask, a bit startled.

She gives me a pointed look.

"The girl you're in love with." She says, and I frown.

"Liam, it's so painfully obvious." She says, chuckling, and I curse Ryan inwardly for dragging me here. The last thing I need right now is an intervention.

"I am not in love with her," I tell her curtly.

"So there is someone." She smiles knowingly. "You were nothing like this the last time you were here. You should see yourself. You look like a puppy that's been kicked. It's so cute." She says, and I snort.

There is nothing cute about the way I'm feeling.

"So, what's her name?" She asks.

"Jessica," I say with a frown.

Saying her name out loud hurts surprisingly.

"Pretty name. So what happened?" She asks. I don't want to have this conversation right now.

"Long story short, I fucked up," I tell her.

"That is short." She says and breaks into a grin.

"What are you two talking about." Lola comes out of nowhere and squeezes herself between us.

I think I'm done here.

"I think I'm going to head back," I tell Ryan, who is laughing about something with the guys.

He turns around and frowns.

"But the party is just getting started."

"You stay and enjoy yourself. I'm calling it a night." I say, grabbing my jacket before making my way to the door.

"Liam," Lola calls, yelling over the noise, and I sigh, turning around.

"What?"

"You dropped your phone on the couch earlier, and I was keeping it safe for you." She says, digging through her purse.

I shove my hand in my pocket, and sure enough, my phone isn't there.

***

Hey lovelies, I have officially changed the title and cover of the story even though my cover designing skills are lacking. I hope you guys weren't confused about the change. No one had anything negative to say about the new title in the last chapter, so I just went with it. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Make sure to vote and comment. And thank you, guys! You always make me smile.

Much love,

Becca :)