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Liam

"What is going on? Is everything..." Ellyn trails off when she sees Jayden. She frowns and darts her eyes back to me.

"Now that she is here, are you gonna tell me what the hell this is about?" Jayden says. "I had to cut class to be here."

Ellyn takes a seat with a frown on her face.

"I wanted you both here because this couldn't be done over the phone," I say.

"What, are we forming a Cult or something? Get to the point!" Jayden snaps.

I take a deep calming breath and remind myself why we're here. I can't lose my temper now.

"This is about Amanda," I say, and I watch as Jayden's eyes harden, I know he is about to start throwing punches, so I dig the letters out. "I was at Louis' place yesterday, and I found her notebook, the one that was missing. He had it in his room. She had left us all a letter, and I found them yesterday inside her Journal."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Jayden stands up. "Is this some sick joke?"

We are sitting at the bleachers with the varsity cheerleaders practicing just a few feet down from us. Their enthusiastic cheering is giving me a mild headache.

I hand Jayden his letter.

"This is yours. She had it all planned out. Louis knew this whole time."

Jayden snatches the letter from my hand and traces the bold letters that spell his name with his fingers.

"This is her handwriting." He breaths, his face going pale.

"I'm sorry," I tell him, not knowing what else to say.

Ellyn lets out a small choke and clamps her hand over her mouth when I hand her the letter.

"Louis has her notebook? He has had it this whole fucking time?" Jayden asks when his shock subsides.

"I should have gotten it yesterday, but something happened, and I had to leave. I'm sorry."

"Give me his address." He shoves his phone in my hand, his jaw ticking.

"I don't think that's a good idea. I'll go get the Journal." Ellyn says.

"You are not going there alone," I tell her sternly, and I turn to Jayden. "Look, I already beat the shit out of him yesterday if that's what you're after. But-"

"Liam, give me the damn address! I don't want to hear about how this is a terrible idea. That low life took my sister's last words and hid them. Do you have any fucking idea how fucked up that is?" Jayden growls, attracting attention.

A few cheerleaders glance our way and start whispering amongst themselves.

I only hesitate for a second before typing the address on his phone. Ellyn looks at me with wide eyes shaking her head. But it's already done. The moment I hand him his phone back, he turns around and marches away.

"Liam, this is not good! He is going to go there and start a fight." She says as soon as he walks away.

"Maybe he should. God knows Louis deserves all the beating he can get." I spit. "Besides, he has Amanda's Journal. Who am I to tell Jayden he can't go get it?"

"I could have gone."

"If you go there alone, do you really think he is just going to hand you the Journal?" I ask with frustration. "Which part of he is fucked up did you not get, Elle? He tried to force himself on Jess last night."

She gasps.

"What!?"

"I walked in before he could do anything." I clench my jaw and breath through my nose, fury running through my veins. "He saw how drunk and defenseless she was, and he just went for it. He is dangerous. Stay away from him."

She rubs her temples roughly.

"This whole entire situation is so fucked up, Liam. I mean, what the actual fuck? The fact that Manda wrote us letters and Louis hid them still hasn't registered, and now you're telling me he is some kind of a sick rapist."

I step up one row, and I sit next to her.

"Listen, Elle. I know it's all hard to process. Believe me, I get it. Take time and read the letter. As for Louis, that piece of shit is heading back to London, and I have a feeling we won't be hearing from him again."

She nods and runs her fingers through her hair, twirling the ends of the strands.

"Are you taking your meds?" I ask softly.

Her eyes meet mine, but she quickly looks away.

"I am fine now, Liam. I don't need them."

"The doctor said-"

"I know what she said." She interrupts. "But I am better now."

I sigh and decide to let her be for now. But it worries me. The first period is probably over by now, and Jess has a few minutes before her next class. I need to be with her right now. Even if it's only for a few minutes. We are growing dangerously attached to each other by the day, and I know it's far from healthy. But she is my safe haven.

I stand up and grab my backpack.

"You're leaving?" Ellyn's eyes fill with disappointment.

"Yeah. Do you need me?" I arch a brow.

"Actually, yes. I was wondering if you could sit with me while I read the letter. I am scared to read it alone." She looks up at me, begging me with her eyes to stay.

My heart tells me to go to Jess and spend whatever minutes she has with her, but I decide to let my head win this time. I haven't been much of a friend to her lately, and this is the least I can do.

I take a huge breath, taking a seat once again.

Jessica

"I should have gone out with you!"

"For the hundredth time, I am fine. Nothing actually happened, so it's okay. You sound just like Liam." I tell Steff.

"Well, we both love you. And something did happen. I am just glad he got there when he did. Ryan said he beat Louis up pretty bad. I stayed with Jameson while he drove Louis to the hospital last night."

"What?" My eyes widen.

I thought he was fine when he started going back and forth with Liam last night, even though I can't recall most of the conversation.

"Yeah, I thought you knew. Liam broke a few of his ribs and fractured his jaw. But he deserved so much worse." Steff grits her teeth.

I shudder at the memory of his bloody face. If I had stayed in bed with Liam as he suggested, none of this would have happened. But I am also glad we went because if we hadn't, Amanda's letters wouldn't have been found. I was shocked when Liam told me what she confessed. That he didn't sleep with her. I felt relieved at first, but then a surge of anger took over. Liam carried so much guilt because of a lie she told. But then I scolded myself for being mad at a girl who's already passed. I can't imagine what she must have been going through.

"I need to go talk to Jayden," I tell Steff.

Liam said he would tell them both as soon as he got the chance, and I am hoping he already has.

"Don't you have class?" She arches a brow.

"Yeah, Calculus. We have it together."

"Oh!" She nods. "Got it. See you at lunch?"

"Yeah." I give her a small smile, and I make my way to Calculus.

I was sort of hoping I'd see Liam in my 15 minutes break. Yesterday was one of the worst nights of my life, and Liam was my rock. He was so affectionate and caring. I feel like we crossed some invisible line in our relationship last night. My love for him has intensified by ten folds if that's even possible. My safety isn't attached to a place anymore. He is where I feel the safest.

"There you are, Snowflake." Brittany's voice rings in my ear, snapping me back into reality.

She is in her cheerleading uniform, smiling in that condescending way of hers. Chelsea Gorge is next to her, both their dark hairs tied up in high ponytails.

"What do you want, Brittany?" I ask sternly. I don't have the time nor the patience for her snide comments right now.

The two of them look at each other and smile.

"We saw Liam cuddled up with Ellyn at the bleachers. They are probably still there. That girl is gorgeous." Chelsea says.

My blood boils, but I don't let them see it. I keep my expression neutral.

"Every time I turned around, he had his arms wrapped around her. They looked very intimate. We just thought you should know. Us girls should look out for each other." Brittany says with mock concern, and then her eyes sparkle with mischief.

"She is his friend. They hang out. I knew they were together by the bleachers. So if you think this is news to me, you're wrong." I lie.

"Oh! So you are willingly handing him over to her?" Brittany says, and they laugh in unison. With their matching blue and yellow cheerleading uniforms and similar complexion, they vaguely remind me of the twins from The Shining.

"Just when I think you couldn't be dumber, you go and prove me wrong." She chuckles. "I feel sorry for you."

"This is gold coming from a girl who couldn't keep an idiot like Elliot interested for long. I feel sorry for you! Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a class to get to."

Their jaws drop, but I don't wait to hear what they have to say. I walk past them, my entire body trembling with anger. I so did not need that! I know Liam needs to be there for Red. Amanda was her best friend after all, but it still sucks to hear. But not wanting him to comfort Red would be hypocritical when I am trying to do the same for Jayden.

Jayden.

I bring my phone out to check the time and groan. There are only five minutes left of my break. Now I won't even be able to talk to him.

Thanks, Brittany, bitch.

When I walk into class, everyone except Jayden is there. I say hi to Heather and Gerg and take my seat. Mr. Mahogany goes on and on about second derivatives, and he ends up giving us a worksheet. The whole time I am fidgeting and looking at my watch. Jayden never misses class. I don't wanna worry, but I do.

When I leave class, I decide to text Liam and ask him what happened. Brittany's words are still ringing in my ears, but I do my best to ignore them.

How did it go?

I make my way over to my locker to drop my books.

Not great. Jayden didn't take the news well. And Ellyn was a mess after reading the letter.

I read it and sigh, placing my books inside. Another text comes through.

Are you okay?

I lean against the locker, typing a reply.

I'm good. Don't worry about me.

The text Bubble appears immediately.

I love you.

I smile at the text.

I love you, too.

I close my locker after grabbing my assignment papers for Physics.

I sit in class, barely listening, as the teacher explains the Laws of Thermodynamics. The day seems to drag on forever. I type texts to Jayden multiple times and end up deleting them.

At lunch, I look for him around the Cafeteria, but I don't find him. Steff sees me from across the room, and she waves her hand. I return the gesture, but I decide to forego lunch. I cover all the places I think he might be, and just when I start to wonder if he left school, I see him out in the courtyard sitting by one of the stone benches.

I take a deep calming breath before making my way over.

"Jade?" I call when I am next to him, and his head snaps up.

Green bloodshot eyes meet mine, and my breath hitches. We look at each other in silence, and a look of understanding washes over his features. He knows I know.

"Can I sit?" I ask, gesturing at the spot beside him.

He nods.

I step over and sit next to him. Now that I am here, I have absolutely no idea what to say. And I just sit next to him in silence.

"How much did he tell you?" He asks.

"Everything," I answer.

"All this time, I blamed him for her death. I blamed him for everything but-" He takes a shaky breath. "I am the worst brother in the world!"

"Jayden, don't say that."

"I should have known something was wrong. Those last few days... I should have known. We're twins for God's sake!" He shoves his fingers through his hair. "Amanda was diagnosed with Dysthymia. It started after mom and dad died. My aunt got her into therapy, and there were ups and downs, but she was never suicidal. And after London, she seemed better, happier. I thought maybe-"

I put my arms around his shoulders.

"You can't beat yourself up over this, Jayden. You loved your sister. Sometimes things happen that are out of our control. There is no way you could have known if she didn't confide in you."

"But she shouldn't have to spell it out, Jess, I should have paid attention. She just seemed so happy. I don't know what the hell I thought! That maybe she was suddenly cured." He laughs humourlessly. "I knew she stopped going to therapy, but she said she was taking her pills. She promised she'd go back if she felt like she needed to. And I actually took her word for it. How fucking brilliant!"

I want to ask him what she said in his letter, but I feel bad invading his privacy when he is obviously hurting.

"I know it's easy to blame yourself right now, but you couldn't have known. You are not a mind reader."

"You don't get it." He sighs. "She was my other half. I was supposed to protect her, but I failed. I channeled all my energy towards making Liam's life a living hell. His relationship with his father was hanging by a thread, and I made sure to ruin it beyond repair. I followed him here in hopes of ruining anything and everything he would ever love. He was right to warn you about me, Jess. I was full of hatred. When I saw how smitten he was with you, my intentions weren't entirely pure. If I hadn't met you the way I did-" He trails off.

This takes me aback, but I don't want to ponder on it. We've all made mistakes. We have all been hurt, and we have hurt people in return.

"None of that matters because we turned out to be friends. You are a good person, Jayden. Don't do this to yourself."

He roughly rubs the middle of his forehead with his fingers.

"Thank you." He says, but his eyes remain hard. "I am going over to see that motherfucker later. He still has her Journal."

"Jayden, Liam already put him in a hospital bed. Don't go and get in a fight." I say, worried he might get himself in trouble.

"Oh, I plan to. But Ellyn insisted on coming with me, so don't worry."

Oh! That's nice of her, I guess.

"Thanks for coming out here." He gives me a tight-lipped smile. "Today has been shit. I didn't see any of this coming."

I nod in understanding.

"What are friends for, am I right?"

He flashes me a small but genuine smile.

We talk a little bit, and I head inside to find Jeremy talking to Penelope, and Steff is nowhere to be seen. I sigh, beginning to turn around, but Jeremy catches my eyes, and he waves at me. He says something to her before making his way over to me.

"Hey." I greet him with a smile. "What was that about?"

He scratches his head awkwardly.

"To be honest, I don't really know. Penelope is cool. And I know she likes me but-"

"But you love Steff," I finish.

He sighs.

"I know how dumb this is."

"It's not dumb," I assure him quickly. "But she is dating Ryan right now. Unless you plan to tell her how you feel, I don't see why you shouldn't do the same. Just try it out, and if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out. What's meant to be will be."

He gives me a puzzled look.

"What have you done to Jess? I don't know this calm, wise person."

I arch my brow and swat his arms playfully.

The day rushes by after lunch. And before I know it, school is out. I see Red in the hallway when I make my way to the exit, and she gives me a genuine smile, but I am too stunned to return it.

Just then, my phone buzzes in my pocket, and I dig it out, hoping it's Liam. But to my dismay, it's daddy dearest.

"Jessica." He says as soon as I pick it up.

We haven't spoken since he kicked me out of his house that night.

"Jonathan."

He grumbles, and I picture his scowl.

"Dad." He corrects. As if! "How have you been?"

"Like you care!" I scoff. "You kicked me out of your house and didn't even bother to call and check if I got home safe. What do you want this time? Do you want me to attend the bridal shower?"

"As polite as ever, I see." He sighs. "Margaret and I are spending Christmas with her family in Indiana, but I'd like for you and your brothers to come over the weekend after. And bring your boyfriend with you. I'd like to meet him."

My heart drops. How the hell does he know about him? I know mom wouldn't tell him. I told her not to.

And then it clicks. Elliot's mom. Ugh!

"I don't know. I may be busy that weekend." I lie.

The last thing I need right now is my father upsetting Liam with his blatant rudeness. And I know he will do it just to spite me.

"You know you can't hide him forever." He says. "I will meet him eventually. I am your father, after all, for better or for worse."

***
Hey, guys! How is everyone doing? I'm sorry this chapter took longer than usual. The holidays kept me busy and then I had deadlines due for work. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Don't forget to vote and comment :)

Stay safe!

Much love,
Becca