THERE WAS A FAINT BEEPING IN THE BACKGROUND. I still couldn't find the energy to open my eyes. Every part of my body ached in pain. My mind was barely awake. Instead, I just listened.

Footprints were heard everywhere, they were in the room, in the hall, there were even ones pacing with worry. I couldn't see who they belonged too. Everything hurt. Everything felt sore. It felt as if someone smacked the back of my head with a hammer or squeezed my brain between their heavy hands.

People muttered words to each other and I could barely make out any of them. Or, at least most of them. They were all probably talking about me and once upon a time, I probably would've cared. This time, I didn't. I wanted to sink back into whatever sleep I was in and maybe never wake up.

There was one voice that was clear to me. One that probably belonged to the person that clutched onto my hand too tightly. Their grip was tight, yet gentle at the same time. Comforting, I guess, would be a better word.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm so, so sorry." The voice was of someone I knew. Dad already apologized. I told him none of this was actually his fault. He couldn't take the blame for anything. I needed to open my eyes, tell him that everything was going to be okay. I couldn't respond though, simply a groan was able to escape my lips.

"Shh... it's okay Lauren, stay still, lie down sweetheart." He sound like he's on the verge of breaking. "Everything is okay now. Everything is back to as normal as it can be, kid. I'm just so, so sorry. I can't do this anymore, kid.

"I love you more than anything in the world, Lauren, but everything is falling apart... I just can't--" He paused, trying to control his breathing. "Your... mother was the one that had everything under control, until, well, she kind of lost it with the Institute and I was just kind of tagging along and trying to do the best I can, kid. I wanted a family with her and... and this is how it turned out in the end."

It was quiet for a long time. It felt as though he was waiting for a response for me but I couldn't. Even if the thoughts in my hear were going a mile a minute, I couldn't pass through the weight holding me down. 

"I -- I was never able to do anything. I can't help you now and I don't think I can do anything once you're here, conscious, and I'm sure you'll need someone -- anyone -- that can give you all the help you need, kid."

His words were all over the place. I couldn't piece together what he was trying to say.

"I'm going to try to be there, okay kid? Okay Lauren? You're all I have left and I love you more than anything in the world, I hope you know that. If I'm being honest kid, I'm not doing so well. I don't know what I'm going to do."

He leans over, pressing his lips onto my forehead. "Get better, sweetheart." I smell alcohol from his breath, knowing that probably isn't a good sign.

I hear the creak as he leaves the side of my bed. I don't want him to go. I want to hear his voice as I fall asleep and I want it to be the first thing I hear when I wake up. He was the only immediate member of my family I had left. I didn't want that to be the last time I heard Dad's voice. 

He really did make it sound like it was going to be the last.

- - -

The white lights send my senses into overdrive. I'm panicking. My ears are ringing. I need to scream, swing my arms and legs everywhere, trying to make a tantrum. I haven't been awake since Dad was there to talk to me. Everything still hurt. My body still ached. Yet this time, I found the energy to scream from the top of my lungs, but the doctors were able to pin my body down to the bed before I broke something and/or injured someone.

And then realization hit me. Doctors. And if there are multiple doctors or nurses in a room, I'm sure it could only mean one thing. A hospital. I was back in a hospital.

I did not want to be here.

"Let me go," I screeched, not wanting the hands all over me. "Let go of me or... or... or else." I couldn't think of anything more creative. I just hoped it was going to work. 

"Lauren please, just let us help you. We're trying to figure out what happened to you that night. Please Lauren, just breathe. Breathing won't hurt you. In through the nose, out through the mouth."

I didn't recognize who was talking to me but I did as they said. But with every breath, I felt like I was drowning, realising that for as long as I live, I'll probably always be an experiment. People will always try to know what I can do and what I am capable of.

I'll never just be human. 

- - -

I am sitting on the edge of my hospital bed, my gown hanging loosely on my shoulders. I was in desperate need of talking to someone, and the only people that ever came to visit me were doctors and nurses. I did not want to talk to them. Even if it was Kassandra's mom, who has only ever been nice to me. 

I wanted to talk to Dad. I wanted his to hold me and tell me stories that I didn't remember and I wanted to be the family I always wanted but never got to experience, even if half that family was gone. I wanted to eat real food that wasn't prepared in a hospital kitchen where there barely was food. The world was a mess. This was just the beginning of the recovery.

And then, finally, there was a knock at the door. I'm hoping for Dad. I wanted to ask him about what he was talking about earlier. I just wanted the comfort of family.

Instead I got Tyson. He wasn't family but he was close enough. He was a friend. He cared about me. He would tell me everything that's happened, because no one has told me what's happened so far. The spare time just gave me time to think about all the people I've lost.

"Hey," he said, closing the door behind him. I try to give him a small smile, but I can't. Nothing about what's happening to our world is happy. We've lost almost everyone we've cared about. At least Tyson has all his siblings. "I'm sorry I couldn't get to you earlier. It's been a busy couple of months."

I pursed my lips when he says months. I wasn't told how long I was unconscious. Tyson probably knew I was awake for only about a week, doing barely anything. I mostly just sat at the edge of my bed, waiting. Thinking. 

He noticed how my eyes grew wide when he said the word 'months'. Running his fingers through his hair, which was dripping in sweat, he took a seat beside me. "I was told you were told barely anything about what's happening, I didn't think they didn't let you know how long it's been." He paused. "Three months. It's been three months since you ended the war. It's almost the end of October."

I don't say anything in response. That's probably why the very little trees there were outside had leaves of reds and oranges. It was summer when the war started. Most of my life was being taken away by long slumbers. I'm going to end up being like Aurora in Sleeping Beauty.

"Are you going to say anything or what?" he asked. "Can you even talk?" He adds in jokingly, but slowly his laughter fades. "Lauren, you're scaring me."

"I want to talk to Dad," I say, my voice hoarse. I barely spoke since I woke up screaming. Some doctors were even considering to make sure I could still talk, if I needed vocal therapy or something. "Can I talk to Dad?"

I try to make eye contact, but he pulls away. "Lauren, I--"

"He said he was going to be there for me, Tyson." I could feel the tear in the corner of my eyes. I could almost hear the next words from his mouth. "Tyson, I want to talk to my Dad."

"I'm so sorry, Lauren."

I've heard those words over and over again so many times. They barely meant anything anymore, apart from the fact that when I replay them in my heard over and over again, I hear it in Dad's voice. I've lost my family completely. I guess there was Jessica but--

"How?" I managed to choke out. 

"Listen, I don't want you to take it the wrong way. Obviously he lost his family too and he managed to love a portion of your mother and I guess he couldn't handle it that well and--"

"Suicide," I whispered.  He left me by choice. Did he remember I was still here? Of course he did, but he  still chose to go. He chose to kill himself. 

Tyson nodded. I could see the sadness in his eyes. "Overdose."

"They're all gone," I whispered, pulling my knees into my chest. "I thought Daddy was going to be there for me."

"I'm--"

"Don't say you're sorry." I wanted to cry again. I couldn't do this anymore. I'd be better off dead, but I'm still alive. Why am I still alive? I should've been the first to leave, nearly five years ago at age twelve. I should've been gone.

I sniffed. Tyson handed me a tissue. I found myself unable to cry even if I wanted to. I felt numb over. I couldn't feel anything. I wiped my eyes and said, "What else? What happened? Fill me in, please."

Tyson gulped. "Okay... okay, do you want to start right after you blanked out?"

I shrugged. "Sure, whatever."

Tyson seemed to scan his brain on what happened. "You probably found a way to disable the mind control, Lauren. From your own mind. You blanked out and everything just... kind of went to normal, I guess. There was an Evolutian following me when I was chasing after you, and when you fell, he kinda just took note of everything around him. He was free."

"I stopped it," I repeated to myself

"Yes, you did."

"Aidan knew I could do that."

"He probably did."

"Okay, okay, I ended it. I did it. I stopped it. I guess it might've been a little too much for me," I stated. 

Tyson nodded. "We weren't sure if you were going to wake from the coma, Lauren, which probably added to your father's list of stressors. Your heart actually stopped a couple times throughout the month."

You should've just let me die.

But all I managed to say to that was, "Oh. What about the members of the Institute? What happened to them? And Jessica?"

He paused before he began to answer. "You're handling this better than I thought you would handle it."

Trust me, I'm not handling this well at all. Months of lack of showing emotion is getting to me now. 

"Jessica went back home, to Coldshore. She has friends there and wanted to make it back as soon as she could. She managed to disable the virus, too, thank god. And the Institute members... they were all jailed, the once me managed to catch and find. And um, well..." His voice trailed off. 

"Well what?" I asked. 

He let out a sigh. "You do know that Aidan's father was supposed to be running the Institute, with Alyssa's mom, right?" I nodded, recalling a portion of an earlier conversation. "A lot of the community wanted them thrown in jail, too. Grace was found dead in her mansion, a knife through her heart--" I gasped, the image appearing clear in my mind. "Yeah, I know. Clayton kind of agreed that even if he was on our side, this all could've been prevented if he just closed it down in the first place."

My eyes widened. "But Jordyn--"

"--is living in the palace with me and my siblings until Clayton's sentence is over," Tyson explained. "She talks with her parents on the phone all the time when they can. I think she'll be somewhat okay for the time being."

When he mentions the palace, something else hits me. "You're king now, aren't you?" It's weird because the royal family was anything but royal, and it never occurs to me that they rule the country and basically a lot of the world. 

"Yeah, I guess I am."

"How is that treating you?" I asked, wanting to more just about his life. I couldn't imagine the life he was living as he tried to fix whatever was left of the world.

"Honestly," he started, shaking his head. "I wish I became king under different circumstances. I'm trying to make everything work, at least try to rebuild places where everyone can stay. We already started growing some more food in parts of the country. We're just working slowly, starting from scratch."

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault, Lauren."

"Yes, it is."

"It was the Institute. You are not the Institute."

"What are you going to do to me?" I asked, my voice low. If they jailed the Institute members, my sentence will probably be much worse, maybe longer. For life.

Tyson raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean? Lauren, you're a kid. You didn't have a say in what you were doing. You did most of that against your own will. We aren't going to punish you, Lauren. Like I said, this isn't your fault."

"Is this just because you don't want me in jail?" I asked. Tyson cared about me a little more than a friend, I know for a fact. It would tear him to pieces if I was stuck there, but he actually had the power to keep me out.

"You need to heal, Lauren. A jail cell is not where you can do that."

"I guess you're right," I muttered. "But I wouldn't be able to hurt anyone if I was locked up."

"It would hurt me," he said, confirming my assumptions about him. "It would hurt me more than anything."

I sighed. "Tyson, you're a king. You can't fall in love with someone who killed your dad--" Sometimes I forget I did that. "--and almost wiped away half the population."

I didn't realise the we were both sitting on the bed across from each other. He leans over, cupping my face in his hands. "Lauren, above everything that we are, I will always be your friend. I will always be there for you in that way. I can put everything else aside for you--"

"But you shouldn't be doing that."

"I don't want you to feel like you have no one, Lauren." He looks down at the watch on his wrist. "I have some time before I have to get to my next meeting. What do you want to do?"

I let his words soak in for a bit. He was willing to put aside everything for me. I barely gave him anything in return. My heart feels heavy. It hurts way too much. I crawl closer to him, Tyson wrapping his arms around me. 

And all I do is cry in his arms. He doesn't say anything, just comforts me. That's all I needed. 

- - -

a/n one more chapter and epilogue!