Chapter 35

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"Running pressure check..."

Quixxa fumbled with her thick gloves, trying to get another buckle tightened around her newly dawned spacewalk EVA suit. The inside of the suit gave off puffs of someone else's sweat while Juan helped her double-check everything. Runt, meanwhile, was on the other side of an airlock door.

Quix heard air pumps kick on and start to hiss, pumping the air out of Runt's chamber. He was afraid the damage his suit had taken would break the seals.

"Pressure falling below half," Runt said through his suit's connection. "Still all good here."

The hiss of the air pumps may as well have been Quix's courage leaking out by the gallon. As Juan double-checked the seals around her gloves, she caught a glance of the window beyond Runt. Nothing but abyssal blackness greeted her. And she was going out in it.

What are you thinking. She asked herself, making loose fists out of her bulky gloves.

You're going to die. You're gonna float away and starve to death like in that movie.

"All your seals are good." Juan said, tugging on her gloves again. "Just got the helmet now."

"Zero atmosphere." Runt said cheerily. "Looks like my suit held up. I'm kind of surprised, actually."

Quixxa shot a glance through the window at him.

Yeah, crawl in the vacuum box and test your suit. She thought. No way that could go wrong.

"I'm headed out." Runt said. "I'll be ready for you, Quix."

Quixxa felt her fingertips go numb as she watched Runt palm the hatch release. The door slid open, making a rumble in the ship and nothing more.

Beyond the door, the abyss.

And Runt just floated out into it.

Quixxa watched him go as her courage went along with him.

No freakin' way. She thought, swallowing.

"Okay.... Looks like your suit's all clear. Checks out real well." Juan said. He handed her a helmet and smiled.

"You're ready."

Quixxa looked at the helmet, the only thing that would be separating her from a hard vacuum.

Nope. Definitely not ready.

Juan moved the helmet a little closer to her, forcing her to take it in her hands.

"Alright, looks like the airlock's ready for you too."

He reached around her side and palmed a switch, and a door slid open after a hiss filled it with atmosphere. The locker-lined tube stretched out towards the abyss awaiting her.

"Ok, so, basic safety rules." Juan said, stepping around her and leading her into the airlock. "Don't hit anything, don't go near the thrusters, don't shove away from the ship, stay in visual range of Runt, and stay in radio contact at all times."

Juan hit a switch inside the airlock and looked directly at Quix.

"And whatever you do, don't panic."

Too late...

Juan thumped her on the shoulder.

"You're all good here. Just slip the helmet on and you're spacewalk ready."

Quix held the helmet in both hands and swallowed. She was most certainly not spacewalk ready. Maybe the suit was, but she was a long, long way from it. If her extensive catalogue of movies had taught her one thing, it was just how dangerous space was. She was in no position to test the vacuum.

"Hey, look, I don't know what I'm doing..." Quixxa started to say.

Juan just stepped back once or twice and hit the airlock pad. A door hissed shut between them.

"Don't worry about it." His voice said over the intercom. "It's simple. Runt will show you what's up."

Quix gripped the lip of her helmet a little harder, her stomach roiling.

Quix looked around. Lockers lined both walls of the airlock, and a grey and white door emblazoned with safety warnings and brightly colored stickers loomed at the other end of the lock.

"Runt?" She said loudly.

She knew space silenced everything, but she hoped something inside was transmitting.

She waited, and asked again.

"Can you hear me Runt?" Quix asked.

A little voice inside the helmet replied.

"Yeah, barely. Is your helmet on right?"

Quixxa looked at it and moved it to her head.

"Uh, not yet. I don't know how to get it on."

"Slip it over your head and twist the locking sleeve to the left."

Quix furrowed her brow as she looked at the helmet.

"The... What?"

"The bottom part. Just put it on, I'll come to the glass and help you out in a second."

Quix slid the helmet over her head smoothly and started to toy with it.

A moment later, Hasse's voice came over the intercom.

"Hey, this is the pilot speaking, letting everyone know we're arriving at our destination."

Quixxa tried twisting the helmet again.

"We're coming out of acceleration." Hasse's voice said. "Brace for zero gs in ten, nine..."

Quix's eyes bulged.

Zero gs.

She knew what that meant.

Quixxa grabbed both the bars overhead, veins pressing to the surface of her skin around her neck as she ground her teeth together and looked through her helmet and the glass.

"Runt!" She shouted, her heart pounding in her chest.

She slammed her fist against the glass.

"Runt! My helmet isn't sealed!" She yelled, panic seizing her mind as the countdown continued.

She shouted a few curses and slammed both her hands over her helmets, twisting and squirming, trying desperately to snap it into place.

Runt's helmet appeared in the glass.

"Quix, Quix, listen to me-"

"Three, two..."

Quixxa gasped and held her breath desperately, not knowing what else to do.

She twisted frantically, trying to seat the helmet.

"One. Cutting thrusters." Hasse said. "Welcome to space."

Quixxa ground her teeth together, her heart pounding as the drone in the background ceased.

No no no no no....

Nothing happened.

At least, not yet.

Runt's soothing voice came over the intercom, talking softly.

"Quix, there's still air inside." He said. "We're just weightless."

Quix barely registered the words. Her hands were clamped tight over her helmet as she tried to keep her life-giving atmosphere inside.

She felt something changing.

"No! Noooo! Help!" She shouted to Runt, prying her eyes open and looking at his expressionless visor.

"You're alright, Quix." Runt said. "Look down."

Quixxa's instincts kicked in. he would help her.

She looked down.

Her feet weren't touching.

Neither were her hands.

Or her tail.

She inhaled sharply, her panic stilled for a split second.

"You do know there's still air in zero-g, right?" He asked.

Quixxa looked back out the window. She tried to lean towards him, but only managed to make her body tilt a little. Her boots touched off the floor, and she started to spin upside down.

A jolt of dizziness suddenly caught her. she released her grip as her hands shot out to brace herself.

And with that, her helmet lifted off her head.

She gasped, and slammed it back on as she started to spin faster.

She heard Runt chuckle.

"Quix, calm down. You're alright. You've still got air."

"Then how am I floating?!" she demanded, taking in deep, panicked breaths while she pinned her helmet in place.

"There is still air in zero gravity." Runt said simply. "You're weightless, not airless. It's the hard vacuum out here that's dangerous. You're perfectly fine in the airlock, ok? You're safe."

Quixxa's body started to unwind. She hesitantly lifted the helmet off her shoulders, letting her trust of Runt move her hands.

Nothing happened. She simply turned in the air, hovering and breathless.

"Who told you there was no air in zero-g?" Runt asked, moving across the window a little.

"I saw it..." She hesitated, realizing how flimsy her story was, "I saw it in a movie."

Runt's voice chuckled while the suit outside jiggled back and forth.

"It's not funny!" She said, pulling her helmet away from her body. "I thought I was gonna die!"

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh..." he said, trying to contain his giggles. "But it is a little funny."

Quix squinted at him, and looked back at her helmet.

"How do I get this on?"

"That latch on the side, the red one. Pull it away from the helmet and the slip it on, then twist."

Quix pulled the latch away from the helmet just as the panic finally relented, and the awe started to set in. Inside the airlock, a few items hovered inside lockers while she continued a slow twist in the air. She kicked at the air, barely making herself turn. Her stomach was churning, and her body was demanding that she right herself. But no matter how she turned her head, it seemed like she was falling. She took a long breath, in then out, and looked into the helmet.

"I'm not sure if I like space." She said, slipping the helmet on.

"I'm dizzy. And kinda nauseous."

"It'll pass." Runt assured her, still watching from outside.

Quix seated the helmet and twisted, closing the latch tight. A small heads up flickered to life in the lower left hand of her helmet's line of sight.

"Ok, my helmet just did something." She said. "Does that mean I'm good?"

Runt nodded and started to move out of the way of the door.

"Yep. That control pad by the door, hit the one that says 'depressurize'."

Quix tried to walk. She did nothing but stir the air.

"Oh, huh..." She said out loud, stretching her legs to reach the floor and touch her forward.

"Adjusting to the gravity?"

"Yeah." She said, de-activating the safety and hitting 'depressurize'.

The cabin around her started to hiss.

"Runt?" She asked, her anxiety rising. "You sure this is a good idea?"

"Positive. I'll be right here with you."

She took that as consolation as she braced herself on the bars near her, drifting, trying to keep her stomach calm, and kicking her feet. The lack of gravity had rattled her.

Once the cabin was de-pressurized and the door has slipped open, however, she was far worse than rattled.

Before her, mere inches away, was the abyss.

Her eyes widened, and her heart started to pound again. Her instincts warned her that she could fall, and every fiber of muscle in her body started to tighten. She started to shake her head, making her legs try to walk her backwards. She simply pedaled in the air, staring into the darkness as it stared right back.

"I don't like this, Runt." She said, reaching up and grabbing the bars above the airlock.

Runt drifted back into view. A pair of lights on his helmet shined in her eyes before he shut them off, leaving only the glow of his heads up to light up his face.

"Here. Let me help you out." He said.

"It's your first spacewalk, so we'll take it slow."

Runt pulled himself into the airlock with her and pulled open a locker. From it, he produced a long belt of tough-looking fabric and a pair of clips.

"A tether." He said, handing one end and a clip to her. "It'll keep us together, and in case one of us leaves the hull, we can pull each other in."

Quixxa took the clip, and swallowed. She stared at the massive chunk of metal and fabric in her bulky gloves and swallowed.

"Can that happen?"

"It can," Runt said, snapped the tether to his hip. "But it won't. I'll be right here."

Her instincts calmed, realizing it was him. He wouldn't' put her at risk. She knew that. And her soul knew it too. Her muscles started to relax as she found the same tether point on her suit and snapped the clamp onto it, and secured it.

"Alright. We're all good, but there are a few safety tips. Don't look directly at the sun. Don't jump. Never, ever panic. If you see sharp metal, stay back. Watch your air, and if you fall below fifty percent, start heading back no matter what."

"Anything else?"

Runt grinned.

"Try not to stare."

Quixxa nodded.

"You ready?" Runt asked, pushing himself towards the airlock.

Quixxa hesitated, yet she knew she was in the finest hands.

"Yeah. Let's go."

She pulled herself along the length of the airlock, and reached the door to space. Runt was already the through, the tether leading out the airlock and up, out of her view.

"Come on out, and use the handles above you to get on the hull." Runt said, his soothing voice echoing in her helmet.

The edge of blackness waited for her as she stood at the door. She looked from right to left, her own breath resounding noisily in her helmet as she took in grand, abysmal swaths of darkness. Not a single feature stood out in the darkness, and even the tether seemed to cut off abruptly once it left the shaft of light from the airlock.

"I can't see, Runt." She said.

"There's a control on your left arm for the lights on your hemlet."

Quix activated them, still stuck at the airlock.

Ok, you've got this. She thought, taking deep breaths as her hands tingled with pins. She tightened her grip on the handles, threading her tail through another handle behind her as she leaned out a little and glanced back and forth.

Ok. Ok. You're gonna be ok.

She blew out a long breath as she peeled one of her hands from its anchor and reached into the darkness.

She leaned.

And her hand found an anchor.

Ok. Let's go.

She wrenched her other hand free and grabbed the same anchor, mustering her courage and pulling herself into the black gulf that awaited. Her tail slowly slid from the airlock, and joined the rest of her in the hard vacuum.

She felt something nudge her suit. She looked, and the glow of Runt's helmet was next to her, shutting the airlock.

"It's dark." She commented, looking over her shoulder at the chasm. She turned back towards the ship, her headlamp illuminating a small patch of steel and charred paint.

"No atmosphere to refract light, so it always seems dark up here." Runt said, drifting by her on his way up.

"Follow me. I wanna show you something."

Quixxa inhaled, knowing that as he drifted, her tether was running shorter. She looked up, a beam of light following her as she looked. She saw a long row of handles, a ladder of sorts, leading towards Runt's glow.

"We used to have floodlights up here." Runt said. "Got bumped by a loading barge though, crushed the electrical. We haven't repaired it yet."

Quixxa puffed away in her suit, clinging to each handle for dear life. His voice was calming, but it was practically background noise.

"Ah, here it is." Runt said.

Quixxa didn't dare look up. She kept her eyes on the handles, gripping each one desperately and hauling herself along with upmost caution.

"I love space." Runt said, his voice airy and filled with the affection he brimmed with.

She, however, wasn't feeling warm inside.

"I don't think I like it." She said, stopping when she bumped into Runt.

"It's big, and dark, and it kind of scares m-"

Quixxa looked up, and the words stopped dead in her throat.

Light. A flood of it. Heaven itself was ripped open before her, a searingly bright mote of radiance making her squint and put up a hand to block its rays. And beside that, a huge canvas of browns, reds, ochre and black yawned across the sky like a doorway into rapture. Swirls of grey and splashed of umber glittered across the incandescent orb of New Medina, and faint city lights like stardust bloomed in the dark side of a massive, horizon-spanning world.

Quixxa's jaw fell slack as Runt slid a hand under her arm and pulled her up beside him. Her eyes tried to take it in, once, twice, three times, but she only started over in awe and wonder. Her stomach had calmed, and now, her soul was riled. Before her lay her whole life, the whole planet of New Medina, once the gem of Socotra. A sight to behold. And a home to forget.

She felt tears well up under her eyes, and a blazing knot tie itself in the back of her throat.

"There she is." Runt said, pulling her closer to him. "New Medina. Despite it all, I still think she's beautiful."

Quixxa felt a tear spill over her eyelid and run down her cheek.

"And you know what?" Runt asked, nudging her a little.

"We never have to go back."

He tugged to get her attention, and pointed into the sky, his whole body lit up like an angel's by the sun's radiance.

She followed his finger to a distant mote of light.

"That's Balmut," he said, and moved his finger, "And that's Rhodes. The two big gas giants in Socotra. Between them, Pathmos. That, Quix, is home. And it's not far away now."

She felt another teardrop as she looked at the pair of distant stars.

They seemed close enough to gather up in her arms. She untied the knot in her throat and cleared it.

"Runt?" She said, her voice a little rough.

Her looked at her, his face beaming in his helmet, and those sad blue eyes just blazing with joy.

She smiled at him.

"I take it back." She said quietly.

"I think I like space."

He smiled back.

And for a moment, it seemed as though her problems might simply drift away.

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