"I know that I love you, but let me just say. I don't wanna love you in no kind of way."

Chapter Theme Song: 'Broken-Hearted Girl' by Beyoncé.

🌸**🌼**💕**💓

Chelsy

"Vicky!" I grinned excitedly as my best friend entered through my gate.

She jumped up and down like a happy five-year-old when she spotted me, and I ran over and pulled her into a big hug.

Max shook his head, resting down a jug of orange juice on a large table on the lawn. "She was going to die without you, Vee."

Vicky blushed at him but I doubted he saw it. He was just so blind to see how much she liked him. I felt like punching his head in.

"Come on, Vee," I said, pulling her over to the table. "You hungry?"

So what was the occasion you ask?

It was our little family-friends get-together and this time we settled with a small little dinner on our lawn instead of driving miles to get to the beach. Vicky was back from her grandparents making me feel a lot better about having to see Nathan.

"Maria you're here!" I heard my Mom say exiting the kitchen holding a tray of jerked chicken. I froze, refusing to turn around.

Because Maria meant Nathan was here too.

Holy Cow.

Vicky shot me a knowing look.

I had already called her last night and told her about everything that happened. She knew that Nathan and I were not really on 'talking' terms and how Brad got kicked into the face by him.

Speaking of Brad, ever since the party on Friday night, I had been texting him non-stop and he had been avoiding my messages.

I even tried calling him but that was of no avail.

Something was definitely up with him, I guess he probably thought that Nathan and I were really involved now. It wasn't fair though, Nathan didn't want me but he was also messing up my relationship with Brad.

"Yeah I'm here," Maria replied, and without looking I could tell she was smiling. "Hi everyone."

I turned around and me and Nathan's eyes met for a brief second before Max came over and gave him a high five, pulling his deep blue eyes from mine.

"Awkward as hell," Vicky mumbled as she pulled a chair out from the table to sit.

I sighed. "Tell me about it."

"Chels, could you get Nathan and Maria something to drink? I will go for some more paper plates," My mom asked as she wiped her hands on her apron and went inside.

Just great. She just had to ask me.

I was about to say ask Max but she had already disappeared inside the kitchen.

I walked over to the table that held a large jug of juice and picked up two cups, scooping up some in one and handing it to Maria who stood in front of me, holding Natz.

"Thank you, sweetie."

"Don't mention it, Maria," I responded, mirroring the bright smile she wore. I held Natz's small hands and played with her a little before Maria went to grab a seat.

I returned my gaze to the juice when I heard Nathan's voice.

"Can I have one too?"

I looked at him and he raised a brow.

As usual he looked amazing in his white shirt and blue jeans but the only thing I could do was admire him from afar. Unrequited feelings were the worst.

I cleared my throat. "Yeah. Sure."

I took a cup and poured some drink in. I handed the cup to him and our hands brushed in the process, making a tingly feeling come over me.

Damn it. Behave hormones.

"Thanks," he said before taking a sip, his eyes looked into mine temporarily as he turned to walk away.

I sighed and found a spot beside Vicky offering her a forced smile and she offered one of encouragement.

"Okay, we shall bless the table, right?" My mom commented, running out and resting the paper plates in front of us each.

She crashed beside Maria, and Nathan who was laughing and chatting with Max quickly made his way over and found a spot.

A spot beside me.

I shifted awkwardly and tried not to look in his direction. Vicky was subtly smiling at how weird and discomforted I looked.

The mild and delicious smell of Nathan filled my nostrils reminding me of that day in his room.

He smelled the same and I flashed the thoughts away, my mom was about to grace the food and here I was having ungodly thoughts.

She asked us to hold the person's hands next to us so she could start the prayer.

I hesitated a bit but then Nathan placed his hand in mine and I stiffened, still refusing to even look at him.

Even his hands were sexy. Don't ask me what I mean by that.

His hands were soft and warm, reminding me of how it felt on my legs that day-

Lord forgive me.

I swallowed and Vicky was grinning away like she was enjoying my anxiety.

My mom finished blessing the food and we began eating and chatting.

Maria then looked across at me who was digging into my steak.

"Chels, I heard you have a boyfriend now."

I looked up at her and everyone at the table turned their gazes to me.

"Huh?" I asked, chewing food around in my mouth.

"Well your mom was just telling me," she chuckled. "All grown up now, huh?"

Max hissed. "The guy ain't all that."

My mom laughed. "Are you still overprotective, Max?"

I glanced at Nathan and his face didn't look pleased, for some odd reason.

Was he jealous? I doubted it. Because honestly, he didn't like me that way so he definitely wasn't.

I took the opportunity to try to make him jealous by 'boasting' about Brad despite the fact that I was yet to get a text back.

Well not that he would have cared but whatever, right?

"Yeah he's awesome," I beamed. "I really like him. I think he's my first love. There is absolutely no one else on this earth that can compare to him. He's my everything. I mean he cares for me, he treats me great, he's just phenomenal, one in a million."

Okay maybe I said too much but I hoped Nathan was steaming at the extra compliments I was giving another guy.

Not that he cared but whatever.

"Wow really, let us meet him some time," Maria said with a grin.

Max rolled his eyes and my mom smiled.

I took a glance at Nathan and his teeth were clenched and his eyebrows were furrowed as he kept his glare on his plate of pasta.

My mom looked over at me. "Chels, could you go grab me the ketchup from the kitchen? I think I did the chicken a little too dry."

"It's perfect, I love it, Julia," Maria said as I pushed my chair back and went to fetch what my mother asked for.

When I grabbed it and turned around, Nathan was at the door frame, a hand in his pocket as he leaned against it. "He's your everything?"

He repeated the words I said at the table.

Oooh. So it did have an effect on him?

Sweet.

I fought off my smile and raised a brow. "Yeah. So?"

He narrowed his eyes and I looked away and began moving past him when he gripped my hand and pulled me back in place. "This is the same guy that tried to have sex with you and lashed at you when you didn't, lest you forget."

I pulled my arm from him. "I know," I said. "But at least he wants me."

Nathan clenched his jaw hard and the reaction was satisfying.

But I doubted it was because he loved me. He was probably just territorial.

He thought he was the only one I should want.

He released me then a devilish smirk rose on his face. "Good luck with him. But he won't be able to make you feel the way I did."

My cheeks heated under his gaze and he seemed pleased with the reaction he got from me.

Shit. He always won in the end.

My mouth ran dry and he spoke again. "He won't touch you the way I did...the way only I can."

Damn it, I heard you the first time Nathan and I know that, f*ck don't rub it in.

He smiled wryly and raised his eyebrows in victory before turning away and walking out.

I was a big pile of mush. My whole entire being had been melted into a blushing mess.

Seriously? What was Nathan's problem?

He didn't want me but it was okay to flirt like that?

I gathered my composure and returned outside so it didn't seem like I was just word-effed by Maria's confusing son.

I handed my mom the ketchup and she told me thanks before I crashed around my spot.

Vicky noticed that we were both missing at the same time and she glanced over at me questioningly but my eyes were focused on Nathan who was eating and chatting with Max as if he didn't just talk naughty things to me a second ago in the kitchen.

He was weird as hell.

Instantly my phone buzzed and I took it from my pockets to see that finally, Brad had texted.

*Hey, meet me at my place, eh? We need to talk.

-Brad.

I showed the text to Vicky.

"Talk?" She asked, looking at me with raised eyebrows.

I shrugged. "Maybe it's about that night at the party," I whispered back.

Max looked over at me who was typing up a response to send to Brad.

*Be there soon

-Chels

"What's so interesting?" He asked attempting to poke his head over.

Wasn't he talking with his friend?

Nosey.

I hid the phone to my chest. "None of your business."

My mom was busy talking with Maria so I waved a hand to her.

She brought her gaze to me. "Yes, baby?"

"Mom, Brad texted, can I go meet him?" I asked.

Nathan shot his glare to me.

"Hell no," Max said as if I had asked him anything.

To be honest I spoke that loudly, so Nathan would hear.

"No, eat your food," Max stated.

I honestly didn't recall asking his permission, though.

My mom chuckled. "Max relax, Chelsy is growing up now, we should give her a little freedom but not too much, right?"

Maria smiled, "Yeah, I mean it's cute that she has a little boyfriend."

I stuck my tongue out at Max and he scowled as he rolled his eyes at me.

My mom was a lot more understanding than he was, and she was the parent!

"Okay, sweetie but don't be long, be back before 9, okay?"

I smiled excitedly, but I wasn't really excited, I just wanted Nathan to get that impression.

"Be back soon," I said, shooting Vicky who wore a perturbed expression a quick wink, before pushing my chair back and running inside to get my purse.

❤********❤

I got a taxi after a thirty-minute wait.

While sitting in the backseat, I stared out at the buildings as I passed each one, thinking about....you know who.

Although the sun was setting, I could tell that rain would sprinkle down at any second, thunder rolled and dark clouds settled above.

I finally arrived at Brad's and the rain had started coming down in light sprinkles, but I could tell it would burst at any minute. I jogged up onto the steps of his door and knocked, shifting from one foot onto the next due to how cold I was and how wet I was slowly becoming due to the rain.

No one came to the door.

So I knocked again, blowing into my palms and rubbing them together to create heat.

Finally, the door opened.

But to my surprise, it wasn't Brad.

It was Amanda freaking Stage.

Now, why am I so surprised you may ask?

She was wearing a burgundy robe and I was contemplating on who answers a door in something like that, but I guess she knew I would be there that's why.

I stared at her with wide-eyes. "Wh-what are you doing here?"

She flashed her hair from her eyes and offered the most plastic smile I had ever seen.

"I was the one who texted," she responded smugly.

I blinked at her. "What on earth are you talking about?"

"Listen, Miss. Goody-two-shoes, Brad and I are dating now, as a matter of fact we have been dating behind your back for quite some time."

I couldn't believe my ears and I couldn't believe her words. Was I being played this whole time? In truth, I really wanted to pull her by her hair but I was too astonished to, so I froze on the spot, offering just a: "What?"

"You remember that time when you were to meet him at Kab's Burger?"

Of course I did, it was our first date and he had offered an excuse a day after that his mom was sick that's why he didn't make it.

"Well, he was with me. See, Brad and I were in a secret relationship, but we weren't really committed. We would hook up from time to time. It's too bad you didn't know that."

"But-I..." I was speechless. I took a minute to process her words before attempting to speak again. "I thought you liked Nathan."

"I do, but Brad just made our little 'hook up' official last night so I decided to agree, hoping it would make you feel like shit, which it does. So I won. I have always hated you Chelsy Holmes and it feels so great to take something that belongs to you."

Wow, the extent that someone would go just to try to be even with you.

I swallowed and took a deep breath, my brain struggling to comprehend the reality of the situation.

I wasn't that much hurt, because he wasn't Nathan. But I was still offended that he took me for a fool.

Suddenly I heard Brad's voice from behind. "Who is it, Babe?"

Babe? Wow, well that was confirmation.

His face appeared over her shoulders and he gasped with wide eyes when he saw me standing there as if he had seen a ghost. "Oh shit, Chelsy, what are you doing here?"

I clenched my jaw, just staring at him with an angry face and refusing to even utter a word because the only ones I could possibly think of were fuck you.

"Mandy, please, wait inside, okay?" he asked, holding her shoulders and gently ushering her in while she offered a sinister and victorious smile in the process.

He stepped out and closed the door behind him and I just stood there, glaring at him.

He analysed how soaked I was from the rain, which I was still standing in by the way but somehow I couldn't feel the drops. Maybe because I was numb from all the built-up anger.

He reached for my arm. "Chelsy, you're wet, please come insi-"

I stepped back from his reach and even more into the now pouring rain.

"Did you really play me, Brad? With Amanda Stage of all people? You know how much she hates me."

He sighed. "Chelsy, listen-"

"I don't want to hear it, you're an ass, how could you do this to me? She said you guys were secretly together for quite some time, so behind my back, you guys were actually having sex and you lied that your mom was sick. I mean how could you lie about your mother's health? Who does that? You're so heartless and cold, Brad Pinsley."

He ran a hand over his face and let out a breath. "Are you going to judge me right now?"

I narrowed my eyes at him.

"You're a hypocrite, Chels."

Wow hold up, this was a total switch in characters. I was upset with him. He cheated. So how on earth was I the hypocrite?

"Me?" I pointed at myself. "I am the hypocrite?"

"Yeah you are, pretending to be a saint when in truth, you're f*cking Sharles."

Oh no he did not.

I gasped. "Don't you dare try to disrespect me. Nathan and I-"

"Are nothing right? Yeah you say that all the time but yet still he kicked me in the face Friday night, for you. And you're going to tell me that nothing is going on between you two? Chelsy, you starved me, so I had no choice but to seek it elsewhere. I want sex, and you're not giving it to me. Amanda is willing, so why not go for it, huh?"

I was speechless as I stared at him in total bewilderment.

Was this really the guy I had a crush on since my first year of high school? Wow, this is how wrong you could be about a person.

"You're nothing but a selfish jerk, you know that Brad? I can't believe I liked you."

"I was patient enough Chels and you're 'baby steps' are really annoying me."

"You obviously didn't like me enough if you can't understand."

"Think whatever you want. I thought you would be a lot easier to get with since you were friends with Sharles but I won't waste my time trying to get in your jeans as if it's some gold. I have no time for this, my girlfriend whom I don't have to beg to sleep with me, is waiting inside for me."

I nodded, stepping back. "Okay, have a good life."

I turned away and left, not looking back and not shedding a single tear.

I was over Brad, had been for quite some time now.

I didn't need him.

I was going to be alright.