"tuck." i shake him awake with one hand and brush hair out of his face with my other.

"where are we? are we at the museum?" he sits up and looks out the window. "a-an airport? what for? i thought we were driving to charlottetown."

i take his hands which had begun to sweat. "we are, don't worry. i'm just dropping off my parents so they can go back to work soon. is that okay?"

"yeah." everything about him says otherwise. his voice is trembling and he looks paralyzed. despite that, he gets out and helps my mom carry every piece of her luggage, his hands shaking the whole way."does that mean you're flying home alone?"

"yes?"

he runs a set of stressed fingers through his hair. without a word, he turns and stalks to the ticket counter. i figure he needs a break and let him leave.

by the time my parents' bags have been weighed, he's back. "what was that?"

he hands me some papers. they're tickets back to ottawa with the same flight time as mine. 

"i never make the same mistake twice." he's still shaking, but at least he looks sure.

in a matter of minutes, tucker had gone and faced his biggest fear, for me and for himself.

i smile at him and kiss the corner of his mouth. "i love you," i tell him for the first time in years.

tucker and i were never one for the romantic "i love you's". 

"life is short. say 'i love you'" tucker would always remind me. he was a wise kid.

our "i love you's", although mine had romantic connotations now, were ways to say "thank you", "i'm proud of you" or "i'm here for you."  it wasn't about romantic or sexual attraction, ever.

love, by definition, is 'an intense feeling of deep affection'  and so why should it be so reserved? we said it freely and openly.

he grins. "i love you too."