E I G H T E E N

Background color
Font
Font size
Line height

I shot up in bed. The darkness of my bedroom filled the space. There was the tiny blinking red light of our TV, the white numbers of our digital wall clock—2:39 A.M.­ But Polk was gone, and with him left the Void. It was just me, my reality, and the blankets covering my legs.

Glancing down at my hands, I unclenched my fists. I was covered in sweat. Judging by my side, I had thrashed, kicked, and who knew what else. But looking at Clara, she looked so peaceful, unbothered. Maybe I wasn't that bad; it just felt more horrible than it was.

Still, that didn't change how I felt. My heart hammered in my chest. I was awake, but I was still gasping. Glimpses of Polk's face flashed in my mind. And what he said echoed:

"Roger, it would be a shame if everyone knew who you really are."

Swinging my legs over the side of the bed, I slowly made my way over to our bathroom. The sound of the lights coming to life when I walked inside echoed in our studio apartment. And when I looked in the mirror, at my reflection, I heard my heart echo with it.

"I said are, because it's not like you really changed. You did the same thing during the Digital War, right?"

I touched my neck, my face. My veins were bold, pulsing red under my skin. When I touched them, they were tender. If I pressed, they hurt. Hissing, I leaned against the bathroom sink and took a closer look at myself.

"What the fuck...?" I'd been with Malfunctioners since Codes were created. I was a Code, I knew all of our ailments. Right? I had to. It was my job. These were my people.

"Swapped sides, looked out for yourself?"

Dipping my head forward, I groaned and squeezed my eyes shut. It was a dream, yes, but what he said held weight, didn't it? It felt like it did. I'd gone through my memories, replayed the moments in my first life where I looked out for myself, tried to put my family first, and swamped the sides of the war. But I had a good reason. The war was done, and I couldn't be on the losing side. I was done being lied to, tricked, and manipulated.

And yet, as I lifted my head to look back at my sickly reflection, I thought of what Polk said. He mentioned the Digital War, the months I spent living inside of Clara's head. I hadn't swapped sides then. I was a Code, by name, but nothing else. Clara had broken my program, undid my chains. When I became aware, I only knew one side. Her side.

So, I couldn't have swapped...

I had no memories of it...

"What does this mean?" I whispered, pushing away from the mirror. I touched my neck again and felt tears burn in my eyes. "And why does this hurt so much?"

|||

The morning sun broke through our window, but by the time it touched Clara's face I'd dressed, kissed her cheek, and quietly left our apartment. I knew she'd call me as soon as she realized I wasn't home, but I needed to take the long way to work. To clear my head.

And make a call.

Halfway to Provincial Hall, I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and called Xerses. If he wasn't at the hall already, I knew he would be. And if he was, he'd be ready to listen.

"Rog?" To my surprise, Xerses was tired on the other line. "We don't go in for another hour. Are you okay?"

I stopped at the next intersection. Cars waited patiently for the streetlights to change. Or was it for me to cross?

"Were you still sleeping?" I asked Xerses as I focused on the time in the corner of my eyes. "I thought you'd be awake by now. Sorry if I woke you up, man."

One of the cars honked at me. Looking at the driver and the impatience on his face, he was waiting for me. I was supposed to cross. Taking the cue, I quickly hurried to the other side, waving apologetically at him.

"No, I um," Xerses sniffed and groaned sleepily on the other line, "I just had a long night. I needed to try and figure things out."

Once my feet hit the curb, I turned and looked back at the streetlights. They changed. The cars sped away. "Oh, okay."

"Yeah, but," I heard movement, rustling, Xerses moving around his house, "if you're good then it's okay, right? I mean, we got time to figure this out and—"

"I don't think I'm okay," I said honestly as I continued towards Provincial Hall. "I had a dream last night, X."

"Oh?" Xerses cleared his throat. "About?"

"Polk." I walked faster. As soon as I said his name, I felt like someone could be listening. Why was I so afraid? "He was in my dream... talking to me."

Xerses was silent for a second. When I reached the next intersection, clearly seeing the Hall up ahead, he finally spoke. "It could've just been a dream, Rog," he said. "You were pretty shook yesterday and—"

"He knew things."

"Yeah," Xerses laughed, but he sounded nervous. "It's a dream in your head, so of course, dream him would know things."

Him. Xerses was avoiding the name. Was Eric nearby? Had she not left for work, either?

I stopped in front of the Hall. I could've walked up the stone steps, but the sight of protestors sitting out front had me frozen. What I was going to tell Xerses, what if they heard me? They already didn't like me, the Codes as a whole. We were the demons in their world; digital monsters interfering with their existence.

I took two steps back, closer to the street, and dropped my voice to a whisper just as one of the protestors focused on me. "X, I woke up last night like I'd... I don't even know." I turned, so no one could see my confusion. "I couldn't breathe, my heart was racing, and my veins were going to pop out of my neck."

"Wait, what?" I heard someone fall on Xerses' end. A cup? It wasn't glass. "After that dream?"

No shit... "Yes," I hissed, glancing back at the stairs. "I'll tell you more about it after you get here."

"Okay," Xerses said.

"And hurry up." The sound of the call ending echoed in my ear before I pocketed my phone. My eyes were stuck on the protestor who wouldn't look away from me. Slowly eating his sandwich, he chewed and watched. When I turned and faced the stairs, he narrowed his gaze. If it were a normal day, before the protestors, before my trips down my digital memory lane, I would've retaliated; I've done it before.

Yet, as I walked up the steps of Province Hall, I looked away. He had every reason to dislike me, all of them did. I didn't want to give them more of a reason, they had enough. And if Polk released our sealed data to the public; he didn't have to say the threat for me to feel the heat of it.

"Hey!"

My hand touched the main entrance door as a voice called out to me. I waited for a second, hoping I was wrong. But when it came again—"Hey!"—I turned around. I locked eyes with the protestor as he finished his food.

I didn't address him. Only nodded.

"Don't think we're going to stop doing this," he said, pointing at me. "We're going to keep going until we get what we want."

What did they want? Codes off the streets? Removal of our civilian rights? Sure, I knew it had to be it. It was all over the news, within every media outlet. Shit, they even made articles and sent them to everyone's emails as spam.

They called themselves Rebels.

If only they knew who the original Rebels truly were...

"You heard me?" he shouted as the door reacted to my touch and opened for me. "We won't stop!"

Looking into the lobby, at my fellow Codes living and working as a normal person would, I bit my tongue. A part of me reminded myself to hold back, to think of what I'd just told myself—the protestors didn't need another reason to hate me.

But when I looked into Laura's eyes as she waved from the front desk, I let go. Keeping quiet went against everything I believed in, everything I was.

I can't bend for them.

I turned back to the protestor just as I stepped into the lobby, just beyond the doors. His finger remained pointed. His chest rose and fell with heavy breaths.

Smirking, I watched the doors slowly close in front of me and said loud enough for him to hear, "And neither will we."


You are reading the story above: TeenFic.Net