Let's recap for a moment the things I learned during my study session with Josh shall we?

1- Josh has Ninja Turtle pajama pants...and I have pink flamingo pajama pants and as everyone knows...pink goes good with green.

2- muscles

3- Diabetes gives not a single fuck if you have important studying to do or if you are doing said important studying with a very cute boy with muscles. She is a vapid attention seeking whore who is hell bent on destroying my life. Not one but TWO putrid glasses of pulpy orange hell I had to drink just to get that bitch off my back.

4- Econ sucks ass. To be fair this was knowledge I already had prior to the study session so I'm not entirely sure if it should be included in this list but what the hell.

5- Did I mention muscles?

6- He stole my Cheetos! I have yet to determine what his punishment will be but let it be known, it will be severe.

7- Josh has this little scar above his lip, its small and I never noticed it until he kissed me today, there is a tiny ridge of scar tissue on the inside of this lip that coincides. I don't know why I find it to be so attractive. Perfection is boring, every mark he has comes with a story, something that shaped him into the person he is today and I find beauty in his little flaws.

8- Even with all of my diabetic malfunctions, my inability to comfortably sit, Josh's sneak attack kissing session and what seemed like a never ending stream of my brothers not-so-casually checking in on us I managed to get through all of my study guides and I am feeling very confident that I will ace my finals. Except for econ...it will just never make sense to me.

-5:45-

I shoved the remaining books into my backpack and let out a very satisfied sigh. Josh was a frickin' tutoring genius.

And an amazing kisser

I sighed dreamily unable to keep a smile from tugging at the corners of my mouth as I touched my lips remembering his kiss. Josh was so sure of himself when it came to kissing, there was no hesitation or obvious internal freak out unlike myself. I was always worried I was doing it wrong.

Was I too spitty?

Where should my tongue be?

Should I be moving my tongue too or just let him do his thing?

WHAT DO I DO WITH MY HANDS?

All questions I would have to address at a later time when I wasn't being stared at awkwardly by my brother.

"Are you low?"

Tossing my overly loaded backpack to the floor beside the front door I turned to my brother and cocked a brow. "No, why would you assume I was low?"

"Your eyes were all glazed over and you were staring off into space. We leave for Kev's in five minutes and you are not wearing those flamingo pajama pants to dinner, go change." I begrudgingly obeyed running upstairs to change into more acceptable dinner attire and was excited to find my butt had returned to a normal color and no longer seemed to be harboring the heat of the sun. Still tender and oddly itchy like a sunburn but totally bearable, my butt had survived the wear out.

Thank you baby Jesus

6 pm

"CeCe!" Maddie squealed running toward me at full speed the second I entered the front door and nearly sending the bowl of potato salad I was carrying flying.

"Hey there munchkin, where is Ellie?"

Maddie smirked. "She's in trouble."

"Madeline Elise, time out right now," Dani scolded from the kitchen pointing toward the stairs.

"I didn't do anything!" Maddie whined stomping her foot at the injustice. "I just said she was in trouble!" Dani swiftly grabbed Maddie by the arm and led her to the staircase sitting her on the 5th stair.

Ah yes...the 5th stair. As far back as I can remember the 5th stair in the Jonas house was the designated time out spot. If Mom sent you to time out, the 5th stair is where you were to go...not the 3rd or the 4th...the 5th. The dreaded stair had seen so much cheek time after four kids that there was a legit worn out area on the varnish.

"It wasn't what you said it's how you said it," Dani continued to scold pointing a finger in Maddie's direction for emphasis. "I have had it with your hateful attitude today. If you move from that stair before your time is up, your sister won't be the only one getting a spanking. Do you understand me?"

Maddie's lip jutted out in full pout. "Yes Ma'am."

Yikes! Pregnant Dani did.not.play.

Joe, Nick, and I shared a knowing glance between us as if we were all simultaneously suffering from the same childhood flashback. No way she would stay on that stair. I knew it, Nick knew it, Joe knew it...Hell, I'm fairly certain that was what prompted my mother to make the 5th stair the time out spot in the first place. No child in the history of forever willingly stayed in time out. Let's just pretend for a second that you are put in time out right now; time out rules dictate that the offender must sit in time out for the same number of minutes as they are in years of age. Imagine that number in your head. Ok, now being 100% truthful, could you sit (not talking...because if you do the time starts over) and not moving from that spot for the entire duration of minutes WITHOUT the entertainment of any phone or other electronic device to pass the time? Highly unlikely, most of us can't even use the bathroom anymore without taking our phone. Not to mention, IT'S STAIRS, they are meant to be slid down on your butt. There is almost some weird gravitational pull that occurs when a child sits on a staircase.

That's not petulance people...that's science!

Dani turned on her heels her lips pursed together in frustration as she made her way back toward the kitchen scooping the bowl of potato salad from my hands en route. "This looks delicious," she cooed her face immediately softening as she eyed the homemade side dish before placing it on the counter next to an array of burger condiments and setting a timer on the microwave for 7 minutes. "Can you guys help me take all this stuff outside to the table? Also, can you grab the salad and some dressings, they are in the fridge. OH! Also the salad tongs and serving spoons for the sides...and paper plates," she rambled loading her arms with various condiments from the counter and heading out the back door toward the patio. "And buns! Bring buns!"

"What is she yelling about?" Kevin asked exiting his office and cocking a brow in my direction. I shrugged.

"Something about your buns." Kevin shook his head before loading his arms with items from the counter and heading out the door, Nick and Joe quickly followed suit grabbing the items Dani had rambled off before joining them in the backyard leaving Cat and I standing awkwardly in the kitchen.

"How many more minutes?" Maddie whined eyeing me through the spindles on the staircase like a prisoner through steel bars. I turned to find her sitting on the very bottom step.

SEE! Science!

"No talking! If they hear you they will start your time over," I whisper yelled. "And get your little butt back on the 5th stair before your mom or dad catches you." Maddie quickly obeyed making cheek touchdown on the 5th step a mere two seconds before Kevin walked back through the door.

Kevin eyed Maddie knowingly, "You have 5 minutes left Madeline, instead of badgering CeCe about how much longer you have, I suggest you use the time wisely and change your hateful attitude."

My pint sized niece rested her elbows on her knees and plopped her chin into the palms of her hands with a huff. "Yes Sir."

Yup, fairly certain my oldest brother is a wizard, there is just no other explanation for his impressive level of psychic ability.

He nodded in acknowledgement before turning his eyes to me, "Quit aiding the felon and help Dani please, we have entered the part of her pregnancy where she starts to lose her mind over the tiniest of things and I have had my fill of unruly females today."

"Totally telling Dani you called her unruly..."

"Go right ahead," Kevin said throwing his arms up in mock surrender. "I am couching it anyway after she asked me to make her a cheeseburger on toast for breakfast and then had a mental breakdown on me when I brought her a cheeseburger on toast because and I quote...the toast was toasty."

"The toast was toasty?"

My oldest brother brought his hand to the back of his neck rubbing it in frustration. "Yes, apparently what she meant was that she wanted her bread to TASTE like toast...but not actually BE toasted because then it gets crusty and it reminds her of eating sand and when I told her that I could not make her bread simply taste like toast without toasting it she became irate."

Pregnancy hormones- 1/ Kevin- 0

I really did try not to bust out laughing.

I was not successful.

Kevin however barely noticed. My eldest brother's glare had already returned to Maddie, now sitting on the second stair. Before she had time to register that she was busted he closed the space between them grabbing her arm as she scrambled to return to the 5th stair. "Go wait for me in the office," Kevin instructed his tone sharp popping her on the butt once for emphasis.

"Nooooooooooo," Maddie whined her free hand flying back to cover her butt from any further smacks. "I won't move again, I promise."

"What did your mother tell you would happen if you moved from the stair?"

Maddie let out a defeated whine. "That I'd get spanked."

"And did you move?"

"Yes but..."

Kevin nodded before cutting her off, "Go wait for me in the office." He left no room for further argument as he led my pint sized niece almost all the way to the office before releasing her arm and allowing her to begrudgingly stomp the remainder of the way in on her own. "Would anyone else like to blatantly break rules or call me an asshole? I still have two corners left unoccupied...they come with a free spanking."

Uh...no and thank you.

"I'm good thanks." I promptly declined. "Is that why Ellie is in trouble? She called you a...uh...wow ...where did she learn that?"

Kevin's eyes narrowed in my direction, "I assume she picked it up at school, I swear the amount of lackadaisical parenting that goes on in this town is unreal, either because they are too busy to bother or too concerned with being a friend more than a parent. There are twenty-two kids in Ellie's class and a good half of them I guarantee have not been disciplined a day in their life. Eventually a handful of them will probably wind up attending Chilton where their unruly asses will end up over my desk time and time again because they completely lack respect for their elders and accountability for their actions."

"Well, maybe Ellie didn't know it was a bad word," I defended. "Maybe she heard one of those other kids say it and didn't really understand what..."

"She knew," Kevin said cutting off my defense, "She came home last week and asked Dani point blank what it meant and she nearly had heart failure. She knows that it is a very bad word and she is not to say it...ever. She was already pushing her luck today, she had been told twice by Dani to pick up a Barbie mess she had made upstairs and chose to ignore her so I told her I was going to go up there and put everything I found on the floor into a trash bag and donate it to which she replied, 'If you do that then you are an asshole.'"

My mouth fell open, I was shocked...and impressed.

Ellie had lady balls

"Go help Dani please, Nick or Joe can start the grill and the girls and I will join you all shortly."

Chapter End Notes:

Holy Shit.

She Updated.

What do I do now with my life.

Hello lovies, I have missed you. How have you been? Life since we last spoke has been bananas. Cancer, my mom's death, severe depression, my eldest coming out as trans,graduations,college,then there was that whole apocalypse thing in 2020...lost jobs,new jobs, more cancer... needless to say I needed some me time to sit and detox and WRITE. Looking forward to getting back to this, I cannot promise an update schedule but I.Will.try.