47

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AN: this is a double update so please read chapter 46 first!

"Just wait," I rushed out, because Chase about to shut the door on me.

"Just wait," I repeated practically begging him with my stare. "Let me explain, please."

Chase looked at me with hurt in his eyes, I didn't have to wonder what the emotion swirling through his brown globes were. I couldn't blame him for not wanting to speak to me, I didn't fault him for not wanting to hear me out. After all, if the roles were reversed, I'd be devastated.

It felt like an eternity had happened before he answered me, but it was really only a couple of seconds before he did. My chest was thumping with every one though, the idea of him not letting me explain what happened haunting every breath I took.

"Okay," he seemed hesitant, and again- I couldn't blame him. "Come on."

I breathed a sigh of relief that he was willing to hear me out, as I stepped into his house. His large family was gathered in the living room. Their eyes all turned towards me as I walked past them. Smiles on their faces as they each performed a sign of greeting. I found it hard to smile back at them, however. His mom opened her mouth as if she was about to speak, but I suppose the look on Chase's face convinced her otherwise.

Chase led me up the stairs, and with each step I took, a new emotion took hold inside of me. Nervousness, embarrassment, pain, fear... just to name a few.

He didn't look back toward me as he pushed open his bedroom door, he only stepped to the side once he was in the room. I snuck past him, the silent awkwardness of the situation even louder now that we were alone.

Chase closed the door beside me, and I watched him as I waited for him to sit. He didn't though, he stood simply still. That wasn't the worst part, though. The worst part was that he didn't look at me for even a second.

"Say what you came here to say," he mumbled, staring down at his feet.

I took a breath, the pain he was radiating seeping through me. "That video isn't what it seems, Chase."

"Don't try to spare my feelings, Indie," Chase said instantly, but his words weren't rude. They were just sad. "Please don't lie, I can't take it. I get it. I understand why you would want a guy like him, I just... I don't know."

Chase's voice trailed off, but when I was about to answer, he spoke again. "I just don't understand. Did I misunderstand what was happening between us? What about last night? I thought... I thought it was special."

"Chase, it was special. Listen to me, please, I don't like Brock," I said the words that I finally thought would fix the situation.

To my surprise, Chase's face didn't change as he looked up at me, meeting my eyes at last. His eyes were narrowed, they were as sharp as his words.

"I said don't lie to me, Indie," Chase was pleading with me. "Please don't, I can't take it."

"I'm not lying," I began to feel that annoyance I felt with Bella surge back into my veins.

Why didn't anyone believe me?

"I'm not lying, Chase," I repeated, shaking my head. "Don't accuse me of being a liar."

"I saw the video," Chase fired back. "I heard the words you said to him. Please, just leave. I can't... I can't, Indie. Please understand me when I say, I can't go through this."

"You?" I asked him incredulously. "You can't go through this? What about me? Do you think I can go through this?"

Chase looked stunned at my words, like he hadn't expected them.

"I'm not lying to you, Chase. I don't like Brock, and I don't want Brock. But you know what, you don't get to treat me as if I am a liar, even if I did. We aren't dating, you're not my boyfriend, we're not exclusive. You've never even told me you liked me, you've never spelled out the way you feel about me," I felt my voice rising as I said the words, but I didn't care.

"And, considering you were head over heels in love with some other girl just weeks ago, it's a bit fucking rich coming from you. You're not the one who's had to wonder about her, about the girl you've written all your songs for and the girl you've told your friends about. I have! I've had to be insecure and jealous while waiting for you to make up your mind!" I finished finally, drawing in a deep breath once the words left my mouth.

Chase looked like I had slapped him, and maybe I had- with my words. His eyebrows were drawn together, a frown on his face. He was still, impossibly still, until he raised his hands and ran them through his hair in what looked like frustration.

"You don't get it," he let out, and he moved from where he had been glued on the floor. He walked sharply over to his desk, opening one of the drawers and routing around in it.

"You really don't fucking get it, Indie," he muttered, his back turned towards me. I was left more confused by every word he spoke. "How could you not get it? You don't get it."

"No," I huffed, not understanding his rambling. "I don't get it, Chase, so why don't you fucking tell me, for once!"

"It's you!" Chase yelled as he spun around from his desk. "It's you, Indie! It's always been you!"

I felt my face freeze at his words, and the emotion in them. He pushed something into his hands, and I felt my fingers grasp around the object. I didn't look however, I was too busy staring at his face and trying to understand the words he was screaming at me.

"You're the girl, Indie. You're the girl I wrote the songs about, you're the girl I told my friends about it. It's you, it's always been you," his voice had fallen, it was softer now, but it held desperation in it. "Look at the picture."

I let my eyes trace his face for a second longer, before I dropped them to the picture he had pushed in my hands.

It looked familiar, the landscape in the picture. I tried to push through my brain until I realized what it was. It took me a second to find that information, because it's been years since I've seen it.

It was the park by my old middle school. It looked to be fall, the trees were beginning to turn red. The sun was filtering into the picture in a way that created rainbows and glitter in the air. I was confused as to why he was showing it to me. But then... I saw it.

My face was partially in the frame. It was my face, but I looked different. I was younger, years and years younger, practically still a child. My hair was fanned around me, it looked like I was running, but there was a smile on my face. I was looking at someone, and the blonde hair told me who it was instantly.

It was Isla, our hands were joined together, and although her face wasn't in the frame, only her hair, it suddenly jogged back the memory of that day.

Our first week as friends. We had played tag in the park, and it was the day we realized we both liked the same band. I remembered her laughs as we ran, the feeling of her hand in mine as she pulled me along with her.

It was the beginning of Isla and I.

"I took that picture my first day in this town," Chase's voice brought me back to reality. I looked up to him, he looked pained at the sight of me holding the picture.

"Your laugh was like bells," he said, and it looked like he was lost inside the memory himself. "I couldn't get you out of my head, Indie. You were the most beautiful thing I ever laid eyes on, and you still are. I haven't been able to get you out of my head for the last six years."

"It's always been me?" I asked, as if I needed the clarification once again.

"Yes," Chase told me. "So, I understand what you're saying, I do. I know the pain that comes with seeing the person you love with someone else. I can't do it, Indie. I can't watch you be with Brock and me at the same time."

"Chase," I shook my head. "I wasn't talking about Brock in the video," he opened his mouth like he was about to protest, but I continued anyways. "I was talking about you."

"What?" He asked quickly. "You were talking about me?"

"Yes," I let my arms drop, though I clutched the picture tightly in my fingers.

"How can I believe you?" He asked me, his voice small.

"Because," I sighed. "Maybe it hasn't always been you..." I walked over to him, laying my free hand on his chest.

"But Chase," I continued, "It's you now. It's only you now."

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