If he came with a face I had yet to see, with a voice I had yet to hear, I would still know him. Even if the years separated us, I would still feel him. Like Lang Leav wrote. Somewhere between the sand and stardust, through every collapse and creation, there is a pulse that echoes of us.

We were stardust, him and I.

He was sitting in the same spot we sat the first time he brought us here, looking up at the stars. I walked towards him and as I got closer I could see the tears that were streaming down his cheeks. He was in pain. As I got closer, it didn't take him much to realize that he wasn't alone anymore. He turned his gaze towards me and I could see that he wasn't expecting to see me. "Ev, what are you doing here?"

"O'Connor called me," I reply as I sat down right next to him. "He told me what happened and was worried because he didn't know where you ran off to."

"I just wanted to be alone," Connery says looking down. "The memories, they brought back so much pain, it was all too much. All at once."

"It's years of painful memories," I say. "How could you ever forget?"

"He had nine years, nine whole years." Connery sighs. "Why now?"

"Did he tell you the reason why he showed up?" I ask.

"Yes," Connery replies. "He said that he wanted to make things right between us but I wasn't having it. He had his chance Ev, he is nine years too late for that."

"He dared to call beating mom up over and over again while you drowned yourself in whiskey bottles a mistake. A mistake. A mistake is something you make once, but when you do it repeatedly without caring, that's a choice."

"What did you say to him when told you it was a mistake?" I ask.

"I told him to keep his sorry excuses for himself. After all of these years, that was the best thing that he could come up with. And then he goes on to tell me that he will always be my father. He stopped being my father the moment I walked out the door with my mom." Connery pauses. "I don't know what he wants to do with me anyway, he has a little perfect family of his own. He didn't feel the need to look for us back then, he doesn't need us now."

"It breaks me Ev, the fact that his own family wasn't a reason enough for him to get his shit together. He found a reason to get his shit together after we left, we weren't enough for him. We weren't but his new family was." I didn't know what to say, so I did what I knew would speak more than any word I could say. I embraced him and he broke down.

"I don't have all of the answers you're looking for right now, they're answers that only he can give you," I say as I place my hands on Connery's cheeks. "But know that you didn't lose anything the day you walked out that door. What you left behind wasn't the dad you had always known, he wasn't the dad he once promised he would always be Connery. He was the one that ended up losing because you and Emma turned out to be one of the best people I have ever had the chance to meet in this lifetime. And he knows that he realizes that."

Connery looks deeply into my eyes. "After all I've put you through, why are you still here?"

"It's you. In a thousand lifetimes, in a hundred different ways Connery, it's you. It will always be you." I smile at the broken yet beautiful boy that was sitting in front of me. "I don't know how to explain it really because when your heart knows, it knows. And there's nothing else you can do but trust it."

Connery smiles weekly at me as he runs his hands down my cheeks. "I don't deserve you, any of you."

"Let me be the judge of that okay?" I tell Connery and he nods.

"I'm sorry, for not standing up for you that day in court, for blaming and treating you like you were the one who ruined my family, and for acting like a total dick. I'm sorry I couldn't see that I wasn't the only one breaking. I let my pride blind me." Connery pauses. "I thought I had lost you, the night of the party."

"Because of Sèbastien or because of the fight we had?" I ask.

"Both," Connery replies.

"You never did, I always clung on to the hope that someday things could go back to the way they were between us," I say. "And Sèbastien was just a great friend, I did try to give it a chance, but he just wasn't you."

"And I never started to fuck around with Inez again. Ever since you and I got closer, I didn't feel the need to be with her. I just told you that out of spite, I wanted to hurt you just as bad as you hurt me." Connery pauses. "But I have to be honest with you, I want to start things the right way this time Ev. No more secrets. And no more lies."

I nodded but I couldn't help but think of what was the thing he had to tell me. "Inez flew to Nebraska with me this past weekend."

"Did something happen between you guys?" I ask. I had a feeling that I wasn't going to like the answer, but whatever the answer was, I didn't care. He was being honest with me. And just like him, that's all I've ever wanted.

"Yes," He replies. "We were in the hotel room and I came across your pictures from the wedding. My date, biggest cheerleader, and dance partner of the night. You wrote. At that moment, I just wanted to feel something, so after months I gave in. I tried to fill in the void you left with Inez and I regretted it. Because no matter how hard I tried, Inez could never fill the void because it was a void that was never hers to fill in the first place. She's not you and she never will be."

"It's okay Connery, that doesn't change anything for me." It didn't. We weren't together when it happened and that was something he could've kept for himself but despite how I could've reacted he still told me. He wanted to do things the right way and there's no better way to do it than to build back up the trust that was once broken. "Thank you for telling me."

Connery and I sat down by the rocks looking up at the stars for about an hour before we decided to grab something to eat. If he was going to make it out alive tomorrow at practice he needed food in his system before he went to bed tonight. He was in no condition to drive, so after a good fifteen minutes of arguing about it, we decided to call O'Connor so he could pick up Connery's car. Now, the one thing that we did agree on was grabbing something to eat at Alejandro's. Connery's safe spot wasn't that far from Alejandro's and thankfully, when we got there it wasn't packed.

While we were waiting in line and Connery was battling on what he should order I realized that I had never brought Connery to Alejandros's before. And since I know the best empanadas from here, I told Connery I would order for him. "Parcerita, me alegra muchísimo verte por aca. ¿Como va todo?"

Alejandro greeted with his Colombian accent. "Me alegra verte a ti tambien Alejandro. Todo esta muy bien, vistes que logramos arrestar al muchacho?"

Alejandro nods. "Lo pude ver en las noticias, me lleno de mucha felicidad el saber que se esta haciendo justicia por esas niñas."

"No hemos completado el objetivo todavía, pero vamos en camino." I smile.

"Eso es lo importante," Alejandro smiles. "Veo que vienes acompañada."

Alejandro points at Connery who was currently answering a text message. "Si, el es Mateo."

"Es la primera vez que vienes acompañada Everest, puedo ver la felicidad en tus ojos que hace mucho tiempo no veía." Alejandro pauses. "¿Son novios?"

I smile. "No, todavía. Pronto lo seremos. Estar con el me llena de mucha felicidad, es un buen muchacho."

"Me alegra, mereces eso y mas mi niña." Alejandro smiles. "¿Que ordenaras hoy? ¿La misma orden de siempre?"

I nod. "Si, dame dos ordenes de empanadas de enchiladas con pollo por favor. Acuérdate que las mías son sin queso. Con dos botellas de agua. Gracias Alejandro."

"A la orden siempre parcerita, que te las disfrutes."

I payed for our order and once it was ready, we sat down at one of the tables. "I ordered us empanadas de enchiladas con pollo, out of everything in the menu, these are the best. Have you ever tried them before?"

"I haven't, but I bet they taste incredible. You do have an impeccable taste after all." Connery winks and I shake my head letting out a laugh.

"I do don't I?" I tease.

"So, I've been meaning to ask," Connery pauses. "How did it feel being back at home?"

"At first, just like every time I go back home, hard. I've had a lot of losses there, and going back reminds me of what I lost, of what's not here anymore." I frown. "But if we take that off of the equation, I was so happy I got the chance to spend time with my family. Especially, my grandparents, they're not getting any younger."

"I'm sure that they were just as happy to have you back home with them." Connery grins.

"They were," I reply. "I know I shouldn't pry, it's really none of my business, but I wanted to ask you how was your mom doing. I know I played a part it in it and I have no right to ask, so I understand if you don't want to share any details."

"Don't do that," Connery says as he reached for my hand. "I know I blamed you, I know we blamed you but it wasn't your fault. Any of it. Conrad made those choices willingly, you did nothing but uncover what was behind the mask. And if it weren't for you, we would still be living in a lie."

I smiled at Connery, it felt good, it felt good to finally believed.

Connery and I spent the rest of our time at Alejandro's finishing up our food and having too many conversations. We lost track of time and we came to the realization when Alejandro was beginning to pack up the truck. I was supposed to take Connery back to the house but he asked if he could stay over at my place and I wasn't going to insist on taking him back to the house. Besides, having him stay with me while Peyton stayed with Dant made me feel safe. The death threats kept showing up at our doorstep every other day and I feared that they would get to a point where they wouldn't be threats anymore.

"There are fresh towels in the cabinet below the sink," I tell Connery pointing to the white cabinet doors. "Also, I put a change of clothes by the edge of my bed. If you need anything else, I'll be in the kitchen."

Connery wanted to take a shower and change out of the clothes that he was currently wearing, I didn't mind him sleeping with those clothes on but the truth was that they reeked of alcohol. Luckily, I had a few stolen hoodies and sweatpants that I had grabbed from his place before the article had come out.

He nods and I smile at him before I begin to walk out of my bathroom. "Actually, I think I do need your help with something."

I turn around to face Connery and he was standing inside the shower fully clothed. "How does this thing work?"

"You have to open the top handle first and then the second one," I replied but then I realized it was better if I showed him instead. "Here, let me show you."

I walked up to the shower and I opened it completely forgetting about the fact that Connery was still inside fully clothed. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry!" I say and I couldn't help but laugh at a very annoyed Connery.

"That's not funny Ev," Connery says annoyed and I continue to laugh. "If you think that it's so funny, I think it is best if you joined me."

Connery didn't even let me protest, before I could even speak up I was under the shower with him. "Matthew Connery, I'm going to kill you, what do you think you're doing?"

"I'm saving you water, that's what I'm doing," Connery smirks and I playfully hit his chest.

Connery placed his hands on my waist and he looked at me deeply in the eyes. We both stood in silence with only the noise of the water running until he leaned in. In a matter of seconds, his lips were crashing into mine. He deepened the kiss as I wrapped my hands around his neck. His hands made their way from my waist to the end of my sweater and he pulled it over my head, breaking the kiss for just a few seconds. My hands then made their way to the end of his shirt and I pulled it over his head, we both took our pants off and we threw them on the bathroom floor leaving us in only our underwear.

He pulled his body closer to mine and signaled me to jump, with my hands once again wrapped around his neck I crashed my lips into his as he roamed his hands all over my back. Connery walked out of the shower and he walked into my bedroom. He lays my body on my bed and he rolls on top of me, pushing me on my back while he held himself with his elbows. And he whispers into my ear. "You look breathe taking Everest Green if you knew the things I've been wanting to do to you."

He leans in and his necklace crashes on my bare skin. Connery kisses me deeply and I kiss him back while I wrapped my arms around his neck. His hands make their way from my neck down to my thighs while his lips make their way to my neck. Leaving trails of kisses down my neck, he stops as he begins to nip at my neck leaving a mark.

Connery grabs the back of my knee, pushing it up against his waist, bringing me even closer to his bare body. He crashes his lips into my mine once again deepening the kiss even more when he added his tongue. His hand slides up my thigh and he begins to play with my underwear line, as he got further, I felt the need to stop him.

He was used to very experienced girls and it scared me that with me being a twenty-one-year-old virgin, I wouldn't live up to his expectations. I know it's a stupid thought and that he probably wouldn't mind it but I couldn't help myself from thinking it. "Connery,"

Connery stops and he looks into my eyes. I on the other hand, ashamed of what I was about to say, looked down. "Hey," He said lifting up my chin. "Don't be ashamed, never be ashamed. You're just as beautiful baby girl, just as beautiful. I'll take care of you, I promise."

What is love supposed to feel like?  One day you will meet someone who will see the universe that was knitted into your bones, and the embers of galaxies glow to life in your eyes. And you will finally know what love is supposed to feel like. Wrote Nikita Gill.

In between his arms and tender kisses. The soft whispers that escaped his lips. In between the warmth of his embrace and the fierceness of his touch. I found myself lost inside his soul.

A/N

Hi everyone, I hope you're all enjoying the holidays so far! ✨ I just wanted to quickly pass by and thank you for all of your support, Chasing Gold hit 11k, thank you!

Also, I wanted to ask if you would like to see more chapters with a little bit more mature content. It's not something I usually write, but if you enjoy reading it please let me know so I can write a little more for you guys in the upcoming chapters (;