A V E R Y

We ate in silence for a bit, both of us comfortable and consumed in our own thoughts.

With me, I couldn't stop thinking about the people I had killed.

It was so ridiculously easy to end a life. A bullet to the head or a slash to the throat and the person would be dead. No more. And though I was used to it by now, it still hurt my heart after.

Like now, I was thinking about whether any of them had family that they were close to, people they loved that would miss them, who would expect them home for dinner and instead get a phone call from someone who's job was to deliver that kind of information. Were any of them doing the dirty work because they had to? Because they didn't have a choice? Or were they choosing to make all the wrong decisions, ending up with blood on their hands?

I shook my head to clear the thoughts and glanced at the boy sitting opposite me, ripping a tissue into little squares on the table.

Mason looked up and smiled softly, his dimple appearing.

Chico hermoso.

That small action only made me want to kiss him more.

'You're spiralling,' he murmured, when I looked away, swallowing hard to get the image of blood spraying the walls out of my head. 'Hey. Look at me, love.'

I did so, and when he saw the emotions written all over my face, that for once I couldn't mask, he stood, gently pulling me up with him.

Mason took me to the toilets in the back and pulled me through, locking the door behind him. When I turned to him, eyebrows raised suggestively, he chuckled.

'Do not tell me what you're thinking right now, love. Come here.'

I sat on the closed toilet and closed my eyes. A few seconds later, a warm material was pressed against my skin, smoothing and wiping away the blood.

The blood of the man I'd killed.

I stayed silent, letting the strokes of the towel soothe me. And I knew Mason was waiting for me.

Waiting to see if I needed a shoulder to cry on, or if I needed to talk.

And so we sat on the floor, backs to the wall, and I talked. I talked about my fears and what it was like when I killed a man for the first time, purely out of self-defense and fearing for my own life. I talked until my voice went raspy and I leaned my head onto Mason's shoulder, suddenly so tired I could barely keep my eyes open. I talked until the shakiness in my voice had disappeared, until Mason didn't need to keep finding excuses to touch me, but he did.

I talked until my heart wasn't so heavy anymore.

'You'd think a grown ass woman and an assassin would be able to kill a man and get over it,' I chuckled, moving my head away from Mason's shoulder. 'I guess not.'

'That only makes you human. You feel bad because you killed someone, but let's be real here - he was going to do the same you.' He clenched his jaw. 'Worse, maybe.'

I made a sound of half-agreement and turned to face the wall, 'That doesn't make it any better though, does it?'

Silence. Then, 'First time I killed a man was when I was fifteen. My father made me do it - apparently the guy had broken the code of silence by going to the police-'

'Omérta?'

Mason nodded. 'Yeah. So we had to get rid of him. And my father saw the opportunity to show me the ways of an assassin, so he locked me in a room with the guy until I killed him.'

I frowned. 'But her was a grown-ass man, though, so why didn't he fight back?'

He swallowed and took a second before he spoke again. 'He was beaten up pretty bad. There was no chance he could use his hands, and running away was useless, seeing as neither of us was leaving until the other was dead - father's orders.So I did it.'

I squeezed his hand in understanding. No words needed to be spoken. The fact that he even told me that story told me a lot - that he was willing to trust me, and that his father was a dickhead. ' The guy tried to save himself by trying to kill me, and I don't blame him. But I couldn't just let him beat me.'

Silence.

'I really fucking hate your dad.'

'Me too.' He said quietly.

It was a little awkward between us, I realised. We weren't friends, but then again, we weren't together, either, so that left us in the grey space. But surely we were acquaintances? 

And I sure as hell was not going to ask him the status of our relationship.

So I moved the topic on to GRAVITY. 'The party's in just over a week, you know. Have you got a suit yet?'

Mason nodded. 'Yeah, I do. I went yesterday with Jacob and Josh and we all got ours together.'

'What colour is it?'

He grinned sweetly, dimple making my stomach flip.'Now, that would ruin the surprise, so I'm not telling you.'

'Dickhead.'

'Beautiful.'

I laughed and stood, dusting my jeans and the back of my shirt. I offered a hand to him and he took it, using his own strength more to get up.

And the spaz inside me decided to make an appearance, so instead of walking out like a normal person, I tripped on nothing, grabbed tighter onto his hand, and fell.

I fell.

Me, a supposedly trained assassin with the grace of a panther.

I fell.

And pulled him down on top of me.

'Fuck-'

'Holy shit, I'm so sorry-'

'Jesus, I don't even know how that happened-'

We were both rambling to try and cover the fact that Mason was on top of me, his weight held off from pressing on to me as he pushed himself up using his hands, braced on the floor either side of his head, and that I was in a very comprising position indeed.

I had a feeling that ny cheeks were flushed, my eyes were wide open, and my breathing was not normal.

I was a mess.

And so when Mason began leaning down, for a moment I let myself lean up before reason came into ny head and I pulled away, clearing my throat.

His beautiful face fell for a split second, but I saw it, and he rolled to get off me. I stood for the second time and laughed nervously.

'We should probably go before they think we're having sex in here,' I joked, unable to stop the words as they came pouring out of ny mouth, my cheeks flushing a little. 'Shit, I'm sorry, I'm saying all the wrong things, aren't I?'

Mason chuckled, trying to decrease the embarrassment levels for me, but I still cursed internally at myself. 'It's okay, love. Shall we go?'

I nodded and walked out of the bathroom, my blood pounding in my veins as my own words replayed in my head.

'We should probably go before they think we're having sex in here.'

Oh my god, someone should just lock me up or sew my mouth shut, because I was pretty sure I couldn't control what came out of it.

One day it would get me into a fuckload of trouble, and I was pretty sure that moment was approaching soon.

For now, though, I swallowed my shame and sat down in our booth. We were in a small, secluded restaurant that barely no one knew about, so getting recognised together wouldn't really be a problem.

'Do you want anything else to eat?' Mason enquired, gesturing to my now empty plate.

'No, I'm good. Ready to go?'

'Yeah, I'll drive you home.'

We left the diner and made our way to Mason's car, which he'd parked a little way off from where I'd been taken. I slipped in to the passenger seat and buckled in, my fingers hooking into the hole as I fitted it in.

Mason got in beside me, and started the car, not saying a word. I bit my lip and looked out of the window, focussing in the sky and wispy clouds instead of wallowing in the strange atmosphere.

It was frustrating. And tense.

And I fucking hated not being in control of the situation.

I clasped and unclasped my hands, feeling nervous for the first time in years. I couldn't help but think that Mason was carefully watching my every action, as if I'd do one thing wrong and something bad would happen.

I was trying so hard to stay in my seat and not demand for him to pull over so I could kiss him.

But I knew that would be torture - not just for him, though, for me too, as I was constantly remind bidding myself why being with him was a bad idea, not mention dangerous.

My restraint was slipping away like sand through my fingers.

We stopped a road away from my house and Mason killed the engine.

'Did you pick up my bag? From when I got taken?' I asked, still not looking at him. 'I had some concealer in there that would be good at covering my bruises.'

'Yeah, I did. Let me get it, hang on.' he mumbled, the tone of his voice low and strangely intimate.

I nodded and watched as he twisted around to get my bag from the back seat. As he did so, his shirt lifted from his jeans, and suddenly I was staring at his well-defined abs and that trail of dark hair that led to a place I really didn't want to think about.

Except I was already thinking it.

I cleared my throat, and muttered a soft thank you as Mason pressed the bag into my hands, now fully facing me again. 

I pulled out my stick of concealer and flipped the mirror on the ceiling down so I could apply it to my neck. Purplish and blue bruises were already forming where that dickhead had strangled, Thank god I got to beat him up afterwards.

Callused hands took the tube gently and untwisted the cap. Blue eyes met mine and I sucked in a breath as Mason got closer to me. Jesus. I wasn't even looking or touching him, yet it felt like he was undressing me with his eyes.

I hated this fucking grey space. I hated not knowing whether he was into me or not, whether I was the only one feeling like my body was overrun with electricity.

'Where do you want it?' He asked, pulling out the stick with a pop, the concealer looking sticky - it had been in my bag for a while, and I wasn't sure the last time I used it. Oh well. It was an emergency. 

I pointed in silence to my neck and and a bruise on my neck. He nodded and began swiping it across my skin, whilst I pulled out the beauty blender and began blending. I blended it for a few seconds before he took that too, and decided to spend a couple of minutes making my skin look all one color.

'Do you think I should tell my sisters now?'

'About everything?'

'About everything.'

'Hmm.' A thoughtful look came over his face as he tried to keep focusing on the concealer and talk at the same time. 'I think you'll have to tell them eventually, to be honest. It's best you tell them and not them finding from somewhere else.'

'You're such a good voice of reason, you know. You should be my therapist.'

He chuckled, and finished with the blending, leaning back to look at his work. He looked pretty satisfied, and I looked at myself in the mirror. The blending was near-perfect, and there was just a smudge of red under my jaw.

'You know you can always come to mine if you need to'

'I know.'

I murmured a goodbye and then got out, my cheeks burning.

If I'd stayed there any longer, all up close and personal, I would've damned all of my rules to hell.

I would have kissed the hell out of him, and I didn't think that was what friends did.

Even if I wanted to.

***

My little assassins, I've missed you! I pretty much had no access to technology for a while so I couldn't update, and even though chapters will be a  little slow, I'm trying my best.

How are you liking the story? Do you think Avery and Mason will get together before the gala?

Remember to vote and comment to tell me how you feel!

Love you all,

-M